Accidentally Love Her: An Accidental Marriage Romance

by Lauren Wood

  “I just don't know what happens next.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, what happens next with us? Where do we go from here?”

  10

  Craig

  I wanted to tell her so badly that it was killing me. The problem was, that I knew that I shouldn't. She hadn’t been here long enough, for me to tell her the truth. It was all that I wanted to do, so that she knew she was mine, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I just knew that it would be a mistake.

  “There are a lot of options for us.”

  “Yeah, like what?

  “We live on the other half of the world. Well not that far, I'm being dramatic, but it is certainly a long flight and I can see it getting very expensive very quickly, going back and forth.”

  The last thing I was worried about was money. I would spend my last dime, which I had quite a few of, just to see her again. I wasn't worried about any of it because I already knew that she wasn't going anywhere. She was my wife now, and she would live with me, like husband and wives did should. It was all that I needed. I knew that she wasn't ready to hear that though. She was still clinging to the idea that she had some say in this.

  “Are you really worried about money?”

  “No, not really. I just don't know how this is going to work. I don't know how we can be with each other, the way we want to be and be so far apart. It just doesn't make sense to me.”

  “What about you moving here for good?”

  I started to get a sinking feeling in my gut when she got this expression on her face. It felt to me like she hadn't even thought of it. That was the worst part for me I think. The idea that she hadn't even thought about staying here, told me that I was right not to say anything about us being married. I had a ring in my pocket, had had it in there since last night and I still hadn't brought it out. I didn't want her to be suspicious, and if she hadn't thought about moving here at all, it told me that I was further off than I thought.

  “It was just an idea Jeanine. I didn't mean to upset you about it.”

  “No, no. It’s not like that at all. It is just really fast Craig. I have only been here a day. I mean, that isn’t even on my radar yet.”

  She was honest, I liked that of course, but at the same time, it was hard to hear that. It was hard to hear that she hadn’t even thought about moving here. I had just made her come repeatedly until she was slack underneath me, and she hadn’t thought of moving here? That didn’t make sense to me. All I could think about was the future and it seemed like Jeanine was just living in the moment. That bothered me more than I cared to admit.

  “Well, I know that we have only been around each other for a day, well two almost. But we have been talking for a very long time. You never thought about what would happen if you moved here for good?”

  “I just don't know what I would do here Craig. I'm a little bit more into the logistics. What would I do for a living?”

  “You can obviously see that you don't have to do anything. All you have to do is be here with me.”

  She told me that it would make her feel like a kept woman and I wasn't even sure what that was. Whatever it was to her though, made her scrunch up her nose in disgust.

  “I can't do that Craig. I don't want to live for just a man. What would be the point of all of the studying and education that I went through?”

  “Well who do you think is going to take care of the kids? You really want somebody that is a stranger to take care of our children?”

  That got an even worse look and I was starting to wish that I hadn’t said a word. I don't even know how we got on this topic, but I knew that I wanted to get off of it. Apparently, she hadn't thought about staying, or having children with me. I certainly wasn't going to tell her that she was married to me now. Jeanine with not seeing it as sweet, like I had hoped. She was going to get mad. I didn't want her to get mad, so I tried to calm her down.

  “I mean, this is in the future obviously. You know that I have never been married, never thought of having kids, but I think of all those things with you. I don't even want to think about the idea of you leaving, let alone plan for you to go. I always figured that we would hit it off when you got here, and you would stay. Was I wrong for thinking that way?”

  Jeanine looked down and then she sat up to get dressed. I knew that it wasn’t a good sign, but I had to see it through. I had to see what she really felt.

  “I am not saying that those things can't happen in the future, but I think we need more time. Even if I was going to stay here with you Craig, I have a whole life in America that I have to take care of. I can't just drop everything and come here to be with you. I mean, it took me how many months to get a couple of weeks off to be here to begin with?”

  She was still holding on to the job and I knew that was going to be a problem. She didn't have a chance of getting that sort of work here, especially not for what she was making, so I wanted to tell her in a way that she had to let it go. I knew that I shouldn't though. Jeanine wasn't going to take it very well. She didn't want to be a kept woman. Whatever the hell that meant.

  I got up and started to get dressed, not wanting to have my hard cock out when it was just going to be a waste of time. She didn't want to have anything to do with that right now, or to do with me by the look of things. Jeanine was trying to get some space. Apparently now I knew that there was a bad side to all of her honesty. Her facial expressions showed what she thought inside, even when her words didn't.

  “Why are you getting upset Jeanine? I would think that the idea of a man wanting to marry you would be a good thing.”

  “Marriage?”

  I was batting a thousand today. She hadn’t thought about that either.

  “We couldn't have children and you live with me unless we were married Jeanine. It just wouldn't work here.”

  “I think we need to get back to your house and just have a drink or something. I don't know about you, but I really need a drink right now. This isn't a conversation that I thought we were going to have the second day I was here. Or the last day I was here for that matter.”

