“Who else was invited?” she questions as she looks at the few couples dispersed around the room.
“Well, this is pretty much everyone who could make it…” I trail off, feeling a little self-conscious. “Travis is coming, but I think he’s going to be a little late.”
Of course, this party is too small for her liking. She’s the queen of inviting everyone she’s ever met to her parties just so she can feel important. I never really felt self-conscious about my number of friends until right now. She’s always had a knack for making people feel inferior. I find that she’s unimpressed with the whole thing.
“Well, it’s very cute, Trevor,” she says with a hint of disdain in her tone.
Grey starts fussing from his position in my arms. He’s wanting down so he can crawl around and play with his stuffed animals. I place him on the floor at my feet, but instead of wobbling away, he hugs my legs and stays put. Fucking goofball. I smile at him before turning my attention back to his grandmother.
“Thanks. Ronnie put a lot of work into it.”
“I can see that. Well, let me give Grey one last kiss and I better get going,” she says, not bothering to hide her boredom.
“You want to leave already? You just got here,” I try to reason with her. “Besides, the food hasn’t gotten here yet.”
“What are we having?” she asks. Although, I don’t know why. It’s obvious she’s completely uninterested in this whole affair.
“Pizza,” I answer simply. “Then we’re having Grey’s birthday cake and ice cream.”
“You know I can’t eat that stuff, Trevor,” she answers in that tsk-tsk type of tone. “I’m on a diet. I’m sure my personal trainer would have a field day if he knew what you were planning to feed me.”
I sigh, defeated. If she wants to go, fine. I guess I’m just happy she gave Grey a few moments of her time in the first place. But he’s her only grandchild for fuck’s sake! Why wouldn’t she want to be involved in his life? Whatever. Good. Fucking. Riddance. If she doesn’t want to be here, fucking fine. I obviously can’t fucking stop her.
“You don’t want to stick around to see Travis?” Hell, she always loved him more than me. I’m surprised she doesn’t want to wait around so she can say “hello.”
“I might drop in after I run my errands,” she says as if that were a compromise.
Can’t her fucking errands wait?
“That’s fine,” I say, no longer giving a shit.
She kneels down to say goodbye to the birthday boy, quickly giving him a hug and a kiss before she stands and turns to leave. “I love you, Greyson,” she says to him before giving him one last wave and leaving my apartment. I pick him back up and return to Ronnie’s side. She’s talking to Eden and Josie. I see they’ve moved their conversation to the dessert table, where they would be in clear view of my entire conversation with Evelyn. Jesus, can Ronnie be any more transparent?
I attempt to pass Grey off to her so I can grab a drink for myself, but she quickly stops me. “I think the pizzas are here,” she says before walking past me toward the front door.
“Pizza?” I ask, confused. No one knocked on the door that I heard.
“Yeah,” she says, looking suddenly flustered. “I have to run downstairs to get them. They mixed up the apartment numbers.”
Fuck, she’s a terrible liar. I nod, pretending like I believe her and let her leave with every intention of following her. I quickly turn to Eden and ask if she could hold onto Grey for a bit. She doesn’t miss a beat and quickly takes him from my arms. I walk slowly across the room so no one’s alarmed, jog down the hallway, and run down the steps until I’m outside our apartment building. I find her in the parking lot with Evelyn. I stop in my tracks behind a van so they don’t notice me. Ronnie is right up in her face. My beautiful girl’s face is flushed with anger as she speaks. I stand back in shock. Once I feel neither of them have realized I’ve joined them outside, I take a few steps forward so I can hear them more clearly.
“I don’t understand, Evelyn! Just help me fucking understand!” Ronnie shouts in her face. “That’s your grandson in there and you can’t seem to give him the time of day. And Trevor… God, do you know how your actions have affected him? I know you’re not his mother… but you raised him! How could you not love him at all?”
“I don’t have to stand here and listen to this,” Evelyn tells her as she attempts to walk away.
