He moved swiftly around the house and then down the path Payton had seen inside her mind. God, Sienna must be locked in incredible pain. To see someone you love die over and over again, and be able to do nothing to stop it. It was no wonder she had so many walls built up around her. He was sure most people wouldn’t even survive as long as Sienna had.
A fleck of light in the distance caught his eye and Jace went from a jog to an all-out run. Sienna was there! She was sitting out in a field, all on her own, and she was suffering. As he got closer, he could see the wisps of gray surrounding her. They flew about her head like a large cloud, growing darker and thicker until she was almost locked away entirely behind a cloud of dense smoke. He had to get in there, push his way through, before she closed it off entirely. He added another burst of speed, leaping over rocks and nearly crashing into a cactus. Damn, he was close—so close he could see a few strands of blonde hair, creeping out through the mental fog. “Sienna!” Just a few feet more.
At the sound of his voice, Sienna jolted. The fog moved with her, swirling and moving in his direction. She could hear him! He moved around to the front of the gray swirls and pushed, expecting it to part like fog on the road on a cold night, but his hand almost bounced back at the force. Fuck, this thing—whatever the hell it was—was solid. He moved around to the front and pressed both palms up against it. “Sienna, you can’t do this to yourself. You’ve got to stop.” He had to find a way to calm her down. “Let me in, please. Before you kill yourself.” The fog pushed back and Jace felt a thin shiver of electricity run over his fingers. “Sienna, please.” He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter what you’re seeing in there. I’m still here, and I’m not leaving. Remember? I’ll never leave you.”
The fog opened up for a split second and Jace felt a sort of sucking on his mind before everything closed up behind him again. He raised his eyes. Where the fuck had the field gone? He was on his hands and knees, but instead of rocks and grass beneath him, there were wooden floorboards. In front of him was a set of stairs, with a small latch on the storage door. But no Sienna.
Jace moved forward, pushing open the door. He knew where he was. Inside there was her mind’s home, her sanctuary. But when the door swung open, there were no tea parties or coloring. Instead the floor, the walls—everywhere was covered in a thick pool of blood. Maggie’s blood. He knew it instinctively, as if it were his own memory. But this wasn’t a memory. Not entirely, at least. Stained crayon drawings floated in puddles of red and the walls were scored with claw marks. It was as if a small child had died there, like someone had ripped an infant from her mother’s arms and destroyed all that was good about the world. Sweat ran down his neck and his hands clenched. That’s exactly what had happened. Sienna’s mom may have thought she was doing the right thing, and maybe she had been when Sienna was young. But for her this was nothing but a betrayal from the one she loved most of all—the very essence of pain. It was sticking at him, stinging so badly that he could barely force himself to his feet and wade through the fog that was locking itself around his ankles. He did it anyway. Sienna was inside there—somewhere—drowning in the thick sludge of her memories and grief.
“Sienna!” he called out. It was so dark he couldn’t see much of anything. “Please, grab onto me.”
There was no answer. He pushed in further, ignoring the way the blood sloshed up against the walls. A doll crunched under his feet, already broken, her dress torn. A bear pushed up against the wall was holding a butcher’s knife. “Sienna, please! It doesn’t have to be this way.”
“But it does.”
Her voice echoed in his mind, thin and low. He couldn’t see her, but he could feel the blood under his shoes, squelching with every step he took. “Where are you?” She didn’t answer, but a bright light flared across the room, lighting his path for moments. He was in the near center of a vast space. He held his hands out, feeling for the edges. The space was black and looked endless, but when he took a step, his fingers brushed against something. It felt rough, almost like canvas.
“Stop.” Her voice was quiet and high, as if he were talking to a small, scared child.
Jace ran his hands along the fabric, finding an edge. It was slanted, like a play tent. “You don’t want me to come in?”
Sienna whimpered. “No. No one’s allowed in here.”
He moved his hands along the edges. Definitely a tent, and yet he could see nothing. Was the entire thing, the tent, the darkness—everything—constructed within Sienna’s mind? “Will you come out for awhile and talk to me?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t want to leave,” she said. “This was our place. It was our place and now it’s ruined.”
