Pride and Porters

by Charlotte Greene

  Erin felt a tremor of anticipation, even though she knew she shouldn’t get her hopes up. Most breweries couldn’t even hope to be in the running for Western States until their fifth or sixth year, but the chance to go was a dream come true. For every brewery west of the Mississippi, it was the chance of a lifetime. Going to the festival meant a tremendous increase in sales and notoriety, as well as the chance to compete in the major competition. Prizes for winners at Western States had included expensive equipment as well as cash payouts. Even if they won today, they wouldn’t have a chance in hell of winning at Western States, but the press they would get just for going would be incredibly good for business.

  The man onstage started reading off winners of beers that BSB wasn’t participating in, and as the names and prize-winning went on and on, Erin started to feel sick to her stomach. If they won today, or even came close to winning in one of their categories, regardless of whether they got a loan from their father or someone else, they could easily anticipate an increase in sales—maybe enough to stay open another year. For now, that would be enough.

  Their gose came in second in its category, which was a genuine surprise and delight. She and Jen jumped up and down together, arms clasped, and Erin sent Jen up onstage to receive the gift certificate. The room fell silent at the sight of Jen, possibly out of surprise, as she was the first woman since the winners had been announced. She was, as always, beautiful, and Erin had to smile when she saw Charlie’s face as he stared at her up there under the bright lights. He was visibly enchanted.

  Jen rejoined them, and other brewers they knew and some strangers in the crowd in their general area congratulated them. One fan of their gose came up and told them that the other beer had stolen the category, that it really belonged to them. Erin thought that might be the nicest thing a stranger had ever said to her.

  She was so delighted with the second-place win that she had completely tuned out what was happening onstage. Suddenly Jen went deathly pale, and everyone around them fell silent.

  “What? What is it?” Erin asked, alarmed. Everyone looked stunned.

  “We won, Erin,” Jen whispered, eyes wide.

  “Won what? I know we won—you’re holding the gift certificate.”

  The guy at the microphone cleared his throat. “I repeat. The winner of the porter category this year is Bennet Sisters Brewing.”

  Erin’s heart squeezed with shock. At best, she’d hoped to get third or fourth place and beat out their position from last year. She’d had real hopes for winning with the gose because it was so different from what the other breweries had submitted. She hadn’t even hoped to win the porter category. Porters were ubiquitous to most breweries, which meant they had been competing with over fifty others. Yet somehow they’d won.

  For a moment, she and Jen just stared at each other, too stunned to do anything. Then Jen’s eyes teared up, and they leapt into each other’s arms. By the time they pulled apart, Erin was crying too, and the crowd around them was hollering and screaming their approval. Charlie gave Erin and Jen a quick hug and pushed them, gently, toward the stage. They went up together. Erin was glad for Jen’s presence, as her legs felt unsteady. After she took the envelope with their winner’s certificate from the man behind the microphone, she and Jen shook hands with all the judges. Erin’s eyes were so clouded she could hardly see, but she heard all of them congratulate her on a fantastic beer.

  Just before she and Jen rejoined the others, her eyes met Darcy’s in the crowd below them. She was smiling so widely, you might have thought she’d been the one to win.

  Chapter Eight

  Erin coasted to a stop, pausing at the intersection of the trail. From here, she could ride in one of two directions: farther north, toward Fort Collins, or back and around to where she’d started in South Loveland. The bike trail wasn’t a perfect loop yet. Some sections still turned into regular roads for cars, but the two cities had promised to make one long bike path to share within the next couple of years. Erin hadn’t ridden this far on the trail since last year, and the progress surprised her. She pulled out her phone to check the map, trying to decide if she had enough time to head up to see the trail in Fort Collins before going home. Technically, she had the day off, but she needed to go to the brewery once her assistant Javier got in to help him for a couple of hours later this afternoon.

  She was near the Loveland Sculpture Garden, and with the sun beating down on her, the idea of resting in the shade for lunch was inviting. She climbed onto her seat and headed in that direction, a few blocks off the path. It was the middle of the week during the school year, so when she got off and locked her bike, she seemed to have the whole garden to herself.

