Having children - now that she'd confessed this desire with her mother, albeit disagreeable to her, the need grew within her.
She wanted them, and she wanted them to be by him. If her children weren't McPherson's - she would have no children... period. "God, I must be crazy for wanting a man like that." She murmured, stepping from the shower, feeling shaky and unsure about her future - about a future with Jake.
She was in her bedroom trying to find something to wear. She couldn't focus on that. She needed to know about Jake, if he were okay.
She went to her phone and dialed Sylvia.
* * *
Wisconsin...
Shawn was in the basement working. Early hours of the morning was always his very best time to get things done. Up for a vigorous run, something to eat, and then into his office fresh with the morning, to get more work done. Sipping his coffee, he had many things on his mind. His brother for one. Benjamin second. The house. His wife, who was sleeping. She'd had a bit of an upset stomach through the night, and now slept after a few hours of restlessness. As always, before he rose, he'd check her, hug her, just a gentle squeeze and a soft, "I love you." Followed by a kiss to her temple. He waited for the soft smile that always came, along with a gently murmured, "Love you, too." Satisfied, he would roll away to leave her sleeping. He'd decided that he had the morning shift of taking Angela to school, Sylvia could pick her up in the afternoon; if Crystal or Mundo were home around that time, they could.
He turned back to his drafting board, working on a pencil art creation. One of the book covers he was designing was to be black and white. It had been a long time since he'd done pencil art, but liked the results, and knew it would work to illustrate the main characters. It was 6:10am - the phone rang.
He leapt to his feet, rushing for it before it rang twice. Jake, Sylvia, Shanna and Angela were still sleeping.
"Hello? McPherson residence."
"Ah - hi - is this Shawn?"
"Yeah? Who is this?"
"Vivian."
"Oh - hi sweetheart. This is an early one."
"I'm sorry about that-..."
"Hey - don't apologize... what's up? Sylvia is still sleeping."
"Oh. Man... well - you busy? I won't take up too much of your time - I know its early but-..."
"Vivian... no problem... I was up. What do you need, sweetheart?"
"It's Jake. Did he come home last night?"
"Jake? Yeah... in fact, I had to go get him."
"Oh, thank goodness! I was so worried about him. He was so drunk."
"Tell me about it. How did you know?" Shawn asked, stepping from his office and around the small corner, to peek at the subject of their discussion. He was stretched out on his stomach, sleeping like the dead. Shawn shook his head and backed back into his office, shutting the door.
"He... ah - called me last night."
"He called you? While he was drunk? Hmmm, that's very interesting." Shawn smiled. "So um, you don't mind me asking, what was he saying?"
Vivian smiled, giddy with excitement, for being able to talk to his older brother about him. "To be honest with you, he didn't make a whole lot of sense. He said um, that he thought, I was too good for him, and -..."
"Smart man, my brother."
"Shawn!"
Shawn chuckled, "Sorry... and what else?"
"...he uh...-(Vivian chuckled next)- ... he started singing to me." She giggled.
"Wait a minute. My brother, Jake, sang to you? As in - singing a song?" Shawn sat back, picked up his coffee, and took a sip.
"Yeah... a short verse, he was too drunk to finish. And, the call went dead, and I couldn't get a hold of him. I was so worried. I called him back about 3 or 4 times."
"Ah... good reason for that. You see, he must have called you from the men's room stall, where we found him - passed out, with his mobile phone in the toilet bowl."
"Oh, no... you're kidding me!" Vivian laughed.
"Yep... that's where it is."
"You left it in there?"
"Hell, yeah! I wasn't reaching my hand in there for it. Neither was Mundo! I suggested it, but uh, needless to say, Mundo wasn't going in for it either." Shawn laughed, remembering the look on Mundo's face. Shawn could hear a big sigh of relief from Vivian.
"Well, at least he's okay. That was my biggest worry. I guess I better let you go. Tell Sylvia I called, I may ring her later. I have to get ready for work, I'm running late as it is. To be honest, I'm not in the mood to go."
