Streamline

by Jennifer Lane

  James defiantly returned his stare. Eventually the man averted his gaze. James exhaled.

  He could barely keep himself still and was filled with restless energy, craving a good run — the only thing that would quiet his racing mind. Since that wasn’t an option, he’d dropped to the floor to pump out some pushups, but after just a couple he realized this position left him too vulnerable.

  So he’d sat on a bench. And sat, and sat, eventually overwhelmed by the images and sounds filling his brain. Repeatedly he saw Mary’s face contorted with rage as that detective hauled him out of Leo’s bedroom in handcuffs. Over and over he heard Leo’s whimpers, barely audible above the current of adrenaline rushing in his body. The vision of Leo’s prone form, the fight finally knocked out of him. Jason’s heated words: “You’re a monster!” Leo’s flinch when he’d hugged him at the state meet.

  James stared at his shaking hands, the hands that had caused such damage to those he loved. He shoved them into the pockets of his pants, disgusted by the sight of them.

  More haunting visions flickered in his mind. He saw Mary standing in the doorway of that petty officer’s apartment, devastated by his betrayal. He’d never wanted to hurt her like that again, but he felt desperate when she’d refused him repeatedly after the accident.

  Forced to look elsewhere for comfort, he’d sampled lots of options, then found the perfect candidate. But she’d wanted nothing to do with him. If only she’d submitted, things would have been so much easier.

  A wave of anger washed through him, and suddenly he remembered the days following his parents’ death when he was eleven. His lone remaining adult relative, his father’s sister, had refused to take him in because she was a single mother raising four children herself.

  James was still furious with his aunt for closing her door, and since then he’d had no contact with his cousins, one of whom was now in prison.

  In the time it took a semi to slam into his parents’ car on the highway, James’s life had transformed from happiness to horror. A social worker had led him straight from the double funeral to a boys’ home, where the other boys had eyed him greedily. He was fresh meat, and they were hungry.

  He’d learned to use his fists to survive. By the time he was placed in a foster home three years later, he was full of rage and had multiple arrests for assault. His foster father was a naval lieutenant who literally whipped him into shape. And though James had hated each strike of the belt, the structure of his new home forced him to apply himself to school, where he found success in both academics and athletics.

  His foster father’s mantra had been “rise above,” and James had done just that. He’d risen above his grief and criminal history to earn a scholarship to the Naval Academy. There he’d met Mary.

  He surveyed the pathetic group in the holding cell once again.

  He was so different than them. He was a father determined to help his son succeed.

  Six hours later Mary and Jason dozed in chairs next to Leo’s bed in the hospital room.

  “Mom?” Leo croaked.

  Mary opened her eyes. “What is it, Leo?”

  “Where’s Audrey?”

  Leo’s question also woke Jason, who yawned and stretched his arms over his head. Mary cleared her throat, smiling sadly. “She’s in another hospital room.” His confusion was evident, and she continued, “Audrey had a miscarriage, honey.” His eyes welled with tears. “No…no. It’s all my fault. And I wasn’t there for her.”

  “I stayed with her, buddy,” Jason said. “Audrey knows you would’ve been there if you could. But you were in surgery.” Mary studied her younger son, who seemed small and so tired against the bank of pillows behind him. “You and Audrey both need to get more rest. Then you can see her for yourself.” Leo continued to cry, but it wasn’t long before the aftereffects of anesthesia and blood loss took over. Mary watched him finally give in. He’d be brimming with self blame again when he woke, she knew.

  They all seemed to blame themselves for what had happened. But assigning blame didn’t make it any better. It only made the pain worse.

  37. Mama Don’t Preach

  Audrey tossed a hostile glance at her mother. “It’d just kill Dad,” she said. “Don’t you know how awful it is for him in there?

  He’l blame himself for not protecting me, and that’l only make serving time worse!”

  Her mother shook her head. “You can’t keep this a secret, Audrey! That’s just ridiculous.”

  Elaine yawned from the other side of the hospital bed and pulled a notebook from her backpack. “Guys, it’s not even seven yet. Let’s not wake up the entire hospital.”

