Remember Me (Men of Honor Series Book 1)

by Lara Van Hulzen

  How did she do that? The connection between them was one thing but the way she could read his mind sometimes was downright scary.

  “Do you need anything?”

  His throat felt like the Sahara. “Water would be great.”

  She moved from the bed to the tray near the wall. From a small pitcher she poured water into a cup and brought it to him. “Here. I’ll help you.”

  He took a sip then laid his head back again on the pillow. “You know, I could actually get used to this. Maybe being an invalid isn’t so bad. You taking care of me is kind of nice.” He gave her his best grin.

  She laughed. Just the response he was looking for.

  She scooted the chair she’d been sleeping in up close to his bed and sat down. “If you’re up for it, we need to talk.”

  His heart sank. Here it comes. The speech where she would tell him she can’t trust him and there’s no future for her with someone she can’t trust.

  “Sophia…” Her voice cracked. She cleared her throat and started again.

  He didn’t deserve her. She’d been through so much because of him.

  “Sophia told me why you left. Why you didn’t go through with our wedding. She said you wanted revenge on the people who killed your parents.”

  He nodded, unable to form words. How in the world did Sophia find out so much about him without him having even a glimmer of what she was up to?

  “Why didn’t you just tell me about the undercover job?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know. I wanted to avenge my parents’ death so bad I could taste it. Nothing else mattered. If I took the job, you would be in danger. Dane kept saying I shouldn’t do it.”

  “You could have told me. We could have at least decided something together.”

  “I know, Tess. Look, I screwed up. I take full responsibility for all the idiotic decisions I made, and I’m sorry. More sorry than you could ever imagine.”

  “Well, here’s the deal.” She leaned forward and took his hand in hers. So delicate, like a doll. “From now on, we talk about everything. No secrets, no games. Ever.”

  His pulse sped up. From now on? Was she truly willing to forgive him?

  “Are you saying you forgive me?”

  She smiled. “Ben. When I stood out there on that cliff, all I could think about was getting away and finding you. All I wanted was for you to know how much I love you, how much I’ve always loved you. I’m sorry I didn’t give you more of a chance to explain. If I had, maybe we could have avoided all of this.” She waved her hand around. Tears flowed down her cheeks.

  He’d left her at the altar, almost gotten her killed, and she was apologizing to him.

  He growled.

  “What? What is it?”

  “I want to hold you so bad and I can’t move!”

  Her laughter tickled his senses. “I can help with that.”

  She crawled up onto the bed carefully and lay next to his good side, resting her head on his shoulder. Wrapping his arm around her, he held tight. This was it. This was heaven. All he ever wanted in the world right here in his arms.

  “I will never deceive you again, Tess. No secrets. No games.” He kissed the top of her head. Her hair smelled like lemons.

  “Ok. Deal.” Her breath was warm against his chest. “And Ben?”

  “Yes?”

  “You try to pull anything funny again and I’ll sic Aimee on you.”

  His laughter echoed through the room. Her cheek curved against him in a smile.

  “You’ve got a deal.”

  ***

  “She’s a beautiful bride.”

  “She sure is. And she’s all mine.” Mike’s grin spread across his face. Ben swore Mike glowed just as much as Emma.

  The two men stood on the balcony. Music pulsed from the room behind them. The reception was in full force. The sun setting on the water cast an orange glow. Mike and Emma couldn’t have asked for a better day to wed.

  “How are you holding up?” Mike pointed to Ben’s side.

  “Great. Doc says all is healing nicely. Should be able to be back on the job soon.”

  “I thought you were already working again.” Mike took a sip of water. Set his glass down on the railing.

  “I am. Just desk work though. Nothing too strenuous. It’s wreaking havoc on my middle.” He patted his stomach. “I can’t wait to get up and moving again. Running, surfing. All the good stuff.”

  Mike laughed. “You look fine to me. Tess says you’re too hard on yourself.”

  “Does she now?” Ben smiled.

  “I think she’s right. She says you’re still beating yourself up over what happened with Sophia.”

  Ben looked out over the water. His smile faded. He was still working through how he felt about Sophia. But now wasn’t the time to talk to Mike about it. That would be a guaranteed buzzkill on his wedding day.

  “I’m fine. I worry more about Tess.”