"Then, don't. You're in the wrong line of work, anyway. You shouldn't be working in a bank, you - young lady - should be a model. In fact, I'd like to do a photo shoot of you. A really nice layout. You ever had a portfolio done?"
Vivian was surprised, smiled, and answered, "No... never."
"Let me - please? You have amazing features and coloring-..."
"What's so amazing about being black?"
"There's black, and then there's black and beautiful, with class. That, would be you. Come on, let's book a date; let me shoot you - what'a'yah say? Then, we can discuss what it is I have in mind for you. You see, I envision you on fashion magazines, and being a spokesperson for various companies. I think that would be much more to your calling, than the one you're answering now."
"Emmm, well ... I guess so. How much will it cost me?"
"Time. Just your time. I asked you - remember? And, as I develop some ideas surrounding you - I may be able to fetch you up a contract, would you be interested?"
"Let me think about it, okay? I better get going. We'll set a date, maybe later? Is that all right?"
"Wait... I'm going to be inviting Sheila and Dennis up for this Memorial Day weekend, come with them?"
"Huh?"
"You heard me ... this weekend, come here. You - with Sheila and Dennis! I insist!"
"Oh, Shawn ... what - what about Jake?"
"What about Jake?" He asked, as if he were insignificant.
"I don't know, Shawn. That's going to be a bit uncomfortable."
"For who?"
"Him... me."
"Why?"
"Shawn! You know why!"
"Look - you're Sylvia's friend! There's going to be plenty of people here. I'm inviting her mom and dad as well, plus my parents are coming. I want you here. Jake don't like it, he can find someplace else to be."
"You guys need to stop shoving me down his throat! That's what he's going to think." Vivian moaned.
"Oh ... I see. So, you're supposed to miss out on gathering with friends and family, having a good time, because he's too much of schmuck to give up the fight?! You know, the few words he said was true, you're too damn good for 'em. Screw 'em - who gives a shit what he thinks?! Sylvia will want you here! I want you here! Sheila and Dennis will - my parents, as well! I'm not taking no for an answer."
"Shawn!"
"I don't wanna hear it! You're made of tougher stuff than what I'm hearing... don't make me drive all that way to get you!"
"Okay, okay, okay! I'll come."
Shawn grinned. "That's a girl! I'll tell Sylvia you called."
Shawn heard the click, and turned his off as well. He went back to the drawing board, literally. Sitting there for 20 more minutes, making quick short sketches with the side of his pencil, and unable to stop the thought of Benjamin. Jake's words at the restaurant as well, rang in the background. Was his wife right after all? That was the question. It irked him that Jake tossed that before him. He wasn't stupid, he knew his little brother, knew him well. He'd done this on purpose, to get back at him for something. He knew that he'd deliberately dangled Benjamin before him, emphasizing one clear point; whether Jake was his biological father or not, Benjamin was his - his name was on the birth certificate. Shawn paused in his sketching. He didn't know what to do. He'd made such a show of denial with Sylvia, he didn't want to stir up more investigating this. Especially, considering the fact that Benjamin may not be his. Maybe Jake was just playing a little game, and bluffing him. Giving it more though
t, he didn't think it was a bluff. After all, what had made Jake feel the need to get trashed last night? Almost, like he was drinking away a guilty conscience. As he sat drawing, he glanced up at a picture of his wife, borrowing some of her features for the female character that would be on the cover of the book. Posted around him, were several pictures of Sylvia he'd taken. Including the sketching of her he'd done while sleeping in his bed the night he discovered she carried his child. While he would borrow her features, the rest of the female character would consist of other elemental looks. For this, women's magazines as well as men's, lay strewn across a bench in front of his drafting board. All he need do, is pick one up and flip through it for image inspiration. Never using one entire look, he'd always mixed and matched for an overall look. Even when using a model, he would alter them a touch, creating an entirely new look for the character.