“You don’t have to listen to anything, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t need to hear it! Greyson loves you—you’re his grandma for God’s sake—yet you don’t even pay any attention to him. And Trevor… Trevor loves you even if he can’t admit that to himself. How could you possibly be so blind to this, Evelyn? I’ve only seen you and Trevor together twice and I can see that much!” Ronnie’s near tears at this point, still standing in front of the woman I called “mom” for so many years so she can’t walk away. “Evelyn, how could you not love him? He was just a little boy. He was innocent in all that shit.”
Tears fill my own eyes as I listen to her. I can’t believe she’s standing up for me in this way. She’s saying all the stuff I’d never say myself. She’s saying all the shit I didn’t even want to admit to myself. Ronnie sees me for what I am and understands me better than anyone. In this moment, I feel like I’m falling in love with her all over again. Fuck, I love her more than anyone has ever loved another person, and it’s obvious now that she feels the same way.
“He needed you! Grey needs you! Why are you acting like this? How can you act like this? Don’t you care about anyone? Or do you really only care about yourself?”
“I’ll stop you right there,” Evelyn coldly cuts her off. “You just met me. How dare you act like you know me enough to judge me?”
“I may have just met you, but Trevor has told me enough.”
“Did he?” She snorts. “Did he tell you about his father? Do you understand what it’s like to raise a child that’s not your own?”
“I’m sorry about that, but like I said, Trevor was an innocent child! Why make him pay for his father’s sins? He didn’t do anything to hurt anyone,” Ronnie says, her voice still trembling with anger.
“It doesn’t matter,” she waves her off. “He was a constant reminder of my husband’s infidelity. Although, even if he were mine, I’d feel the same way about him. He’s been a fuck-up his entire life. Ever since he was a little kid, he caused nothing but trouble. He never held a candle to my son—”
Ronnie’s hand shoots out and slaps Evelyn across the cheek, shutting her up. As soon as her hand makes contact, I hear her gasp and she quickly steps back, covering her face with her hands. She’s too shocked to speak. When she finally regains her composure she spits out, “How could he get any better with a mother who didn’t believe in him? A woman who would speak of his faults every time he even tried to succeed. How dare you treat a child like that!”
“How dare I?” Evelyn mocks. “Strong words coming from a young girl who doesn’t have a child of her own. You can play mommy all day long with my grandson, but that doesn’t make you a real mother.” She stops for a moment to look Ronnie up and down before saying, “Dean really did do a disservice to his son when he named Trevor as his guardian.”
Ronnie brings her hand up again, and for a moment I think she’s going to smack her once. Her hand shakes in the air before she clenches it into a fist and brings it down to her side. I can see her entire body is shaking as she takes another step toward Evelyn. “Trevor is a better parent than you could ever be. I might not know you well, but of that, I’m certain. He isn’t a fuck-up. He’s a beautiful man who’s had a tough upbringing. A man who’s dealt with so much and has overcome every obstacle he’s faced. You see someone who’s flawed, and I do, too. Except, I find his flaws beautiful because I love every part of him. He’s the best father Grey could ever have. I wish I could’ve met Dean because it would’ve been nice to have known someone who loved Trevor unconditionally like I do. Evelyn, did
you ever stop to think that maybe Dean knew it would be a mistake to leave Grey with you?! No—he knew Trevor was going to be the parent Grey needed. He knew that his brother would’ve made the best possible father for his son. Anyway, you may not love them, but I love them enough for both of us.”
My heart feels so full at this moment. My face aches as I feel my eyes fill with tears. I knew Ronnie loved me, but I could’ve never hoped she would love me like this. Everything she said was so beautiful… so perfect. I want to spend the rest of my life showing her just how special she is to me.
Evelyn’s silent. What could she possibly say to that? She sneers at my fiancée before walking toward her car. My emotions are a fucking roller coaster where that woman is concerned. One moment I pity her, one moment I hate her, and then I’m back to feeling only fucking pity for her again. Now that she’s gone, I don’t know what to do. Should I sprint upstairs and pretend I didn’t just witness all that? That feels so wrong because all I want to do is take Ronnie in my arms and express how much I fucking love her.
