"What you mean they hate you!? You they mama ... I'm the one to hate. I - I should'dah least come back for them ... that's ... that's my fault. That ain't yo'fault. Leavin' you, ain't mean I have to leave them too. You ain't the only one - have to grow up. Regret. Wish - well ... I - I wish I hadn't left. Didn't seem you care-..."
"I loved you Lucas ... I was just so so stupid. I love you now ... I do ... I look at you now, and even here in the dark ... I can tell, you done well. Seen your name in the yellow pages. You got one of them big-O-ads. I looked it up and thought - that's my husband right there." She smiled up at him. Hearing her say that meant a lot to Lucas, because it was something she'd never said or done before. Praised him or took pride in what he'd worked so hard to do, all the times in the past, his best had never been good enough. For her to say that, was saying something. He stood there staring down at her in the low lit room. While he stood just a bit on the tall side of 5'10, she was only 5'2.
"You was always a better person than me Lucas."
"Not so ... you stayed wit' my kids ... I left. How that make me better?"
"I may'ah stayed, but - they wasn't happy with me ... 'cause I wasn't happy without you. Too many years angry 'cause you didn't come back. Too many years mad at myself when I had to face the truth. Now - I got nobody Lucas ... nobody ... well - save for my Sylvie."
"Whoooeee ain't she somethin' now?" He asked grinning.
"You see her Lucas? And you know what... she can si-i-i-ing! Lord! That child can sing like I never could."
"I'on know about that now - you could sing too." He was softening without knowing it.
"Not like her Lucas ... I went to see her sing the other night, she give me goose bumps and make me cry. She somethin' t'be proud of."
They stood in the semi-dark kitchen and finally quieted. Standing close, realizing what the other was saying, realizing they were actually together and listening to one another. Lydia felt her heart thumping so in her chest it made her breathless, tears rushed to her eyes and she pleaded softly on a breathless whisper. "Don't turn me out Lucas. I swear you do i's gone kill me." She sucked in unable to stop herself from crying. "I'm a old silly woman, with little left of-..."
"Hush now - I'on wanna hear that nonsense - you a good lookin' woman. Prettier now - than back when you use to - to wear all the junk on ya'face! All them wigs."
"I don't wear'em no more Lucas ... what you see ... well, its what you get ... if ... you want it. I want what I see, more than ever ... I want what I see."
She moved closer to him, now glad that the lights were down low. Her hands rose to his chest as she slanted her face up, offering him the chance to take what she offered. "I'm a ol'man now ... you sho' this what you want?"
"You ain't that ol' Lucas ... I know you not. And when you are, I pray to God - it's with me. We ain't got that much longer - let's do the rest - right. Let's do it together, please ... I ain't too proud to beg you ... not no'mo... I'm done with the foolishness of pride... my fall - has hurt - like nothin' ever hurt before."
His thick, swollen knuckled fingers rose and touched her cheek, using one to brush a tear.
"You tell me Lucas, what I got to do? Just say the words... I'll do - I'll do anything Lucas - for you... just ... say the words." Just then his stomach growled long and deep.
They both laughed.
"Them goddamn barbecue pig feet ... it was over when I move that foil back." He grumbled. "An' I - I ain' never - ask nothing o'you - that meant bringin' you down. I ain' never wanna hurt you. Hurt my kids. I - I see - I ain' blin' you know ... I see - where - well - I should'ah put my foot down wit'you! I didn't cause - I ain't think you love me. Have no respect fo'me. I just ..."
"Don't say no more, you ain't got to explain. Why'on't you eat? Lucas... them pig feet, they go-o-od, and tenda-a-ah ... melt in your mouth. Let me turn the light on and feed you." She asked temptingly.
"Right now, we gone leave'em off ... an' you can feed me later ... much later... that's what I want you t'do."
Lydia thought her heart would explode. "Whatever you say Lucas, whatever you say."