  I didn't understand why she was pulling back, and I wanted to get some answers. It felt like she was pulling away from me, and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to deal with that. It was becoming clear that everything that I thought I knew about Jeanine, was wrong. I knew that she was afraid of commitment, especially when relationships have been so bad for her in the past. But it was me. It wasn't someone else, it was me. I thought she knew the difference and I thought she knew that what we had was special. How could we have a life together if she wasn't even willing to think about it in that way?

  We went back to the house and it was very quiet. I didn't know what to say, afraid that I was going to say something to piss her off or upset her. I'm not even sure how I did it in the first place. My control was apparently not as strong as I thought. As soon as I took my hands off of her, I lost most of it and now I was scrambling to get some of it back. Why can't she see it for what it was?

  “I know that you are upset Jeanine, but I assure you that it wasn't my goal. I would never try to make you mad. I thought that you were on the same page with me on that. We talked about everything, I feel like this is meant to be, so I guess I just don't get why you wouldn’t want me to want these things with you.”

  “I am not mad Craig. I'm just a little confused. It just seems to be happening really fast and I'm still trying to figure out how it's all supposed to work. You know that I love you, and we are great together, but there has to be more than that. Don't you think?”

  “I do get it, but we don't have a lot of time.”

  We were back at the house and Jeanine had a headache all of a sudden. I figured that she just wanted some space and I was kicking myself for pushing it. That certainly hadn’t gone the way that I wanted it to. It was all supposed to go so smoothly, but there was truth in what she said. She wasn’t there yet. She was married to me, but she didn’t need to know
that.

  My phone rang, and I answered it. It was a number that I knew well, and I knew that I was going to have to go. I called up to Jeanine because it was an emergency, but she wasn’t answering. I finally just told the maid to tell her that I had to go, and Lisbeth was looking at me with a question in her eyes. I didn’t answer to anyone, here or anywhere else, but Lisbeth was different. There was nothing more that I wanted to do but stay. But I had to go.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to go up there?”

  The older woman smiled at me with her silver tooth in the front and her pudgy face. Lisbeth was one of the only ones that didn’t care what I thought. She knew my family and that was something that I couldn’t deny. She knew how I was.

  “No, she has a headache and I got a call. Just let her know for me.”

  “Aye. When is she going to start wearing her ring? It is unseemly for her not to.”

  I told her that I wasn’t worried about how it looked. I wasn’t going to admit that I had coerced her, and she didn’t even know about it. I didn’t think that it was going to go over all that well. The more I tried to deny what I had done, the more I realized that I had made a mistake. Jeanine was not going to take too kindly to it. She was not going to find it romantic as I’d hoped. Anyone else in the town would marry me, all I had to do was ask, if that, but not Jeanine. She was a challenge in so many ways and I was still trying to get used to it. I didn’t need Lisbeth rubbing it in and I left irked.

  11

  Jeanine

  I heard the front door closed and I went downstairs to see if somebody was here. I was going downstairs to see if Craig was gone, and he was. I looked around for a few minutes, and then realize that he had taken off. Was this our first fight?

  When I saw the maid, Lisbeth, I asked her where Craig had ran off to. From the way she looked at me, it felt like she didn't want to tell me. I don't know why, but I was getting a weird vibe from her. She looked at my hand several times, but I wasn't sure what that was about. It was sort of an awkward moment and I didn't want to make it worse.

  “The master of the house has left for the evening. He will probably be back late, he said he had an emergency.”

  She started to walk away, and I stopped her.

  “What do you mean an emergency?”

  “Well he's a doctor dear.”

  Her English was perfect, and so was the tone of disdain that I heard in it. I don't know what I had done to her, or why she was upset, but I wasn't going to push it. I was here as a guest after all and with everything that was going on, the conversation I just had with Craig, it didn't seem like a wise thing to rock the boat.

  “Okay. Thank you Lisbeth.”

  She walked away finally, and I was sure that she was thankful that she could get away from me. Was it something I said, something I had done? I had always been the type of person that wanted everybody to like me, and it used to bother me when somebody didn't. Especially if I didn't know why.

  I went back up to the bedroom because I didn't know what else to do with myself. I was in a strange country, and half the people in it didn't understand anything I said. I didn't understand anything they said either. I wanted to talk to Craig, tell him that I was sorry for my outburst earlier, but it is just taking me off guard. I know that women were the ones that weren’t supposed to think about all those things, but I didn't want to be a woman in his culture. I didn't want to stay home and just take care of the house, he already had a maid for that.

  Staying up for several hours reading, I finally went to sleep on the bed, but I didn't even get under the sheets. It felt strange to be there without him and after making a few calls on my cell phone, I finally went to bed. I was just hopeful that when I woke up, Craig would be there. Had I really upset him that much, or was it really something to do with work?