As soon as she turns back toward our apartment building, she sees me. Her eyes are filled with tears and her cheeks are flushed as she begins to walk toward me. She’s walking so slowly, so I have to jog to her because I’m so fucking impatient. I pull her into my arms and kiss her. Pouring every ounce of love and passion my body can muster into our kiss. Her lips taste salty from her tears, yet, they still feel so soft—like velvet against mine. I never want this kiss to end, so, it takes me awhile before I have the strength to pull away.
Once I do, Ronnie blushes and asks, “You heard all of that?”
“Well, not all of it.” I can’t help but smile. “I just heard all of the important parts.”
She laughs before closing her eyes, resting her head against my chest. “I was just so angry,” she mumbles. “I saw the way you were looking at her… and I saw the hurt in your eyes. I couldn’t let her do that to you and Grey without saying something to her about it.”
“I can’t believe you stood up to her like that,” I say, still completely fucking awed and mystified. “That was so hot, baby.”
“Hot?” She snorts. “I don’t know about that.”
“Everything you do is incredibly hot,” I tease her before growing more serious. “Ronnie, I love you so fucking much. You are my life.”
She looks up at me, her eyes filling with tears. However, this time I can tell they’re tears of happiness. “I love you, too, Trevor. Forever.”
“Forever,” I agree before bringing my lips to hers once more.
We come back to the apartment with pizzas in hand. Grey’s on the floor, showing his party guests his stuffed animals, while Harper plays with him. The room feels so much happier now that Evelyn is gone. Or maybe it’s just me because I’m so fucking happy right now I can barely describe it. I’m at my son’s birthday party with family and friends. It still feels so fucking unreal I know that it’ll take a while before I can stop pinching myself.
Travis arrives halfway through lunch with a small present in hand. He looks happy, yet, reserved. He holds Grey for a little bit before returning him to me.
“He looks more and more like Dean every day,” he comments with a wistful smile.
“Yes, he does,” I agree, but I don’t feel sad about saying this anymore. I’m happy he looks like Dean. Having Grey means I’ll always have a piece of my brother in my life.
When it’s time for cake and ice cream, Grey starts freaking the fuck out. As soon as he sees the cake he starts screaming. I’ve never seen him look so fucking excited about anything before. It’s like he’s having a sugar high already, although, he hasn’t even dug into the cake yet. I sit at the small dining room table with him on my lap as Ronnie places the honeycomb inspired cake in front of us. Everyone gathers around the table to sing to him.
“Can you take a few pictures, Mom?” I ask as I hand her my phone with the camera app opened.
“Of course,” she replies with tears in her eyes.
Mom situates herself at the opposite end of the table and begins taking pictures as Ronnie lights the candles. I’m sure I have a ridiculous grin on my face, but I’ve never felt this fucking happy.
“Is everyone ready?” Eden asks, clapping her hands in excitement.
Grey squeals and reaches for his cake. “Not yet, buddy.” I laugh as I stop his wild, little hands. “We’ve got to sing first.”
As everyone sings “Happy Birthday,” I rock him in my lap, watching his smiling face as he looks up at me. His eyes are filled with pure excitement as he soaks in the positive energy in the room. My eyes fill with tears as I look at him. Fuck, I’m so sappy today, but I can’t fucking help it. I can’t believe how proud I am. I did it! He’s one, and he’s healthy and happy. Dean would be so fucking proud of me! I clench my jaw and try to keep my tears at bay.
They finish singing and I tickle his stomach before helping him blow out the candles. He claps his hands and giggles as he watches the smoke fly everywhere.
“Dada!” he squeals, pointing to the cake.
“You’re one year old, buddy! Happy birthday, Grey! Daddy loves you so much.” I clench my jaw harder, trying desperately to keep myself from fucking crying in front of all of these people.
I did it; I’m a good fucking dad. I never thought I’d be good at it, but I am. I did something right. Grey loves me like my brother knew he would. I feel my dad rest his hand on my shoulder, holding it there until I finally look up at him.
“You’re doing a great job, Trevor. You should feel proud of yourself.”
