Baby, It's Cold Outside

by Cathy Yardley

  “Why so far away, is what I want to know,” Ava carped. “When he’s got family and comfort and…and home right here.”

  Emily bit her lip. “Maybe he’s looking for something else,” she ventured, wondering herself why he hated Tall Pines so much. Sure, it was a little town. And quirky. And it had a lot of traditions. And, yeah, it really was pretty knee-jerk about any sort of change.

  Okay. Maybe she could see why someone who loved living larger than life might not be so keen on Tall Pines. And he definitely lived on a larger scale, no doubt about it. Even as a teen, the town hadn’t been big enough to contain him. The sheer artistry of his elaborate pranks alone had bordered on creative genius. When he’d won a full scholarship to architectural school, the townsfolk had been shocked.

  Not Emily. Colin had been destined for great things and had planned to leave Tall Pines if he’d had to shoot himself out on a rocket.

  “Something better than this?” Ava asked, astounded. “What else is there?”

  Before Emily could answer, Colin walked up, a glass of punch in one hand and a scowl on his face. “I got a Chia Pet.” He held up a small clay figurine that looked like a sheep.

  “Nice,” Emily observed, tongue-in-cheek.

  He ran his tongue along his teeth, amused. “It was this or some kind of Super Orgasm hot chocolate. From the reverend, if you can believe it.”

  Emily giggled. “Imagine going to Paris and leaving all this behind.”

  He grinned reluctantly. Ava pounced on the expression. “See? I told you this would be fun!”

  Instantly the grin slid from his face like a blackboard being erased. “Mom…”

  “I know, I know,” she grumbled. But she didn’t look deterred.

  “Your mother was thanking Emily for putting you up over at the hotel,” Harry Reese said quickly, eager to patch over the awkward break.

  Emily blushed. “It’s my job.”

  “Well, you do your job well,” Harry said. It might have been the longest conversation she’d ever had with the man with Ava present. “Everyone knows that the hotel is one of the best things to happen to Tall Pines. We don’t know what we’d do without you.”

  Emily had been trying hard not to stare at Colin—and equally hard not to look as if she were trying hard not to stare. Harry’s comment surprised her. “Well, I doubt you’ll ever have to find out. I imagine I won’t be going anywhere.”

  “Naturally you wouldn’t, dear,” Ava clucked. “You’re the last Stanfield. Where would you go?”

  Emily sneaked a look at Colin. The scowl was back in full force. “So, Colin…”

  “I’m getting some more punch,” he said, sounding truculent. “Then I think I’ll walk over to the hotel.”

  “Are you all right, dear?”

  “I have a headache.” He turned and walked toward the refreshment table.

  Ava huffed impatiently. “He really needs to loosen up more,” she observed to her husband. The two of them went off to dance.

  Emily waited, then followed Colin to the table. Sidling up next to him, careful not to stand too close, she whispered, “Wait till you see what I got from the gift exchange. It’s a lot better than a Chia Pet.”

  “Listen, I have to get out of here.”

  She’d been expecting some playful banter, and his serious tone gave her pause. “You okay?”

  “Holiday hangover,” he said bitterly. “I’m leaving.”

  Emily frowned. His tone sounded…final. “Are you going to be in my apartment when I get back?” she asked in a soft voice.

  He finally looked at her, and his eyes seemed haunted. “Honestly,” he replied in an equally soft voice, “I don’t know.”

  With that, he walked away. All she could do was watch him, wondering what had caused the abrupt change…and feeling bereft. Of all the ways for their brief affair to end, this was one she had not anticipated.

  WALKING IN THE CRISP, snow-covered landscape, Colin felt like ten kinds of an idiot. There was something about the very air in Tall Pines that seemed to bring out the prime jackass in him, and this vacation was obviously no exception. He had no excuse—and really no idea why he kept succumbing to the bad humors that plagued him whenever he set foot in the city limits, but there it was.

