Stroke Of Fear

by Kar, Alla

  Eric snorts. “What an ass. They come by the dozens around here, though. Where you from anyway?”

  “Arkansas.”

  “Is your sister your cousin?”

  “Shut up.”

  He laughs and slaps my back. “Dude, I’m joking. Calm down. I’m sure the girls will love that accent. Girls love accents.”

  I try not to smile. It’s so damn hard not to like Eric. I tried, believe me. I don’t normally hang out while I’m working. Eric looks like a kid that would get you into trouble. Yesterday when we first got here I ignored him, but he followed me around talking. The entire day. So, I gave up.

  The cafeteria is like a mess hall. There are rows of tables with benches along each side, a line for the food like in high school, snack machines and outside sitting. The actual building is wood, like the cabins. It’s nice. Homey almost.

  We get our food and take a table toward the front of the building. The food isn’t as bad as I had planned. The cheese burger isn’t the worst I’ve had either.

  “Oh, cripple at three o clock.”

  Glancing over my shoulder, I see Aubrey walk through the doors. Regardless that she’s with the asshat, I can’t take my eyes off of her. Her short khaki shorts, are….ridiculously short. Not to mention the tight, blue polo. It’s snug across her chest. Goddamn. My dick gets hard thinking about it. I nonchalantly try to adjust myself. Grumbling, I turn to face my food. From what I could tell, she’s pissed off at me because I called her out on her swimming. The girl can swim. I saw it in her. Those long, tanned legs look like they were made for swimming—or to wrap around my waist.

  “Girls don’t like when you stare. Well, not if they’re crippled.”

  “She’s not crippled, and I’m not staring.” She was limping on her left side. She hit those rocks fucking hard. I take a huge bite of my burger and swallow it slowly.

  Eric shoves half of his in his face and laughs through the food. “I saw you checking her out, even when she was half-unconscious yesterday. Do you not have any shame?”

  “Says the guy inhaling his food.”

  He barks out a laugh. “Well, looks like it’s your lucky day.”

  Frowning, I glance over my shoulder. Aubrey, her friend and Asshat are walking over toward our table. Aubrey barely puts any weight on her left side. It must really be hurting. Her gaze flickers up toward mine, and she stops. She takes her bottom lip between her teeth and pulls. Fuck, she has no idea how sexy that is. But her friend is dragging her along. She hasn’t stopped talking since they left the line.

  “What’s up?” Eric says, tossing his head toward the three of them. Our table squeaks underneath their weight.

  Her friend helps Aubrey down on the other side of her. She waves. “I’m Cassie.”

  Eric offers her his hand. “Eric. Who’s your friends?”

  “This is Aubrey and this is—”

  “I can talk for myself, Cassie,” Asshat snaps. “I’m Jake.” He doesn’t offer a nod, or even a fucking glance. Pretty boy is gonna have to be taken down a fuckin’ notch.

  “Well, obviously you guys know Tanner.”

  Jake snorts and starts to shovel food into his mouth. He’s your stereotypical football player. Big. Muscular. And his personality hits the nail on the damn head.

  Aubrey hasn’t looked up from her food, and I can tell she’s pissed. “Your side okay?”

  Biting her lip—again, fuck—she gives me a little nod. My back molars grind hard against one another. I can’t understand why, but I want her to talk to me.

  “She’s fine,” Asshat says.

  I grunt. “She can talk for herself.”

  “She obviously doesn’t want to, Country,” Asshat says, slamming his clenched fists down on the table.

  “Shut up.” Aubrey snaps her jaw tight. “I don’t want to talk to either one of you. So shut the hell up.” She keeps her eyes on the table, but I see the pink underneath her cheeks. Her dirty blonde hair is covering most of it, but I see it.

  Damn. Keeping my composure, I let out an exasperated sigh. “That’s the thank you I get for saving your life?”

  “Maybe I didn’t want to be saved. Ever think of that?” she blurts out.

  The table is quiet. Eerily quiet. Jake reaches across and tries to grab her hand, but she retracts it underneath the table. “You don’t mean that.”

  She shrugs. “Eat your food.”

