Three Women

by Marita Conlon-McKenna

  ‘When are you moving over?’ Erin asked as she brushed her hair.

  ‘I’m not,’ said Michelle. ‘I’ve no plans for going to London any time soon. If Ronan wants to see me, he’s the one going to have to come home here on Friday nights. I’m working in PWC and have to finish my accountancy exams. I’m contracted to them for another year and a half at least. What about you?’

  ‘I’ve got a job I don’t really want to leave and a few family things going on,’ confided Erin. ‘Luke and I will just have to try to work out some kind of rota for getting together.’

  Returning to the dining room, they saw an older man standing near their table talking to the guys. Nodding at them, he returned to his own table.

  ‘Fecking hell! How were we to know that Gordon Leonard would be here!’

  ‘Who’s he?’ asked Erin.

  ‘The senior partner, and that’s his wife with him,’ explained Ronan.

  ‘He told us to keep it down,’ Luke added, ‘that he didn’t want the rest of the restaurant knowing the company’s business!’

  Erin had to smother her laughs. Ronan and Luke were like two schoolboys in trouble with their teacher.

  The meal was delicious and they ended up with Irish coffees all round and then decided on another bottle of wine as they continued to chat at the table. A nightcap in the bar followed, and it was nearly one thirty a.m. before they eventually said their goodnights.

  They were all a bit drunk, and when they got into their room Luke just literally stripped off and fell into bed. By the time Erin came out of the bathroom he was snoring loudly. So much for romance!

  They had breakfast in bed. Later, they both went for a reviving swim in the pool before they checked out. Looking down at the lake and the gardens, Erin made a secret promise to return to Lough Moyne House another time …

  Chapter Thirty-eight

  KATE LOOKED AROUND cassidy’s off-licence premises. In a few hours the place would be full, hopefully, with friends and customers coming along to sample the new Blue Ridge range of New Zealand wines that they were launching. They regularly had wine nights, French, Spanish and Italian, but tonight was a little bit different, as Paddy had actually managed to get the Irish agency for handling this new New Zealand wine brand. He had also invited a few fellow off-licence owners that he knew from different parts of the city and country to come along and enjoy the sampling and meet the guys from the Blue Ridge Winery, hoping that they may be interested in stocking it too. There would be some New Zealand food – she had trawled the internet for a few typical Kiwi treats to serve. There was New Zealand music and Paddy had organized that a few of the Kiwi players from their local rugby club would come along and perform the Haka, their legendary Maori dance.

  Everyone had been roped in. Sean and Kevin had helped move some of the shelves to make space, and had shifted all the cheaper beers and minerals to the back of the shop to make space for everyone; later they would serve as wine waiters. Aisling and her friend Ruby were serving the food. Fingers crossed that the weather held so they could spill out on to the paved area in front of the shop.

  A good organizer, Kate wanted everything to run smoothly for Paddy’s sake. The downturn had affected business, like everything else, but Paddy had soon realized that although people might not be buying expensive wines and spirits any more, they still wanted to stay home with a good bottle of wine that was not going to break the bank. His foresight in delivering what his customers wanted, and the fact they knew they could trust him to look after them, had ensured that Cassidy’s wines had stayed in business.

  Once Kate was satisfied that everything was organized, she slipped home to change into a classic black linen shift dress and heels, before grabbing the food she had prepared earlier and carrying it out to her car.

  Paddy was wonderful, making a point of introducing everyone and welcoming even random locals who had stumbled on the wine event by accident. Soon they were all tasting New Zealand’s finest. Hamish and Erik from the winery were great, listening tirelessly to questions about their country and telling customers about their beautiful vineyard. As the crowd assembled, wine glasses in hand, the Kiwi rugby players put on an amazing display of the Haka in front of the shop to huge applause. Paddy and Hamish then got up to speak.

  Paddy was always a little nervous speaking in public, but tonight he sounded calm and relaxed as he welcomed everyone and told them about these fantastic new wines from down under he’d discovered, and introduced Hamish.

