Iniquity (The Ascent Book 1)

by Melody Winter

  “Lace?”

  “Keep it hidden from him.” She scratched her nose, and pushed her grey hair away from her face. “Don’t let him find it.”

  Closing her hand over mine, she squeezed it tightly.

  My face heated and my skin felt like a thousand ants were crawling over it. Myrtle thought that Paymon had slept with me last night and obviously expected him to continue doing so. I caught my bottom lip between my teeth and looked at the ground. This was always the deal. Not just marriage but everything that came with it. My mouth moved, but no words came out. Had Gran given any thought to what Paymon would do to me?

  “Athena!”

  Thomas raced across the central opening in the village. His body slammed into mine, and his dirt-covered hands grabbed my face holding me close enough to smell the morning of hard labour on his clothes. I squirmed in his hold and tried to push him away.

  “Don’t,” I said, hooking the pouch of lace onto my belt as he released me.

  Myrtle stepped closer. “You know what choice to make. Don’t be a fool and risk it all. Don’t sentence us to his anger.”

  She hobbled away, and her departure led to the other women leaving. Not one of them stayed to talk to me, or offer any support. Only Thomas remained. He dipped his head, trying to make eye contact with me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look into his soft, loving eyes, not now.

  “What happened? Are you okay?” He rubbed the top of my arms with his hands. “Why didn’t you come home last night?”

  “Please, don’t touch me.”

  A frown pulled across his forehead. “Why not? What’s wrong?”

  I backed away.

  “Athena, I need answers here. What’s going on?” His words were clipped, edged with frustration.

  I sank onto the log and stared at the dwindling fire. Aware of Thomas shuffling to sit next to me, I shifted away from him, ensuring a significant gap was created between us.

  “I couldn’t come back last night. Paymon made me stay with him at his house.” I twisted the end of my hair around my fingers, unwilling to face him.

  “Why? Why did he make you stay?”

  I shrugged my shoulders. I didn’t really understand his insistence that I stay. The only reason I could think of was to keep me away from Thomas.

  “We were going to announce our engagement. I could hardly do it with you not there.” His voice rose, his frustration brimming over. “You could at least have made some effort to get back.”

  I rubbed my hand over my forehead. “I couldn’t,” I repeated. “I wanted to come back, but he wouldn’t let me.”

  Thomas huffed. “So the demon who killed your gran and my parents is more important than me?”

  I sucked in a deep breath. “No, of course not. Do you think I wanted to stay with him?”

  “So he tied you down, physically stopped you from returning?”

  “No.” I wanted him to understand, but couldn’t think how to explain everything that had happened. Even though Paymon hadn’t forced me to do anything, the threats he had carefully wheedled into our earlier conversations made me too afraid to even think about disobeying him. Guilt suddenly swept over me, and I dipped my head, shying away from any eye contact. I’d spent the night in a large comfy bed, warm and dry. I’d not given any thought to our engagement party. I released a long drawn-out sigh and shifted further along the log.

  “I have to go back to the house tonight,” I said, my gaze downcast. “Paymon won’t let me stay in the village.”

  Thomas kicked a stone into the fire. “So when will you come back?”

  I shook my head, swallowing the lump that had risen in my throat. “I won’t.”

  Thomas reached for my hand, his demeanour changing to that of the man I knew and loved. “So Myrtle was right. He’s sending you away?”

  I didn’t pull my hand away from his. The comfort it offered was welcome, reassuring and familiar, but I knew it was short-lived. This would probably be the last time I spoke to him. I chewed my bottom lip, uncertain how much to tell him. “He’s not sending me away,” I muttered.

  “What do you mean? Either he is, or he isn’t.” He squeezed my hand. “Athena look at me, please. Explain what’s happened.”

  The dwindling flames of the fire spluttered. I saw their pathetic attempt to burn brightly as a direct comparison to my relationship with Thomas.

  “Paymon’s asked me to marry him,” I said.

