The Lies I've Told: A By The Bay Stand-Alone Novel

by J. L. Berg

  I glanced up to see her standing next to me, Ruby snuggling up to her chest in one of those infant carrier devices that always baffled me.

  Molly’s mouth hung open until she finally turned. “I do not—that’s not why I’m here.”

  I made a sound of disbelief that closely resembled something I’d heard Ruby make the other day when spitting up milk.

  “Well, at least I don’t sit here all day, swooning over my boyfriend.”

  “I’m not swooning,” I answered.

  “Oh, so you’re not sitting here staring at him while he…” She glanced out toward the shed. “Hey, where’d he go?”

  I put my pencil down, a little put off that my sister hadn’t noticed any of the work I had spread out in front of me. “Didn’t you hear?”

  “Hear what? Oh my gosh, he didn’t leave, did he? If he did, I swear to God, I will track him down and—”

  Crossing my arms in front of my chest, I turned. “He didn’t leave.”

  “Oh,” she simply said. “Well, that’s good because I don’t think I’m in my best fighting condition yet after giving birth.” Pink tinted her cheeks, showing her embarrassment.

  “It’s good to know you’ve grown confident in Aiden’s and my relationship though.”

  “I have!” she argued as I pivoted away, readying to gather up my stuff. “Millie, I’m sorry. I just—maybe it’s a knee-jerk reaction.”

  “Why? Because I’m not worth hanging around for?”

  “No,” she answered. Her hand touched my arm, pulling me back toward her. “Because I wasn’t.”

  I let out a deep sigh.

  Now, it was me who felt like a jerk.

  Jake and Molly had been high school sweethearts until one day, after the devastating death of his mother, Jake walked away.

  From his family, his hometown, and most importantly, Molly.

  “I thought you were over all that.”

  Her eyes rounded with warmth. “I am,” she said. “Well, ninety-nine-point-nine percent of me is, but there will always be the tiniest sliver of doubt.”

  Doubt.

  The word resonated with me so much. Ever since I’d gazed down at that valid driver’s license, a tiny piece of mistrust had been lodged in my heart.

  “How do you ignore it?” I asked.

  “That’s just it; you can’t. By ignoring it, you allow that doubt to grow and fester inside you.”

  “So, you face it head-on,” I said. “Why am I not surprised? Is there anything you’re bad at?”

  She smiled, ignoring my question. “Jake and I talk about it sometimes, yes. It helps reassure me that he’s not going to up and leave again.”

  “If he did, I’d be the one running after him to kick some ass.”

  Her smile widened. “I wouldn’t expect any less. Now, what is this news I didn’t hear?”

  “Oh.” My gaze turned to the shed. “Daddy and Aiden hit it off so well after their talk at the party the other day that, apparently, he’s become kind of an apprentice to Aiden.”

  “You’re kidding.”

  “I really wish I were,” I said.

  “Our father, the one who has basically made napping in hammocks a full-time profession?” She laughed.

  “Don’t forget golfing. That man loves his time in Myrtle Beach.”

  “Right,” she agreed. “How could I forget? So, where are they?”

  “Well, that’s the other part of the news. Daddy felt bad that Aiden had been working so long out in the sun.”

  “Meaning Daddy didn’t want to work out in the sun himself.” Molly laughed.

  “That’s probably more accurate. Anyway, he went out and bought an air-conditioning unit for the shed—one of those window units—and put it in himself, so they’d have somewhere to rest because, up until now, Aiden would just sit out in the shade, refusing to come inside because of all the dust. So, now, the shed is like their little man cave.”

  “Well, I’ll be damned.”

  “That was pretty much my reaction as well,” I said, leaning back in the seat.

  “Does it bother you that your boyfriend and Dad are so chummy?”

  I thought about it for a moment, picturing Aiden as a little boy with no family to speak of for so long. “No,” I finally answered. “Aiden doesn’t have a father; he never did. He’s more than welcome to share mine. That is, if it’s okay with you.”

