My nails dug into his sweat slicked skin and I threw my head back, arching my body.
He buried his face in my hair and breathed out deeply, fast, shallow breaths consuming him.
Letting the aftershocks slowly quieten and disappear, I turned in his arms and held him, letting my hands trail over the planes of his taut abdomen.
In his arms, I lost track of time but I couldn’t care less. I knew who I was, and I belonged right here, with him. He drew me closer, removing all the space between us as our breathing returned to normal and my dizziness settled.
Eventually, when the engines roared back to life, we got up and got dressed. I didn’t want today to end, but I knew that he would do everything in his power to make sure we had a thousand days like it.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Ace
As we disembarked and walked down, I tried my hardest to ignore the massive crowd which had formed now. Despite the breathtaking afternoon we’d just shared, I hated how the anxiety returned.
Salvador was waiting down on the pier with a smile and a white bag that he gave to Illarion, with a quick smile he handed it to me. Shooting Illarion a questioning look, he simply smiled and thanked Salvador.
Glad that I pulled my cardigan back on before we got here, I cringed as dozens of eyes were on us, most wide with awe. Others narrowed with envy, mostly from women who kept staring me down. I rolled my eyes walking beside him.
He tightened his hold on me, throwing a possessive arm around my shoulder.
‘Still with me?’
‘There are a lot of people.’ I felt like I was on repeat.
‘Sorry,’ he said, quietly. ‘I should have warned you about that, maybe this wasn’t a good idea.’
‘No,’ I found his eyes. ‘It was perfect, I’m just… I’ll be alright. I need to get out more, it’s fine.’
He grazed a finger along my cheek with a smile.
‘Just focus on me. Only me.’
Ignoring the looks and chatters and the women giving me death stares, I did just that. I looked up into his eyes.
‘People here are usually more… tasteful. They’re just tourists.’
‘You always know what to say.’ I smiled.
He chuckled, keeping his eyes on mine as we walked, occasionally he looked away just to make sure we weren’t walking into a wall or something but for the most part, he kept his attention on me.
‘I only know what to say because it’s the truth.’
Once we’d reached the Hummer, and we were safely inside, he nodded at the bag in my lap.
‘Open it,’ he encouraged.
I smirked and reached in to the bag, sceptically. My fingers tightened around a medium sized, rectangular box. I slowly pulled it out of the bag and held it in my hand.
‘I had it made, when you came back but then… everything happened.’ A line in his jaw worked and then his hand was on mine. ‘I just wanted you to have something. From me.’
Slowly I opened it, and my breath caught for a moment. The black box held a white gold chain and, at the end, hung a delicate Celtic knot clasping a stunning diamond.
‘Traditionally, it represents what a lot of people believe to be the holy trinity, but others see it simply as the unity between mind, body and spirit,’ he said, softly. ‘You’ve gone through so much yet your mind is strong, your body endured, and your soul remains pure.’
Tears stung the back of my eyes, as the box grew heavy in my hand. I was speechless.
‘It’s too much,’ he said, quietly, shaking his head.
‘No,’ I replied. ‘It’s perfect.’
‘Really?’ He looked at me.
‘Yes, I love it, Ila.’
‘I’m glad,’ he smiled, pulling my hand into his.
It took a moment for my brain to communicate with my hands before I managed to take it out of the box.
‘Let me.’ He swept my hair off my shoulders and gently placed the chain around my neck letting it fall just above the curve of my collarbone. ‘I know you lost the one Troy gave you.’
My heart sunk, oh God, how could I have gone all this time and not once asked how he was? Jesus, I was a selfish jerk.
‘How is he?’
He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, caressing my cheek with his hand.
‘He took it hard, like we all did. I went to see him twice, to check in on him.’
‘Oh, Ila.’ I bowed my head.
‘When you’re up to it, we’ll go and see him.’
‘Thank you, for everything.’ I nodded, leaning across the console, pulling him against me.
