Caught in Darkness
Page 20
“I know,” she interrupted, cutting off whatever it was he was about to say. “I know it’s impossible. And I know in a lot of ways it’s my fault I feel like this now, but I…I love you.” Well, if you’re going to chase him away, you might as well get it all out there first.
Seth grunted something beside her ear and the next thing she knew he had rolled them over, pinning her again beneath him as his lips crashed onto hers. His tongue plunged into her mouth in the same instant as he surged into her, filling her completely and making her gasp against his lips.
Veronica was breathless as he took her with a passion and intensity that he hadn’t yet shown her. His lips tore from hers after a long minute, allowing her to breathe as he blazed a trail of kisses over her jaw and down her still-healing throat. He skimmed right over the puncture wounds from their previous round of lovemaking, instead letting his kisses linger over her collarbone as he continued to thrust into her. Her body was burning beneath his, her hands curled over his flexing spine and her head thrown back as she lifted her hips to meet his pace.
The sounds of sweaty skin slapping sweaty skin accompanied by the metal headboard bouncing into the wall and her own less than quiet moans filled the room as they moved together with a sense of unspoken urgency. His hand skimmed over her thigh, up her stomach, and curled around her breast as he recaptured her lips with his, swallowing her next moan with a muffled growl. And as their tongues danced together again he surged into her one more time, sending them both flying.
Veronica still hadn’t regained her breath when he eased out of her and rolled onto his back, tugging her into his side as he moved. She watched his chest rise and fall and focused on synchronizing their breathing until she was no longer gasping for breath.
“I can’t stay,” Seth finally said, his voice quiet and remorseful. And it was in those simple words—as well as the aftermath of their intimacy—that Veronica heard the words he couldn’t say.
She wished she could find comfort in that knowledge.
****
Late Monday morning Veronica found herself walking absently through the park, her mind far away from her surroundings. She’d been sound asleep when Seth had gotten home after his search and he’d still been talking quietly with Jasen when she’d dragged herself out of the bedroom shortly before eight. He hadn’t particularly liked the idea of letting her walk around the city by herself, despite the unobstructed sunlight, but she had insisted. She needed some time to herself, in a neutral place, where she could just breathe. She was hoping—futilely—that a little fresh air would supply the perfect solution for what was suddenly her most pressing problem.
So far the fresh air was failing her.
“Veronica? What a surprise!”
Her stomach clenched even as her feet politely came to a stop. Cliff was the last person she wanted to have to deal with. Still, she somehow managed to resist the juvenile urge to launch into a sprint and leave him eating her dust.
Cliff came up to her with a smile, arms loose at his sides. “I was wondering why you weren’t in the coffee shop today. Day off?”
She opened her mouth to answer his rhetorical question when she finally remembered why she’d been so angry at him before. And as soon as she remembered that inappropriate, unwanted kiss her polite almost smile fell into a frown and she crossed her arms over her chest. She wasn’t stuck at work, where she was expected to have professional manners, nor was she trapped in a social setting devised by her well-meaning mother. She could finally tell him exactly what she thought of his advances; it was just unfortunate for him that she was already in a less than great mood.
“You know,” Cliff was already continuing, “it’s good that we met up outside of the café, though. I can’t figure out a socially-acceptable way to ask you to dinner when you’re working, but I definitely—”
“Are you serious?” Veronica asked incredulously. “You’re seriously standing there thinking you have a chance in hell of getting me to go anywhere with you?”
Cliff faltered, eyes widening.
“I don’t even like you!” As sad as it was, it felt fabulous to finally be able to say that. “And after you failed—on more than one occasion—to take the hint you turned around and kissed me! In front of my mother! While I was at work!” She was amazed that she wasn’t yelling, though from the expression on his face she suspected she might as well have been. He looked like a kicked puppy.
“I…had no idea,” Cliff said carefully, disappointment heavy in his voice.