  “She still having nightmares?”

  Ben nodded. “Not as many. They’re few and far between now.”

  He thought of the middle of the night phone calls from Tess. Wanting to be there for her, he said to call when she had them. They’d talk it through and she’d be able to sleep again. He would pace for hours though, unable to shake just how close he came to losing her.

  “We’re here for both of you, me and Emma.” Mike patted Ben’s shoulder.

  “I know. And I can’t thank you enough. I know the threat of Carlos and Sophia is gone, but I feel so much better knowing Tess is right next door to you guys.”

  Ben had come up to see Tess almost every weekend since that night at the cliffs. It tore at his heart every time he had to leave her. Having Mike and Emma right there gave him some peace of mind.

  Ben looked back into the reception hall. Tess was talking to Emma, their heads together like schoolgirls. Emma’s hair was down, her hair curling around the headpiece she wore. Tess’s hair was up, wisps of gold curling around her face. The light orange dress made her skin glow. Her cheeks were pink. Angelic. Perfect.

  “Hey there.” Mike waved a hand in front of Ben’s face. His eyes followed Ben’s to where the two women stood. “We’re two lucky boneheads, aren’t we?”

  Ben laughed. “We sure are.”

  “Come on. Let’s go join the celebration. I don’t want to miss any more time with my bride.”

  Ben followed Mike back inside, hoping by the end of the night, he and Tess would also have cause to celebrate.

  ***

  Tendrils of hair stuck to the back of Tess’s neck. Sweating in a bridesmaid’s dress was no fun, but she wasn’t about to stop dancing. The ceremony was a reverent, blessed event. The reception a rocking good party. Mike and Emma laughed and shimmied with one another, both radiating happiness and joy.

  She scanned the room. Ben had disappeared after the last song. Said he had to go to the restroom. But she hadn’t seen him since. Finding him in the corner near the door to the balcony, her eyes locked with his. He motioned with his head for her to join him outside. Fresh air and a chance to catch her breath sounded just right. Not to mention some alone time with Ben.

  The past few months had been a whirlwind of weekends together, falling back into the love they once shared. But something new had grown as well. That night on the cliff validated everything they felt for one another. It brought them closer. Nothing but death could separate them. God had spared them, and Tess thanked Him every day for another chance at being together.

  She weaved through the crowd on the dance floor. She stepped out onto the balcony, and the ocean air blew over her. What a relief! Such a difference from the sauna of the dance floor inside.

  Ben leaned against the balcony railing. “Mike and Emma throw quite a party.”

  “Yes, they do!” She moved up next to him. His suit coat lay draped across a chair nearby, his collar unbuttoned. His beard was shaved to a respectable length but he’d left his hair a bit longer in the back, curls grazing his shirt collar
. Handsome. Charming. A dangerous mix. And all hers.

  She smiled.

  “Penny for your thoughts.”

  She leaned on the railing and giggled. “You can have them for free.”

  He turned and put his arm around her, both looking out at the water.

  “I was just wondering what I did to deserve you.”

  He laughed. “That’s funny. I wonder that myself about you every single day.”

  “I guess we’re a good pair then, aren’t we?”

  “I think so.” He kissed the top of her head.

  The crash of waves drowned out the thumping of music behind them. Sophia’s screams echoed in Tess’s head, and she shivered. The memories crept up on her at strange times. Working with a counselor at church, she was getting better. Praying she wouldn’t be haunted for life. “Do you think we’ll ever get past everything that happened?”

  “I think so. We have each other to help.”

  She nodded. Leaned her head against his chest.

  “I keep hearing my dad say, ‘Lives saved, lives changed.’ I fear I let him down bigtime in this situation.”

  Lifting her head, she looked him in the eyes. “That’s not true, Ben. You had no way of knowing what Sophia was really like. She wasn’t a life you could save. And Dane said Carlos is actually going to a Bible study at the prison. So that may be a life changed.”

  “I pray that’s true.” He squeezed her closer to him.

  Taking a deep breath, she inhaled the scents that calmed her. The ocean, the sand, Ben’s cologne, mixed with a something unique to him.

  “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.” He reached under her chin and lifted her lips to his. A tender, soft kiss lasting only a moment.

  She rested her head on his chest.