  I pick up my cheeseburger and eat the rest quickly. Eric picks up conversation with Cassie, dominating the silence. I’m glad, because, I have nothing to say. I can’t think of anything that wouldn’t piss her off. After a few long minutes Aubrey stands up.

  “Don’t get up,” she says as Jake moves from his seat. “I need to be alone.”

  Jake wants to follow. I see that puppy dog look in his eye. Instead, he sits back down and taps his fingers against the wood of our table.

  “Give her time, Jake. She obviously has problems with the water,” Cassie says, tossing back her brown hair.

  “Well, I’ve been dating her for four years—”

  “On and off,” Cassie interrupts.

  He flips her off and continues. “Four years and she’s never said anything about the water. I wish I would have known. I wouldn’t have pushed her off.”

  You shouldn’t have pushed her off, anyway, asshole.

  I pick up my plate after finishing and toss it in the trash. I don’t wait on Eric. I don’t want to. I need silence, and that guy is not silent. I push open the double doors and the humid air blows against my skin. It isn’t a relief of cool air, but the breeze still feels nice. Tugging at my shirt, I unbutton the top few buttons. These damn things are hot as hell. A few campers have arrived early; they’re not supposed to be here until tonight. We’ll be introduced to them tomorrow. Some of the girls are giggling, covering their mouths and pointing at me. I roll my eyes. Both of them are jailbait. I wouldn’t touch ‘em with a damn ten foot pole.

  I’m jogging up the steps to my cabin when I hear a soft cry. It’s gentle, barely there. I stop and listen just to make sure I heard it. Sniffle. Yep, definitely tears. I have an older sister, too. I know what a girl crying sounds like.

  I jump off the porch and ease around the side of the cabin. No one is there. Then I check behind the girls’ building. There she is, sitting down against the wood, her head shoved into her knees.

  Fuck. I hate when girls cry. It makes me…uneasy. I take a few steps toward her and slips down beside her. “Hi.”

  “What the…? Jesus…” she trails off. Realizing she’s been crying, she wipes away her tears. “What do you want? I said I needed some time to myself.”

  I grab a fist full of dirt and let it slip through my fist. “No one wants to be alone,” I say.

  Her hazel eyes widen. “Well, I do.”

  I shrug and continue to let dirt filter through my fist.

  She groans. “Thank you for saving me yesterday. Is that why you’re here right now? You want a thank you?”

  I have no fucking idea why I’m here right now. “No. Just offering a shoulder.”

  She retracts at the word. Now she thinks I’m a creep. “Well, thanks but I’m good.”

  Her chest starts rising and falling at a quicker pace. My eyes drop to her chest and the hideous blue polo. I want to see her out of it so bad. God, stay focused, Tanner. I scratch my chin and avert my eyes. “Sure. I’m sure you’re grand. You really look put together.”

  “Fucking bastard,” she says beneath her breath. With the building’s help, she scrambles upright. “How dare you come over here and make fun of me.”

  I get to my feet and look down at her. The wind picks up her scent and blows the lavender against me. She smells so good. “I’m not the one lying about being able to swim. I know you can. I see the fear in your eyes. Not to mention, not telling your boyfriend of four years you can’t swim. Or about the accident.”

  She balls her hands into fists and crinkles her nose. It’s ridiculously hot, but I keep my m
ind focused on what we’re talking about. “I didn’t have an acc—”

  “Bullshit. You did, and that’s the reason why you can’t swim. You’re afraid. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, just admit—” She slaps me. Right across my fucking face.

  Mt eyes widen. I don’t move, I stare down at her. Tears stream down her face. She reaches back to do it again, but I grab her wrist. Her eyes widen and she tries to jerk away from me.

  “Don’t you ever hit me again,” I say, letting her wrist fall to her side.

  “I…” she trails off, more tears building in her eyes. She turns and runs. I don’t stop her.

  Chapter Three

  Aubrey

  “Get up. You have to get a shower.”

  I groan and pull my comforter over my head. It can’t be seven already. It feels like I just shut my eyes. “Ten more minutes.”

  Cassie mumbles something and pulls the covers off of me. “Hey!” I screech, grabbing for my sheets. I curl into a ball and bury my head in my knees.

  “Get up, or I’m going to get Jake.”