Chapter 139
Jake and his sons rose late Sunday morning and decided to stay in Chicago and take advantage of the sites of the city. They went out to breakfast, hit the local Wal-mart and bought more things for Jake's place there. Each son wanted to contribute something to add their touch and taste and before long, they were laughing and having a grand time at the way the place ended up looking because Jake let them have a ball. He stacked the twin beds up and bought a third bed for Paul. They bought pots, pans, and funky colored fluorescent dishes, crazy decorations that each liked over the other, and he let them put them out, smiling in amusement as he stood in the kitchen putting away the few things he bought that would store long. Condiments, canned goods, dried goods, seasonings and juices and soft drinks, as well beer for himself, avoiding perishables. All this going on with their trips in and out, closely monitored by the lady upstairs Ms Earthaleen. It couldn't be missed, with her shifting the side of her curtains to peek out every time they drove up and parked.
Their first trip back to the apartment, after breakfast and going shopping for food, she came out the front door to make her presence known.
"Hey ya'll there! All ya'll ain't rentin' that place is you? I thought is was just you!" She addressed Jake. "Who all these here?" She went on to demand.
"Ms Earthaleen, these three young men are my sons. My oldest Benjamin, my second Kevin and my youngest, Paul. Boys, say hello to Ms Earthaleen."
"Good afternoon Ms. Earthaleen!" They all called at the same time, smiling at her as they carried things into the downstairs apartment.
"Em hm, afternoon! You got them boys, where they mama? You one of them divorcee's?" She asked Jake.
"No ma'am ... I've never been married."
"Figah's! I tell'yah now - them boys bet not be playin' no music all loud! All that rock'n'roll shit! I can tell that's what you listen to!"
"Yes ma'am Ms Earthaleen, I'll let'em know."
"You do that! I tell you somethin' else! You can park that truck, on Sat'day an' Sunday here on the boulevard - that's fine - but come tomorra' you gots to park on the side - else you gone get'ah ticket - I can tell'yah that now!"
"Yes ma'am Ms Earthaleen, I'll remember that." Jake grinned and made it quickly inside with his sons standing in the vestibule listening and laughing.
"Holy cow dad... how are you going to put up with that!?" They asked.
"I'm not worried about Ms Earthaleen, give me a bit of time, I'll have her eating out of my hands. I bet she's a good cook. I play my cards right, while here - meals will be a done deal... just gotta play my cards right. Matter of fact, before we leave and head back to Wisconsin, remind me to pick up a bouquet of flowers for her."
"No dad! A plant... women like that, like plants. That's what mom always says about older women. They love plants." Benjamin volunteered.
"True, so ... I'll bring her flowers, and each one of you, will buy her a different type of plant ... we'll soften her up." He smiled and winked. They carried on with their day together enjoying the time they shared. All the while, there were moments when Jake could do little else but think about Vivian. His sons all felt that they should have gone and gotten her to join them at the museum and when they went through Maxwell st. famously known at one time as Jew town. Now that it had been relocated from the old Maxwell st. to Canal and Roosevelt road, presently referred to as New Maxwell st. They found all kinds of goods reasonably priced with a bit of haggling, grinning because too many times they encountered goods that they knew were hot - but the atmosphere was great. The Mexican food was out of this world amazing; Paul couldn't get enough of it. Kevin bought a digital camera and starting taking pictures of everything there, it was his first time there as well Paul's. Benjamin had been there before with friends, so it wasn't as new to him. He derived great pleasure showing his little brother's around the place, especially taking pictures of the bl
ues bands and strategically placed singers or musicians. The crowds were thick, and the day was wonderful. As they browsed the area, Jake came across an antiques dealer. On display were many fine pieces of Victorian and French provincial furnishings, old, well cared for and standing proudly on display. Among them was a piece of sturdy furniture that had once been someone's vanity. The vanity was old Victorian made of bird's eye maple the man explained. Tall regal mirror, two top drawers that Jake opened to see would hold jewelery. Also, a hidden compartment within one of the larger drawers below, that would hold a lady's lingerie. The seller explained that if a person didn't know it was there, it could not be accidentally stumbled across. Jake hadn't a clue why he stood there letting the man show him all the authentic qualities and how well made it was, the weight of it, the sturdiness of it, going on about how you couldn't find furniture made like that any more and various other selling points that validated its worth. Unable to move, he found himself staring at the rich piece and scanning his memory of Vivian's room from that day he awoke to find her gone to work in his truck. In his search for her, he'd found her bedroom. There had been no vanity there. The furniture in it had been very old in its style - very similar to this vanity the man was trying so hard to sell him. The bench stool was covered in old brocade with a slightly faded floral pattern that added to the richness of it. His son's had been walking ahead and then stopped when they realized he wasn't with them.