He heard a rustle, as if she were moving. Were they moving in the real world? He had no idea, but if he didn’t figure out how to get them both out here soon, well—it couldn’t be good. The rest he’d figure out once he’d helped Sienna find herself in the darkness. “What ruined it, Sienna?”
“She did!” Her voice boomed in his mind. “She lied to me! She had years to tell me the truth and she never did.” Her voice dropped again and she snuffled. “Now she’s dead.”
Jace’s heart cracked at the tone of her voice. She sounded so lost, so alone. Could she even see him? A warm drop of liquid landed on his forehead. He reached up. It smeared thickly across his skin. Blood? In answer to his question, whatever was on the floor now sloshed about his ankles. His eyes went wide. Just how real was this? “Sienna, we have to go!”
“I can’t leave her here. She’s all alone.” Her voice was quiet again, but different. Like she was moving away.
Another drop, then another, until they were coming in torrents, coating his face. He had to get them the fuck out of there. He reached into the tent, his hands searching through the blackness. Desperate, he called out again. “Sienna!” He heard nothing, but his fingers brushed against something again. Soft this time, a shirt! He grabbed hold of it and pulled as hard as he could. For a moment it was as if the entire world jolted. He landed on his back, hard, and closed his eyes against the sudden blinding light. His arm instinctively went up to protect his head until he realized that what he was seeing was sunlight. The hard surface beneath him was the earth. Jace exhaled loudly. They were out! Or at least, he was.
His eyes flew open as he sat up, searching wildly. Had he been able to drag Sienna out of her own mind’s trap with him? He almost collapsed again in relief when he spotted her, lying a few feet away. She was still, but her chest rose and fell. She was breathing, thank God. He rolled over and scrambled over to her. As he leaned over her, Sienna’s eyes fluttered open. “Jace?”
He pulled her up and against him, resting her back on his chest. He wrapped her in his arms, holding her around the waist. One of her hands rested on his knee. He’d handcuff himself to her if that would prevent her getting stuck somewhere like that again. “Are you okay? Where the hell were we?”
Her head dropped back against his shoulder. “It was my place to hide. In the file, my mom said she hid me away from the bitch that did this to us, in a closet. When I was a kid, she made a space in the under-stair storage where I could hide away. She told me that any time I felt unsafe, or there was someone in the house I didn’t know, I could run in there and hide away.” The hand on his knee tightened, until he could feel her nails digging into his skin. He didn’t move. “If she’d only told me what was going on! If I’d known what that space was really for, I might have been able to protect her. Instead, I was left completely in the dark.” She hiccupped, the tears beginning again. “She didn’t tell me, Jace, and then they killed her.”
God, would she ever stop breaking his heart? “It’s done, Sienna. I know it hurts, but you can’t relive it over and over like that.” He hunched over, resting his cheek against hers, the wetness from her tears slicking against his skin. “Damn it, that was as real as it gets. You keep this up, it’s going to kill you.”
Sienn
a sucked in a harsh breath. Every muscle in her body tensed. “No, Jace. This power, I have it for a reason. My mom gave her life for this, so I could stop Isobel. It’s not going to kill me, but I’m going to use it to kill her.”
26
Sienna
Sienna’s vision grew hazy as the light built within her again. The world was fuzzy at the edges, but then someone grabbed ahold of her hand, squeezing hard. Jace. This time, the vision hadn’t drained her as much. She still had a little physical strength, but her heart wasn’t in it. Her anger had washed away, leaving her with a deep pit of sadness. But she didn’t want to leave him again, didn’t want to be by herself in the whirling blackness anymore. She squeezed back. “All this stuff keeps going through my head, tugging and pulling at me. I can’t control it.”
“You will.” He was so close his breath whispered against her skin. “It’s not just about you and your mom anymore.” He tilted his head back in the direction of the house. “You’ve got every one of the girls in that house behind you. Hell, you’ve got me wherever you want me. You don’t have to do any of this alone.”
