Home to the Harbor--A Novel

by Lee Tobin McClain

  With a start, he realized that she had said some version of that, sometime in the weeks before she died. And he had lightened up the restrictions on that a little bit, not wanting to hover over her and be a helicopter parent.

  “I know I couldn’t be with you every minute, but I wish I had been with you then.” His throat went thick and the tears came then, a lot of them. He hated so much that she’d died alone.

  After a long time, William said a prayer of his own, wiped his eyes and blew his nose, and stood. “I’ll be back,” he said. “I’ll tell you how the scholarship goes, who gets it.”

  She didn’t answer, of course. But he felt a little more at peace as he turned away and walked back to his car.

  Could he move on now? He didn’t know. But the lighter feeling in his heart told him he wanted to try.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  WILLIAM STRAIGHTENED HIS collar and loosened his tie. It had been a long time since he’d worn a dress suit, but Easter seemed to be the right occasion.

  Oh and then there was the small matter of proposing to Bisky, which he’d decided to do right after church. As in, now.

  He had tried to listen to the sermon, and he’d sung along with the hymns, but his mind was preoccupied. He just wanted to do it already. He tried to make his way through the after-church crowd, but everyone seemed to want to talk.

  Mrs. Decker, wearing a wide, flower-covered hat, plucked his sleeve and stopped him. “You clean up well,” she said approvingly.

  That was one vote of confidence, but he definitely didn’t feel secure. Bisky wasn’t answering his calls, so Sunny had suggested that church would be the right spot to get together with her.

  He couldn’t believe it, but Sunny and several of the other teenagers were involved in making this proposal work, or at least they knew about it.

  “Hurry up, William!” Sunny gestured to him, and he tried harder to get through the crowd. It wasn’t easy at his size, but the advantage was, he could see over the other people.

  He saw Bisky and immediately, all his courage left him.

  She wore a beautiful blue dress that hugged her curves, and she, too, had a hat on. Despite her height, today she was wearing heels. She wasn’t taller than William, but she was taller than most of the people in the church.

  Including Evan Stone, with whom she was having an intent conversation. Jealousy shot through William’s body and his courage came back. He made his way to where the two of them were standing.

  According to Sunny’s plan, he was supposed to get Bisky to come to the front of the church, but it wasn’t going to happen. Right now, he just had to get her away from Evan.

  “Can I talk to you?” he blurted as soon as there was a break in their conversation. He was being awkward, maybe rude, but he didn’t even care.

  Bisky tilted her head to one side and narrowed her eyes. “Why now, William?”

  “It’s important.” He didn’t answer the question, because how could he?

  “Give us a minute,” she said, her voice cool.

  Sunny was texting him, making his phone buzz repeatedly. While Bisky and Evan continued their conversation, he read the messages, which boiled down to “hurry up!” and “Tell her to come to the front of the church!”

  Sunny had assured him that the little church’s altar would be the best backdrop for him to pop the question. He was pretty sure that she had organized some of the teenagers to watch, and he knew that she planned to photograph the event.

  But that wasn’t what William wanted, he realized now that he was in the moment. He wanted privacy and he wanted to be outdoors. He’d ask to walk her home, he decided just as Sunny approached, and he told her so.

  “That’s not social media worthy!” Sunny whispered the words so only William could hear, tugging at his sleeve. “Just get her inside!”

  He turned around and put his hands on Sunny’s shoulders, gently. “I appreciate your help, and I’m glad you’re on board with my asking her. But I need to do it my way, not yours.”

  Her mouth was open to protest, but she snapped it shut and nodded. “Okay,” she said. “Sometimes I get a little overenthusiastic.”

  He grinned. “I like that about you.” He did, too. He liked everything about Sunny, and he hoped he’d get the chance to know her better, to join her family. He patted her shoulder once more and then turned back to Bisky.

  She was saying goodbye to Evan, and it seemed like they were making plans to get together. William hated that, but it wasn’t his place to tell her who she could get together with. His place was just to try to encourage her to get together with him.

  “Can I walk you home?” he asked. “I need to talk to you.”

  She hesitated.

  The clouds were thinning out and the day was warm. He looked down at her shoes. “Can you walk okay in those?”

  “Not fast, but sure.” She was studying his face and the frown on hers said she wasn’t buying any excuses for his bad behavior.

  Well, she was worth fighting for. He held out his hand, and after a short hesitation, she took it. And he drew her away from the crowd and toward the street that led to the docks and home.

  * * *

  WHAT DID WILLIAM want with her?

  He looked so serious. And so incredibly handsome. She’d never seen him in a suit, wouldn’t have thought he could wear one well, as big as he was, but it fitted him perfectly and he looked self-assured and comfortable and really, really good.

  Her mouth went so dry that she dug around for an excuse to slow him down, to go inside and pull herself together. “I left my coat in there,” she said, gesturing toward the church. “I’ll get it.”

  “I’ll come with you,” he said.

  So much for pulling herself together. She hurried inside, leaving him to follow behind her. She took her time walking to the coatrack.