They turned back to look at what had captured his attention.
Jake was stuck. His stomach gripped him in an inexplicable way. The vanity was holding him and wouldn't let him go, almost calling out his name. He'd told her he would give her a house warming gift - yet he hadn't. He realized then that again he was thinking about Vivian.
"Dad? What's up?" Paul asked as Benjamin and Kevin stared at the piece of furniture that was the height of complimenting a woman's place, room or boudoir.
Jake couldn't answer as he looked at the man and asked, "How much?"
"$2000.00 or best offer ... mind you, I can't let it go for less than $1500.00."
"Fuck - me!" Jake gasped and ran his hand over his face.
His sons all looked at him. "Who you looking at this for dad?" Benjamin asked.
Jake nodded to the man and turned walking away, his sons by him as he took eight steps, stopped. His heart was beating crazy in his chest, taking a deep breath he turned and looked back at it again. There was a couple looking at it, Jake had a panic attack. "Hey!" The man looked up. Jake walked back, his sons in tow. The couple smiled at each other admiring several pieces, the wife gushing over the vanity, but they couldn't afford it, he could tell, they sighed and walked off leaving it. At some point, Jake knew, a couple would appear that could afford it - he couldn't walk away and leave it. He saw Vivian sitting there. He needed to know, that even if he wasn't with her, that this needed to be hers. Impulsive as he was, he didn't give himself time to think things through, true to his nature - he said to the man. "Help me buy that from you. Tell me what forms of payment will you take for it?"
"Cash - Credit Card - sorry no checks."
"Will you take partial payment in cash, hold it and let me pay the other half?"
"Sorry... I have to sell it if the opportunity arrives, you know. That's why I'm out here, to sell it."
Jake turned away thinking.
"Dad... do you have half of that amount in cash to pay for it?" Kevin asked.
"Hell no I don't... but I have to get that vanity ... I have to."
"You want it that bad? I'll put it on my credit card." Benjamin volunteered.
Jake looked up stunned, "What?"
"You heard me ... let's put it on my credit card."
"Would you really do that for me?"
"Of course I would dad."
"If you did I'd pay it off quick." Jake assured him.
"I'm not worried about it dad. In fact, take it as a gift from me to you."
"Hey... I'll make partial payments on it too ... it can be a gift from me too!" Kevin added.
"I'm in!" Paul blurted. "An early father's day gift! How's that?" He said to his brothers. They all smiled with a nod of agreement.
Jake couldn't fight back the moisture in his eyes looking at his boys. Especially his oldest son, who had always been the most giving of his three sons. Always the first to remind the other two of mother's day, father's day, birthdays and his parents anniversaries.
An hour later, after very careful dis-assembling, they drove out of there with the vanity covered and securely strapped into the back of the truck.
"Now that we have it dad... who's it for?" Kevin asked.
Jake sighed, "If either of you laugh at me, or says one word - I'm puttin' your ass out to walk, partially paying for it or not."
Hearing that, they all started laughing because they knew by the warning who it was for. "You're in love with her dad! Admit it!" Paul ignored the warning and pointed this out to his father making the claim. "What are you talking about! What's love got to do with it? She's a nice person, I promised her a house warming gift. That's it."
"Dad! A house warming gift is a lamp... or or... a vase ... or a box of scented candles." Kevin pointed out.