She shook her head. “My mom said I was the key. I was the one who had to stop it all.” The haze swam in her vision again. “She didn’t tell me a fucking thing. I’m out here in the desert with no answers, and I’m so angry that even my damn thoughts are taking over the world!”
“She loved you, Sienna. I’m sure of that. We all make mistakes, but in the end, I think she was trying to protect you.” He shrugged. “Was it misguided? Maybe. But it was done out of love.”
She closed her eyes, allowing the warmth from the sun, and from Jace’s body pressed against her, to keep her grounded. “I know. It’s just—I—Jace, it’s too much. I don’t want to feel like this, the grief and anger, but I can’t switch it off.”
“Then keep it, but use it. Use it to fight back, to survive.”
She tensed. The swirling vortex of clouds was still hovering on the edges of her mind. Disappearing back inside there scared the crap out of her. She’d wanted to retreat, to just go back to where everything was safe again. It had backfired, big time. Her mind had been so full of anger, so full of grief, that she would likely have lost herself inside her own head if Jace hadn’t been able to push his way through. She stared out to the skyline, clenching her jaw. There wasn’t anywhere to hide in the real world. She’d run, thinking she hadn’t left a single trail, and yet Keila had found her, followed swiftly by the men in the car. They’d been waiting for her in her motel room! By some miracle she’d managed to fight them off. That only meant that the blonde woman wouldn’t be far behind.
Isobel.
Sienna forced herself to think her name. If she was going to face her head-on, if she really was what her mother had intended, then she at least had to be able to think the bitch’s name.
“Imagine if you could use all that pain,” Jace whispered. “Don’t let it beat you, but take it, ball it, up and shoot it out. They wouldn’t stand a chance.”
The energy whirled in Sienna’s head, spinning and whipping around until she saw sparks crackle and fizz in the evening light. She closed her eyes and, forcing her mind to focus, reached out and grabbed at it. The ball of energy stopped directly in front of her eyes, hovering in place. She tugged on it, pushing and folding until it collapsed into an impossibly tight ball. It shimmered right in front of her eyes like a tiny star, the light reflecting back onto her. Could Jace see it too, or was all of this in her mind?
“There you go, Sweetheart. I knew you could do it.” His words made her jolt and Jace chuckled, tapping her on the side of her head. “Just don’t get so lost in there that I can’t find you. I need you, Sienna.”
His words shocked her, pushing into her gut. They stayed there, settling in slowly until she pushed aside some of the darkness that had lived inside her ever since the day she found her mom. His lips brushed the top of her head, then her ear, trailing down her neck. Each touch added a little more light, until a burning grew deep inside her. His mouth licked and nibbled at her as his hands moved over her, stroking her arms leisurely, then across her shoulders, her back. A shiver ran through her and the heat grew again. They sat there, Jace’s mouth and hands never leaving her body as the sun fell down, mixing with the baby blue of the sky. First a soft orange glow, then a blazing procession that faded into lavender and finally navy blue. The air temperature dropped, but the heat inside Sienna’s body blazed. She turned her head, looking into his eyes. “Let’s go back to your room.”
“Okay.” He took her hand, guiding her across the rocky field until they reached the grass path. Jace slung an arm around her shoulders and they walked back to the house. Her skin tingled wherever it touched his body and she smiled. They were like any normal couple, taking a walk at sunset before . . . she bit her lip. Was she ready for this? Jace had made it more than clear that he was interested in sticking around, but as her lover? Had he changed his mind since the big reveal earlier? Was the arm around her shoulders nothing but him playing at protective big brother?
As if he heard her thoughts, he leaned over and dropped a kiss on her temple. His hand tightened on her shoulder, turning her around to face him. Cupping her face in his hands, his gaze burned into hers before he dropped his mouth to hers, taking her lips in a swift kiss. She moaned and he pulled her tightly against him, pushing his tongue inside her mouth even as his erection pushed against her belly. Her body was trembling again, but this time the light bathing her mind was warm, welcoming. It made her feel comforted, even safe. Jace ground his hips into hers, thrusting his tongue and swirling with hers. In her mind, Sienna pictured him naked, proud and erect, thrusting into her. Before the thought was even fully formed, Jace shuddered, his lips pulling away from hers, and he let out a load groan. “Sienna, my God. Do that again.”