She knew she should feel guilty. She knew she should probably have tried to find a nice, gentle, non-confrontational or accusatory way of telling him to leave her alone. She knew her mother was going to hear about this and then they’d be arguing again. But she just didn’t care. She needed to get him out of her life so that she could focus on the myriad of real problems popping up around every corner.
“Well now you know,” Veronica declared shortly. “Next time you’re interested in a woman, try paying attention to her first. Look for a sign that she’s interested too before you start hitting on her.” She turned, then, and resumed walking. She had nothing left to say to him.
She passed a sidewalk bench, a tall garbage pail, and a couple of trees before her mind returned to the subject she’d been obsessing over since the previous night. A sigh escaped her lips and her pace slowed. What am I supposed to do? Their respective jobs weren’t the problem. She was more than willing to walk away from hers if that was what it took to keep him in her life, and she didn’t have a problem with the fact that his job literally took him all over the world. She was even willing to move with him, though she knew that she wouldn’t see her mother or Allison as often as she was used to.
But the problem was deeper than that. The simple truth was that he was immortal and she wasn’t. He had already lived over two hundred years and he had countless centuries ahead of him. She had lived over two decades and all she had left was—at best—a large handful more. In the basest of ways they were entirely incompatible.
But, if that’s true, then why is it so hard to think about watching him walk away?
She stopped walking, her arms coming up around herself as her eyes squeezed shut. Suddenly she imagined she understood the pain her father had felt right before his heart stopped, because having something sharp stabbing into it couldn’t hurt more than she did in that moment. And that was a great reminder. Her father had given up everything to make a life with her mother and still they had been separated far too early.
Veronica’s eyes snapped open, her breath catching in her throat, as an idea occurred to her. The one thing she hadn’t considered was following in her father’s footsteps—giving up everything in order to stay with the man she’d fallen in love with. If I were a vampire this wouldn’t even be an issue. It was true. But that would require her leaving her mother and Allison and everyone she’d ever known behind—largely without even being able to say goodbye. Could she do it?
Can I let him go?
****
Seth was leaning back against his couch, running through the list of places he and Jasen had cleared in an effort to deduce where Richards and the Wilson brothers could be hiding, when Veronica settled next to him and asked a question that thoroughly ruined his concentration.
“How do people become vampires, exactly?”
“What?” Seth found himself asking, lifting his head and turning his attention to the blonde beside him.
She gave him a funny look and said, “You heard me. I remember you saying once that you’d been ‘Turned’ when you were twenty-eight, and you also said that vampires can’t reproduce. So how do people become vampires?”
Seth swallowed. His instincts were screaming at him that this was a dangerous topic and should be avoided at all costs, so he asked, “Why do you want to know?”
Arching a slender brow at him, Veronica countered, “Why are you acting like you don’t want to tell me? I’ve asked all kinds of questions over the las
t couple of weeks, remember? I’m just curious.”
She was right, of course. He couldn’t even explain why he was afraid of answering this question, but logic assured him he was being irrational. Releasing a breath, Seth replied, “In order to be Turned vampire blood has to be introduced into a human’s bloodstream in their last moments of life. Bleeding into a human’s open wounds and then killing them quickly is usually how most vampires Turn another, but there are other ways.”
Veronica’s expression was thoughtfully curious as she nodded and asked, “So drinking vampire blood doesn’t do it?”
Seth’s lips twitched and he shook his head. “No, it doesn’t.”
Veronica nodded again and this time a frown marred her lips. “Then you’ve…died?”
“That was a long time ago,” Seth replied. “I’ve made peace with it.” She was searching his eyes for proof of his words so he offered her a gentle smile and reached over, covering her nearest hand with one of his. “I would never have met you if I hadn’t been Turned, you know.”
Her expression eased and she smiled. “You make a good point.” After a moment of comfortable silence something shifted in her gaze and she pulled her lip between her teeth before saying, “Actually, I…I’ve been thinking about something.”
