Finding Jordie: Things aren't always what they seem. (The Love Lies Bleeding Series Book 1)

by Harley, HJ

  When we approached my building, there were still so many of them camped out.

  “How do they do that? How is there so many of them at once at different places?” I was amazed and confused all in one.

  “They’re like cockroaches, Jordan. They’re everywhere—even when you don’t see them they’re there.” He parallel parked across the street about six buildings down from mine. We hadn’t been spotted yet.

  “I don’t want to run, Nathan. I don’t want to seem like I’m annoyed at all this, annoyed at your life. I mean, yeah, it is a bit annoying, but I think running and hiding gives the impression...” I let out a frustrated sigh. “I can’t explain it correctly.” I put a hand on my chin. “It makes me seem stuck up, or like I’m too good for this bullshit. Am I making any sense?”

  “None, Jordie.” He laughed. “Breathe, baby.”

  There went my stomach again. I forced myself to focus.

  “I don’t want to come off as a bitch. There, that’s what I mean.” A sigh of relief left my lips.

  He kissed my hand. “Then we walk,” he said simply. He leaned over and kissed me quick and soft on my lips. “Wait for me to open your door, please?” His tone hinted that it was more of a demand than a request. He hopped out and quickly walked around to my side. The second my feet hit the ground I heard the stampede. Nathan quickly moved me to the side and shut the door. He put his arm around my shoulder, pulled me close to him, and kissed the top of my head. The crowd became a mass of moving bodies that formed a circle around us as we walked to my apartment. I managed a few closed lip smiles but said nothing. The sound of cameras clicking and the questions, one after another, each louder than the next, became one continuous stream of noise. We got to the door and Nathan shoved the key into the lock, guiding me in first with his hand on my back. I waited for him to get inside before closing the door and locking it.

  “That wasn’t so bad.” I flashed a smile.

  He pulled me in to him, leaning down, an awe-struck look in his intense blue eyes. “Does anything faze you? A man three times your size punches you in the face and what do you do? Stand up like it was a bug bite and go after him. Oh hey, my first relationship since my husband was tragically killed at war eight years ago happens to be with one of today’s most stalked after celebrities. You’re unaffected.” He looked at me, baffled.

  “You, sir, are not a celebrity to me,” I whispered, burying my head in his chest. “You’re just Nathan.” I smiled.

  Once upstairs, I plopped on the couch. He sat down next to me, and I leaned over and laid my head in his lap. He put one hand on my head, playing with my hair. With the other hand he was running a finger up and down my arm.

  “How did this happen?” I asked, staring at the flat screen even though it wasn’t on. I felt his body tense slightly as he stopped rubbing my arm to lean over and look at my face.

  “How did what happen, Jordie?”

  I shifted so I was on my back looking up at him, and draped my legs over the end of the couch. “All of this, so fast?”

  Blue eyes to green, we stared at each other intensely.

  “I’ve known you four days, Nathan. How... is it that...” I paused. “I don’t have the words right now.” I closed my eyes tight.

  “I understand.” His voice was quiet.

  “You can’t possibly know what I’m trying to say when I don’t even know what I’m trying to say. Nathan, what happens in ten days when you go back to Sacramento? Remember you don’t live here?” I opened my eyes. I knew they were filled with hurt. “Four days is not nearly enough time to... to feel...”

  “To feel the way you do.” He finished my sentence.

  “Who’s the nut job now?” I felt myself fold inward. I took his hand and he pulled me up onto his lap.

  “I guess we were meant for each other, two nut jobs.” He pressed his forehead to mine.

  “Miraculously, though, after my breakout film, everyone wanted to be my friend, date me, invite me here and there. So who could I trust?” He shook his head. “Even my co-stars didn’t take to me very well while filming, but after the film made every teenage girl and their mothers go absolutely bat-shit crazy for me, it all changed, and I shut down emotionally. It’s a shitty thing to know that everyone only wants you because you’re famous. You can’t trust anyone, except your family, of course.

