A Perfect Dilemma

by Zoe Dawson

  “River,” he growled. “I don’t have a condom. Fuck!”

  “You don’t need it. I’m protected. It’s okay.”

  “I always use one…every time. I want to keep you safe.”

  “I know,” I said.

  His mouth closed over mine, demanding and frenzied. I got him unbuttoned and unzipped, pushing everything to the floor. As I came up I slipped my mouth over him in the dark. He reacted right away and immediately dragged me up his body, growling, “No!” He arched his back and thrust against me, his erection silky, hard and hot against my stomach. I slipped my hands around him and he moaned deep in his chest, shuddering.

  Then he drove me back against the door and it rattled. I closed my eyes, sinking into the sensations he set off in me. Smoothing my hand up his rib cage, I arched my head back, giving him access to the side of my neck, the moist brush of his mouth sending a shiver of fire and ice along my nerve endings. He grabbed my hips, his touch loosening every connection in my body. I arched and moved against him, the rhythmic, kneading pressure setting off pinpoints of sensation, saturating me with a tingling weakness.

  His fingers tangling in my hair, Brax turned my head, leaving a trail of drugging kisses up my neck, pulling me deeper into a swirl of sensation. He lingered at the pulse point below my ear, tasting my skin; then he put his hand between my legs. I almost didn’t recognize the low, throaty sound I made as he pushed his fingers inside me, his thumb pressing a sensuous swirl. I crested quickly, almost violently, and he left his fingers there, slick and clever, kept me quivering and shuddering until he was shaking with the effort to hold back.

  “Brax,” I whispered and that was it. He pushed into me hard and fast. I had thought the feel of him would slake my hunger once and for all, but it didn’t, it only intensified.

  “Wrap your legs around me,” he said hoarsely, then we were moving to the bed and we were down on it and he was pumping into me. I couldn’t catch my breath it was so good, he was so solid and real, because I’d had Braxton in my bed before, but it was always fantasy, never reality.

  My pulse hitching, I caressed his back, and he responded by settling himself deeper between my legs. Bracing his weight on his arms, he bracketed my face with his hands, then slowly, so slowly, pulled out and thrust. “You feel so good, sugar,” he whispered.

  I lifted my hips, opening myself to him further.

  He tightened his hold on my face and brushed his mouth against mine again. “So damned good.”

  I flexed my knees, urging him up as I smoothed my hand across the bunched muscles of his shoulders. “Move higher,” I whimpered, “I want—ah, Brax—”

  His strokes were slow, controlled, and oh-so-deep, and the connection I felt with each thrust, while our gazes held, was as intense as it got.

  He freed one hand to slide it up and over my breasts, then back to my hips, his fingers digging in tightly while he pumped harder, faster. I met him thrust for thrust, reveling in the feel of him beneath my palms. I felt him so thoroughly it was as though I was part of him, as he was part of me. When he stiffened above me with a low cry of pleasure, he seemed almost mindless, the frenzied way he drove into me, our bodies slapping together frantically.

  He collapsed on top of me and we both struggled for breath, our bodies slick. He rolled, bringing me with him, holding me tight, still shuddering in the aftermath.

  Our hearts raced and our bodies quivered.

  “Geezus, River,” he croaked. He shifted while I was still trying to slow my pulse, to breathe fully. I clutched him, afraid he would leave now. But he rested his face in the hollow of my neck and shoulder and seemed to be letting his system settle, too, as he stroked my hair, pressed his cheek against mine, and simply held me.

  Hot and sweaty sex. I’d had it before. But this had felt like more, a lot more. It had felt like…I couldn’t find the words. But he’d already made it clear hot and sweaty was all he wanted, all it could be.

  Then he pressed a kiss to my hair, and my heart bloomed so swiftly it made my eyes burn. So stupid, so silly, I scolded myself. Imagining anything with Braxton as being more was foolish. He wasn’t interested in anything permanent. This was attraction made explosive by years of denying ourselves this…whatever this was.