  “What? I hope you told him what to do with his stupid proposal.”

  I didn’t reply. I couldn’t bring myself to confirm the situation, but my silence said more than words ever could.

  Thomas sat upright, his hand releasing mine. His gaze followed mine into the fire.

  “I have to marry him,” I eventually said. “If I don’t, I’ll be sent to the Master and married to him. If I don’t marry Paymon, he’ll come to the village and torture you all. People will die . . . and it will be my fault.”

  “What about our plans? We were to be married, stay in the village, and have children together.” His eyes held mine, an accusing stare that he had no right to cast my way.

  I closed my eyes, but the life I’d envisioned with him had already been snatched away by Paymon.

  “You can’t go back to Paymon. Why don’t we run away together? Spoil his stupid plans.”

  “What?”

  “Run away with me. We can go now or this afternoon. Let’s get away from here.”

  “We can’t,” I said, shaking my head. Running away wasn’t an option. I slid my feet back and forth in the dirt. “I have to go back to Paymon.”

  “To marry him?”

  I nodded.

  “So you’d rather marry a demon than run away with me?” His voice was raw, choked, threatening to spill over into anger.

  “If we ran away together, we’d be found. He’d find us,” I said, understanding the true horrors of what would come. “Believe me, he’d find us. He’s already warned me not to be around you. Running away with you would seal our fate. He’d kill you, and me . . . well, I’m not sure.”

  “No demon will ever kill me.” He puffed his chest out, an action so comical but tragically unfounded.

  “You don’t know Paymon. By not running away with you, I’m saving your life and probably many others in the village.”

  I didn’t know what else to say. The silence was uncomfortable, rising around both of us and wrapping us in its unnerving cold grasp.

  Thomas stared into the flames of the fire. The crackling of the wood was the only sound. I followed his gaze, wishing more than ever that he’d tell me it would all be okay. Everything would be fine.

  When he jumped to his feet, the move was sudden and unexpected. The iciness of his stare pierced every part of me.

  “Go, then!” he shouted. “Go and marry your demon.”

  “What?” I understood he was hurt, angry, and desperate, but to turn on me like this was cruel. “Haven’t you heard anything I’ve said?”

  He pointed an accusing finger at me. “If you go back to him, I want nothing more to do with you.”

  “Thomas—”

  “No, forget it, Athena. Forget about us, forget about our engagement. There is no us anymore. Go and marry Paymon. Maybe he’ll share his secrets about the light, whisper it in your ear when he’s screwing you.”

  My gaze hardened, and I gritted my teeth.

  “The truth hurts, doesn’t it?” he said before spinning around and storming away.

  How dare he speak to me like that? I was about to shout after him, ask him to come back, not to end things this way, but I stopped myself. What was the point?

  I slumped onto the log and stared at the fire for several minutes. When I lifted my head and systematically focused on every house within view, doors were suddenly shut, a barrier between them and me. No one was around.

  A fluttering of wings to my side shifted my attention. Odin had landed and was strutting toward me.

  “Now what?” I asked h
im as he fluttered onto the log beside me.

  He cawed, not loud and brash like he usually did, and tipped his head sideways.

  “You coming with me?” I said as I stood.

  I wandered to my home with Odin hopping alongside me, but once I pushed the door open, he flew away.

  I moved the rug aside and stared blindly at the room. I couldn’t help but compare my simple home with the luxury of my surroundings last night. The bed at Paymon’s was soft, not lumpy and itchy, and the water was warm, not cold enough to form goose bumps. I pulled his cloak even tighter, welcoming its warmth.

  The table was littered with pots and mugs of mismatched shapes and sizes. It seemed that even though I wasn’t here last night, the party celebrating my twenty-first birthday had still been held. The room smelt of stale body odour, and an underlying waft of spilt mead drifted in the air. I ignored the mess and walked into my bedroom. The multiple blankets were neatly folded across the bed, and I half-smiled at an action I had never known Thomas to complete before—he wasn’t the tidiest of men.