  “Then there you were Friday night—beautiful, feisty, and oblivious to the world. You only cared about what was important, life’s essentials. When you first turned around and looked at me, I was waiting for the screams and oh my gods and holy shit! Nate Harper, waiting for you to pull out your cell phone and take a picture, start tweeting and making phone calls. You didn’t, though. You stood there not knowing who I was and looking right through me, into my eyes, and for one second you made me feel like Nathan again. Something opened up. So do you get it? I’ve been an emotional mute—as you so appropriately described it—too. You... you are... so you! And I live in Los Angeles,” he added with a big, bright smile.

  My heart melted. “You said you lived in Sacramento.” I furrowed my eyebrows.

  “No, you asked where I was from. I’m from Sacramento.” He grinned.

  “All right, you got me there.” I laughed and leaned in to kiss him, and we got lost in each other.

  I woke up in my bed and glanced at the clock. “Five-fifteen?” I shouted and sprang to my feet, disorientated. I heard Emma and Nathan downstairs.

  “I told you she’d lose it. Pay up.” Emma laughed.

  I hurried down the steps. They were sitting on the couch eating out of white take-out containers and watching a tabloid show.

  “Hi, Mom.” Emma waved over her shoulder without turning to look at me.

  Nathan placed his container of food on the coffee table and stood up.

  “What the hell, Nathan? Why did you let me sleep?” I leaned over and kissed Emma on the head.

  “Chill out, drama queen, it’s under control,” she managed to garble out with a mouth full of sushi.

  Nathan smiled his irresistible smile, making his blue eyes even brighter. He came around the end of the couch, grabbed me around my waist, and kissed my forehead.

  “Yeah, drama queen, it’s under control.” He smirked at Emma.

  “Oh, look!” she squealed and turned the volume on the television up too loud for me.

  “Emma, lower that, please.”

  “Shhhh, please!” she begged.

  I walked around and sat down on the couch, laughing at her reaction. Nathan went into the kitchen and came back holding a container of take-out and handed it to me.

  “I heard you’re a sucker for shrimp tempura.” He winked and sat down next to me.

  “Nate Harper, Hollywood’s hottest and until now most private celebrity, has found love in the Big Apple with local hot spot bar owner Jordie Spagnato. Pictures surfaced yesterday of the two of them packing on the PDA outside of Ms. Spagnato’s East Village apartment. Our sources tell us that the two met Friday night after Jordie was assaulted by an intoxicated patron and Nate broke up the scuffle, coming to her rescue,” the show’s host said.

  “Pfft, to my rescue? And what sources?” I rolled my eyes and opened the box of sushi.

  “Her bar, The Post, is located next door to her home, where these snapshots were taken of the two kissing and hugging,” she continued.

  “And what does that have to do with anything? Thanks for handing out my address to the world, lady! Is that even legal?” I screeched at the TV.

  “Do I have to rescue you again, Ms. Spagnato?” Nathan teased with an arched eyebrow.

  “Shut it.” I shot him a playful dirty look.

  “You were assaulted Friday night?” Emma interrupted our banter.

  “Uh, yeah, it’s no big deal.” I tried to make it seem like no big deal.

  “And you broke it up?” She looked at Nathan wide-eyed.

  He smiled big as he began to speak.

  “Don’t even!” I jumped in, laug
hing.

  “Nah, not exactly, kid. I had every intention of helping your mother, but instead I ended up having to restrain her from kicking the guy’s ass—er, butt.” He laughed quietly.

  “Figures,” she mumbled. “She’s in a fight club, you know.”

  She and I burst into laughter. Poor Nathan. He looked so confused.

  Our conversation was cut short by the sounds of a key in the lock. “It’s just me,” Rachel announced. “Sorry to barge in, we couldn’t stand out there.” She, Mike, and Carlos came into view. “I think you’re going to have to help tonight, Jordie. There’s a line down the street. Something tells me they’re not here to see us dance.”

  “I can get behind the bar, Jordie, but I think you’ll need me at the door,” Carlos chimed in.

  “I called and requested four security guards for tonight.” Nathan addressed Mike and Carlos. “They’ll be here at six. I thought it wouldn’t hurt for you two to have back up.”

  “Thanks, man.” Mike nodded.

  I grabbed my cigs and my sweater. “Everyone stay here.” I turned to the door.

  “No way, Jordie. If you’re going down there I’m going with you.” Mike blocked the door.

