It's Wrong for Me to Love You, Part 3

by Krystal Armstead

  “You both are young, and you have a lot of growing to do,” Avery spoke up. “When situations like these arise, you have to talk to each other. You can’t just pack up and leave when times get tough, Aaron. It’s obvious that this young lady loves you. You both have been through a lot over the years. Young lady,” Avery looked at me, hugged up with his son, “we were just about to send Aaron back to you. My son needs you. I think that you deserve this event that my wife wants to coordinate for you. Weddings are her specialty. It’ll be phenomenal, trust me.” Avery grinned, ocean blue eyes sparkling.

  “What do you think?” Aaron looked down into my face.

  I nodded, letting go of him, looking back at my sister and my cousin. “Let’s do it.”

  Renée winked at me, tears already sliding down her face.

  Autumn was so happy, jumping up and down like a little kid in a candy store. “Bachelorette party, whoop!” She squealed.

  Everyone laughed a little.

  “Baby, I didn’t mean to leave you.” Aaron held my chin, turning my face back around so our eyes could meet. “I couldn’t stay around and watch you with that dude. It hurt too much. I just needed to get away from all that for a while. Fighting muthafuckas isn’t my style, and you know it. I know you love me, and I know it was hard as hell for you to work with him. Your cousin was wrong about me, I’m not trying to control you or run your life. I just want what’s best for you, what’s healthy for you. You’re my wife, and yes, you belong to me, so I just figured that I at least had a little say so in what goes on in your life. Being around that dude was unhealthy for you, and it was unhealthy for me, too. I couldn’t stand by and watch him hurt you anymore.”

  I sighed, feeling the urge to tell everyone about the baby. “Ummm, since everyone is here right now, I think I should just say this.”

  Aaron looked into my face, preparing himself for the worst. He sighed.

  “I love this house, but I am not sure that it’s big enough. We have one bedroom, your weight room, your library, and the guest room. I think we need a five-bedroom house unless you plan on turning one of those rooms into a nursery.” I braced myself for everyone’s reaction.

  Aaron and his parents just looked at me for a few seconds before it actually registered to them what I had just told them. Ella was the first to catch on, screaming, grabbing me, and squeezing me as hard as she could. “Oh my God!” she squealed. “Oh my goodness, a baby?” She let go of me, watching the look on her son’s face.

  Aaron held my hands, his light eyes glistening. He had the same reaction that my cousin had when I told her. He placed his hands on my stomach, his light eyes searching my face. “Baby, is this safe? Are you gonna be okay?”

  I nodded, looking up into his face. “I think so. I was just afraid to tell you because of what happened to Sara. I’m so scared, Aaron, of losing this baby. I can’t go through that again.”

  Aaron held my face in his hands, kissing my lips. “Your loss matters to me, Heaven. I’m here with you, baby, you know that. Whatever happens, we’re in this together. Let’s just hope for the best and not think about the worst.”

  I looked up into his face. “Aaron, are you happy?” I whispered.

  Aaron kissed my lips again, “Hell yeah, I’m happy.”

  I unhooked the necklace from around my neck and removed his ring. I held his hand, looking up into his face as I slid his ring back onto his finger. “Never take this off again, Aaron.”

  Aaron grinned. “I won’t. I promise.” He looked back at his father. “Dad, my baby is having my baby, did you hear that?” Aaron let go of me and went over to hug his father.

  “Congratulations, son.” His father was teary eyed, wrapping his arms around his son.

  Ella hugged me again. “Wait.” She let go of me. “You are sure this baby is my son’s, right?”

  We all looked at her.

  “Mom, really?” Aaron shook his head at her.

  Ella shrugged. “Well, given past circumstances, you know I had to ask!”

  I can’t begin to tell you how happy that I was. The events that happened prior to that day didn’t even exist at that moment. Of course, a part of my heart would always belong to Jamie Green. He taught me how to love, but Aaron taught me the definition of what love truly was. It was about sacrifice, honesty, and commitment. I finally had someone who valued me. I had a family, and for the first time in my life, a mother. I couldn’t have been happier. I guess fairy tales do exist after all.