  I needed to pack for when I returned to Paymon’s later today. I pulled the book, containing all its secrets, from under the mattress and stuffed it in an old fabric bag. The only other items I wanted with me were my mother’s perfume and a faded photograph of my parents and sister. I wrapped the bottle of perfume and the photo in layers of socks before stuffing them in the bag on top of the book.

  I ambled back into the kitchen and placed the bag on the kitchen table. I huffed. The main room was in such a mess after the party, and a trip to the village well was necessary. I wouldn’t leave my house like this even if I had no idea when or if I’d return.

  I called for Hannah on my way to collect the water. Her mother came to the door when she heard me calling, but her usual friendly nature had disappeared. She was brisk with her response, telling me that Hannah was in the main hall, working, and I was not to disturb her. There was no further small talk, and she shut the door on me.

  I kept my head down as I trudged to the well, not wanting to make eye-contact with the few people that were around. Each step I took seemed to take me further away from the only family I’d ever known. My stomach twisted, uneasy with the emptiness of food and now with the ache of losing Thomas in all this madness. Who’d comfort me this time? Paymon? I doubted that he’d know how. He’d probably just feed from my upset and confusion. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and kept walking, ignoring the silence that hung around me.

  Once at the well, Odin made another appearance. And when I walked back through the village, water slopping over the sides of the buckets as I struggled with their weight, he fluttered along the thatched roofs of the houses, following me.

  I pushed the heavy rug to the side when I arrived at my house. Stepping sideways through the doorway I placed the buckets on the floor, groaning as the water spilt over the sides. Straightening up, I rested my hands on my hips and leaned backward, stretching out the knots in my back.

  The fluttering of wings caused my attention to swing to the open window. Odin stood proud on the wooden ledge and cawed loudly at me, not quietly like earlier. Was this the call of the raven, the sign to tell me it was time to return to Paymon? It was earlier than I expected, not even midday.

  Odin cawed again, impatiently waiting for me—flapping his wings and hopping back and forth on the windowsill—but the noise wasn’t loud enough to disguise a stifled moan that came from my bedroom. With no locks or other ways to secure our homes, the villagers adhered to a high level of trust, but other’s bedrooms were not privy to the same level of openness. Another muffled moan urged me forward.

  I moved quietly and only inched the rug away from the side of the doorway. The silent gasp that flew from my mouth was immediately covered by my hand.

  Even in the subdued light cast by a solitary flickering candle, I could see exactly what was happening. Bending forward over my bed was a woman, her skirts pushed up around her waist. A man was behind her. He still wore his shirt, but his breeches were around his thighs. The woman’s long blond hair was wrapped around his fist, and he was pulling her head backward. She moaned encouragingly, alternated with a sharp breath forced from her body each time he thrust his hips to her raised bottom. So shocked by what I was seeing, I only registered the overall image of two people having sex. It took several long moments before the painful truth seeped into my recognition. The two people on my bed, lost in their wild guttural actions, were Thomas and Hannah.

  I BACKED AWAY FROM THE doorway. Every part of me wanted to scream, run into the room and drag them apart. But I didn’t.

  I turned around, picked up my bag from the table, grabbed a lit lantern and headed outside. I moved slowly, my steps short and unsteady. Once I reached the path that led to my destination, Odin flew alongside me before hopping onto the ground.

  “He’s got what he wanted,” I said to him. “I’ll marry him.”

  Odin cawed and then took off into the sky.

  My short journey gave me too much time to mull over what I’d witnessed. My mind unkindly pasted a detailed image of what I’d seen. How could Thomas do that to me? How could Hannah betray my friendship? We were best friends. Well, not anymore. Thomas could mess with her all he wanted between now and tomorrow evening because she’d then be sent away. I couldn’t feel sorry for her, not at the moment. And Thomas—the one man I had trusted above all others. Had he been seeing Hannah behind my back, or was this the first time? I tried to fight the tears that were so near to falling. All the times when Thomas had been late back from the fields, running off to sort something that couldn’t wait . . . was he with Hannah? When he came home drunk from the feasts I didn’t attend, had he been with her? I groaned and clutched my stomach with my free hand. Leaning over, I spat out the bile that had risen in my throat.