What? She opened her eyes and fell against him, her knees nearly buckling with surprise. The air around their bodies twinkled, as if lit by a thousand fireflies. It pulsed, and a gentle warmth flowed over her. Her eyebrows hitched in confusion. “Jace?”
“I saw it, Sienna.” He groaned again, taking her mouth again. He kissed her deeply, sucking on her lip and then biting before finally releasing her. “I saw every damn thing you want to do with my body, and Baby, I’m all yours.”
At his words, an entire erotic movie played out in her mind. Every time she’d pushed him away, or wouldn’t let herself take even the smallest hint of pleasure—that hadn’t meant she’d reined in her imagination. And by the look on his face, Jace was seeing it all. Him kissing her, stripping her, then laying her down. Would he take his time, kissing every inch of her before finally taking her under him and thrusting deep? Maybe he’d take her hard and fast from behind or against a wall? Her heart pounded as the images flashed through her mind, her body quivering with desire.
Suddenly, the world tilted and the ground disappeared beneath her. “Oh, no you don’t, Sweetheart,” Jace said. His hands were under her ass, holding her firmly to him as he wrapped her legs around his waist. The position put her core directly over the hard bulge in his jeans, and wetness slicked her sex. “You’re not disappearing into your mind again, even if I’m sure we’d enjoy it a hell of a lot more this time.” He strode forward, bypassing the front door altogether and walking around the back. Removing one hand from her only to twist the doorknob on the glass patio doors leading to his bedroom, he walked inside and dropped her on the bed. His hands landed next to her on the quilt as he slid himself down until their gaze met again. “This is going to be for real.”
His hands touched the bed on either side of her head, his muscular arms caging her in. She bit her lip. Jace would do nothing to hurt her; he’d proven that many times over. Still, lying over her, his hard cock pressing into her body even as his hands moved to cradle her head . . . was she ready for this? Back in the field, he’d been inside her damn head, and yet this seemed more intimate, more real. If she let him inside her, there’d be no going back. He’d be by her
side for whatever came next, and she would be making the choice to let him. She shifted, breathing in sharply when her core brushed over his erection. The drag of the rough fabric sent sparks and shivers through her. She gazed at him, searching his face. He looked so self-assured, so confident. Was he nervous about what was coming next at all? Not the sex—the way he was touching her, she wanted him inside her more than she wanted her next breath. But what came after that? A killer could be stalking her right at this moment.
A gentle kiss landed on her cheek, followed by Jace trailing his tongue back to her ear, pulling the lobe between his teeth and sucking lightly. “Stay out of your head, Sienna. I want you here.”
She looked up into his eyes. Desire and arousal were dancing in them, almost making them glow. Her eyes widened at the heat contained within them. “Jace, I don’t know how to do this—to let you see all of me.” She didn’t mean her body, and from the expression on his face, he knew it, too. His hand moved to caress her hair as his lips trailing over her neck, before moving to whisper in her ear. “Let me show you.”
His hand moved from her head, drifting over her collarbone, before settling on her breast. He stroked it, once, twice, before brushing his thumb over her nipple. The touch went straight to her sex and Sienna arched her hips, pressing against him. She didn’t know why, maybe their earlier connection in the field had changed things, but everything was stronger now. Every touch sent heat spiraling through her.
Jace growled against her neck, but his lips never left her skin. His hand continued lower, giving her only seconds’ reprieve before he reached the hem of her shirt. Without pausing, he slid his hand under, pressing his warm palm against the bare skin of her belly. She jolted at the touch and he responded by moving back to her mouth for another dragging, all-consuming kiss. His tongue tangled with hers, sucking it into his mouth as his hand moved against her skin, caressing her before cupping her breast and squeezing. He kissed her, long and deep, while teasing her breast until her nipple was a hard nub, then he moved to the other. Jace took his time, working her into a writhing mess beneath him.
Sienna (Dreamcatchers Romantic Suspense Series Book 5) Page 15
