Mrs. Harrison turned to Joanna and Mariah. “Ladies, I am so pleased you could attend. I have been so anxious that our numbers would not be even. Of course, that is not your concern tonight. Please come in, Sophia is just there by the piano.” She motioned to the instrument then spun away.
Joanna curtsied lightly and looked where Mrs. Harrison had indicated. There stood Sophia Harrison beside Mr. Aldridge, whose blue eyes pierced Joanna even at that distance. Joanna felt a strange desire to go to him, but the look in Miss Harrison’s eyes convinced her to stay away. She looked around the room for someone else to engage and spotted Mariah, who had stepped to the side of the room and was surveying a painting. Joanna joined her, ignoring the desire within her to speak to Mr. Aldridge instead.
The painted landscape before her was beautiful. There was something familiar in the work, an undefinable quality Joanna had admired before.
“I see you are admiring our newest piece of artwork,” Miss Harrison said from behind her.
Joanna turned to find Miss Harrison standing with Mr. Aldridge. She felt his gaze on her, yet kept her own focused on Miss Harrison. She was not certain her emotions could withstand the compassion in his eyes.
“It is lovely,” she said to Miss Harrison.
“Who is the artist?” Mariah inquired.
“Why Mr. Aldridge, of course!” Miss Harrison laughed.
Joanna’s gaze flew to his. Though his expression remained even, a hint of a smile teased his eyes. Of course, she thought, hiding her own smile. She ought to have recognized his work, as she had observed it in her own foyer on more than one occasion.
“Father acquisitioned it from him just last week,” Miss Harrison announced, tilting her head. “Father favored a different piece but I insisted nothing else would do but this one.”
“You made a fine choice,” Mariah said evenly, examining the painting again. “Though I do think I prefer the piece he gave my sister.”
A triumphant smile lit Mariah’s face at Miss Harrison’s scowl. Not even the glare Joanna gave her took the grin from Mariah’s face.
Joanna felt her face flush as Miss Harrison looked at her with suspicion. “Mr. Aldridge gave you a painting? Interesting indeed.”
“Do you not think Mr. Aldridge a kind man?” Mariah asked.
Miss Harrison’s scowled at Mariah. “Of course I do.”
“Then why should his bestowing a gift surprise you?” Mariah asked.
Joanna stole a glimpse at Mr. Aldridge. He was peering down at her, searching her face, and she became ensnared in his captivating gaze.
Miss Harrison remained silent, but laid her hand on his arm possessively. He shifted his gaze toward her and Joanna saw the warmth drop from his expression. Joanna looked away as quickly as she could, her heart racing with the rush of emotion that threatened to be unleashed.
“Oh, look! The Lewes have arrived. Have you been introduced to them yet, Mr. Aldridge?” Miss Harrison asked.
“I have not.”
“Won’t you come meet them? Harriette Lewes is my dearest friend.”
“I would be honored.”
Joanna could feel his gaze on her again before he walked away, but she could not bring herself to meet his eyes. Mariah left Joanna to join some friends and Joanna watched the company mingle, waiting for the upset within herself to calm. When no change occurred, she made her way toward the large windows. She had always envied the Harrisons, as their drawing room faced the ocean, giving them optimal views of the sea. As it was dark, the waves could not be seen; however, simply knowing they were there, just beyond the stretch of her vision, brought peace enough to bring her emotions back into her control.
Another reflection joined hers in the glass. Mr. Aldridge stood just behind her, gazing out into the darkness as well.
“Are you all right, Miss Leighton?” His deep voice was quiet and stirring.
“I will be,” she said, never taking her eyes from the dark window. He was silent and she felt the need to say something. “I do not know why, but the ocean has always provided me with comfort. It calms me in a way very little else can.”
“I thought you said you were doing better.”
She tried to ignore the hint of accusation in his voice. “I was yesterday, but not every day can be a good day.”
His reflection nodded. “That, I can understand, though I wish it could be so.”