Once I released him, he shifted the Hummer into drive and we left the beautiful coastal town and made our way back home.
‘How are you feeling?’ he asked, as we pulled up and around the driveway to his house.
‘So far so good.’ I shrugged, getting out with my little bag.
‘Later, if you’re up to it, I want to run through some ideas with you. Get a team ready.’
‘Whenever you need me, I’m good,’ I said, firmly.
‘I’ll get started.’ He smiled.
We parted ways at the foot of the stairs. He went left toward the main living area where we’d set up our makeshift Agency workstation and I went up, toward my room. As much as I enjoyed playing house and looking pretty, like a good little girl, it wasn’t me. Especially not now… not after what Dalca had turned me into. I desperately wanted to change and hit the gym.
Once I changed, I made my way to the bathroom, scrubbed off the makeup, and braided my hair. My eyes fell to the knot around my neck and I felt myself smile.
But as my attention went to my less than toned arms and thighs, I scoffed at myself. A gym session was definitely in order. I was eager to get back into shape and get some mass back on my spangly arms.
Before I made a move to leave, I felt it, in the pit of my stomach, rapidly creeping up on me. Not again. First, my mouth watered and then my vision dimmed. I rushed back to the bathroom and dropped to my knees above the toilet. Once again, I heaved, throwing up everything I’d managed to eat.
Tears rapidly formed, and I swatted them away with an angry force. At least Illarion wouldn’t have to know about the epic waste of a ten-thousand-dollar bottle of champagne, and a nice array of fruits that just went down the toilet. Literally.
I peeled myself away from the bowl and flung my braid back over my shoulder. Just as I was about to get up, a violent convulsion surprised me forcing me back to the ground. I threw my hands out in front of me, narrowly missing the basin. That could have been really, really bad.
Although I didn’t crack my head open, I did smash shoulder first into the wall before sliding down in a heap. I landed in a thud cradling my bruised shoulder.
Not even a minute had passed since my bathroom handed me my own ass that Illarion came rushing through the door. Great.
‘Ace?!’ he yelled, before he reached me.
When he finally spotted me, a moment of panic rushed through him and then it was replaced by amusement.
‘Yeah, yeah,’ I muttered, still sprawled out on the floor like a drunk college girl. ‘Help me up.’
He smirked and held his hand out.
‘What happened?’ he asked, smoothing my clothes down as I stood.
‘Ah you know, the usual, fell over my own feet.’
‘Were you sick again?’ he asked, leading me to my bed, throwing a quick glance around the bathroom.
I nodded, still nursing my shoulder.
‘How did you fall?’
The concern was back, guess he didn’t believe the whole “I’m clumsy, and I fell” spiel.
I looked across at him as he sat down beside me, he pulled my hand away and moved the strap from my top drawing in a sharp breath.
‘Ace. What happened?’
‘I felt sick,’ I said, simply.
‘And?’
‘And then there was a sharp pain and a convulsion-’
‘A seizure?’ His v
oice rose, two full octaves. ‘How long has that been happening?’
‘I don’t know….’ I peeled my eyes away from his. ‘A while.’
‘A while?’ He shook his head, incredulously. ‘Why wouldn’t you say anything?’
Being chastised by him was the world’s worst possible torture. I dragged my gaze away from his and sunk into myself. The disappointment in his eyes was bad enough, but the tone in his voice? That shattered me.
‘I’m sorry.’
‘Are you trying to get yourself killed?’ he asked, sharply.
‘What?’ I stammered. ‘No, why would you think that?’
‘You tell me. You don’t seem to care about your health, you’re keeping things like this from me, what else haven’t you told me about?’
‘Nothing!’ I spat turning from him.
‘I don’t believe this.’ He shook his head again, standing. ‘I’m calling a doctor.’
‘No, don’t, I don’t want to see anyone.’ My eyes flicked up and, in a moment of panic, I realized that I sounded like a child.