  “Me too.” Carlos came up behind me.

  “Guys, really. I’ll be five minutes. Since when can I not handle myself or any situation? Seriously, this coddling bullshit needs to stop,” I hissed through my teeth, pushing Mike to the side, and stormed out the door.

  As I reached the bottom step I heard the door upstairs open. Why don’t they listen to me? I took a deep breath in and flung my body around about to shout some obscenity when I saw Nathan coming down the steps.

  “Hey, what are you doing? Go back in, I’ll be fine,” I said with a small smile.

  “Jordie, this is all because of me. There’s no way I’m leaving you to deal with it alone,” he said as he reached the bottom step. He leaned down to kiss me.

  “Coming to Ms. Spagnato’s rescue again?” I flashed him a crooked grin.

  We walked out onto the porch and I explained to the police officers that I wasn’t opening the bar that night and some personal security was scheduled to arrive at six, so they could clear out the line at least.

  They assured me they would handle the line and swing by a few times throughout their shift to make sure everything was okay, and then four security guys in dark suits climbed out of a van. Nathan motioned for them to follow us inside.

  The one in charge looked to be in his forties. He had a solid buzz cut, military style. “Nate, it’s good to see you again, sir,” he said as he shook Nathan’s hand. “This is Charles, Matt, and Elliot. They’ll be on duty with me tonight. Same protocol per usual, sir?” His demeanor tugged hard at my memory.

  “Actually no,” Nathan said. “What I need tonight is this building and that building there covered. We won’t be leaving until the morning to bring her daughter to school, so whoever takes over in the A.M., Frank, please inform them that they’ll be accompanying us for the ride and spending the day with young Miss Spagnato at school.”

  “Spellman. Emma’s last name is Spellman,” I corrected.

  “Miss Spellman, I apologize.”

  “You got it, sir.” Frank shook Nathan’s hand again and nodded to me. “Miss.”

  “Thank you,” I said. “I have a few people leaving momentarily. They’re allowed here anytime. The woman—her name is Rachel—she has keys to both buildings. The two men, Mike and Carlos, they’re my security at the bar.”

  “Of course, no problem,” Frank said, stone faced.

  “Oh, and please, if you or your men need anything, bathrooms, food, a break, feel free to come up.”

  “Thank you, miss.” He nodded again and made his way out the door.

  Back upstairs, everyone was glued to the TV laughing and putting their two cents in.

  “I’m glad to see you all are amused by this train wreck.” I smiled sarcastically and sat down on the arm of the couch.

  “Wow, Nathan, the rumors of your homosexuality have been squashed.” Rachel snorted with amusement.

  “Yeah, that was always my favorite.” He rolled his eyes, his hand sliding over my back.

  “Okay, guys, you have the night off, paid of course,” I said.

  Before anyone could respond, the door buzzer sounded and Nathan got up to see who it was.

  “Yes, Frank?”

  “Sir, Mr. Duncan is here and would like to speak with you.” His tone gave me a chill, it was so familiar. Nathan was staring at me, for an okay I assumed.

  “Sure, of course,” I answered his unspoken question.

  “Send him up, please.” He buzzed his friend in.

  “Shiiit, Nate,” Tyler said when Nathan opened the door for him. Then he caught sight of the room full of people looking at him over Nathan’s shoulder and put a hand over his mouth. “Sorry,” he muttered and patted Nathan on the back hard. “What’s up, brother? Good to see things are back to normal.”

  “Uh-huh.” Nathan laughed with him. “Tyler, this is Jordie.”

  Tyler extended his hand out to me and I shook it.

  “Emma, Jordie’s daughter. Rachel, Mike, and Carlos.” Nathan gestured to each of them. Tyler nodded to everyone else.

  “Nice to meet you all.” His eyes were back to Rachel. Rachel grinned and looked down at the floor.

  What is up with that? Rachel playing coy? Not like her.

  “I just wanted to stop by and make sure everything was all right with ya, buddy. Your mom called me. She’s worried. You haven’t been answering her calls or texts.”

  “Shit, my phone died a bit ago. I don’t have my charger.” Nathan ran his hand through his hair.

  Tyler reached into the bag he was holding and pulled out a charger. “Here ya go. I figured you’d need it and this.” He handed him the charger and small blue bag in his hand.