  “Just give me some time,” Audrey pleaded, ignoring her friend.

  “I’ll tell Dad what happened when the time’s right.”

  “The time’s right now. When you get discharged, we’re headed straight to the prison.”

  Audrey sniffed, feeling close to tears. Elaine sidled up and offered a piece of paper.

  “What’s this? A poem?”

  “It’s what you can tell your dad when you see him,” Elaine said.

  Audrey read the scrawled lines and couldn’t help but smile. “Laney, these are they lyrics to ‘Papa Don’t Preach.’”

  “Yep.” Elaine grinned.

  Audrey shook with laughter. “That’d be so funny if I said this to my dad!”

  Elaine channeled Madonna, bursting into a slightly off-key version of the song’s chorus. Audrey joined in, and when they held the last note extra long, they erupted into giggles. It felt wonderful to laugh.

  “Most of the time you act older than your age, Audrey,” her mother said. “But watching you switch from anger to sadness to hysterical laughter in the span of two minutes reminds me you’re a teenager. The pregnancy hormones probably don’t help either.” Audrey’s smile faded. “Sorry I let you down, Mom.”

  “Oh, honey.” Mrs. Rose sat on her bed and reached for her hand.

  “I’m so sorry I haven’t been there for you. You’ve been all alone in this.” Audrey looked down.

  Just then the nurse bustled in for Audrey’s morning check. After she’d confirmed everything to be okay, she left behind a wheelchair.

  At least they let Elaine take the handles.

  Her friend adopted a stuffy English accent, bowing as Audrey lowered herself into the chair. “Your chariot, madam.” Audrey reached behind her to smack Elaine, but before she knew it she was practically airborne. Elaine zoomed her out of the room and booked it down the hallway. They screeched to a halt to avoid collision with a nurse and somehow arrived at the elevator intact.

  “Careful, Elaine!” Her mother came up behind them and pressed the down button.

  “I can’t believe they’re making me use a wheelchair,” Audrey grouched.

  “And I can’t believe you went a freaking one-oh-two in the breast when you were preggers!” Elaine shot back.

  “Say it a little louder next time, Laney. A few patients down the hall didn’t hear you.”

  “Remember, if Leo’s asleep we’re coming right back to your room,” her mother said.

  “I know.”

  “I hope Leo’s okay,” Elaine said.

  Audrey squeezed her eyes shut. “Me too.” As Elaine wheeled her into Leo’s room, Audrey was dismayed to find his eyes still closed. He’d resumed the fetal position, the sheets scrunched around him in disarray. His right wrist and ankle were secured in beige compression wraps. Yet Leo’s face looked almost angelic. She could see the faint outline of a scar on his forehead, which had become part of his features since the last beating by his father.

  Jason stretched out on a chair, snoring softly. His arm hung over the armrest, and a small thread of drool drained down the side of his mouth.

  Audrey’s mother scooted around her and Elaine to hug Mrs. Scott where she sat by the window. Pointing to Leo, she whispered, “We’ll go back to Audrey’s room.”

  “You can stay,” Mrs. Scott whispered back, grimacing.<
br />
  “What’s wrong?”

  Mrs. Scott hesitated. “I forgot my pain medication at home. The past few hours have been a little rough, but I don’t want to wake Jason.” Audrey’s mom immediately held out her hand. “Give me your house keys. I’ll go.”

  “Would you? Honestly, I think I left our front door unlocked.

  It’s not something you think about when you’re climbing into an ambulance with your son. Or when your husband’s just been arrested for putting your son in that ambulance.” Audrey heard Elaine inhale sharply then looked down. She had no idea how they’d lived with the abuse for so long.

  “Where’s the medication?” her mother asked.

  “It’s in my bedroom — in the nightstand next to my bed. But, the drawer’s locked. You will need a key for that.” Digging in her purse for the key, Mrs. Scott glanced at Leo.

  Once she had the key, Audrey’s mother patted her on the arm.

  “I’ll be right back. You girls should let Leo get some sleep. He’s been through a lot.”

  Audrey nodded as her mother left.

  The sound of the door clicking closed woke Jason with a start.