  Yet there was so much more here for me, and no amount of silent scolding was going to change it. I guess that was when I fully realized what I had done. I’d opened up myself to such risk with him.

  But I had already decided, back at the hanging tree, the risk was worth it. And I would gladly pay the price. I resolved then to give myself the gift of full and free feeling, to allow this to be—to me—what it truly was. No matter what Braxton thought or felt. This was important to me. There was no way to avoid having my heart involved, and I saw no reason to try.

  And it was all I could do not to cling to him now. I couldn’t force myself to move away, toss off a light laugh, make some clever or sarcastic remark about the mind-blowing sex we so effortlessly shared. For me this wasn’t casual. Would never be casual.

  He slid his fingers under my chin after he propped himself up on his elbow. I resisted for a second, not wanting him to see what I felt, but sure it was there in my eyes. I felt unmasked, naked and vulnerable. It had nothing to do with being naked in his arms and everything to do with being naked emotionally. Brax missed nothing. Even if he was unprepared for what he might find, I doubted he’d miss it. When his eyes softened, I slipped my fingers into his hair and drew him down for a tender kiss.

  “Scoot up,” he murmured against my mouth, and we moved without letting go of each other. I was glad, because I wasn’t ready to let this go yet, to let him go. If I was going to risk it all this way, offer my heart freely, shouldn’t I get as much out of this crazy bargain as I could?

  Even though I understood having more now would hurt like a bitch later. I didn’t care. There was more, so much more I wanted from him, and little of it was physical.

  He settled us at the head of the bed, reaching down to pull up the sheet as our bodies cooled. He drew me fully against him and I felt something knotted in me loosen. He wasn’t leaving.

  Our gazes met. Stunned by what I saw there, I could only stare into his eyes, eyes promising more than desire, or satisfied pleasure. In their ocean of blue, I saw an intense affection, so honest, so direct, so open, so…naked. Exposed. As exposed as I felt. He looked so far into me, with such unashamed need, I felt touched more deeply than I’d ever imagined possible.

  “River,” he murmured, his mouth settling over mine so sweetly. Wrapped up in each other we kissed, parted, kissed again.

  His arms tightened around me, and I rubbed my face against his broad chest…and then I drifted contentedly into sleep.

  #

  River Pearl

  “River!”

  I was yanked out of a sound sleep, disoriented to find myself wrapped around a hot, hard male body. Snapping awake, I jerked and literally kicked Braxton right out of bed. He hit the floor with a thud and a groan.

  “River, are you all right? The door is locked.”

  “In a minute,” I said, trying to keep my voice even and not panic-stricken. I leaned over the side of the bed to find Braxton smirking up at me.

  “Well, good morning to you, too, sugar,” he said.

  “Under the bed,” I hissed, but he didn’t move, and I kind of lost my train of thought. Man, oh man, Braxton Outlaw naked on my floor, hard muscled gorgeousness, mussed hair, sleepy eyes. “Stop distracting me and get under the bed,” I whispered.

  He chuckled, rolled, and the last thing I saw was his fine ass disappear. I looked towards the door and my stomach jumped. My nightie and Brax’s clothes, including his boots, were still there. “Shit!”

  I scrambled out of bed and heard him laugh again. He would. I snatched up my nightie, his jeans, shirt and boots and ran back to the bed. Brax was peeking out, his blue eyes traveling over my nakedness.

  I stuffed the clothes in his face and shoved the boots i
n after. I heard an umph and then more laughter. Damn, it was so provocative and wonderful to hear him laugh.

  I ran for the robe thrown over my armchair, shrugged into it, and belted it as I headed for the door. Brax was still chuckling. “Hush up,” I said as I passed.

  When I twisted the lock and opened the door, Jake was standing there. “What the hell took you so long?”

  “I was peeing, if you must know.”

  He blushed. “Oh, sorry.”

  “What time is it?” I said running my hands through my matted and knotted hair. Damn I probably looked like I’d been ravished. Fancy that.

  He frowned, peering at me. “Eight. You’re usually up by now.”