‘Having episodes like that can be due to a lot more serious issues. You’re seeing someone.’
There was no arguing with him. I guess I deserved that. I bowed my head pulling my ego down a few notches.
Several moments of silence passed before I felt the tension inside him shift and slowly dissipate. He let out a shaky breath and knelt, pressing his hand over mine, squeezing it gently until I turned my head toward him, giving him all my attention.
‘Please, Ace. For me.’
I wanted to argue but when he said that, it undid me.
‘It’s a waste of time.’ I got up and turned from him.
Shaking his head, he followed me, found the curve of my hip, and rested his hand on it.
‘It’s not a waste of time; it’ll give me peace of mind.’
‘Fine.’ I conceded, turning my head from him. Hating that he had so much power over me, especially when he used those eyes and sound logic.
He smiled at my pouting and pressed a soft kiss to my lips.
‘Will you call the doctor here?’
Brushing my cheek with his hand, he nodded. ‘I’ll call Donna. We can trust her.’
He had a hard time letting anyone in, and especially when it came to me. He was always guarded and overly cautious. Some called him paranoid. But he wouldn’t have entrusted my health to just anyone, Donna meant a lot to him. And I’d finally get to meet her.
‘Okay,’ I agreed, sitting back down on the foot of the bed. ‘Stay with me.’
‘I’ll stay as long as I can, but she’ll want to see you in private too.’
He left for a moment to make the call and when he returned, he sat back down beside me.
Suddenly anxious, I wrapped my arms around my chest. I didn’t like that. I didn’t think I could be alone with anyone. Especially someone I didn’t know. I’d seen her once, from afar, in my first month working for the Agency, but I didn’t know her.
He cupped my cheek in his hand, turning my face toward him.
‘Hey, I wouldn’t let her near you if I didn’t trust her.’ His eyes grew warmer. ‘You’ll like her.’
For the third time today, I agreed.
‘When will she get here?’
‘A few minutes. She was seeing another patient at the hospital down the road. She likes to help the patients who can’t afford to come to the hospital.’
Of course she did. I bet she wore tight skirts and heels at work, too like the doctors in lame tv shows.
‘It’s going to be okay,’ he said softly.
Maybe it was a good idea. Hopefully she’d be able to sort out these issues, feeling hungry all the time but not being able to hold food down for the most part was getting hard. And to add to it, these convulsions were getting crazy.
A small knock on the door drew my attention, but Illarion’s eyes remained focused on me. Elsa had walked her up here, she was probably well acquainted with Illarion’s old friend.
‘She’s here,’ he said, softly, brushing my cheek with his thumb. ‘It’ll be alright, I promise.’
I swallowed back the nerves and got up, waiting, as Illarion went to the door, letting her in.
Her eyes found mine and then went back to Illarion’s. She was stunning, just like the first time I saw her. She was tall, much taller than me, which wasn’t a great feat but she was graceful as she walked with her head held high. Her vibrant blue eyes didn’t miss a thing as they landed on my heavily clothed body in a room which was at least seventy-five degrees.
‘Ace, this is Donna,’ he said, officially introducing us for the first time.
He stood by the door as Donna stepped closer to me with a wide smile, hand outstretched.
She was everything that used to make me hate the way I looked in high school. She was one of those pretty girls whom everyone loved and, to top it off, she was smart; she was a freaking doctor, and not just that, she was a surgeon. She was probably the same age as Illarion. Her bright, blue eyes were framed by dark, blonde lashes and a thick framed, designer pair of glasses. Her light purple blouse sat just above her hips, tucked neatly into a pair of black, high-waist, suit pants that cropped just at her ankles revealing a stunning pair of sky-high, nude pumps. My heart ached. God those shoes were incredible.
‘Nice to finally meet you,’ she said, softly.
‘You too.’