The tenderness in his voice made her heart swell. She looked at him at last. Sincerity melted with another emotion she could not name in his expression. The result left her breathless. He really is quite handsome.
“As do I.”
They turned away from the window as one, facing the room again. “Will your friends be joining us this evening?” Mr. Aldridge asked.
Joanna searched the room, realizing she had not seen Edith yet. “Yes, in fact I am surprised they are not here by now.”
“Your sister is close in age to Miss Harrison, if I am not mistaken.”
She nodded. “Unfortunately, they do not get along as well as I wish they would. They used to be good friends, but I do not know what separated them.”
A smiled teased at his mouth. “I did notice some discord between them.”
Joanna looked pointedly at Mariah. “Yes, I apologize if Mariah embarrassed you earlier. She has a tendency to speak out of turn.”
“It was nothing.” His gaze landed on her. “I could not help but notice your discomfort though.”
Joanna felt her cheeks color again. Cursed things. “I assure you, it was only regarding my sister’s rudeness.”
He was silent.
She glanced at his face and noticed he was looking across the room, pleasure clearly discernible in his expression. What could he be so pleased about?
Before she had a moment to investigate, he stiffened and the very air around him became tense.
Miss Harrison glided toward them, her gaze fixed on Mr. Aldridge.
She beamed up at him, leaning close as she did so. “I wondered where you had disappeared to.” She pouted. “Why did you abandon me?”
“I had a question for Miss Leighton.”
Miss Harrison looked at Joanna, poison in her glare. “What could you want of Miss Leighton?”
Afraid he might reveal her struggles, Joanna spoke rashly. “It was of a personal matter.”
“A personal matter?” Her eyebrows arched as she looked between them. “I did not realize you were so intimate with one another.”
Joanna looked to the door as it opened and was relieved to see the butler show in Edith, Hugh and their parents. Joanna made eye contact with her friend across the room. Edith said something to her brother and they made their way to Joanna.
Miss Harrison continued to glare at Joanna, as if expecting her to deny any familiarity with Mr. Aldridge. The silence had gone on so long, Joanna felt she must say something. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, Edith and her brother stepped next to her.
Mr. Colborne bowed. “Miss Harrison, thank you for inviting us this evening.”
Miss Harrison curtsied. “We are happy to have you.”
“Mr. Aldridge.” Mr. Colborne nodded to the gentleman before turning to Joanna. “Miss Leighton, such an honor.”
Joanna smiled, grateful for their timely arrival. “A pleasure as always, Mr. Colborne.”
Mr. Aldridge surprised Joanna by bowing to Edith. “Miss Colborne, how are you this evening?”
Joanna could tell by Edith’s expression that she was just as astonished as Joanna was. Mr. Aldridge had never addressed her before tonight.
“I am very well, Mr. Aldridge. Thank you.”
“I am glad to hear it.”
Miss Harrison’s narrowed eyes looked at each of them in turn, the smile she gave clearly counterfeit. “Well, isn’t this lovely?” She looked toward the door. “I did think dinner would be announced by now.”
At that moment, the butler opened the doors. “Dinner is served.”
“Oh, at last,” Miss Harrison breathed.
Mr. Colborne leaned close to Joanna. “For some reason, I highly doubt it is hunger that fuels Miss Harrison’s desire to dine.”
Joanna repressed her laugh enough that Miss Harrison did not seem to notice.
As they made their way to the door to be paired up, Mr. Aldridge remained close to Joanna’s side. A part of her hoped he would be her escort. She realized her hopes were in vain when Mrs. Harrison strode over.
“Sophia, Mr. Aldridge, will you please come forward?”
He gave a polite nod, then walked forward with Miss Harrison hanging from his arm.
Joanna found herself on the arm of Mr. Lewes, a pleasant but flirtatious man, and seated between him and Mr. Colborne at dinner. The meal passed pleasantly and she found herself more than suitably entertained by her companions. Only, she found herself wishing for Mr. Aldridge’s company instead. He sat near the head of the table between Mrs. and Miss Harrison, and though they seemed delighted to have him to themselves, he seemed far less pleased. He was as guarded as he’d been the first night they’d met, his expression just as stern. Joanna thrilled at the realization that he was far warmer to her than to the general public. Though she did wonder why he insisted on such coldness to others.