  He had a wild look in his eyes, but seemed to settle down once he recognized his surroundings.

  “Oh, this damn chair,” he groaned, massaging his neck. As he did so, his eyes landed on Audrey, then scanned up behind her.

  Audrey gave him a nervous smile. “This is Elaine. She swims with Leo and me. This is Leo’s brother, Jason, Laney.”

  “How’re you feeling?” Jason asked.

  “Okay. I’d feel better if Leo would wake up.” All eyes turned to look at Leo, who twitched in his sleep.

  “Maybe he’s having a nightmare,” Audrey said. “If somebody beat me up so bad I needed surgery, I don’t think I’d ever sleep again.” She turned back to Jason. “Were you just having a nightmare?” He exhaled. “Yeah, it was stupid. I dreamed Cam accused me of killing her dad. One of those anxiety dreams, you know.” Jason jumped. “Crap, what time is it?”

  “It’s seven-thirty,” Mrs. Scott answered.

  “Oh, man. I gotta get to the courthouse by nine, and my attorney will kill me if I look like this.” He surveyed his wrinkled clothes, and Audrey noticed blood on his jean jacket — probably her blood.

  Jason took Audrey’s hand. “You’ll get through this, tough swimmer chick.”

  “Thank you, Jason. Thanks for being there for me.”

  “Well, I’m a cheap substitute for my brother, but you’re welcome.

  Leo’s a lucky guy.”

  Jason rose, stretched, and gave his mother a peck on the cheek.

  She grasped his arm. “I’m proud of you, Jason.” He winced. “Tell Leo, uh, tell him I’m glad he didn’t die. No, that’s stupid. Tell him…”

  “Tell me yourself,” a voice rasped from the bed. Audrey turned to find Leo’s eyes suddenly glittery and alert.

  “Hey, buddy.” Jason leaned down and gave his brother a careful hug. As Leo returned the embrace, he gave Audrey a sad look. She knew they had a lot to talk about.

  “I have to get to the courthouse,” Jason said. “But I’ll be sending healing thoughts your way.”

  “Just stay away from my girlfriend,” Leo warned with a smile.

  “I heard you say I’m a lucky guy…Don’t be getting any ideas, Jase.” Jason grinned. “Yes, sir.” Walking out he muttered to himself, “I mean, yes, your honor. Yes, your honor. I gotta get that right today.”

  Leo continued to stare at Audrey.

  Mrs. Scott cleared her throat. “I’m sure the nurse will check on you soon, Leo. Until then, Elaine, how about we give these two some privacy?”

  Elaine squeezed Audrey’s shoulder then shot out the door.

  Slowly rising from her chair, Mrs. Scott set her canes in place.

  She looked sternly at Leo. “If I leave you alone with Audrey, do I have to worry about you two making more babies?” A deep crimson bloomed across his cheeks and slowly spread down his neck. Audrey could only imagine how red she was.

  “No, ma’am.”

  “Good. We will discuss this, Leo.” He gave a somber nod.

  “My mom’s making me tell my dad,” Audrey said, unable to keep quiet any longer.

  Leo’s eyes flashed with fear. “Wait, Mom…Where’s Dad?” Mrs. Scott pressed her lips together. “He was arrested last night.” Leo’s eyes widened.

  “Jason called a detective he knew. I assume your father’s at the courthouse awaiting his bail hearing.”

  “Whoa.” Leo turned to gaze out the window. “Everyone’s gonna find out now.”

  “It’ll be okay, Leo. Just focus on getting better.” Mrs. Scott’s voice sounded strangled, and Audrey knew she must be holding back tears.

  Once Leo’s mother left, Audrey stepped out of her wheelchair and crept toward the bed. “I’m so sorry.”

  “You’re sorry? What’re you sorry about? I’m the one who’s sorry.”

  “It was my fault CS found out. He saw the pregnancy test in my purse when it fell off my chair at dinner.”

  “Ohhh.”

  She sniffed. “I’m responsible for you getting beaten so badly.”

  “No. It’s not your fault my dad’s a Coldhearted Satan. Come here.” He grimaced as he scooted back on the bed, then thumped the sheet.