Shawn stretched, looked at the clock...6:40am. He stood from the table, walked out of the office and to the refrigerator. He would fix breakfast and get Angela going; he didn't want Sylvia to have to get up. Being in the early stages of pregnancy, he preferred she do as less as possible, which meant he didn't mind being the one to start breakfast from time to time. With Shanna there, he knew to make a bit extra. He smiled, to have two of his siblings there at his home with him was a great feeling. He would make a light breakfast consisting of prepared chopped fruits, cottage cheese, sliced Colby cheese, lightly toasted whole-grain bread with a touch of butter and honey, and slices of lean bacon, baked brown, crispy and perfect. Breakfast was ready.
Shawn could hear activity upstairs, the sounds were coming from his bedroom; it seemed that the wife was up. The floors left no privacy in that house. One could hear right through them, so he could hear when she climbed out of bed, entered the bathroom - where she was now, the toilet flushed and he noted the shower was coming on.
Yep... she was up to stay. It wasn't a moment later that sounds from his daughter's room also alerted him, it had to be Shanna getting up as well.
Shawn prepared himself another cup of coffee, sipping on it. He decided to let Sylvia wake Angela, they had a morning ritual going; one that gladdened his heart, soothed his soul to witness. Sipping his coffee, he cleaned up peels, cores and stems from the fruit he'd cut up, and wiped up the counter top, laying everything on the table, including plates. Doing so, he glanced over at his sleeping brother. This arrangement of him sleeping downstairs on the sofa, was not going to wash for much longer. With the table set for Angela, Shanna, and Sylvia to eat, he stood looking down at him. As he stared, he noted the build of his brother, and thought about Benjamin. He thought about his own build, and thought about Benjamin. Comparing each other. Problem was, outside of being taller than him, Jake's basic physique was similar to his own, with less bulk because he didn't work out. In truth, his brother didn't really need to, he had long, defined, whipcord-lean muscles. All natural from manual labor. Even being long and lean, there was plenty to him. Shawn hadn't missed that when they fought at the wedding. He was strong as hell, and packed one hell of a punch. Nope... no more little - little brother. From now on a more appropriate description would be younger... but certainly not little. Continuing to gaze at him, their coloring was different of course, but already Jake was showing signs of heading towards a tan. He remembered growing up, and while he and Derrick always had to burn a bit first before they would tan, Jake had always gone straight into bronzing. All would think Shawn would be the one to tan so quickly with his dark hair, but it wasn't so. Jake always naturally tanned - the longer he stayed out, the darker he could get. Again, thinking of that, Benjamin could be Jake's. Benjamin had a skin tone to him that was not quite fair white, he appeared to have a bit of olive in his complexion, similar to a light Italian. Which meant, he too would tan well. So now, did that mean he'd inherited that through his DNA? Or was he the product of Jake?
DNA...genetics was a crazy thing. Shawn wanted to kill the thoughts, but couldn't. They kept swirling about in his head. Truth of the matter was simple; he or Jake could be Benjamin's father. With coloring similar to his, it was also similar to Jake's - absent the blonde hair. Shawn stood noticing the scarring on his brother's upper back was slowly fading. Right now, he was white - by July, Jake would be bronze. Shawn shook his head, because THAT was something he'd always been jealous about. That Jake could tan in a blink. Go from winter white, to summer toast in an instant. In fact, he'd seen Jake tan in just a day out in the sun.
Sylvia was walking around upstairs, he heard low mumbles of female voices; the women were planning their day. He heard Sylvia as she was getting Angela up. Shawn walked away from where Jake lay and went into his office. His wife would be down shortly, he put Benjamin to the back of his mind... for the time being. He wished he had a few more hours to work, but there was no sense in focusing on work, now with the women up. Once the activities of the household was going full tilt, he wouldn't get anything more done in his office until nightfall. That was going to have to stop at some point. He was starting to slip behind. He received three emails already from Lowell James, three more authors were taken on. That meant, he still had to complete the work for their novels, two others that had been added, and now... three more. It was getting to the point where he was going to have to schedule his work, and not touch anything else until things were on target for the book covers. He also had to work up the layout presentation for each novel, create the posters and the cardboard book shelves that would be set up in each book store for the new author releases. After Memorial Day weekend, he was going to have to buckle down. By the looks of things, he knew that meant leaving the building of their new home to the guys that he was hiring through Jake. There was no way he would keep up with work and build a home too. Granted, his presence would always be, since he would be right across the road working, so he would be able to check on it at anytime. However, it also meant, he might as well pay them for full contract on building the home. Having reached that conclusion, there was no way he was going to tell Sylvia that, it would just be done. Besides, she'd already agreed with him on building a new home anyway; whether he was there to lesson the costs or not, it was going to get done.