  He stopped in the entryway, and spoke to a small group of the teenagers. Sunny was among them, and they seemed to be having a somewhat heated debate, but everyone was smiling.

  She had to admire how he had embraced the work with the teenagers. They really liked him. Despite having every reason to back off from them, considering the trauma in his past, the loss of his daughter, he’d powered through and stepped up.

  Sometimes courage wasn’t rushing into a battlefield or carrying somebody’s pet cat out of a burning building. Sometimes, courage was staying where you were and doing what you had to do, no matter how much it hurt.

  William had that kind of courage.

  As she walked back to the group, William was shaking his head and waving the teenagers away. “Get out of here, I’ll do it my way.”

  Do what?

  As the kids left, looking at her and laughing a little bit, William beckoned her over to a picture on the wall of the church. It was among many others that depicted the history and life of the church and its congregation.

  “Can you find us?” he asked.

  She looked at the pictures. She had walked past them for years without studying them closely, but now, she saw that one of them was from a long-ago church picnic they’d both attended. They were young, maybe eleven and twelve, and they were playing beach volleyball with other kids. Bisky had worn her serviceable tank suit, and William, who probably didn’t even own a swimsuit at that time, was wearing shorts and no shirt.

  They were high-fiving each other, laughing.

  “We had it made as volleyball players,” Bisky said. “That must be one of the rare times we were on the same team. Usually, they didn’t allow that.”

  “Everybody wanted one of the tall kids,” he said. He bit his lip. “Actually, that’s probably one of the few times I spent an afternoon just goofing around.”

  She nodded. His family hadn’t had the space for that type of fun, physically or emotionally. “Did you end up talking to your dad?”


  “I did.” He took her hand again and turned toward the exit. “I visited him in prison, had a surprisingly good talk. Want to walk?”

  An icy hand clutched Bisky’s heart.

  He must be getting ready to break it to her that he was leaving.

  She tried to count back in her head. How long had it been since he’d come? How long did the Victory Cottage program last?

  If he wasn’t leaving now, he would be soon. And even though she was mad at him, the thought of him not being here sucked all the air out of her chest.

  She had to admit it: she’d fallen for him. He was so good with Sunny, with the teenagers, with everyone in town. He was her old friend.

  And he was much more than that, in her heart, but she didn’t want to dwell on that, even inside her own head. He had said he wasn’t interested, and she had her pride.

  Numbly, she followed him down the street, winding through the little residential neighborhoods, picturesque with spring flowers and warm sunshine and white picket fences. In one of the yards, a group of kids shouted, running around with baskets in their hands, clearly on an egg hunt.

  Now that they were walking, now that her hand was warm in his, he didn’t seem to be in any hurry to say anything. But she wanted to get this over with. “Just tell me,” she said.

  He looked sideways at her. “Do you mean that?”

  “Yes!” She turned to him then, pulling her hand out of his, putting both hands on her hips. “I’m not going to stroll through town all day waiting for you to drop some kind of bombshell.”

  He was looking at her in such an intent, intense way. She didn’t know what it meant, but it took her breath away. His eyes took her breath away.

  Something about the way he looked at her... Yes. She’d fallen for him. She’d fallen in love with him, and he was leaving.

  All of a sudden it came to her with breathtaking clarity, the thing she’d been wanting, but had never articulated to herself before: to grow old with him. They’d been kids together, and in some part of herself, she had wanted that to go on, to be with him across the lifespan, to watch his hair grow gray and see what other changes age might bring to both of them.

  She wanted to weather those changes together. But it wasn’t going to happen, and her throat tightened at the thought of losing him.

  “All right.” He led her to a bench that looked out over the bay. He waited until she’d sat down, and then sat down himself, next to her.

  She looked at his dear face, tears prickling at her eyes.

  He touched her face, wiped a tear with his thumb, and then she realized she was already crying.

  “Why are you sad?” he asked. “It’s a happy time.”

  “Not when you don’t want me.”

  He looked puzzled. “Why would you think that?”

  Tears were running down her face now. “What you said at the dogfight,” she managed.

  “I didn’t mean any of that.” He shook his head, gripping her hand. “I wanted to protect you. To protect you and Sunny, and they were getting more violent when they thought we were connected. That’s all. I never meant to hurt you.” He took her hand and brought it to his mouth for a light kiss. “I am sorry I left you alone to deal with that situation. Really sorry. Going to try and help my ex was bad judgment, and it won’t happen again.”

  She studied him. “Why’d you do it, then?”

  He shook his head. “I know how competent you are, and how incompetent she is. I thought you could handle everything yourself, but even if you could, you shouldn’t have to.”

  Did he mean it? “I thought she was your priority. It sure seemed that way.”

  “Nope. You are. I’m going to try to ensure that you never doubt that again. Because the thing is, Bisky, I love you.”

  “You what?” She sucked in a breath, and heat seemed to spread within her. Her heart raced and she couldn’t say anything more. She could only watch his face.

  She must have imagined hearing that. Pure wishful thinking.