  Afterwards the girls passed around the trays of mini tuna and kumera patties, down-under cheese puffs, and shrimps with a pistachio and coriander crumb, while the boys topped up everybody’s glasses.

  ‘Well done, Kate. You and Paddy have done a wonderful job. We’re all loving that wine,’ enthused Trish as Sean refilled her glass again.

  It was all going so well and, looking over at Paddy, she could tell he was pleased. He was deep in discussion with Bobby Murphy, who had two wine shops in Cork, and Ryan O’Donnell, who had opened an off-licence somewhere on the south side.

  Eventually the crowds began to drift away and Sean and Kevin and the girls began to tidy up all the wine glasses. Paddy had booked a table in Mario’s, the Italian restaurant only a few doors up, and the party moved there. Hamish and Erik spent a lot of the time trying to persuade them to come out and see Blue Ridge themselves.

  It was late when they eventually got home. Kate was exhausted.

  ‘Thanks for everything today, Kate,’ said Paddy, sitting down to take off his shoes and undress for bed. ‘I couldn’t have done it without you. Hamish was delighted with the way it went, and Bobby and Ryan have already placed orders with me – so it couldn’t be better.’

  ‘That’s great.’

  Looking at her husband, Kate was tempted to sit down beside him, tell him that she had had something pretty good happen to her too, and explain to him about her daughter … But looking at him, she just couldn’t do it. She couldn’t ruin tonight for him.

  Chapter Thirty-nine

  DUBLIN ZOO WAS one of the places that erin had loved as a kid and she had arranged to meet Kate here for a few hours. Luke wasn’t coming home for the weekend, so she was at a real loose end. Tonight she was going to the cinema with a few of the girls.

  Seeing Kate approach, she automatically ran to say hello to her and hug her. The zoo was the perfect place for them to walk and talk and have a coffee together.

  ‘God, I haven’t been here for years,’ admitted Kate. ‘Not since the kids were small. Aisling used to complain about the animals being behind bars and wanted the keepers to release them all.’

  ‘I used to come with my mum and dad. It was always a great family day out and we’d have a picnic. Have you seen the big African savannah section?’

  ‘No!’

  ‘Then let’s start there. It’s pretty spectacular and you see the animals up close in a much more natural habitat. I’m like Aisling – I don’t want to see them in cages either.’

  They walked around, taking in the long grasses and lakes where the animals could roam more freely and watching a mother lion keep order as her cubs played and tumbled in front of her. The zoo was packed with families, mums and dads with children of all ages, from babies in buggies to toddlers holding hands, to young kids flying around trying to take in all the animals as they careered from the elephant section to the pets’ corner, the monkey island to the seal enclosure.

  Kate was quiet.

  ‘Are you okay?’ asked Erin.

  ‘It’s just seeing all these little kids toddling around with their mums makes me realize all the times I missed with you – the things I didn’t do …’

  ‘I didn’t mean to make you feel like that,’ apologized Erin, ‘honestly I didn’t. Don’t feel guilty. I got to do most things kids do – Jack and I were spoiled!’

  ‘I’m glad your parents are such good people. I’m so grateful to them for looking after my beautiful daughter so well.’

  Sitti
ng in the busy café, Erin asked Kate about her father again.

  ‘Please tell me about Johnny.’

  ‘Erin, I’ve told you almost everything I know. We were very close … and really loved each other, but it just didn’t work out.’

  ‘That was my fault—’

  ‘No it wasn’t!’ exclaimed Kate indignantly. ‘Johnny and I could well have broken up a few months later anyway, baby or no baby!’

  ‘Do you ever still think of him, miss him?’

  ‘It was awful at first – just awful. He was the one, my one-and-only, the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, so I was heartbroken. But I guess we all get our hearts broken sometime or other … And then Paddy came along.’

  ‘And you fell in love with him?’

  ‘Well, something like that … He’s a lovely man and they are few and far between.’