  Chapter 11: Mama’s Baby, Daddy’s Maybe

  Charlene

  I woke up to the sound of Ashton’s heart beating in my ear and breath blowing through my hair. I looked up into his face, gently kissing his lips. I hated to admit, it but it felt good waking up next to someone who I actually cared about every morning. I know I had told Ashton two months before that we weren’t exclusive, that I wasn’t his girl just because we had sex, but somehow, from the moment he touched me in that closet, my body belonged to him. I deleted every contact in my phone that wasn’t family. If it wasn’t about modeling or Alisha’s dance studio, I had nothing to do with it. From the moment I left work, from the moment I left Alisha’s dance studio, I was with Ashton. But even though Ashton had me feeling some type of way, I still couldn’t shake the fact that it all felt so familiar, that we’d slept together before. Though I couldn’t see how that was possible, the more I slept with him, the more apparent it became.

  We got up that morning around 7:30. The cook fixed us a nice breakfast, and Ashton was off to work. I sat there in the kitchen waiting for my sister, Heather, to stop by to pick up little August. I sat at the island in my kitchen drinking a cup of coffee, when Lilia came into the kitchen, removing her apron. She looked at me, lips pursed together.

  I looked up as she stood beside the doorway, letting Jamie into the kitchen. I stood from the stool, watching Jamie walk in, dressed in Giuseppe from head to toe. I rolled my eyes, folding my arms across my chest. I hadn’t heard from Jamie since June, and it was August 8. I saw clips from his stage play on VH1. I also heard over the radio that his reckless actions during the stage play caused Ne’Vaeh to end both her contact with Anastasia and her contract with Kenya Love. He never could follow directions.

  Jamie grinned, “Sup, shawty?” He approached me at the island, sitting down on a stool just as I sat down beside him, facing him. “What’s good wit’cha?” he sat the bag that he had in his hand on the floor, and then removed his cap.

  “Oh, I’m good. How about you? You’re the one who’s a star.” I picked up my coffee mug and started sipping from it. “How was the tour? I heard you were a showstopper.”

  Jamie’s eyes searched mine. “I did about ten shows. Once shawty quit, they had a hard time finding an actress who could bring it like she could. I spent a lot of time in the studio, though.”

  I shook my head at him. “What did you do to her? Why did she quit the opportunity of a lifetime?” I took another few sips

  Jamie shook his head at me, “Naw, shawty, it wasn’t just me. Her cousin’s wife was driving her hard, doing whatever she could to piss Aaron off. Hiring me only made it worse. Not to mention shawty is pregnant.”

  I spit coffee all over him.

  Jamie just looked at me as I hopped up off the stool to grab a towel.

  “Oh my goodness, Jamie, I’m sorry!” I ran a dishtowel under some water. I came over him and patted his shirt. “I’m sorry; I’ll fix this. Oh my goodness, you just threw me with that information.” I looked up into his face as I dabbed his shirt. “Pregnant? How is she?”

  Jamie shrugged. “Fine now, I guess. She left Atlanta and went to go get dude after he was arrested.”

  My eyes widened. I shoved the towel into his chest, nearly pushing him off of the stool. “Jamie, what the fuck did you do? You know what, I don’t even wanna know. It was my fault; I should’ve known better to give you the idea of going to Atlanta. I told you to get an acting career started, not fuck up a marriage.”

  Ja
mie just looked at me as I sat back down on the stool next to him. “I didn’t do anything but bring the two closer together. She left Atlanta and went to Miami to be with the nigga, yo. She’s happy with him. She’s finally getting the life she deserves. It’s not with me, but it’s what she deserves regardless.”

  I just looked at the hurt expression on Jamie’s face. “She told you about the baby she lost, huh?”

  Jamie nodded, “Yeah, she hates me for letting her go through that alone, too, yo. Shawty hates the fuck out of me right now. I don’t exist anywhere in her world anymore. I tried apologizing to her, but she wouldn’t listen. So I had to do that shit in front of thousands of people, during our first performance. I know I was out of line when I kissed shawty, but I had to do something to get her to listen to me. Once they closed the curtain, it was on. Next thing I know, me and her nigga were on the floor, throwin’ blows. The nigga can fight, too.” Jamie laughed a little. “I tried to block one of his punches, and the nigga broke my wrist. The shit still hasn’t healed all the way.”