"Good morning." A quiet voice broke into his thoughts, as he stood staring down at the sketch he was doing. He looked towards the door to see Shanna standing there smiling at him.
"Mornin', flower." Shawn returned, reverting to the nickname he'd given her long ago. Shanna stepped into this office over to where he stood looking down at the sketch drawing, saying right off, "Sylvia's getting Angela up and ready for school. Wow, nice. Sylvia?" She asked of the eyes, nose, mouth and cheeks. Only the center face shown on the white rice paper. "Just her features. I'm going to be doing just a vague outline of a couple here, because the book is going to be all white with the contrast of the title in black and the sketching I'm doing of the couple in the novel."
"I see. I don't know how you do it, Shawn, but I remember sitting quietly next to you coloring in my coloring books while you drew like that."
"I'm much better now than I was back then, drawing pictures of you, so many pictures of my flower." He smiled tapping her nose. "Mom still have them?" He asked.
"Yes, on the wall in her sewing room." Shanna answered with a smile.
"Seems the skill has transferred through to the next generation." Shawn opened, he just couldn't stop himself.
"What do you mean?" Shanna asked.
"Benjamin ... he and I finally had a chance to talk to each other over the weekend. I was surprised to find that he's an artist as well, imagine that?" He asked her, watching her reaction from his peripheral. She glanced up at him, answering carefully. "Oh... yeah, he does draw well. Must run in the family." She returned.
"I still can't believe it sometimes, to think that Jake fathered them when he was so young." Shawn shook his head, "He sure got the jump on me, considering my old girlfriend is their mother." Shawn chuckled, "She's married now, right?"
Shanna stared a moment blushing r
ed, not sure how to take his comments. 'Was he fishing?' She wondered, but then figured, what reason did he have for fishing? She realized she was pausing too long. "Yeah! She's married." She returned. Shawn turned away picking up a magazine to flip through for an imagine he'd marked to use, giving the impression of idle, casual interest. "Has been for years." She added, watching him fold back the magazine to cut out a page and clamp it to his drafting board.
"To a good guy? Who didn't mind her boys by Jake?"
"Quincy is nice - he's Jack Jacob's brother. Remember Jack Jacobs? You beat him up once."
Shawn cut a glance at his little sister, his eyes rolling up and to the right thinking with a shameful grin on his face. "A Jack Jacobs, hm? So I take it, his brother is Quincy Jacobs?"
"Yep."
"So, why'd I beat him up?" He asked, wondering.
"Because you heard that he stole Derrick's bike after school. You walked to where he lived, beat him up, and rode the bike home, remember? His parents called the house, telling what you did. They were so angry!" Shanna laughed. "Sure enough, there you came, riding up into the yard on that bike!" Shanna went on to laugh, "Problem was, it wasn't Derrick's, it was Jack's bike. The boys that stole Derrick's had gotten caught with three other's they'd stolen by the police."
Shawn stood grinning, blushing over the whole incident. "Momma made me ride all the way back with that bike and apologize for beating him up. BY myself I might add!"
"But we were down the block to pick you up. Momma felt bad, she didn't want you to have to walk all the way back home." Shanna reminded him.
Shawn smiled, so she had."I kind'ah made it okay, after all - if I remember his little brother correctly, I kept him from being beat up, a few times." Shawn mentioned.
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