  Looking up at her, I saw a warm smile spread across her face.

  “Perfectly okay,” she replied. “Now, what is all this?” she asked, pointing to the sketches I’d been working on all morning.

  It was about time she noticed.

  “Oh, just some ideas I’ve been playing with,” I said, waving my hand in front of me like I didn’t care that she’d taken a whole ten minutes to ask.

  In reality, I was dying to show them off.

  She reached for one of my favorites, a long maxi-style dress with cutout detailing on the sides and a stunning back. “This is gorgeous,” she said. “Very beachy. Is that what you were going for?”

  My eyes drifted to the view in front of me. “I guess I was just inspired by my surroundings.”

  “It reminds me of that dress—do you remember the one I’m talking about?”

  “My homecoming dress?”

  She nodded. “I still have it. It was hanging in the closet in our room for the longest time, and I found it when I went to clean it out before Cora and Lizzie used the rooms last year. It’s hanging in my closet now, if you ever want to try it on again.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Oh, please, like it’d even fit.”

  She gave me a hard stare. “Don’t even, little sister. Your figure hasn’t budged an inch since high school. Don’t ask me how, considering the crap you eat, but I’m quite certain that dress would look just as good on you now as it did back then.”

  “Hmm, I would like to take it down to Rita’s shop and show it to her before she closes up, for old time’s sake. When I was down there a few weeks ago, she mentioned it. It would be kind of fun to even give it to her as a going-away present.”

  “She would love that. You were always her favorite, growing up.”

  “I know,” I said, looking down at my sketches. “She tried to get me to work in the store on several occasions, but I was terrified of getting tied down. I didn’t want anything standing in the way of my exit strategy.”

  Molly simply rolled her eyes, but then something changed. Like a lightbulb flipping on inside her head. “What if you bought the store?”

  My brows furrowed and I wondered if, instead of a lightbulb turning on, it had actually exploded instead.

  “Say what now?”

  She turned, pulled up a chair, and sat down next to me. I guess this was going to be a deep conversation.

  “Hear me out, okay? You’re unemployed, right?”

  “Yep, thanks for pointing that out again. By the way, why hasn’t Mom or Dad said anything about the fact that I’ve been home for weeks without any plans to go back to Florida?”

  My sister’s face turned red.

  “You told them, didn’t you?”

  “Maybe. But don’t be—”

  “Honestly, I don’t even care. I mean, what was I going to do? Keep lying? One can only have so much vacation saved up. But please tell me you at least kept the part about my boss to yourself?”

  “Yes. Oh God, yes. Mom and Dad do not need to know about you boinking your boss. Dad would have a heart attack for sure.”

  I made a sour face. “Could you please refrain from using the word boink around my niece? Or anyone. Gross.”

  She laughed. “Anyway, back to the store. I heard from someone in town that she still doesn’t have a buyer, which means the store will be empty after she leaves in September. It’s a perfect situation.”

  “For what?” I asked, feeling butterflies beginning to flutter in my stomach. I didn’t like where my sister was headed with this.

  “For you to take over, silly! Or total
ly start anew. Sell your own designs!”

  “Do you have any idea how long it takes to create an entire line of clothing, let alone get it into production?”

  “No,” she said. “I really don’t have a clue, but I’m sure you do. I’m sure you have all the skills, Millie.”

  She looked at me, really looked at me, with those bright blue eyes that matched my own.

  “This is crazy,” I said. “I don’t even know if I want to move back to Ocracoke.” My gaze drifted to the shed.

  To Aiden.

  There were too many unanswered questions to begin with. His life was in New York.

  But, for the meantime, he was here.

  Would he stay after the memorial was completed?

  There was that doubt again.

  I guessed it was time to face it head-on.

  Turning to my sister, I said, “Let’s go get that dress.”