  ‘Johnny was my dad,’ said Erin. ‘I keep thinking about that, and I’d really like to try and talk to him, meet him …’

  ‘I told you, it’s not a good idea,’ Kate said, her eyes flashing. ‘Why don’t you believe me?’

  ‘You didn’t think that the two of us meeting was a good idea in the beginning,’ Erin persisted, ‘and here we are. You must have some details about Johnny you can give me so I can try to find him. You said he was from Wicklow, so I could start there. Did you go to his house and meet his parents? Someone in his family must know where he is living now.’

  She could see Kate was taken aback at her insistence on trying to find out.

  ‘You are very determined.’

  ‘Yes, I told you I was.’

  ‘Erin, I’ll try to contact him, tell him that we’ve met and see what he says … Can you leave it with me? I promise that I’ll come back to you.’

  ‘Okay,’ agreed Erin, satisfied that the first steps to find her father were now beginning to be taken.

  Chapter Forty

  TALK ABOUT A quandary. Kate had no idea what to do about Erin’s insistence on tracing her father. But she knew that Erin would go ahead and do it with or without her help.

  Johnny’s family still lived in Wicklow. His dad had died about ten years ago – she had seen his obituary in the newspaper; but his mother, Cora Devlin, was still alive. Then there were his brothers and sister, all still living in the same area. Erin would easily find him.

  She needed to talk to Johnny, tell him about their daughter and how afraid she had been to meet her and what the outcome had been. He had refused to have anything to do with his baby daughter, but that had been so long ago and people change … maybe he had too.

  She phoned Cora, who, though it had been years since they met, remembered her as Johnny’s girlfriend and chatted easily to her. Cora had never been told about the baby. She filled Kate in on all the family and the twelve grandchildren she now had, and the one dote of a grandson. Johnny was away living in London, Kilburn area, and had been married and divorced twice. He was still good to Cora and came home every few months. She had always liked Kate and gave her Johnny’s phone number and address.

  Putting down the phone, Kate looked at the numbers and tried to get up the courage to phone him. The house was empty, the boys gone to parties, Paddy working, and Aisling gone off to Irish college in Connemara for a few weeks with a load of girls. Taking a breath to steady herself, she dialled the London code and waited nervously as it rang and rang.

  ‘Hello! Who is it?’

  His voice hadn’t changed a bit.

  ‘It’s Kate.’

  ‘Kate? Kate – after all these years … Are you okay?’

  ‘Yes, I’m fine.’ She was taken aback by the way he had recognized her straight away and the unexpected concern in his voice. ‘I’m fine, Johnny, but there is something I need to tell you. It’s about our daughter—’

  ‘The baby?’

  ‘She’s not a baby any more. She’s twenty-six, her name is Erin and she’s absolutely lovely.’

  ‘You’ve met her?’

  ‘Yes. I didn’t want to, but somehow she got her birth cert and managed to find me. I was in bits about it. I’m married with three kids now—’

  ‘And you’ve never told them?’

  ‘How did you guess?’

  ‘Kate, what’s this got to do with me?’

  ‘She wants to meet her father.’

  ‘Well I don’t want to meet her,’ he said firmly. ‘I’ve never been involved and that’s the way it is going to stay.’

  Kate knew she could start screaming and getting upset with him like she did before and it would make not a bit of difference.

  ‘Listen, Johnny, I know how you must feel with me phoning you out of the blue to tell you, but can’t we talk about it? She’s not looking for anything from either of us. She’s a great kid – you would be proud of her if you saw her, honestly you would. I am.’

  He was silent on the other end of the phone – he was thinking about it.

  ‘I’m in Dublin the end of next week. Can we meet up to talk about it?’

  Kate didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t seen or spoken to Johnny Devlin for years.

  ‘You can tell me about her,’ he coaxed.

  Going against her better judgement, but only for Erin’s sake, Kate arranged to meet him on Friday evening in the bar of the hotel he was staying in along the quays. She must be mad to have agreed it and was tempted to phone him back straightaway and cancel it, but because of Erin she didn’t. Their daughter was entitled to know about her father. How could they have believed that a grown adult wouldn’t demand to have full information about both her birth parents?