  The gift exchange had been sort of fun, and he’d spent some more time with his family without getting into the vicious downward cycle of “Why won’t you move home?” He’d been holding up rather well. But when his mother pointed out that Emily would never leave Tall Pines, and Emily had readily and without any thought agreed, he’d suddenly felt a sharp and unbelievable sense of loss—all the sharper because it was so unexpected.Apparently his subconscious had been working overtime, subversively contemplating a future with Emily Stanfield, even though everything between them had been sexual and deliberately temporary. Even though he’d warned himself not to get involved because to even begin to consider it was the ultimate foolishness.

  He lifted his face to the slate-colored sky. It wasn’t snowing right at the moment, but the wind was chill and biting, scraping at his cheeks over the edges of his scarf.

  “What are you doing out here?”

  He looked over his shoulder and saw Emily walking after him. She’d removed the silly paper hat she’d been wearing at the Otter Lodge and now was bundled up in a black leather jacket, a thick black wool hat and matching scarf. Her black leather gloves completed the ensemble.

  She looked less like a schoolteacher and more like a hit woman, and he watched her approach with equal dread.

  “You can’t honestly expect to drop a bomb like that on me and walk away,” she said, her voice colder than the wind whipping through the town square.

  “You shouldn’t be out here,” he dodged, stuffing his hands into his coat pockets. “People might see us together, make some assumptions.”

  “I don’t give a damn,” she retorted cavalierly, but all the same, he noticed her glancing around. Almost everyone was either still in the Otter Lodge partying or in their houses, safely tucked away from the cold. “We need to talk.”

  He let out an annoyed huff that came out as a puff of steam. “I shouldn’t have stalked off like that,” he conceded.

  “You think?” Her eyes pierced him like arrows. “I know we’re just having a little fling here, but I do think I expected more than a sudden and inexplicable mood swing, starting with you getting pissy and ending with you telling me that I might not ever see you again.”

  He winced. He had done that, hadn’t he?

  “What is your problem, Reese?” she said sharply. “I swear, you act like Tall Pines is Alcatraz and you’re building a tunnel. I know you’ve been all over the world and love your glamorous women, your traveling, your parties and your high life, but what exactly is so damned wrong with living in a small town?”

  “Nothing, okay?” Colin barked back, feeling cornered. “There is nothing wrong with living in Tall Pines. It’s beautiful. The people are nice. They’re concerned about each other. When something happens to one person, everyone knows about it.”

  “So that’s the big deal?” she pressed. “You don’t like the fact that we’ve got nosy neighbors? That they can be invasive?”

  He rubbed at his eyes, the chill of his own leather gloves dulled by the numbness of his face. “It’s not that.”

  “So what is it?” She crossed her arms like an impatient and demanding goddess.

  “It’s not Tall Pines. It’s me.”

  She stared at him, looking confused.

  “It’s perfect here,” he said. “It’s beautiful. It’s what everybody always wanted—ideal, pristine. People care. It’s home.”

  Emily still stared, silent.

  “And I never wanted it,” he said. “I never, ever fit in here. And I felt like an outcast and a loser for not wanting it.”

  Her expression softened slightly. “Colin…”

  “No, let me finish.” He gritted his teeth. “When I was in high school, I didn’t ha
ve many friends. But the few friends I did have formed a sort of club. We called it the Escape Committee.”

  She smiled.

  “We were so eager to get out of Tall Pines it was almost stupid,” he continued. “And we all did get out. I got in trouble a lot, sure, but I always got good grades. Not because I necessarily loved school, but every day I was here I felt more miserable and I knew college was a ticket out.”

  Colin couldn’t look at her, couldn’t stand seeing the sympathy shining on her face when he knew there really wasn’t any way she could understand. Cold seeped into his bones that had nothing to do with the weather.

  “This probably all sounds ridiculous and melodramatic,” he said, kicking at a snowdrift with his foot. “But every time I’m home and someone points out to me how wonderful it is here and asks why I don’t want to live here, I suddenly seem to revert to being eighteen years old and feeling like a complete and utter freak.”