  I shook my head, getting up, going over to the counter to pour another cup of coffee. Jamie was always about the drama. He loved being the center of attention. He loved when the spotlight was on him, which is why being in the acting industry was the perfect career for him. I had no idea he was going to bring his personal life out in public. I am pretty sure that little stunt of his cost Anastasia and Kenya hundreds of thousands of dollars. Just when I started to pour another cup of coffee, I noticed Ashton’s work badge sitting on the counter. “Shit!” I muttered to myself.

  Jamie looked up at me, “You good?”

  I hesitated. “Uhhh, yeah, Ashton left his work badge over here is all.” I continued pouring my cup of coffee.

  Jamie just looked at me, not even sure what to say to me. When he left, I was sleeping with Ashton, and when he came back, I was still doing the same. I had been seeing Ashton for two months. We never verbally said that we were a couple, but we were always together. We were best friends who had sex, and it felt awesome. I could be myself with Ashton. I didn’t have to get cute, put on makeup, wear expensive clothes, try to impress him, or lie about who I was. He accepted me, flaws, past, and all, and it felt so good. He was spending time with little August, and the more they played together, the more it became apparent that I had to find out whether or not we’d slept together. Little August looked just like me, so I couldn’t go off of his looks, but the way they both laughed together gave me chills.

  “So, you and Ashton, y’all are seeing each other now?” Jamie watched me drip French vanilla cream into my coffee.

  I rolled my eyes to myself, stirring my coffee. “The last time I checked, I could do what the fuck I wanted. And unless you’re wifin’ me, you have no say-so in what the fuck I choose to do with my time.”

  “Is this exclusive?” Jamie asked, ignoring my smart-ass remark. “Are you seeing this dude, Charlie?”

  I looked at Jamie. “What does it matter to you? Ashton is my friend. Do you know he has nightmares at night about Alisha? If someone died in your arms, how would you cope with that? You’d need someone to hold you at night, too. He needs me, and whatever way I can help, I will.”

  Jamie shook his head at me. “You’re not helping him by leading him on. You know that boy is ready to settle down wit’cha. And you’re not ready to settle down with anyone, shawty.”

  “Well, what if I am?” I looked at him.

  Jamie grinned. “Not with him you’re not.”

  I looked at Jamie. I needed Ashton just as much as he needed me. In a way, we were each other’s crutch. I needed someone to care about me and so did Ashton.

  “You keep fuckin’ with this dude’s head, the next thing he’ll be doing is bending down on one knee. Just watch, shawty.” Jamie warned me. “I bet dude already has the ring picked out. Shit, it’s probably in the gym bag I’m sure he brings over here every night. When dude comes home tonight, check his bag, I’m tellin’ you, shawty, it’s in there!”

  “You need to mind your own damn business. You can’t even get your own problems right, yet you miraculously know the solutions to mine.” I rolled my eyes, really not feeling like hearing Jamie’s opinion about my life or what I decided to do with it. “Ashton can get whatever, whenever, wherever, how the fuck ever he wants it. And you can take that whatever, whenever, wherever, and how the fuck ever you wanna take it. You always wanna run everyone. Nigga, you don’t run me! You always want your pie, cake, and ice cream, and think the next bitch don’t want the same thing.”

  Jamie just shook his head at me, placing his cap back on his head. “Yo, I need you to come to this White Party with me tonight. It’s a benefit for cancer survivors. My sister is gonna be there. You know she had cervical cancer a few years ago. I think it would be a good look if you came to show your support to the women still battling cancer.”

  I sighed. “Jamie, I really got a lot to do tonight.”

  Jamie knew I was really fragile when it came to the cancer stuff. I watched Alisha remain strong through her entire ordeal. I tried to keep a positive state of mind about life, but it wasn’t easy.

  Jamie still kept picking at my wounds. “Shawty, some of them are girls as young as three and four, shawty. What if we had a daughter? What if that was our little girl? Some of these girls don’t have parents who are there for them. They don’t have anybody. They need to know someone cares.”

  I just looked at him, lowering my cup. He always played on my guilty conscience. He knew if he brought up the fact that our child could have been suffering from that fatal disease that I couldn’t just say no.

  Jamie picked up the little white gift bag that he brought in with him from off the floor, then set it on the countertop.