  “Thanks so much. I’ll be right back.” Nathan climbed the stairs two at a time, taking the bag and charger with him.

  Tyler chuckled. “Uhhh, no, he won’t. You don’t know his mother.”

  “Welp, I’m out of here, bitches. I’m famished.” Rachel grabbed her purse and keys.

  “Eh, yeah, me too,” Tyler said. “Want some company?”

  She opened the door, staring at him, and held onto the knob. “You’re buying, music man.” She winked at him and tossed her hair as she walked out into the hallway.

  Tyler nodded at us. “Very nice to meet you all. Ask Nate to give me a shout, please.” He turned and headed down the steps in pursuit of Rachel.

  Mike and Carlos stood up and walked to the door.

  “I’m going to enjoy an unexpected evening off,” Mike announced as he stood in the doorway.

  “And I’m going to drag my roommate home. She’s been out there all day.” Carlos laughed.

  “Bye, guys. Thanks again. Business as usual tomorrow. I’m interviewing a few people in the afternoon, so hopefully we’ll have some dependable help soon.” I hugged them both and closed the door behind them.

  I plopped down on the couch and picked up my dinner. “Are you done with your homework?” I asked Emma, who was still glued to the TV.

  “Yup,” she said. “Nathan wouldn’t let me fifty question him until I was done.” She shook her head and grinned. “Nate Harper. He’s really nice, Mom.”

  “I know he is, and his name is Nathan. He isn’t Nate Harper around here. Understand? He isn’t here for your amusement.”

  “Of course not, he’s here for yours.” She smirked when she said it.

  Oh this kid... she is so... just like me. “I love you,” I told her as I finished up the last of my dinner. We watched TV together for a while, then I said, “Time for bed.”

  “Yes, Ms. Spagnato.” She gave me a little smirk and saluted.

  I went upstairs. Nathan was sitting on the end of my bed, still on the phone attached to his charger. Two and a half hours on the phone with his mom? Tyler wasn’t kidding.

  “I will
, I promise.” He laughed. “Yes, Mom. Yeah, she just walked in the room. I know... I don’t think so.” He chuckled. “Today has been traumatic enough.” He looked over at me. “All right, love you too, Mom.” He hit a button on his phone and sprawled across the bed letting out a throaty, “Ahhhhhh.”

  “I swear to all that is holy that was the longest conversation I’ve ever had with her.” He sat back up on the edge of the bed and extended his arms for me. I walked over and he grabbed me by my behind and pulled me close so I was standing between his legs.

  “I don’t know how it’s possible, but I’m tired.” I yawned.

  “It’s been a trying day, Jordie.”

  I moved my knee to his and closed his legs to straddle him. I sank down on his lap and kissed him.

  “I thought you were tired?” He looked at me suspiciously.

  “Fine,” I said and moved to get up.

  He squeezed me tighter and lay back on the bed, bringing me down with him. He pushed the hair that was hanging down in his face behind my ears. His eyes never left mine. My stomach was in blissful turmoil.

  “You feel that, don’t you?” His eyes still held mine. “I’ve never felt that before. Ever. I’ve never had my insides twist in such a way as they do when I touch you.”

  All I could do was nod, because the truth was, neither had I. I’d loved Jason, but his touch, his smile, he never did to me what Nathan did. A pang of guilt ran through me. I shouldn’t feel guilty. Jason died. I didn’t leave him, I’m not being unfaithful to him. I was a faithful, honest, and more than forgiving wife to him. It’s been eight years since I’ve had a relationship. I’ve waited a long time for this. I deserve to be happy, don’t I?

  “What are you thinking about in there?” Nathan reached up and ran his fingers across my cheek to my lips, breaking my train of thought.

  “Nothing. Just arguing with myself again.” I laughed.

  “You do that often?” He smiled my smile.

  “I do.” I raised my eyebrows. “But it’s okay, I always win.”

  We both laughed and he leaned up to kiss me again. This time he sat up and wrapped one hand in my hair at the nape of my neck. With the other he cupped my behind and pulled me as close as possible to him. I could feel him against me. I slid my arms around his neck and knotted my hands in his hair.