  “I’ve been talking to Officer Petrie. You know, the one who helped me after my accident?” He rubbed her neck gently with his hand.

  “Oh yeah? What about?”

  “Well, it turns out there’s an opening on the police force here. He said it’s mine if I’m interested. I’m considering taking it.”

  She looked up at him. Her heart raced. They had talked about him maybe moving near her, but she was hesitant to ask him outright to give up his job. His life. Going back to San Diego was an option, but not something she truly wanted. And he was aware of that.

  He looked down at her, his dark eyes twinkling with mischief. He was definitely up to something. “And I want to ask you something.”

  He reached in his pants pocket then dropped to one knee.

  “Tess Jansenn, I’ve loved you my whole life and with my whole heart. I prayed for someone like you, and God brought you to me. I messed things up. But I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you’ll let me. Will you marry me?”

  Tears poured down her cheeks. She knelt before him, grabbing his face in her hands. “Yes! Absolutely yes.”

  His arms wrapped around her waist. Their kiss filled with all the love and passion she’d felt since the day they met.

  Applause drew them from the private moment. Mike and Emma stood in front of the crowd at the door.

  “You two gonna stay down there all day or can we add your party to ours?”

  Ben stood up, bringing Tess with him. He placed the ring on her finger and held up her hand. “She said yes!”

  The crowd erupted into cheers and applause.

  The DJ thumped an upbeat song, drawing everyone back to the dance floor.

  Tess giggled. Her world spinning with joy. She held out her hand, and the solitaire set in a wave pattern caught an overhead light and shimmered.

  “Ben, it’s beautiful. But you already bought me a ring. I still have it. I don’t need a new one.”

  He shook his head. “No way. That one represents the past. This one right here represents what lies ahead.”

  He lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it. Then he led her to the dance floor, to a future together.

  The End

  Acknowledgments

  Craig – You have believed in me from day one. And you’ve never let me give up, no matter how tough things got. For everything, I love you.

  Lisa, Nate and Cole – My biggest cheerleaders and greatest fans. Thank you for your patience and encouragement always. I love you most.

  Mom – Thanks for letting me vent and for understanding how tough this business can be. Your constant encouragement keeps me going. I love you.

  Sergeant Glen Glaser, Jr. – Thanks for letting me ride along with you and learn what a CHP officer really sees in a day. For actually reading my book and answering countless questions about police procedures. You’re the best!

  Michelle Gunnett – Thank you for sharing your expertise on hospital procedures and work as an ER nurse. I’m grateful for your patience with me when I hounded you with emails.

  Jennifer Sturak – From college roommates to you helping me edit over and over and over again. Thank you for your patience, time and belief in my abilities.

  Heather Spiva – My critique partner extraordinaire. Thank you for countless reading, editing, advising and talking me off ledges. I adore you.

  Inspire Writers – There are so many of you who have encouraged me over the years. Coffee dates, emails, countless Atta girls. Thank you! (Beth, Jenny, Shannon, Joanne)

  Ellen Tarver – Thanks for never going easy on me. I am a better writer because of you. I hope you will edit my books forever.

  Sherry Holub at JV Media Designs – Thank you, Sherry, for putting up with my random emails and changes. My website is fantastic and it’s all because of you.

  Crystal Posey – I have had more fun working with you on these book covers than a person should. Your work is outstanding and I’m grateful for you and for your friendship.

  Catherine Bybee – Thank you for answering my gazillion questions and helping guide me along the way.

  Dean Nelson - You encouraged me to think outside the box and took a terrified, saucer-eyed college freshman and told her four words everyone in this business longs to hear – “You’re a good writer.”

  My family and friends – There are so many people in my life who make it possible for me to do this job. It takes a village and I love my village people. You know who you are. Thank you!

  My CFC Family – Thank you for showing me that I’m stronger than I thought and for never letting me give up. All I’ve learned from you I take into my work and the rest of my life and it’s priceless. Thank you.

  Diana Flegal – I’m grateful for all you’ve taught me and for our friendship.

  For those of you in the writing/reviewing world who have cheered me on and given me outstanding advice – Thank you, Ronie Kendig and Lori Twichell.

  About The Author

  Lara Van Hulzen received her Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism from Point Loma Nazarene University. She lives with her husband and three children in Northern California.