  Despite its size, Loveland has an enormous public-arts council, in part because of a large-scale bronze sculpture foundry in town. Erin walked by several of the sculptures she remembered seeing when she was younger, pleased to notice new works that had been added since the last time she’d visited. All of the large cottonwood trees were nearly leafless this time of year, but even so, their branches cast large patches of shade. Erin was searching for a particular spot she remembered sitting in before—a small picnic table was there—but she couldn’t quite remember where it was. As she walked around, she paused, taking in several of the bronzes she knew and loved, not in any hurry to get where she was going. She’d already decided to head home after this stop, so she could take her time having lunch.

  She came around a particularly large, life-sized bison and stopped short, so surprised she had to stifle the cry that rose to her lips. Darcy was standing a few feet away, talking on her cell phone. She hadn’t seen Erin yet, as her back was partially to her, but it was obviously her. Erin debated for a long moment and then decided that, should she turn around and return to her bike, Darcy would possibly spot her anyway, and then it would be even more awkward than if she just said hello now.

  Ever since Estes Park and the Brewing Festival, Erin had done her best to avoid Darcy any time she stopped by the brewery with Charlie. So far, she’d managed to get out of seeing her alone. Once or twice she’d noticed Darcy give her a funny look, as if she didn’t quite understand why Erin didn’t try harder to make contact with her, but she also never said anything about it.

  Erin wasn’t entirely sure why she was avoiding her. What had happened in Estes had certainly been awkward, but based on their ease at the Brewing Festival, they’d gotten past it. Her evasion was, however, in part because of what she’d told her about Will. Still, if Erin was honest with herself, it had less to do with the content of that conversation—which was embarrassing and still shameful—and more about how Darcy had made her feel: comforted and safe. Darcy had been tender, nicer than Erin deserved. So why did that make Erin want to run away any time she saw her? Erin shook her head. She didn’t know.

  Erin approached Darcy, shuffling her feet a little to avoid surprising her too much, and Darcy turned toward her, still on the phone. When she recognized Erin, her eyebrows shot up into her hairline. Erin gave her a weak smile and a wave, not sure if she should wait or if she could get away without saying anything.

  “Hold on a minute, honey,” Darcy said on the phone. She put her hand over the mouthpiece and then smiled at Erin. “Fancy meeting you here.”

  “Small world,” Erin said lamely.

  “Let me hang up, and we can see some of this place together,” Darcy said, gesturing with her phone.

  Erin moved away a bit to give her privacy. She couldn’t help but wonder who Darcy had been talking to, especially with that “honey” thrown in. Her face felt hot and warm with embarrassment, and once again she was tempted to run away as fast as she could. She spent the next few seconds taking deep breaths, hoping she could make her excuses without acting like a complete idiot. She heard Darcy say good-bye behind her and made herself turn in her direction with a smile.

  “Sorry about that,” Darcy said, gesturing with her phone. “My sister.”

  “Ah,” Erin said, stran
gely relieved.

  “So what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at work today? I thought you had Tuesday off, not Thursday.”

  Erin was taken aback. Darcy had clearly been paying attention to her schedule. “I had to switch days off with my assistant brewer. He’s working on a special seasonal ale for next year, so he’s sort of taken over the brewery this week.”

  “Interesting,” Darcy said, and from her expression, Erin could tell she meant it. “I’ve reviewed a lot of breweries over the years, but I feel like I’ve learned more in the last couple of weeks than in the last few years, all thanks to you.”

  Again, Erin’s face felt hot under Darcy’s intense gaze, and she forced herself to look away. She gestured at the trail. “Shall we?”

  “Yes. Please. Lead the way.” Darcy joined her, and they started following the path. “Someone in town mentioned this garden, and I kept meaning to get over here. Funny we should bump into each other like this. Do you come here often?”

  “No,” Erin said, not looking at her. “I haven’t been in years.”

  “What a strange coincidence.”