  “Colin.” She reached out, putting a gloved hand on his shoulder.

  He didn’t shrug the comforting touch off, but he didn’t step closer to her, either. “So that’s my story,” he said bitterly. “Stupid, huh?”

  “Small-town life is not for everybody,” she said. “Just because people here think it’s perfect doesn’t mean it is.”

  He shrugged, feeling juvenile—and yet still hurting. “Don’t you think it’s perfect?” he couldn’t help asking.

  She laughed. “Hardly. Everybody here lives in each other’s pockets. If I sneeze when I get out of bed in the morning, Hank Salvatore over at the post office usually sends over some vitamin C with my mail, you know?”

  He smiled reluctantly.

  “And there’s always the petty bickering. It’s more like being part of a really big family.” She shrugged. “It’s not perfect, but it’s home.”

  “That’s the thing,” he said. “I don’t feel like it’s home.”

  She stood next to him, silent, for a moment. Then she said, “That’s what you’re looking for, isn’t it? That’s why you move around so much.” Emily paused. “You’re looking for home.”

  He didn’t say anything. He was surprised by her observation—the fact that she’d figured it out and the fact that he never had.

  Without glancing around to see if they were being observed, she reached forward and hugged him. Even though her mere proximity tended to bring out a sexual zing, this felt warm…comforting.

  Cozy.

  He took her proffered warmth, holding her tightly to him.

  “I hope you find what you’re looking for,” she whispered against his ear.

  He held tighter for a moment before letting her go. “Let’s head back to the hotel. I’m freezing off various parts of my anatomy that I know you’ve expressed an appreciation for.”

  She chuckled softly, falling into step next to him, tromping through the thick snow.

  As they walked, Colin found himself still drifting in contemplation. “I have to ask,” he finally said. “What makes this home for you? How do you feel living here?”

  She blinked. “I don’t know. I’ve never really thought about it.”

  “You love the traditions,” he prompted, feeling a weight start to bear down on his chest. “You love the community.”

  “Some of the traditions, most of the people,” she said with a wry smile. “It’s a nice town.”

  But there was something there—some hesitation. He didn’t want to pry. Oh, hell, yes, he did. He wanted to understand what bound her there.

  He didn’t want to think about why he wanted to understand.

  “I guess the more I lived here, the harder it seemed to picture living anywhere else,” she admitted.

  That wasn’t enthusiasm, he thought, with a creeping feeling of triumph, that was simply inertia.

  “So,” he asked casually, “maybe you’d be happy living somewhere else?”

  “I don’t know.” Now she sounded troubled around the edges of her voice. “Still, what are the odds of my moving?”

  They got to the hotel, and Phillip the night manager was there, shoveling the steps. He saw the two of them and smirked knowingly.

  “Hey, Phillip,” Emily said, either not noticing or ignoring his smugness. “How are things going?”

  “The roads are clear,” he informed them. “The sheriff dropped by with the latest news. Most of the strays have already gotten into their cars and left.” He glared pointedly at Colin, as if to say, So what are you waiting for?

  Emily and Colin walked into the hotel, going to the elevator and heading for her apartment on the top floor. Emily didn’t say a word, but Colin knew what she was thinking.

  “I don’t have to be in Paris until after the new year,” he said carefully. “That’s a whole two days away. If you don’t mind putting me up until then?”

  She smiled. “No,” she said quietly. “Two more days would suit me just fine.”

  With that, she finally kissed him, the heat of her mouth a jarring counterpoint to the cold of his skin. His blood pumped hot and fierce.

  Two more days. Two more nights.

  How am I going to leave her when the new year’s over?

  6

  IT WAS THE LAST night of the year and the last night she’d be able to spend with Colin. And yet here she was dressing up to go out on a date with Mayor Tim.