The company of her friends lifted some of the weight from her shoulders, and she reveled in the rare sense of peace that came over her. When the women retired to the drawing room, she fell into step with Edith behind Miss Harrison.
“He is so very quiet and I cannot make him out,” Miss Harrison whispered loudly to Miss Lewes. “But Papa says he would be a fine suitor, so I will continue in my efforts to win his affections.”
“Can you imagine being the wife of an artist? How romantic!” Miss Lewes exclaimed in her own loud whisper.
A wave of jealousy rolled over Joanna. For a reason she could not identify, she hated the idea of Miss Harrison marrying Mr. Aldridge. Suddenly, she saw in her what Mariah must see. Her overt flirtations, the pretentious manner in which she spoke to others. Even the way she carried herself cried for attention. Joanna disliked her immensely and took care to remain at a distance from her.
The men joined them a short time later, dispersing among the women. Joanna noticed Mr. Aldridge standing alone, investigating the paintings in the room.
She must have watched him longer than she realized, for Edith said, “Mr. Aldridge is a strange sort of person, is he not?”
“What do you mean?”
“In every social situation I have seen him in, he seems intent on being displeased.”
Joanna pondered this. “I do not think he is displeased as much as he is uncomfortable.”
“Really? Has he said something to you regarding this?”
“No, not at all, but it is the impression I have received lately.” Joanna hesitated to go on, knowing the response she would receive. “He speaks to me easily, but when others join us, there is a tension in the air that does not exist when we are alone.”
The smile that crept onto Edith’s face was confirmation her thoughts had ventured where Joanna had predicted they would.
“Imagine that.” Edith’s grin turned sly. “Perhaps I will leave you then, so that he may be encouraged to come speak to you.”
“Edith, please that is unnecessary—”
Before she could even finish, Edith walked away with laughter in her eyes.
Within moments, Mr. Aldridge approached, his stern expression replaced by a small smile. “You seem to be in better spirits.”
Joanna smiled in return. “Yes, I am fortunate my friends have that effect on me.”
“I am glad for it. It pains me to see you in such distress.”
A brief look of astonishment crossed his features, as if he’d surprised himself with the words. But a moment later, his eyes turned soft and she sunk into their depths.
A man cleared his throat near her and she turned in surprise.
“Father!” she cried. “I did not hear you approach.”
He held his hands behind his back, his head tilted to one side. “Hello, Joanna. I hope I am not interrupting?”
“Of course not.” Joanna stepped back to make the introduction. “Father, this is Mr. Colin Aldridge, a new neighbor here in Roselund Heights. Mr. Aldridge, my father, Mr. Leighton.”
Father held out his hand. “It is good to meet you, sir.”
Mr. Aldridge shook hands with her father and she could see the firm grasp each put into the greeting. Her father’s eyes did not waver from Mr. Aldridge’s, and Mr. Aldridge returned his direct gaze.
“The pleasure is mine,” Mr. Aldridge said. “How are you enjoying your visit?”
“Very well indeed. I often find my trips to Roselund Heights exhausting, but this one in particular has been quite nice,” Father said.
Joanna’s stomach dropped. He usually found his visits exhausting? The only difference between this visit and his others was that she had relinquished her control over their schedule. She swallowed against the lump that appeared in her throat. Father does find my planning tiring. A wave of sorrow overcame her and she pressed her lips together in an effort to keep it at bay.
“How long have you lived here?” Father asked.
“Nearly two months is all.”
“And how do you like it?”
“To be honest, I am impressed. The views are superb, the town delightful, and the people are perfectly lovely.”
Joanna felt his gaze on her as he finished his description, but she ignored it, concentrating instead on keeping her tears within. She could not allow herself to fall apart here. Yet her efforts were not enough to keep the pain from her face.