  Erin’s throat felt tight and hot, and she nodded, unable to speak. They were walking side by side through the sculptures on a path narrow enough that their shoulders were almost brushing. Erin thought she could feel heat on Darcy’s side, almost as if she was giving off some kind of internal warmth. A rush of electricity shot through her at the thought, and she struggled not to step farther away from what was undoubtedly an imaginary sensation. Imaginary or not, the feeling built the longer they walked in silence until it spread, first from that side of her body to her other and then throughout. She felt like she was humming with electrical energy, all of it somehow coming from Darcy.

  Finally, she could take it no longer, and she stopped. Darcy seemed surprised, and Erin’s stomach dropped when their eyes met. A hot flash of panic raced through her, and Erin, who had opened her mouth to make an excuse to leave, felt the words die in her throat.

  Darcy lifted her eyebrows, waiting, and Erin snapped her mouth shut, shaking her head. “Nothing,” she said.

  “Do you want to have lunch somewhere?” Darcy asked.

  “With you?” Erin couldn’t help but convey some of her anxiety in the question, and she blushed after she’d spoken.

  Darcy, however, laughed, her head thrown back. “Of course with me. What did you think I meant?”

  Erin shook her head, still blushing, and thought up an excuse. “I meant with just you. Should we call Jen and Charlie?”

  “Why would we?” Darcy asked. “Can’t the two of us eat without them?”

  Erin’s face became even hotter, and she was once again forced to look away to avoid giving something away. Desperately, she searched her mind for an excuse but found nothing. She couldn’t invent a single thing. She glanced at Darcy, ready to say almost anything, but her words dried up again when she met her eyes. Darcy was staring at her with open curiosity and interest, and for a moment, Erin felt as if she were slipping into the dark-gray depths of her eyes. She could feel herself letting go of the edge, and for the first time since she’d seen her on the path, she was happy they’d run into each other.

  “I’d love to,” Erin said.

  Darcy’s face broke into a beautiful, genuine smile, and Erin went warm from the toes up. It was an incredibly heady feeling to make a woman like Darcy smile at her like this.

  “Great! Should we take your car or mine?”

  “I rode my bike,” Erin said.

  Darcy grinned. “Of course you did. How stupid of me. We’ll take mine then, and I can bring you back to your bike afterward. Sound good?”

  “Perfect.”

  This time Darcy led the way, walking slightly in front of Erin, and Erin had a moment alone to watch her from behind. She caught her breath and searched her feelings. What on earth was going on? She still wasn’t sure why she’d been avoiding Darcy. Beyond the fact that they’d had a couple of intense moments together, she barely knew the woman. So why did she feel like she was sinking into quicksand every time she saw her? She shook her head. Darcy was simply being friendly now, and the least Erin could do was respond in kind.

  Darcy was driving a beautiful Mercedes sedan, a rental, judging from the plates. They climbed inside and just sat there for a moment. Erin felt a flash of panic again, wondering what Darcy was doing, but when she turned to her, she was simply staring at Erin, eyebrows raised.

  “Where are we headed?”

  Erin flushed with relief, not sure what she’d expected. Had she thought for a moment that Darcy would make a move on her? Here in the car? Ridiculous. Get yourself together, you idiot, she told herself.

  Erin cleared her throat to disguise her anxiety. “Asian sound good to you?”

  Darcy nodded, and Erin gave her the initial directions, still shaken from what she’d just imagined. Darcy started the car and reversed and then stopped.

  “Oh, crap,” she said, slapping the steering wheel lightly. “I forgot I have to stop by our place really quick. Is that okay? I need to pick something up. I have to do some work later on.”

  “That’s fine. There’s a good place we can go for Asian in Fort Collins, too.”

  “Great. Thanks. Sorry about that.”

  “No problem.”

  They rode in silence for a while as Darcy drove north, and Erin desperately tried to think of small talk. Once again she was struck by how little she knew the woman she was with, but on the other hand, Erin certainly knew her well enough to make simple conversation. Further, as a businesswoman, she was often required to talk to perfect strangers, sometimes for far longer than she would have liked. Why was it so difficult to talk to Darcy?