  I sat my coffee cup down, looking at the bag and then looking back at him.

  He grinned a little.

  I hesitated before walking back over to the island where he sat. I looked at him as I dug through the paper to get to whatever was in the bag. And I felt it before I grabbed it out of the bag. It felt so soft and smooth in my hands. I pulled out the nicest, prettiest, sexiest little white dress I’d ever seen. It was a form-fitting silk Versace dress. I could picture myself in that dress. I knew it would look like it was painted on my skin. I loved it, and I just held it tight against my chest.

  “Oh my gosh, I love this!” I wanted to say that I loved him. I should have put that shit back in the bag and gave it back to him, but I didn’t. All that trash talking I did to Ne’Vaeh for taking that dress from Aaron, now I know how she felt. There’s nothing like a man who knows your taste.

  “You got plans tonight, shawty?” Jamie grinned, watching me eyeing the dress.

  I looked at him, “I do now.”

  * * *

  No, I shouldn’t have gone out with Jamie that night, but you know every bit of attention he gave me soothed my soul. The cancer benefit was an emotional one. There were so many little girls there who had little to no hair. I cried as I talked to them, and most of them played in my hair, admiring it. Jamie and I both gave a huge donation to the National Cancer Society that night. I also paid to have wigs custom made for all the little girls there who suffered hair loss. It broke my heart to hear them crying and thanking me for caring about them. If it hadn’t of been for Jamie, I would have never gone. That boy was seriously playing with my heart.

  I did a lot of mingling and saw a lot of familiar faces. There were so many women there who I knew but had no idea of the disease that they were fighting. I even ran into Misty Daniels. You know when I saw that girl I had to pull her to the side.

  “Misty Daniels?” I squealed behind her.

  She turned around from the circle of people that she was talking to. Her eyes lit up when she saw me. She came from a rich family. She was pretty and country as hell, straight out of Arkansas. She was the loudest white girl I’d ever met in my life, outside of my mother and her sisters.

  “Hey, bih! What up, chick?” Misty threw he
r arms around me.

  We ended up outside of the hotel, smoking some medicinal marijuana that Misty brought with her in her Marc Jacobs purse. Turns out, she had retinoblastoma, cancer of the retina. She lost vision in one eye, and could barely see out of the other. No wonder her damn medicine cabinet looked like a pharmacy back when we were in high school.

  Misty passed the blunt to me, sitting on a bench outside of the Hilton. “Girl, what the fuck you doing here with Jamie Green?”

  I looked at her, inhaling as much of that good shit as I could. I held it in before exhaling it through my nose, little by little. “Girl, it’s a long story. Trust me.”

  Misty shook her head at me while taking the blunt out of my hand. “I see. I saw li’l Ne’Vaeh on TV with Aaron a few weeks ago. Did you know his grandfather is passing down his diamond mine business to that boy? Ne’Vaeh doesn’t ever gotta work another got-damn day in her got-damn life! You must’ve been out your mind to let that boy slip through your fingers!” She took a few puffs in. “But then again, he was never yours to begin with. Everyone but you knew he liked that girl.”

  I shook my head at her. I sighed. I didn’t feel like discussing Ne’Vaeh or Aaron’s ass. I looked at her. “When is the last time you had one of your parties, girl?”

  Misty laughed a little. “Girl, since the time my brother’s friends robbed my house lookin’ for my stash. The last party I had was in 2014. Girl, you don’t remember my party in 2014? Y’all muthafuckas drank up every got-damn bottle of alcohol in my house, that’s probably why you don’t remember! Or should I say can’t remember! Everybody got fucked up, especially when my brothers spiked the green punch with all types of shit. You and a few of your friends were gone, I’m tellin’ you.”

  I looked at her, “Few of what friends?”

  Misty looked at me, giggling at my memory loss. “Girl, half the got-damn dance squad! My brothers put Molly, liquid morphine, Rohypnol, Ecstasy, e’ry got-damn thang in that drink! Y’all know better than to drink anything my brothers make! I don’t even know how y’all made it home safe! Come to think of it, I think Ashton’s ass took you home. He had drank some of that green punch, too, but I’m pretty sure it didn’t hit him until he got you back to his place.”