  Then the tears started. They flowed as fast as the stream that bordered the south of the village. No wonder Hannah didn’t want to tell me who she was sleeping with.

  My unwelcome tears rolled down my cheeks, and I sniffed loudly. I didn’t want to cry over what I’d lost. We wouldn’t be together again anyway. I was to be married to someone else. I looked ahead, facing the imposing house in the distance—facing my future. There was no turning back, not now. I had a new life to start living. I needed to leave the village girl behind. I was going to marry a demon.

  With a renewed determination to be brave and strong, I walked briskly. I focused on the one potential good thing to come from all this—information. I would use my time with Paymon to find out why we were in constant darkness. And maybe, just maybe, I’d find out how to get the light back permanently.

  Approaching the house, I untied the pouch of lace from my belt and slipped it into my bag. When I looked up, Odin had settled on the gate. He leaned forward, repeating the action he’d demonstrated the first time he appeared at my window. It was a strange gesture, and I was still convinced that he was going to topple forward.

  “Stupid bird,” I muttered. “You’ll do that one day and end up on the ground.”

  He flapped his wings and returned to a normal standing position before turning and facing the door.

  “I know,” I said, watching him. “He’s waiting for me, yes?” Just as I was about to tut at myself for thinking a bird could understand me, Odin dipped his head several times in quick succession.

  “Athena?”

  I spun around. Paymon was standing at the door.

  “You’re upset.” He stayed in the doorway, arms folded as he observed me. “What’s happened?”

  I shook my head. I couldn’t tell him.

  “I didn’t expect you back until later,” he said, moving aside as I stepped into the warmth.

  “You sent Odin for me,” I said, catching sight of him as he flew onto the same perch in the hall as when I arrived yesterday.

  “I can assure you I didn’t. I wanted to give you as much time as possible in the village so you could say your goodbyes.” He tutted and the
n continued, “Is that why you’re upset, because you’re leaving them?”

  “No.” I felt my tears building again.

  “Tell me what’s bothering you. Take the cloak off and extinguish the lantern. I’ll be in the lounge.” He swept away, striding to the doorway across the hall.

  When he disappeared from view, I blew out the candle in the lantern and placed it on the floor with my bag. I shrugged his thick cloak from my shoulders and hung it up before pausing and taking several slow calming breaths.

  When I entered the room, I immediately focused on Paymon. He was sitting in a chair, his back to me.

  “Come in, Athena. Don’t linger in the doorway.”

  I shut the door before turning around and inspecting what was another amazing room. Candles were situated on several surfaces, lighting the space in a comforting, warm orange glow. A fire blazed away in the fireplace giving off so much heat that I could feel it from the doorway. There was a large comfy looking chair, big enough for four people to sit on, positioned across from the fire. Other chairs filled the room, all of them covered in fabric. There were no wooden seats here.

  “Warm enough?” Paymon asked, turning to face me.

  I nodded.

  “I noticed you seem to struggle with the cold. You’ll have no need to worry about that whilst you are here. Now, sit down.” He gestured toward the large chair with a sweep of his arm. I duly did as he’d requested, convinced that this chair was what my Gran had referred to as a sofa.

  “Books,” I gasped as I saw the rows of neatly arranged spines upon four shelves. Books were a luxury in the village. I’d only ever seen a dictionary and the secret book I possessed.

  “Yes, I like to read. I have a library—the room next to this one. Perhaps you’ll read to me sometime? You can read, can’t you?”

  I nodded before lifting my gaze to his. When our eyes met, he smiled.

  “Athena, tell me why you’re so upset.”

  I took a deep breath, and then gritted my teeth. “Thomas,” I said, as if that one word would suffice.