  Her eyes brightened. “Does that mean…”

  I shrugged, but I couldn’t hide the small bit of glee that escaped as I rose from the chair.

  My own store.

  My own line of clothing.

  Yeah, it was a pipe dream, but it was mine.

  And damn if it wasn’t about time I started having those again.

  By the time we made it to the store, I was leaking sweat out of every pore on my body. I’d never purchased anything like this before in my life.

  Unless you counted my apartment.

  Oh crap, my apartment.

  I’d probably have to sell that now that I was moving.

  Moving…

  Was I actually moving?

  So. Much. Sweat.

  Even the idea had my heart galloping to an unknown destination in my chest.

  “Are you nervous?” Molly asked as we walked up to Beachcombers.

  “Yes,” I managed to say.

  “Excited?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you hate me for suggesting the idea?”

  We both stopped at the entrance as I tried to steady my breath.

  “A little,” I answered. “But, more than that, I’m disappointed with myself for not thinking of it. I’ve spent too long working on other people’s dreams and ambitions; I’ve kind of forgotten what it’s like to have my own. I kept rising through the ranks at my company, believing that was enough, but really, I was just moving further and further away from what I wanted. I mean, this is why I wanted to go into design in the first place.” A memory flickered back to the forefront of my mind. “I think I told Aiden that.”

  “You think? Is that part of the whole drunken night coming back at you?”

  “Yeah.” I smiled, happy I’d shared it with him. Apparently, I was more honest with him drunk than I was with myself sober.

  “Well, let’s see if we can get you one giant step closer to those dreams of yours, shall we?”

  With my gorgeous hand-sewn masterpiece of a homecoming dress in my arms, the one that had started it all, we stepped into Rita’s shop.

  “Yes. Let’s.”

  “Two McIntyre girls at once!” Rita exclaimed the moment she saw us enter. “Well, isn’t it my lucky day? And is that a little angel sleeping on your chest, Miss Molly?”

  “It is,” she said, looking down at Ruby, who had been fed just before we left Molly’s house after picking up the dress.

  I swore, that infant slept more than she was awake.

  But I guessed it was hard work, growing that fast.

  I remained relatively quiet while Rita fussed over Ruby, and the two moms talked babies for a few minutes.

  “It’s amazing how quickly they grow,” she said. “Soon, little Ruby will be starting kindergarten, and then, before you know it, she’ll be off to college. Heck, I remember the two of you coming in here, shopping for clothes, like it was yesterday.”

  This was it.

  My moment.

  “Actually, that’s why we came in,” I said, stepping forward, the dress still at my side as my heart raced in my chest.

  “Oh? You need something? I’m afraid I don’t have a lot in stock. I’ve put mostly everything on clearance, trying to sell off what I have before I close in a month.”

  A month? That was really soon.

  I gulped down the dread.

  “No, well, actually, I might take a look around, but that’s not why we came in. I wanted to show you this,” I said, holding out the dress. “And to make you a proposition.”

  Okay, I said to myself, letting out one last breath, here goes nothing.

  “Why isn’t this town bigger?” I asked as my sister drove us back to the inn.

  “Um, well, it’s an island. It can only be but so big. And why are you asking?”

  I didn’t think I’d blinked since we left the store, the whole of Ocracoke passing me in a blur. “Because I need more time to process this. I just bought a store, Molly.”

  “Well, not quite. You have a contract, but there is still the matter of money. You’ll need to apply for a loan—”

  “I have the money,” I said.

  “You what?” She nearly drove off the road.

  I nodded, my eyes still wide and scary-looking. “I have the money. I’ve been working my ass off since college. With the exception of my apartment, which I’m going to sell, I’ve hardly spent any of the money I’ve made over the years, and I’ve made a lot of it.”

  “But your clothes… and the shoes?”

  I shrugged. “Most of it I got as swag from shows or as just a perk of my job.”

  “That’s a nice perk.”