  “I am. I was.” I blurted out, completely off balance. “I was…sketching…yeah, then had to pee.”

  “Okay, you can stop with the bodily functions now,” he said flushing. “Uncle Win wants to know if you want to go fishing.”

  “Today? Now?”

  “Yes.”

  I glanced back into my room, but Brax was still hidden. “Um. Okay, I’ll go, but you’ll have to give me an hour.”

  “All right. I’ll tell him.” He went to turn away. “You look…different.”

  “What? How?”

  “Less stressed, softer. I don’t know. Different.” His eyes cut to my bed and the disarray of the sheets. My heart pounded.

  I was still trying to recover from Jake’s comment while I closed and locked the door. When I turned, Brax was standing on the other side of the bed and he was still completely bare-assed naked.

  My forehead dropped to the door with a thwack. “You didn’t even put your jeans on?”

  He shrugged those broad shoulders. “No. Who was going to see me? The dust bunnies? I told them to avert their eyes.” He smiled and my heart rate sped up. Braxton Outlaw was devastating most of the time, but having him naked and smiling was body-melting, brain-fryingly catastrophic.

  His eyes danced and I smiled back, unable to keep a straight face anymore.

  “I think some of them peeked,” he added.

  I laughed.

  “Geezus, River Pearl. You are beautiful in the morning.”

  My heart caught as he started around the end of the bed and I took a step back. I had thought he’d dominated me last night—had it only been last night? His presence was so much bigger than life, it felt as though he’d been in mine far longer than last night. But now he was standing buck naked in front of me in the light of day. I realized I had sorely underestimated how big a presence he truly was. “Brax. You should go. What about Outlaws and your breakfast rush?”

  “I texted Jackie at five and told her to carry on. I’m the boss, after all, and I haven’t taken a day off in a long time.”

  “You woke up at five…and you stayed?” He kept coming, his eyes full of mischief, and an obviously interested body part hardening and thickening as he moved towards me.

  “Yes, I stayed. I’m not done with you yet.”

  Ohmigod. I had to remind myself to breathe. There was something I was supposed to be doing. Um. Something important. His close proximity was making it extremely hard to concentrate on what he was saying and my brain synapses were getting short-circuited by the smell of him, the feel of him in my personal space. I lifted a hand to ward him off, as if it could hold him back. “I have to shower.”

  “Fine by me, sugar. I could use a shower. Will you wash my back?”

  He reached me, his hands getting busy with the belt on my robe, his eyes dropping down to the knot. I covered his hands and his breath released slowly while I ran my palms up his arms to his biceps, getting lost in the way his muscle curved right there.

  Wait, I was supposed to be pushing him away. Right. The shower.

  I deftly moved to the side and toward the bed, which wasn’t exactly one of my most brilliant ideas.

  Without moving, he turned his head, giving me a full-on view of his broad, muscular back and hard butt which put the sexy in his jeans…and my heart stalled. His thick black lashes were tangled, and he gave me such a sultry, hot blue bedroom eyes, oh-no-you-don’t-darlin’ look, I had to remind myself to breathe…again.

  “We playin’ games, sugar?”

  He effortlessly ducked the pillow I picked up and tossed at him. “No, I’ve got to take a shower and make my breakfast.”

  His brows rose and his expression went from mischief to surprise. “Make your breakfast? Is that Princess Speak for my cook makes my protein shake and I sip it, oh-so-daintily, through a straw?”

  “Very funny.”My breath hitched when he got closer. He reached for me, but I backpedaled over the bed, stopping and watching him warily when he put a knee on the mattress. He smirked as only an Outlaw could, looking delectable and dangerous, his blue eyes tracking me like a predator. He cocked his head, his thick, dark hair tumbling over his forehead and my heart bumped hard against my chest.

  Why exactly was I running away from him?

  “You don’t sip oh-so-daintily through a straw?” He clicked his tongue, sounding so disappointed. He shook his head. “You are so not the lady I thought you were.”

  I laughed and threw another pillow at him, which he took full in the face. “And I was right. You are a knave.”