  They had both been so naïve then, never considering the consequences of what they had done and the effect it might have on their child. But that was then and this was now, and Erin deserved answers.

  Chapter Forty-one

  SHE MUST BE mad, mad, mad even to contemplate meeting Johnny Devlin. Sally would kill her if she ever got wind of it. The very thought of seeing him again was nerve-wracking, but she had to try to get him to change his mind about meeting Erin.

  After twenty-five years she wondered what he would be like. Was he still as handsome as before? Cora had told her he was involved in the music and entertainment business still and had an office in central London. What would he think of her, an ordinary housewife with three grown-up kids, who had done nothing very special with her life except look after her family. He’d probably find her boring.

  Boring or not, she was going to dress up to show him that she still looked good, and she calmly went through her wardrobe searching for the perfect dress.

  Paddy was working late tonight and she decided to take a taxi into town. She’d told him she was going to a reunion with some of her old college friends, and that one of the girls was home from Canada and staying in a hotel in town. She was just about to phone a taxi when Trish arrived.

  ‘Do you want to come over to my place to watch The Late Late Show?’ she asked. The two of them had got into a routine of often going to each other’s house to watch RTE’s big Friday-night show, having a few glasses of wine and a chat as Paddy worked late and Trish’s husband did a Friday-night shift in the Call Centre he helped to manage.

  ‘I’m just about to go out,’ she said, bringing Trish into the kitchen for a second.

  ‘Where are you off to?’

  ‘A reunion.’ My God, she was becoming such a liar!

  ‘School is it?’

  ‘No,’ she said, knowing full well that Trish knew she’d gone to school in Galway. ‘It’s just a few old pals from college days.’

  ‘Any old flames?’

  ‘Maybe … I don’t know, Trish,’ she replied, getting embarrassed.

  ‘Let’s see what you’re wearing.’

  ‘It’s my Louise Kennedy, the one I got for Sean’s graduation last year,’ she said, opening her coat.

  ‘Very elegant!’ said Trish. ‘Exactly!’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘For a graduation, okay, beautifu
l on; but we are talking cool Kate Cassidy with her perfect figure and looking still as beautiful as ever. Eat your heart out …’

  ‘Shit!’ said Kate.

  ‘I’m thinking that divine dress you wore at the New Zealand wine thing. You looked amazing in it. You had those poor Kiwi men drooling over you.’

  Kate belted upstairs and changed while Trish told the taxi man to wait for her.

  Arriving at the big hotel near Dublin’s Conference Centre she hesitated, wondering if she should just forget about meeting Johnny. But she was curious and found herself going through the glass revolving door and making her way to the bar.

  The Quay Hotel, overlooking the river, was modern and bright with funky purple and green and gold couches and chairs, and clusters of people having drinks. She spotted him up at the bar and waved. Okay, he had aged, but he hadn’t changed that much – she still recognized him.

  ‘Kate,’ he said, pulling her into his arms. He still smelled of the same aftershave, Eau Sauvage. ‘You look gorgeous!’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘Here, let me get you a drink.’

  They went and sat over at a table in a quiet corner and Kate had to steel herself not to be overwhelmed with the emotion of seeing him. His black hair was streaked with grey, his face even thinner than she remembered, and he was dressed in a rather flash jacket and a fitted black shirt. He had made an effort too.

  ‘So this is a turn-up, the two of us meeting after so long,’ he said, leaning forward. ‘I didn’t think our paths would ever cross again, despite what we meant to each other.’

  ‘They probably wouldn’t have except for Erin,’ she said slowly, ‘our daughter.’

  She told him all about meeting Erin and getting to know her. ‘She’s so lovely, so grown up.’

  ‘Wow! It’s kind of hard to get your head around having a grown-up kid you’ve never seen.’

  ‘You did see her!’ she reminded him angrily. ‘In the hospital. You held her, you said she was beautiful – and Johnny, she is beautiful, and intelligent and really nice. Have you any daughters?’