I saw what Illarion meant when he said I’d like her. I immediately did. She was kind and genuine. Inside her there was nothing but good. She was a pure and decent person, and if he trusted her, she must have been an incredible woman.
He caught my eye from by the door. “Do you want me to stay?”
“No, you were right, it’s fine.”
He smiled in response before leaving and closing the door.
I brought my attention back to Donna; she was unpacking her equipment, setting up at the small table. She neatly placed her Prada handbag by the foot of my bed and turned to me.
‘Have a seat,’ she said, softly.
Sitting down, I looked up at her.
‘You can take your sweater off.’
Feeling a lot less comfortable now, I did as she asked and instinctively wrapped my arms over my skin as much as I could.
She pulled the chair over to me and sat down. Her vibrant blue eyes found mine.
‘Let’s take a look.’
She gently took one of my hands and drew my arm to her. She turned it in her hand, running her fingers along the marks, examining the depth of the cuts and the bruises along the injection sites.
‘They’re healing on their own, which is good, but I’ll give you some cream to keep the skin soft, it’ll minimise scarring.’
‘Thank you.’ I nodded.
She smiled, looking up at me through her wide rimmed glasses.
‘Tell me about how you’ve been feeling.’
‘Sick, always nauseated,’ I rubbed my head and turned to her. ‘I start to think I’m getting better, but it always comes back.’
‘Any times you remember it being at its worst?’
‘It’s always there, but mostly when I eat, I can’t hold anything down and the convulsions are always unexpected.’
She looked at me thoughtfully. ‘Those are common effects when coming off such potent drugs, but the convulsions are concerning.’
‘I know.’ I rubbed my face.
‘I’m sorry for what you went through.’
‘Yeah.’ My mind trailed off.
Daniel was quite private and I know he wouldn’t have just opened up about what went on, and Illarion, well he definitely wouldn’t have breathed a word without speaking to me first. Had they both told her what went on? Somehow, I doubted it.
She handed me a pack of tablets.
‘They’re stronger than what Daniel gave you. They’ll help you fight the nausea.’
She pulled out a small torch, bringing my attention back to her. She turned it on and instructed me to follow
the light with her eyes.
‘Now the convulsions, depending on the cause, should ease on their own.’
‘If they don’t?’ I asked, conscious of the very real possibility that the damage was permanent.
‘There are medications, but I’d ideally run tests and scans, see what we’re working with.’
I nodded, blinking back the tears that formed from the light.
‘I’ll take some blood, run a quick test here. If that comes up clear, we’ll stick to waiting them out. I don’t really want to give you too much medication. I don’t think your liver can take it if I’m completely honest.’
Again, I nodded. She drew a vial of blood and I was sick at the thought that I didn’t even flinch anymore when it came to needles. My heart rate even spiked a little, in some sort of sick anticipation. I swallowed that thought back and looked up at her when she was done.
‘It was you…,’ I said, looking up at her.
A questioning gaze found me.
‘You did it,’ I smiled, weakly. ‘You were the one who had to tell Illarion.’
She bowed her head. ‘Yes. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.’ She pressed her hand to my arm. ‘Lie down, I’ll check the bruising.’
I obliged, and she lifted the hem of my tank top up. ‘They’ve all seemed to heal well, that’s good, there doesn’t appear to be any internal bleeding.’
I sat up and pulled my sweater back on as soon as she was done,
‘Illarion was always quiet,’ she explained, softly, sitting down in the chair. ‘He never really smiled much and then, eventually, I noticed a change. He would laugh more, he’d smile. Whenever I asked him about it, he refused to tell me. He always said he’d have to kill me if he told me.’ She laughed softly bringing a smile to my face. ‘Eventually, on one of our coffee dates he told me about you, that he was assigned to watch a young soldier in Iraq.’
Her words sunk deep into me. Hearing about him like this from someone else was so different, I felt like I was learning about him, things he’d never tell me. Things that were tied to his past and held down by a weight that could never be shifted.
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