  Audrey’s eyes darted around the room. “Your mom could walk in, or a nurse.”

  “I don’t care.” He lowered his head. “I — I heard about the miscarriage. I’m so sorry you had to go through that alone.” Audrey felt a sob in her chest slowly make its way up her throat.

  She crawled into bed next to him, chest to chest. They’d never shared a bed before.

  Once she was in his arms the tears began. “I was so scared.” She cried as he ran his fingers through her hair. “When I saw you lying there, unconscious…I — I thought you might be…dead.”

  “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” He squeezed her tighter.

  “Te amo, Audrey.”

  She cried harder. “Me destruiría perderte.”

  “It’d destroy me to lose you too. No matter what happens, let’s never lose each other, okay?” His smooth voice was resolute.

  “Okay.” She wiped tears from her cheeks and, despite her best efforts, drifted off to sleep.

  38. Step Number Ten

  Jason sucked air through his teeth as he passed a clock in the courthouse. He rounded the corner and found his attorney, Rob, pacing the hallway outside the courtroom.

  “So you made it,” a husky female voice called behind him.

  Jason spun around to face Detective Easton. Noticing the royal blue T-shirt beneath her black suit jacket, he laughed. “Let me guess, another R.E.M. shirt, Detective?”

  She grinned. “Of course. I have them on rotation.” Her expression grew serious. “How are Leo and Audrey?”

  “Both are in the hospital. Leo had his spleen removed, and Audrey had a miscarriage.”

  “I’m sorry, Mr. Scott.” She clasped his shoulder.

  Noting his attorney’s confusion, Jason explained. “Detective Easton came to the rescue last night. I won’t bore you with the long story, but if you hear James Scott needs a public defender, run as fast as you can.”

  Jason turned to the detective. “Speaking of him, do I need to worry about crossing paths in here?”

  “He’s in a holding cell right now.”

  “I hope you throw the book at him.”

  The detective looked away. “I’ll do my best, but there may be some things out of our control…”

  “What is it?” Jason asked. “What’s going on?”

  “Hey,” Rob interrupted before the detective could speak. “It’s our turn. Let’s go.”

  Jason took a deep breath and followed his attorney into the courtroom, wondering why Detective Easton followed.

  She smiled when he turned to look at her. “I wanted to be here for your sentencing — see this thing through.” The judge wasn�
��t ready, so Jason had a moment to survey the scene. He noticed Cameron and Marcus, and his cheering party of two gave him a wave. Although he’d waited almost two months for his sentencing, the additional delay now seemed interminably long.

  His leg wouldn’t stop jiggling. The detective leaned in. “What happened to your mom?” she asked. “I mean, why does she use canes to get around?”

  Jason looked down.

  “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

  “It’s okay. She got in a really bad car accident a while back.” He looked over at Detective Easton. “She almost died.” The detective simply nodded.

  “The thing is, she was a great driver. I can’t figure out how she crashed so bad. It’s not like she has road rage like my dad or anything.”

  “The commander has road rage? I would’ve never guessed!” Jason sighed. “My dad wasn’t always such an asshat, you know.”

  “You don’t have to explain.”

  “It’s just that he didn’t always hate us so much. Sure, he was hard to please from the get-go, but at least I felt like he cared. He told us we were Scotts, and that meant we were special.” He shook his head. “Sometimes that man’s ego is the size of a house.” Reflecting a moment, he added, “And his heart’s the size of a tic-tac.” The detective laughed. “Seems like he’s gotten pretty far in life, though, being a commander and all.”

  “He’s one charming SOB. He and my mom are both aeronautical engineers — I don’t even know what that is. But his emotional IQ is the pits.”

  She tilted her head to the side. “How’s your emotional IQ?”

  “Alcoholics suck at dealing with their feelings. I’ve got a long way to go.”

  “Still on step number nine?”

  “Actually, my sponsor said I’m ready for ten.”

  “What’s that again?”

  “Taking personal inventory, admitting when we’re wrong.” Jason scoffed. “Something my father would never do.” Just then an “All rise!” boomed over the courtroom. As they stood for the judge, the detective leaned in.