  I sit up in the bed and glance around. Cassie is already dressed, her hair nicely straightened. I told her there was no need in doing that, the humid California sun is going to frizz it out. “I’m getting up.”

  She gives me a triumphant smile walks over to the mirror hanging on her closet door. Gathering my clothes, I sit on my bed and rub my eyes. “I’m beginning to think this was a bad idea.”

  Cassie snorts and brushes through her chestnut hair. “Puh-lease. All the hours. The money. The hot co-counselors.” She wiggles her eyebrows in the mirror.

  Hot co-counselors. I bite my tongue to keep from drooling. Clearing my throat, I glance over at her. “Well, speaking of hot co-counselors…I slapped one in the face yesterday.”

  She turns on her heel, her mascara dropping and rolling under her bed. “You’re shitting me? Who? Wait”—a grin crawls up her face—“Tanner?”

  “Bingo.”

  “What. The. Hell? You slapped him? Why? Was it a sexy slap? Did he push you against something and kiss the heck out of you?”

  I frown. “Uh, no. He didn’t really do anything. I just got so mad. He followed me behind the building—”

  She gasps and drops down on her knees, fumbling for her mascara. “You mean when he left he went looking for you? Hot damn. Tell me everything. What did he say?”

  I stand and stretch. “I was getting to that part. He was so…contradicting. He said I was lying about being able to swim. It pissed me off. So, I slapped him. Then I tried to do it again but he grabbed my wrist and told me not to ever do it again.”

  “Jesus. This is going to be the best summer yet. What happened after that?”

  I shrug. “I left.”

  Cassie frowns and tosses her makeup bag on her bed. “Well, there’s still two months to go. We have plenty of time. What are you going to do about Jake?”

  I reach for my caddy underneath my bed. “What about him?”

  “Are you two an item? I mean he did push you off a cliff. Not that he was trying to kill you or anything…but still.”

  Sighing, I run my fingers through my hair. Christ, I need a shower. “We’re not anything right now. At least, not that I know of. I’m not sure I want to be…I mean, we’re just not compatible anymore. I feel like I grew up and he didn’t.”

  Cassie snorts. “That’s because that’s exactly what happened.” A loud siren goes off through the camp, and I cover my ears. “Yikes, thirty minutes. You better take a whore bath. Hurry.” She pushes me toward our bathroom.

  ***

  The auditorium is packed with kids. I thought we’d have a big turnout, but I wasn’t expecting hundreds. Most are around fourteen or fifteen; I’m sure trying to get away from their parents for the summer. We’re all standing on stage, hands behind our backs. The kids are eyeing us up and down. I try not to groan.

  Mrs. Jones comes out, clapping her hands over her head. “Hello, Campers! Let’s show some love for Camp Awesome!” Wow, she’s that irritating kind of person who has all the energy in the world, no matter what time of day it is. Everyone pretends to like them, but really wants to reach over and strangle them to death each morning.

  A soft roar of applause echoes through the building. “These are our camp counselors for the summer. They’re going to introduce themselves to you!”

  Shit. Could she have not warned us? All the other camp counselors start their introductions. When it gets to Cassie, she steps out and waves her hand. “I’m Cassie. This summer is going to rock, you guys!” A few guys let out wolf whistles, and she eats it up, giving the audience a finger wave.

  Really, Cassie? Everyone turns to face me and I give a small wave. “I’m Aubrey.”

  “Take your shirt off!” some guy yells.

  “Watch your mouth!” Mrs. Jones yells, pointing a finger at a blond boy sitting in the front row. He blows us a kiss.

  Great. The rest of the staff introduces themselves and then we get to sit down. Jake tries to help me, but I pull my arm from his grip.

  “Okay, I passed out all of your schedules during orientation when you checked in. We’re going to start the first activities right after lunch. Meet your instructors in the assigned location on your schedules. If you have any questions, find one of the counselors, or myself, and ask. We’re here to help. Let’s have an awesome summer!”

  ***

  Cassie places her plate down next to mine. “Um, this spaghetti looks gross.”

  I snort and take a bite. “It’s not too bad.”

  She scrunches up her nose and eats it anyway. “Ex-boyfriend…I mean ‘it’s complicated’ is walking toward us.”