"Hey... a house warming gift is whatever the giver decides." Jake corrected him.
"Sure dad... anything you say."
"Well that's the truth ... love! I don't fall in love with women, they fall for me."
They all smiled winking at each other. Benjamin leaned forward, "So we gonna take it to her now?"
"I don't know... truth is ... I don't want her to know it came from me."
"Dad - how else are we going to get it to her if we don't deliver it?" Kevin asked.
"Help me think of something - a reason for showing up with this. I told her - well - that I wouldn't be back. So I can't go back on my word and take it to her. Hell! I don't know what the fuck to do! Now I've got it, how the hell do I deliver it?!"
"Dad... just swallow your pride - and take it to her." Kevin advised.
"No! I can't." Jake bit.
"Dad! Then why'd you buy it?" Benjamin asked.
"Because I couldn't ... I just - I couldn't walk away and leave it. She - she loves stuff like that." Jake announced.
"You - are in love with her!" Benjamin sat back after that bold statement.
"Just because a body does something for someone don't mean its 'cause you're in love! Jesus! Love love love love love! Its not fuckin' love! She's a nice lil'girl - and -..."
"She don't look like no lil'girl to me." Benjamin commented. "She is aaall woman... and then some."
Jake's eyes shot up to his rear view mirror to look at his son, "Aye... mind yourself ... understand ... careful what you say."
All three could tell there was warning there. The look on their father's face was one they hadn't seen. They'd always known him to be at ease and laughing off most things, grinning with the best of them about whatever - but the face he was showing there, was a serious one.
"Aye ... chill dad ... I was just saying, she's beautiful - why are you fighting it?" Benjamin pushed.
"I'm not fighting anything. She's a nice person, and she likes stuff like that - and - that's just that. End of discussion. And uh, you guys will have to get me something else for father's day - because - I'm paying for that, its coming out of my pocket ... just so you know." He finished. They all grew quiet.
Jake glanced up in the rear view at it. He drove with care so as not to shake it loose from its cover and ties. The mirror lay on its side, covered with a heavy drape that was wrapped around it. "For now, I'm just going to take it back to my place." He finally stated.
They all nodded, saying nothing more. Back at the apartment, Jake and his sons brought it in carefully under the watchful eye of Ms Earthaleen. All spoke, grinning at her, taking to calling her "Eagle Eye Eartha!" Even Jake had to grin because she was most certainly that. Nothing got past her so it seemed un-noticed.
Jake searched around the apartment for
the perfect spot for it, and it ended up in his bedroom. They sat it up, re-attached the tall cheval mirror and carefully moved it back against the wall, placing the ornate legged bench up to it. All four men stood back to admire it.
"Wow... dad - I must admit, you have an eye for it. Whenever she gets it, its gonna blow her away." Kevin stated.
"It needs polishing up doesn't it? Paul run in the kitchen and get that furniture polish and a soft clothe."
Paul rushed to do what he was told, bringing back paper towels and Windex for the mirror. All three boys gave each other knowing glances as they watched their father carefully spray it down and polish it. He rubbed it slow with exquisite care. Thorough so that it was gleaming, and then spraying the paper towel so he could clean the mirror. He even did the legs of the bench. When he was done, he stood back with a sense of pride he couldn't understand. It was something about having a connection with a woman that had this kind of taste, knowing that gave him a heightened since of being. His mind instantly conjured a picture of Vivian sitting at it for the first time, the expression on her face. He imagined her turning to him while sitting on the little bench stool, a smile on her face lit up bright enough to blind his eyes.
Jake smiled. Before walking away from it, he pushed the bench stool up into the area beneath it and found a large white sheet that Kevin helped him drape over it, protecting it from drifting dust.
He carried on the rest of the day with his sons. Before locking up the apartment, they all returned as they'd planned to and surprised Ms Earthaleen with plants and flowers. When they arrived, of course she was looking. Stepping out the door, she asked.
BOMAW 4-6 Page 90