  “Yeah, it was. But not as nice as owning my own store,” I finally said, a sly smile creeping up my cheeks.

  “So, it’s starting to process?” she asked.

  “Yeah, I think so.”

  “Good, because we’re home.”

  I looked up at the inn and let out a happy sigh. “I bought a store today, Molly.”

  My hands were clinging to the preliminary paperwork Rita and I had signed, which the realtor had brought over after I shared my plans with Rita. I looked down at them to make sure they were still there.

  Still real.

  “You once told me everyone needed a little bit of nomadic time in their lives, where they could wander and explore and truly find themselves. It’s that advice that pushed me to finally step off this island and discover who I was without Jake. And it’s that advice that ultimately gave me the courage to find the path that led back to him. Are you sure your nomadic days are behind you?”

  Looking up at our childhood home, remembering all the crazy moments we’d shared within, I smiled. “Who said you always had to be a nomad to find yourself? Mom and Dad raised us in this unconventional inn, surrounded by strangers, and yet we had a perfectly normal upbringing. Maybe I, the one who couldn’t wait to leave, am supposed to come home to find myself.”

  “It sure would be poetic, wouldn’t it?”

  “Yeah”—I laughed—“it would. Plus, this island could use some style.”

  She grinned. “It really could, and I know I, for one, would really appreciate not having to get on a ferry every time I wanted something cute to wear on a date. Do you think you could do something about that?”

  I gave her a once-over. “You’ve always been a work in progress, haven’t you?”

  Her eyes widened just before we both stepped out of the car. “I thought my sense of fashion had greatly improved over the last few years!”

  “We’ll keep working on it. I’m here now; don’t worry.”

  I was pretty sure I heard her mutter something under her breath as she said good-bye and hopped back in the car. Since I’d called her out on her coming over to see how Mom was handling the inn, she knew her plans had been ruined.

  I had known maternity leave was going to be hard on my sister, but this was downright ridiculous. Taking a quick look around the street and parking area, I noticed neither of my parents’ cars was around, which meant Aiden was alone.

  Finally.

&
nbsp; I wanted to go straight to the backyard and tell him all about my day, but I felt like a mess, and I was in desperate need of a shower after the stressful afternoon I’d had. So, rather than heading for the patio, I went toward our suite, loving the fact that it was now ours.

  I hadn’t been in the other room in weeks.

  Unlocking the door, I set down the papers on the dresser and breathed out a content sigh. Seeing all of our things commingling together in this room filled my heart with joy. It was messy and small, but I didn’t care.

  I could spend the rest of my life crammed with this man in the tiny, little suite.

  And it’d be the happiest life I could imagine.

  Of course, I just spent my life savings on a storefront in a town dependent on tourists, so who knows? I might need to live here the rest of my life, surviving off the kindness of my family.

  But it could always be worse.

  I could be forced to move in with Molly and Jake… or my parents.

  A very real shudder went down my spine.

  God, I hoped this dream of mine worked out.

  Trying to keep a positive outlook on things, I stripped off my clothes and jumped in the shower, eager to go see Aiden. It had been a few days since I was outside and really took an up-close look at the progress he’d made on the memorial project.

  Now that he’d been working on it for several weeks, I was starting to see the progress of it, but it was slow work. I now understood where the need for patience came from. I’d given him a hard time about M&M’s and such, but the work he created was beautiful.

  After my shower, it didn’t take much longer to get ready. I threw on a cute dress and a bit of makeup, and with one last look at the contract I’d left on the dresser, I stepped out of our messy suite to go share the news with my man.

  And I hoped he’d share in my dreams because there was no one else in the world I wanted to have by my side in this crazy, new adventure but him.

  Arching my back, I stretched my sore muscles, feeling the hours of work I’d put my body through today. Glancing up at the granite boulder I was slowly molding into the vision I’d created in my head, I felt a sense of satisfaction, knowing it was heading in the right direction.