  From the way the woman was looking at me, I was starting to think that it was something else altogether. I mean, how much did I really know Craig?

  I woke up to Craig sitting on the side of the bed. I didn't know what time it was, but I knew it was late. It was dark outside now and I felt like I’d slept a full night.

  “How is your head feeling?”

  “Huh?”

  “Your head, remember?”

  “I think we both know that it wasn't a headache Craig. I just needed a few minutes. When I came back out of the bathroom, I heard the front door closed and you were gone.”

  “I told you that I might have to take care of some things while were here. I am always on call. There are things that I do here, that nobody else will do or can do. That means that I never really get to rest. I didn't mean to leave you though. Did Lisbeth tell you where I was?”

  I told him that she did, but there are still some things that I wanted a question and answer for. It just seemed shady all of a sudden, him taking off in the middle of the night. When I started to really look at him, I realized that he had red stuff all over his shirt. What sort of emergency had he had?

  It was one of those things that I wasn't sure about. I didn't know how to go forward because we hadn't really talked about his work that much. We had talked about it in context of the pharmaceutical side of it, and work, but I didn't know what it was he actually did. There were lots of different doctors, and I was starting to think that he was a different sort of doctor. I just wasn't sure what sort yet.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah of course, why would I be?”

  Well you have a lot of blood on your shirt Craig. Is everything okay with your patient?”

  He said that it was, but I could tell that he didn't like the fact that I had seen him bloody. I knew that it wasn't a knee sprain that he was going to be taking care of in the middle of the night, but I didn't know that he would be doing surgery either.

  “I'm going to go jump in the shower, I'll be out in a few minutes.”

  “Do you want me to come with you?”

  I tried to get him to look at me, so I told him that he was going to get what he wanted if he did. I didn't want him to be upset with me, and I knew that I should be able to get past this little argument with a few orgasms. It always helped me out when I needed some head clearing.

  “No, I will just be a minute. Go ahead and call Lisbeth and get us something to drink. There is a button in the corner. All you have to do is pull the cord.”

  He walked away before I could say anything else. I most likely would have told him that there was no way in hell that I was calling Lisbeth. She made it clear that the last thing she wanted from me was to have anything to do with me. Of course, she hadn’t said that, but she didn't need to. She was like me, and it was hard for her to control her face. For whatever reason, that woman did not like me and it made me wonder why. Why was it so confusing here?

  I knew that I was going to have to go find the drinks myself. It shouldn’t be that hard, I figured. It had to be somewhere around in the kitchen, right?

  I went back downstairs and tried to ignore the fact that he didn’t want me to go into the shower with him. Earlier today we couldn't keep our hands off of each other, and now something was between us and I really didn't like it at all. I didn't like the attention that I was feeling, knowing that the time we had together was so short. I really should have controlled myself better earlier, but he really had thrown me off. Of all the things that I expected him to say and do, talking about marriage and children wasn't one of them.

  The kitchen was set up unlike any of the ones I’d seen before and it took me a minute to figure it out. I really wanted to find the liquor bottles, so I didn’t have to call the woman that had dead black eyes for help. I knew that there was something more there, but it wasn’t the time or place for it. I wasn’t going to mention it to Craig, but I was going to wonder what was going on with the older woman.

  When I found a couple of bottles and a couple of glasses, I went back upstairs and waited for him to get out. I was nervous like the first time again and I was starting to think that maybe I’d m
ade a mistake. Maybe this was too soon, and I was going to have to cool down. We were talking love, but like Craig said, I should be thinking about things like that. He knew my body and my mind, but did he realize that I wasn’t ready to give up my job? That was my identity in a big way.

  As I saw Craig coming out, my mind stopped working. Maybe that was the problem. I simply couldn’t see past it all when he was near me or I was talking to him. It was like I just got tunnel vision and I wasn’t able to use my brain. It was hard to understand, but I was just going to have to work with it.

  He pulled his towel off and moved in front of me. He didn’t need to say a thing. I knew what he wanted and as I looked at his large meat, I realized that I needed it to.

  The rest of it, we could talk about another time. It was still going to be there in the morning. I didn’t want to argue anymore. I wanted back into his arms, where things made more sense.

  12

  Craig

  I was starting to think that everything was going to be okay again. Jeanine was curled up on her side and she hadn’t had too many questions and that was a good thing. With the way my life was going right now, less questions were better. I knew that I still had to come clean to Jeanine, but I still didn’t think she was ready for that. This was usually not how I was, I didn't worry about anything, but dealing with Jeanine was different. She wasn't from here and I could just stronger-arm her like I could someone else.

  She woke up after a few minutes of me looking at her and she smiled at me. My heart melted a little bit and again I wanted to give her a kiss and tell her good morning as my wife. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops, tell everyone, but I couldn't even tell her. So how could I tell anybody else?