  Erin looked over at her and then quickly away, her face once again heating up. Whether in profile or straight in, Darcy was gorgeous.

  Oh, Erin thought. I’m an idiot. She was obviously having problems being around Darcy because Darcy was incredibly hot. Darcy’s attractiveness simply drained all of Erin’s suave and cool. Being around Darcy made Erin act like an idiot—that was all. Any time she or Jen had a crush, they used to call this feeling Being Hit with the Stupid Stick. Maybe, Erin thought, if she could just get used to seeing and being around Darcy, she’d regain her usual composure. Erin glanced over at her again and once again made herself wrench her eyes away. Easier thought than done. Her beauty drew her in and swallowed her whole.

  Darcy and Charlie were staying in a house just past the southern border of Fort Collins. Their rental was larger than Jen and Erin’s house, but, like their house, it was older construction and cute. Erin had pictured something huge and monstrous, like her father’s place, but this house was charming, with large, developed trees in the yard and nice stonework. Like a lot of older homes in the area, it had likely been constructed in the early twentieth century, a functional if not beautiful era for houses.

  Darcy seemed to see some of her surprise and gave Erin a wide smile. “Not what you expected?”

  Erin shook her head. “Not exactly.”

  “We managed to get a good deal on it for the next month. Actually, the woman who owns this house is a distant friend of the family. She’s on sabbatical here at the college, and it happened to line up with our visit.”

  Erin followed her inside after she unlocked the door. The house was dark, the curtains drawn against the sun, the wood a dark chocolate. It smelled like citrus and warmth, and the furniture was tasteful and midcentury. It was precisely the kind of place someone with taste and elegance would buy and design, almost as if it was actually Darcy’s real house. Erin took a few steps inside, glancing into the living room and then stopping to wait in the little hallway by the stairs, too nervous to sit down.

  Darcy excused herself and returned a moment later with her laptop bag slung over one shoulder. “Got what I needed. Sorry about that.”

  Erin’s throat was tight, and her heart was racing again. Her nerves, which had settled a little in the car, had ramped u
p, and once again she wanted to run away and out the front door. She’d be safe if they left soon, but being here in this house was making her jumpy and tense. They made their way toward the door, and just as Erin reached out to open it, Darcy touched her shoulder from behind, making her jump.

  “Sorry,” Darcy said, her eyes wide when they met. “I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just going to tell you that I have some nice salmon here in the fridge. What say we stay in for lunch?”

  Erin wanted to decline, the instinct so strong she was desperate for any reason to leave. But it was too late for excuses now. She’d gotten herself into this…whatever it was, and saw no easy way out of it.

  Darcy was frowning slightly, as if she could sense some of Erin’s reluctance, but she looked confused as opposed to hurt. Again, Erin’s mind went blank in the face of Darcy’s guileless eyes. She opened her mouth to say something, anything, and then closed it again. She was done with excuses. Her relief as she accepted this situation gave her strength to smile at Darcy, and Darcy smiled in return.

  “I’d love salmon.” Erin’s throat was still dry, but her terror had disappeared.

  As hard as it was for her to believe, Darcy seemed oblivious to all of Erin’s turmoil. She acted as if nothing was wrong and as if it wasn’t blatantly obvious that Erin was acting strangely. She simply said, “Oh, good. It’s fresh today, so I forgot I wanted to make sure I ate it right away. I was going to make it for dinner, but lunch is even better. Rice pilaf okay as a side?”

  Again, Erin had to lick her lips in order to speak with her dry mouth. “Sounds delicious.”

  Darcy turned toward the kitchen, and Erin followed her for a few steps without saying or doing anything. Her defenses were falling, one brick at a time, as she walked behind this elegant, gorgeous woman.

  They were by the stairs again, and Erin grabbed Darcy’s hand. She turned, frowning a little, and Erin pulled her closer and into her arms before kissing her. Darcy returned the kiss as if she’d expected it. When they pulled apart a few seconds later, they were both breathing hard, Erin trembling all over.