I give him a small smile, although my jaw fucking aches as I grit my teeth to restrain my tears.
I am proud of myself, and I know Dean would be proud, too.
chapter 45
good riddance
“Well, babe, what do you think?” Ronnie asks as she steps back and wipes her forehead, smearing the blue paint that had dripped onto her face moments before.
What do I think? It’s fucking incredible. Every fucking inch of it. I guess it’s fitting that my girl did this because she’s incredible, too. It’s almost as beautiful as she is. It’s so hard for me to look away from her long enough to take in Grey’s newly painted bedroom. His newly painted bedroom in our brand new fucking house. I’ve never felt more proud. I’m a father, I’m a homeowner, and soon, I’ll be a husband, too. Freshly twenty-five years old as of last week, I can’t believe how different the horizon for this year looks. I’m so fucking lucky. Never have I felt so complete.
I look to Ronnie, who looks beyond stunning in her tank top and overalls, which are splattered in paint. I’ve spent the entire day trying to tear my eyes away from her braless tits. With the windows open for ventilation, her nipples are constantly straining against the thin fabric of her shirt, making it nearly impossible for me to focus on painting. Luckily, the room looks perfect despite the delicious distractions.
I never knew my girl was so artistic. The four, freshly painted, walls exceed all of my expectations. Grey is going to freak-out when he sees this. Ever since seeing The Lion King, he’s been obsessed with anything jungle related. Today, Ronnie has gone completely over the top. She painted trees, vines, and jungle grass along with an elephant, lion, zebra, giraffe, and multiple monkeys poking out of the various trees. I helped her paint the light blue background and a few butterflies here and there. It looks fucking incredible. We’ve been wanting to do this since we moved in a week ago. I’m happy we finally got the chance. My son deserves the fucking best and I think this will go beyond any of his wildest imaginations.
“This is fucking amazing, baby. I can’t believe we actually finished it.”
She smiles as she assesses her work. “It really turned out nicely. It’s not exactly like the picture… but I love it, regardless.”
“Fuck that DIY site,” I say with a grin as I pull her body against mine. “I love yours better than anyone’s we’ve seen online.”
“Thanks, Trev,” she says
as she turns around in my arms to face me.
I squeeze her body against mine and bring my lips down to meet hers. She tastes so sweet and feels so perfect. I could take her right here. She moans against me before pulling away to breath. When she looks up at my face, she giggles, making me smile. I always enjoy hearing that beautiful sound.
“What are you giggling about?”
“You,” she responds with a coy grin. “Your face is covered in paint now.” She grabs a small towel from her pocket and rubs the paint off my face before cleaning up her own. “What do you think Grey will think?” she finally asks.
“What will he think? Are you kidding? Ronnie, he’s going to love it.” I bend down to try to kiss her again, but she stops me.
“Do you want to go get him and find out?”
I can’t help but fucking pout at this. She’s been teasing my cock all day and now I’ll have to wait until tonight to get some relief. “You want to pick him up now? We told your sister nine o’clock and it’s only five after eight.”
Eden’s home is only a short walk away, so what’s the rush? Ronnie says I’m insatiable, but I think it’s just her. It’s not my fault that she does this to me. Just being in the same room with her makes me fucking hard. My desire for her can be downright inconvenient at times. It’s hard to have sex with a baby always around. It’s like we have to sneak it in whenever we find the time. Whether it’s in the shower or on the kitchen floor, whenever the urge hits—which is constantly—we’re fucking. So, she must really want to show our son his room if she’s willing to pass up the perfect opportunity to have sex without the possibility of interruptions.
“Come on, Trev. I’ll make it up to you tonight. I promise. I just can’t wait to show him.”
Can I deny her anything? We change our clothes before walking down the street to pick up Grey. He’s more than ready to come home by the time we get there. While he loves hanging out with Harper, he grows antsy after a few hours without seeing Ronnie or me. We find him super fussy in Quinton’s arms, but he thankfully stops crying as soon as he sees us.
The Blessing Page 59