  Emily suspected that might be ironic somehow. It certainly felt like irony—going out on a date with the man whom it made the most sense to marry before indulging in one last night of ecstasy with the man least likely to be a husband.She slipped on diamond earrings, checking her makeup in the mirror. Her black long-sleeved dress had a plunging back, looking both elegant and sexy, depending on where you stood. She’d bought it months ago, long before she’d even seen Colin. Or agreed to a date with Tim, for that matter.

  She walked out into the living room. Colin was sitting on her couch, looking irritated.

  “I suppose it would be selfish of me to ask you to cancel,” he said, his voice detached.

  “I have to go,” she said. “Stanfields always go to the Holiday Ball. It’s tradition.”

  It felt like an excuse. Probably because it was.

  “But do they always go with the single, eligible mayor that everyone is trying to marry off?”

  The sourness of his tone made her survey him with a quirked eyebrow. “That didn’t sound selfish. That sounded jealous.”

  He grimaced. “You’re right. I guess I am jealous.”

  Even as part of her heart thrilled at that admission, she crossed her arms, mentally schooling herself not to read into the statement. What’s he going to do? Stay here forever?

  Still, the hungry, sad look in his eye melted her heart, and she went over to him, putting her arms around him.

  “I can promise you it’ll be an early night. This isn’t a real date, it doesn’t mean anything. He won’t even get to first base.”

  His hand tickled down her bare back, sending a shiver skittering over her nerve endings. “With a dress like this, I’m sure he’ll try.”

  “It’s not like that between Tim and me,” she said, forcing herself not to curl like a cat against his palm. If she did, she might never get out of here. “It’s…I don’t know…like we’re brother and sister.”

  “I never wanted to ask my sister out on a date.”

  She leaned back, feeling irritation warring with desire. “I want you, you know that.”

  He smiled, warming up. “And I want you.”

  “But after tonight you’re going,” she said quietly. “Remember?”

  He fell silent.

  “I have to live here. More importantly, I’m going to have a life here—without you. I don’t know what it is we’ve got going between us, but whatever it is ends tomorrow. I can promise you I don’t sleep around easily and I would never sleep with anyone else while I’m sleeping with you. But I do have to plan for life after you leave.”

  “And Tim is part of this plan, is he?”

/>   “I don’t know,” she answered honestly.

  “You said he was like your brother.” Colin sounded puzzled. “How could you be happy with a life like that? Without passion?”

  She stared into his eyes, willing him to understand. “I don’t know if I can be. But if the alternative is living alone, waiting for some grand love affair that never shows up—or one who lives thousands of miles away,” she said pointedly, “then maybe I can settle for a good lifelong friendship that might shift into something more comfortable.”

  He looked at her, shaking his head. “That’s the other thing I can’t stand about this town,” he muttered. “You’re all against taking risks.”

  Emily didn’t like the way he was suddenly lumping her in with all the things he didn’t like about Tall Pines. She stood up, slipping on her high heels with sharp, jerky motions.

  “I took a risk with you,” she finally retorted.

  “Not enough to let anybody know about us.”

  “Know what about us?” Her voice had raised, and she clamped down on her anger before their disagreement could explode into a full-blown fight. Which, considering she rarely fought with anyone and they weren’t even in a relationship, was sort of shocking in and of itself. “Know that I’ve slept with you without even a date? Know that I was desperate enough to have a fling with a man who can’t seem to leave this place fast enough and wouldn’t move back with a gun to his head?”

  She tossed a lipstick and her keys into a small clutch purse. “You tell me, Colin. Exactly how should I have advertised whatever ‘we’ seem to have?”

  He walked up behind her, tugging her into his arms. She resisted, anger still burning through her, underscored by humiliation.

  My father would be so ashamed of me.

  She closed her eyes against the pain of that observation.

  Colin was insistent, though, finally holding her in a careful embrace. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I’m sorry. You’re absolutely right. I’ve got no reason whatsoever to be jealous or to take it out on you. I’m sorry.”

  She didn’t say anything. Instead she leaned her head against his shoulder.