  “I love you.” He repeated the words, so yes, she’d heard them correctly, but they didn’t compute. Didn’t match what he’d said at the dogfight. Dismantled in a flash all of her carefully constructed arguments for why she’d be fine, just fine, without him.

  He clasped her hand in both of his. “Sunny is on board with this, by the way, although I doubt she’ll approve of my doing it without a bunch of cameras on us.”

  Doing what?

  He looked directly into her eyes. “I love you for your strength and your goodness. I love you because we have a past together and because you’re a friend, my best friend.” He reached out and brushed a finger across her cheek and through her hair. “And you’re beautiful, that’s part of it. An important part, but not the main thing.”

  Was she dreaming? She had to be dreaming. Somehow, it was a lifelong dream she hadn’t known she had, and she didn’t want to wake up.

  He took both her hands then, and sank down onto his knees. “I know there’s not much chance that this will work or that you’ll say yes, but I have to ask. Will you marry me?”

  “I thought you were leaving.” Bisky stared at him, her heart pounding so hard that it was difficult to breathe. “Did you just ask me to marry you?”

  He nodded. “I did.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a little box and opened it. And that was what convinced her that she wasn’t, in fact, dreaming, because the ring he was offering was a pearl. A natural pearl in an antique gold setting, the rarest, most joyous find for an oysterman. How perfect.

  She looked from the ring to his dear face, tears prickling at her eyes as everything she’d ever wanted came together, like a puzzle. She did have William. She wasn’t losing him. William and Sunny got along. She’d have companionship and company and love in her coming years, and it was wonderful.

  “You’re probably thinking about whether I can help support the family,” he said.

  She shook her head, but he went on. “There’s a new job opening up, helping to prepare some of the shoreline kids for college. I heard about it from Trey’s wife, Erica. I’m going to apply for it. But if I don’t get it, I’ll find work. I would work at anything to be with you.”

  “Oh, William.” She slid down then, right into his lap, and he wrapped his arms around her and planted his lips on hers, and it was a kiss for the record books, so powerful and intense and full of love.

  Finally he lifted his head and wiped her tears with his thumbs. “Did you say yes?”

  “No, but yes. Yes, yes, yes.”

  It wasn’t until they’d stood and started walking back to her place, she leaning her head against his shoulder, he with his arm around her, that Sunny came running up the street behind them, calling “Mom, Mom, wait!” She had Kaitlyn and Venus with her, and they all were holding up their phones. “Thanks for making it incredibly hard on us,” Sunny accused William. “All we got was distance shots. How are we going to post that?”

  He turned, Bisky at his side, to face her daughter. “Don’t you even want to know what she said?”

  Sunny laughed. “I don’t even have to ask. It’s written all over your faces.”

  And in our hearts, Bisky thought as she reached out to include her daughter in their embrace. In our hearts.

  EPILOGUE

  THE DAY THEY dedicated the Blue House dawned hot and clear.

  Bisky walked ahead of William and Sunny, who were dawdling, discussing Xena and Muffin and their training as their dogs heeled perfectly beside them. It was nine o’clock in the morning, early for a teenager to be up, and she and William had just gotten back from their Rocky Mountain honeymoon two days ago. They’d been married three wonderful months, but they’d delayed their honeymoon until crabbing season was over. They’d hiked, and kayaked, and made love under the stars. It had been wonderful.

  Mary stood on the po
rch of the Blue House amidst the small crowd that had already gathered, and when she saw William, Bisky and Sunny, she beckoned them to join her there. “Come on, you’re the stars of the show,” she said as she led them toward what was the effective center stage, the top of the steps.

  The real stars, though, were the dogs: Xena, Muffin and the two additional pit bulls they’d rescued from the dogfights. Those two were staying at the Blue House, along with the caretaker they’d gotten just recently, Mandy Smith. She claimed not to be a dog trainer, but she liked dogs and was willing to watch over the small kennel they were developing.

  Sunny was doing the training with William’s help, and loving it.

  As Mary made a little speech, thanking everyone who had helped either financially or physically with getting the Blue House into shape, Bisky looked around. There were Ria and Drew with their daughters. Paul and Amber stood, young Davey at their side. And Erica and Trey were beside Ria and Drew, holding little Hunter.

  As Mary wound up her speech, Sunny hugged her, said a few poised words of her own, and then hurried down the steps to be with her friends. Venus and Kaitlyn gathered to one side, with Caden and Avery beside them. Caden was also helping with the Blue House, staying with Aiden and Avery.

  “What’s the name of the dog program going to be?” someone called out.

  Mary looked over at the teenagers. “Do you want to announce it, Sunny?”

  Sunny smiled and nodded. “Fighters to Friends,” she said. “Because if all goes well, we’ll be training these fighters to be therapy dogs.”

  There was general applause, and then people broke up to look around the facility and partake of the food that Goody had catered: pastries, and fruit, made-to-order omelets and coffee.

  Bisky didn’t love the heat, so she sat down in the shade to cool off. Immediately, William was there to hover over her. “Are you okay? Is this too much for you?”