  I don’t look up. “Hmm,” I mumble.

  Jake takes the seat next to me. “You didn’t answer my calls last night. I even came by.”

  “I was asleep, Jake. Cassie told you I was.”

  He glances over at me, his brown eyes wide. Don’t look him in the eyes. It’s like looking at Puss In Boots when he’s little eyes are all round and pathetic. “I was just making sure you’re okay. I mean…you kind of had a hard day yesterday. I’m really sorry for throwing you off. I didn’t know.”

  Of course he didn’t. He barely knows anything about me. And we’ve been off and on for four fucking years. In his defense, I didn’t tell him. But, my mind bobs back to Tanner. He knew without me saying a damn word.

  “It’s okay,” I lie.

  Cassie hums the Jeopardy theme song under her breath until I feel something touch the side of my head. “What the…?” I glance back. The blond boy from the assembly this morning is standing behind me, his hand running along my hair.

  “Excuse you,” I snap.

  He laughs. He must be the oldest camper here. Seventeen? “Hi, lovely. I saw you checking me out from the stage today. I’m turning eighteen in a month. You and me should get together. Like gorillas.”

  What. The. Hell. Gorillas?

  “Hey, back off, kid,” Jake says, shooing him away with his hand.

  “My name is Austin. You can call me anything. Or just call me.” He winks.

  “I don’t date underage children.”

  “Told you, eighteen in a month.”

  Cassie is laughing hysterically underneath her breath. Jake stands, towering over him. “Get lost, kid. I won’t say it again.”

  Austin is wiggling his eyebrows up and down when he suddenly stops.

  “Leave her alone.” I follow his gaze to Tanner. I take a sharp breath in without thinking about it. Holy Fuck. How does he make that camp uniform look so damn sexy? The blue polo is tight around his chest and arms. The khakis hang lowly on his hips, leaving you wondering what her looks like underneath them. His jaw is tight but then his eyes dart toward mine. Shit, he saw me looking. A smile crawls dangerously slow up one side of his strong jaw.

  Bastard.

  “We’ve got this taken care of,” Jake snaps. “Back off.”

  Tanner laughs. “No, you don’t. T
his is my little brother, Austin. And believe me, he wasn’t goin’ away anytime soon.”

  Austin smiles. “Dude’s right. I wasn’t budging.”

  Jake clenches his jaw. I can feel the heat radiating off of him.

  “Go sit down, now,” Tanner says.

  Austin rolls his eyes and motions for me to call him.

  Cassie starts laughing out loud as soon as he leaves. “He’s kin to you? I don’t see a resemblance at all.”

  “Half-brother. We have the same Mom but different Dads. He lives here in California.”

  Jake chucks a piece of bread down on his plate. “How precious. You’re coming to camp with your little brother.”

  The small smile is back, and it’s amusement. His gray eyes dart toward mine. He holds my gaze. I don’t dare look away. I refuse to give him the satisfaction of him knowing I’m uncomfortable or that I’ve been checking him out. He winks and then he turns and walks away. I bite the inside of my cheek, hard. I want to throw my spaghetti at him.

  Cassie nudges me underneath the table but I keep my head down.

  “I can’t fucking stand that asshole,” Jake mumbles.

  You and me both.

  ***

  The soccer field is set up just outside of the gym. Cassie and I set up cones and get the bag of balls scattered onto the field.

  “Damn it, I didn’t realize this was going to be so much work,” Cassie huffs out, blowing her bangs from her forehead.

  “You didn’t think being a camp counselor for the summer would be work?”

  She shrugs. “It looked like a good idea at the time.” She tugs the bag to the side and then kicks it.

  “What did that bag ever do to you?”

  Turning around, I see Austin standing with his foot placed on top of a soccer ball. His blond hair is messy, and he has this grin that would make any sixteen-year-old girl swoon.

  Cassie rolls her eyes. “Why don’t you make yourself useful and start to put some more cones down?”

  Screwing his lips upwards, he kicks the ball and starts to bounce it off of his knee. “Isn’t that your job?”

  Rolling my eyes, I turn and go over our clipboard. Damn it. He’s with us for this activity. “Hey, Blondie, you’re the one that fell into the water, right?”