Her father placed his hand on her elbow. “Joanna, what is it? Are you unwell?”
Joanna shook her head. “No. I am fine.” She could hear the quaver in her voice and cursed herself for letting her emotions go again.
“You do not look well,” Father said. “Shall I call your uncle?”
Humiliation raced through Joanna. “No, Father, that is most unnecessary.”
“Perhaps some fresh air?” Mr. Aldridge asked and she could hear the concern in his voice.
She shook her head again. “It is only a headache. Perhaps I ought to go home.”
“Of course, let me see you to the carriage,” Father offered.
Joanna looked at his chin, unwilling to let him see the pain she was feeling. “No, Father. It is impolite for me to leave as it is; it would be nothing short of an insult if we both left. I will be well enough.”
“I’ll not leave you in this state,” he insisted.
Edith appeared in front of her. “Mr. Leighton, will you allow me to see Joanna home? You do not have an opportunity to see your friends often.”
“Thank you, Miss Colborne, but there is no need.”
“I insist, sir.” She took hold of Joanna’s other arm and patted her hand. Even without looking, Joanna knew Edith’s convincing smile was in place. “I will make certain she gets home safely and gets to bed.”
Joanna’s father hesitated. “If you are certain?”
“I am,” Edith said pleasantly.
He lightly kissed Joanna’s hand before releasing her arm. “Take care, Joanna. I’ll look in on you when I arrive home.”
Joanna smiled what small pitiful smile she could. “Thank you. Please make my apologies to Mrs. Harrison.”
“Of course.”
As Joanna and Edith turned to walk away, another hand reached out, grasping Joanna’s fingers. She looked up automatically, Mr. Aldridge’s blue eyes examined hers. “Is there anything I can do for you?”
She wanted to say yes, if only to relieve the anxiety in his open expression, but she could not as there was nothing to be done. Tears pricked at her eyes, threatening to overflow. She shook her head quickly and pulled her hand from his.
“Please, let’s go,” she whispered to Edith.
Edith led her by the arm out the door, collected their wraps and propelled her out to the waiting carriage. As soon as
she collapsed on the seat, Joanna’s tears flowed freely and she buried her face in her hands. Edith sat beside her, her arm around her shoulders. When they reached Joanna’s house, Edith took her arm again and saw her upstairs to her bedchamber. Once Joanna had changed into her nightgown, she sat on her bed, pulling the blankets up around her. Edith slipped off her shoes and climbed beneath the blanket beside her.
“Tell me about it, Joanna.”
Fresh tears escaped as she told Edith of her father’s simple confession, but what it truly meant.
“I have been chasing away everyone I’ve ever cared about. All I wanted was to help, to keep our lives in order. Yet that is precisely the opposite of what I have accomplished.”
“You ought to speak to your father. I am certain he did not mean what you suppose. And you are improving, are you not? Your father said this trip was more enjoyable.”
“I have been ignoring my instincts. I have been letting go of things I wished I could speak my mind on. And I have been driven nearly mad. Yet, I still cannot control my emotions.” Joanna thought of all the guests at dinner, how they all must have talked once she had gone. “I am so embarrassed.”
“All will be well. These things take time, Joanna. You are making an effort and improving. No one can ask for more than that. Change is difficult, but if it is a change you truly want to make, then it will be worth it.”
Joanna looked at her hands, then inhaled deeply. “I know I am making progress, and I have already seen the benefits in my relationships. I only wish it was not so painful.”
Though sunshine danced through the window, Joanna wished for clouds. They would better suit her melancholy mood. She wished to walk along the sea, certain the brisk chill would lift her spirits. After the previous evening, however, she was not keen to go out into society.
She paced with frustration across the green rug on her bedroom floor. One day had completely changed her. Her emotions had been secure, taut, only causing slight pangs from time to time. Now she could scarcely breathe without fear of displacing them. Every decision was questioned, wondering if she was being too controlling. One thing was certain, she did not know how much longer she could continue in such a manner.
Healing Hearts (Roselund Heights Book 1) Page 7
