by Michael Dean
I took a few steps off to the side of the front door and took in the surroundings. There were various pictures of Scruffy, from birth to recent, set up everywhere around the living room and from what I could see, in the kitchen also. It was strange; there were a couple of pictures of him and me. Although I could see him as plain as day in the picture, I could see nothing of myself next to him. I was a blur; again, the curse of being a demon, at no time could I be self-aware. Not even in a picture.
I did my best in remaining as distant as I could be with the guests. Although my physical body needed food, I didn’t want to walk through the group to get some. I just felt out of place after Sandra scolded me. I felt like all eyes were on me. Whether they were or not was a matter of perception. I hovered around everyone, watching them. Shade would periodically come up to me, so did her parents and mine, to check to see if I was okay, but I remained in the background the best I could. For the first time that day, Sam and I were able to briefly chat, but he couldn’t stay long because he had to go back to work. Being that we were the only two here that were with Scruffy at the end, we didn’t need to say much to one another about him.
I knew that this was a time to remember my brother, but I couldn’t help staring at Shade from the back of the room almost the entire time I was there. I worried about what the world would be like for her and my daughter after I was no longer a part of it. Would they find happiness after I was dead? Would another man come along to take care of her and my daughter? The thought of both of those things cut me like a knife. Not because I was jealous of anything of that sort, but more because I couldn’t be the one in their future.
I made my way over to a window and stared out. I would occasionally look over my shoulder to study those that I loved, even Sandra. Their smiles, their tears, their anger, their tenderness were all human emotions I would surely miss. I needed to go to my spot. I have grown weary of all this death around me and the toll it takes on the humans. Just then, Shade approached me again.
“How are you doing over here…lackey?” She reached around my waist from behind as my gaze never strayed from the window.
“You haven’t called me that in a while.” I chuckled.
“Yeah…well…you just look like you needed to laugh. Heck, I needed a laugh.”
I wrapped my arms over hers on my waist. “I did. Would you mind if I headed back to my tree and took some time to myself. I need to get away from all this for a while and think.”
“Is everything all right?” She pulled her arms back around and came around to my front between me and the window.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah…I’m fine. I just need to get out and clear my head. You know me. The best way for me to work things out within myself is to have solitude. I’ll be right as rain in no time.” I placed my hand on her cheek.
“Okay…all right. You need the car?”
“Nah…I’ll go the old fashioned way…I’ll fly.” I grinned.
She chuckled and we hugged. “I’ll swing in later to check on you then?”
“Sounds like a plan.”
We held hands and she guided me to our parents who were standing together. I told them that I was stepping out for a bit and would be back soon to visit. I received a hug from all and sidestepped my way through the guests and to the front door. It just so happened that Sandra was coming out of the bathroom nearby and we made eye contact as I reached for the doorknob. We both paused and she gave me a cynical stare before she brushed passed me back into the living room. I sighed and slipped out the door.
I decided to walk back to my spot; I didn’t feel like flying there. It took a while, but I made it and slowly strutted up the hill to my overlook. I stood at the base of my tree and stared up at my perch in wonder. This is where it all began. I whipped out my wings and soared up to my branch and perched on it, staring down at the town below like I’d done a thousand times before. I began to turn the pages in my head on my demon life.
I thought back to the times of when I sat here alone, with nothing or no one to comfort me except the company of a stray cat named Shadow. I reverted back to the times of staring at that beautiful girl sporting that button-filled backpack in class wondering what it would be like to be with her. Now, here I was as her husband.
I remembered all those times when Scruffy would embarrass me about my crush on her, or when he’d slap my back just to get a rise out of me, or those times when the teacher would get so furious with Scruffy because he wouldn’t shut his trap. It made me laugh.
I thought about our times at BNB’s, or when he was angry with me and we didn’t talk for a while. That time he came tumbling down the stone prison I was chained to when Shimmer had me as his prisoner. He was such a klutz. But the most touching of times were some of the last with him. The ski trip, the card games, those deep conversations we had and the promises we made to one another; last but not least, our final moment together. He saved my life…in more ways than one. I’d never truly thanked him for all that.
“I know you can hear me my old friend. I know you are out there somewhere. Thank you for all you’ve done for me. Thank you for your friendship…thank you for being my brother. I love you man. I’m so sorry…I’m so sorry.” I spoke out loud to the vast nothingness.
My mind didn’t stop there. I started to turn my thoughts back to my love, my heart. Shade was my very reason for being. She was my savior. All those nights spent in her room in secret, her diary, the candle in her window, the time she watched me show off in the woods just across the way from where I was sitting at this very moment. It made me think about that rock below that she was sitting on as she chronicled our relationship in that little black book that I was so against her doing at the time. I looked down at that very rock and hopped out of the tree. I squatted there and ran my hand across the spot where she liked to sit all the time when we were up here when she wasn’t in the tree with me.
I turned my head towards the setting sun and continued to think about her. When she was captured by Shimmer, the panic I felt when she was gone, our wedding, the first time we made love, I left no stone unturned in my mind over her. The more I thought about my numbered days and losing her, as well as the grief over losing Scruffy, the more my insides started to feel absent. Something was happening in me. A growing sorrow began to rise from within my gut, seemingly getting trapped within the confines of my throat. This was a feeling I was not familiar with. The more I thought about my brother, Shade, our families, the more I felt this hurt within me. Suddenly, I felt my eyes fill with moisture, I winced a bit. All of a sudden, a tear strolled down my cheek. I was crying…like the humans do. Never in demon history, that I know of, has a demon cried, but I was now.
My sorrow was interrupted by the sounds of a vehicle struggling up the dirt driveway. I looked over my shoulder and saw that it was Shade’s car topping the hill. I turned my gaze back to the sun. But my tears didn’t stop there. I heard my wife get out of the car behind me and shut the door. Her slow steps crunched upon the dirt and gravel as she approached. I tried to pull back my emotions, but when she put her hand on my shoulder, another one fell from my eye. She bent down in my face as if she was going to speak to me, but it appeared she saw what was written all over it. She didn’t say a word and just sat down next to me on the rock.
I didn’t make any eye contact with her, but I could see her staring at me with an empathetic look out of my purview vision. I just kept my gaze on the setting sun.
Shade gently rested her head on my shoulder and we took in the sunset together without speaking another word.
A final meeting with Christian was right around the corner. Because of that, I knew this would be the final time we’d ever get to sit in this spot together. Our time together was almost at an end.
~Acknowledgments~
To those that spend their hard earned money on up and coming authors, you are the ones that give us a chance at a better future, one word, one paragraph at a time. Thank you.
~About the Author
~
Michael Dean was born in Mountain View California in 1976, raised in Tucson Arizona, and now resides just outside of Dallas Texas.
Michael’s adventurous style has led him to start and run a successful small business for the past ten years, as well as writing YA novels and playing music. His passion for music and the pen collided when he was younger, causing him to pick up a guitar and write his own music. That drive led him to starting his own band, getting it played on regional radio stations, even competing in Ozzy Osbourne’s battle for Ozzfest in New York City.
Still just as driven, now he prefers quieter days to himself, thus giving him time to improve on his main passion, writing. Drift, a YA paranormal fantasy, is a bi-product of that alone time. He hopes that when a reader picks up his works, he or she will love it just as much as he did writing it.
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