  He lunged and I squealed, scrambling over the other side of the bed before I stopped, shoving my hair back. He lay full across my queen bed now, belly down, filling it up and looking mildly irritated that he’d missed me. I had to remind myself even an American Princess must inhale to give her starving lungs oxygen.

  He pushed up onto his elbows and propped his chin in his hands. “I never assume a woman can cook, and I certainly wouldn’t risk getting my head stuck on a pike by assuming a Princess could cook.”

  “You are such a smart-ass.” I had to hold back my laugh. Dammit, Brax was so darned cute. I had no idea.

  He blinked and a slow, killer grin spread across his face. And I’d thought he was devastating when he was a brooding asshole. “Yes, I am. It’s part of my overwhelming charm.”

  I have to say I had no idea what to do with him like this. We had always had such a contrary relationship. “And you’ve got it wrong. I don’t put the heads of captivating bastards on pikes. I have a more…constructive…way of putting their heads to use.” I couldn’t say I didn’t like this side of him immensely, though.

  I decided I shouldn’t worry about the future, since there wasn’t going to be one. I was locked into my career and he had a business to run.

  Besides, what was he supposed to do? Follow me around the country and overseas like a lap dog? Brax would never be happy with that kind of life. No, I had to keep my head straight on this. A month was all we had, then I would be back in my world.

  He exhaled heavily and closed his eyes. “I have morning wood that got way worse with all your silky skin against my dick…lady…come here.”

  My insides went liquid at the hoarse, provocative sound of his voice. Braxton Outlaw. How long had I been trying to get him like this? And now I had an uncle I adored visiting who wanted to take me fishing. But it was impossible not to get caught up in Brax’s intensity. He didn’t even have to try. How he worked his devastating smile with those dreamy blue eyes of his, I had no idea. But I also wasn’t deceived by his easygoing manner. I was no fool and already knew Brax had a dark side.

  “C’mon, sugar darlin’. I’ll show you what I know about head.”

  I took a quick, heated breath. “I’m sure it has nothing whatsoever to do with pikes.”

  “Oh, I got a pike I can put into play,” he said, silky soft.

  He moved so fast, I barely had a chance to get away from him, streaking for the bathroom door. If my brother came up here again and Brax got caught in my room…I couldn’t begin to guess how long my momma would need to spend recovering in her bed.

  He cornered me in the bathroom, grabbed the back of my robe and, with a triumphant laugh, he spun me against him. His clever fingers were at the knot, and it unraveled as easil
y as I did. He parted the robe and for a moment he just…stared. My knees weakened at the appreciation and desire warming those blue depths. His head dipped down. His hands were hot on my waist, his mouth brushed my lips. “Why did I fight so hard against this?” he murmured. “River, you are so beautiful.”

  “So you said.”

  “It bears repeating.”

  The lock of hair on his forehead was irresistible, and I reached up and pushed it back. Such a simple thing, impossible before, which I could do now. His hair was silky, but my hand discovered his cheek was rough. So many textures to this man. He looked deliciously tough with the dark stubble peppering his jaw.

  His hands slipped over my hips and tightened, dragging me against his hard-on. My attempt to resist him was a total failure. Which was just fine with me.

  “Brax,” I whispered as I leaned forward and tasted him along his jaw, “you’re quite beautiful, too.”

  He pressed his face against me, the friction of his stubble sending tingles rushing everywhere, like crazy, pinwheel sparklers on the Fourth of July. He turned his head, capturing my mouth, rumbling a low groan when I nipped him.

  He pushed me back, catching the door with his heel and closing it gently. Pushing the robe off my shoulders, his hands slipped down my back to my butt, lifting me into his erection.

  “Water…” he said, and his lips were gone. I opened my eyes to see his stunned look. “Geezus, that is some shower.”

  I chuckled, pressing my face into his throat. “Leave it to a man to stop making love to me to ogle my shower instead. Hmm, I think I’m offended.”

  He kept staring at it.

  “Do the two of you want to be alone?”