His eyes narrowed as his stomach clenched again. She was hedging and he couldn’t help but worry that he knew why. He didn’t know what he’d say if he was right.
“Seth,” Veronica began, shifting her hand so that she could properly hold his, “I want to stay—”
The buzzing of his cell phone interrupted her, cutting off what she was about to say and buying him some precious time to figure out his response. Giving her hand a squeeze he quickly snatched the phone up and put it to his ear, saying, “Hunter.”
Robert’s voice was rushed on the other end of the line when he said, “Troy Wilson was spotted outside of town, to the East. I just got off the phone with the man who saw him. He should still be there.”
For once Robert’s timing couldn’t have been better. “Call me if you hear anything else. I’ll check it out.” He hung up without waiting for Robert’s response and offered Veronica an honestly apologetic look as he said, “I’m sorry. One of the Wilsons was just spotted. I have to go.”
Veronica released a frustrated breath and nodded. She leaned forward quickly, pressing her lips to his, and whispered, “Good luck.”
He nodded gratefully, releasing her hand and pushing to his feet with his phone still in his other hand. He wanted to tell her he loved her—just like he’d wanted to the previous night, when she’d confessed to him—but he knew better. If she had any idea how much it would kill him to walk away from her when the time came he was afraid she’d go through with what she’d been about to say. And he refused to take her away from her peaceful, normal life.
But there was time enough to deal with that later. He needed to get to the eastern edge of town, and he needed to call Jasen so that they could meet there. Maybe, once he’d finally put an end to Richards’s threat, he could figure out how to break her heart.
****
Veronica was restless. Seth had only been gone twenty minutes—maybe—and she couldn’t sit for more than a couple of minutes before she was on her feet and walking aimlessly through the condo. She couldn’t decide if she was frustrated with that phone call Seth had received or actually glad for it. Earlier, when she’d been going over the pros and cons of asking him to Turn her, she’d decided it was ultimately worth it. Becoming a vampire would allow her to stay with him, and that was what she wanted the most. That part hadn’t changed, but now that she was alone again she was doubting herself. What if she had misinterpreted his behavior last night? What if he wasn’t in love with her?
Idiot. If he doesn’t love you then he won’t Turn you.
It seemed simple enough, and the logic of the thought was perfectly straightforward. But it didn’t help. He’d never said aloud how he felt, but the night before she had been so sure that now she wasn’t sure if she was just panicking or if she was right to be second-guessing herself. And she knew that she wasn’t going to find her answer by just lounging around in his condo while he was out fighting the evil vampires. But I need to figure it out tonight. If they won this fight then this could be her last chance to keep him in her life. To do that she needed her answer.
She was standing in the bedroom, hands on hips and frowning when she realized that she had wandered out of the living room. And then her eyes landed on her keys, resting innocently on the nightstand alongside her phone charger, and an idea struck her. Maybe I can figure things out out there.
Her keys were in her hand a beat later, and then she’d turned and started down the hall confidently. It was a different enough idea that it just might inspire her and help her come to a final decision, and that was exactly what she needed. Not that Seth would approve. But that didn’t matter at the moment, since he was busy. And, fortunately, Jasen had brought over her car after he’d finished with Dennis, so she had her own transportation.
Cemeteries really were creepier at night, even if the sun was only barely set and the sky hadn’t yet reached its darkest. Veronica pulled in a deep breath, clicking on the emergency flashlight that she kept in her car, and reminded herself that zombies still weren’t real (because, yes, she’d asked). She found the small cement path easily enough and followed it as far as she could before branching off and navigating her way past a row of old headstones until she found the one she was looking for. As always, as soon as her eyes landed on the weather-worn surface of her father’s headstone a level of sadness settled over her heart.
“Hi, Dad,” she whispered as she knelt carefully on the thin green grass. “I know it’s late, but…I thought if anyone could understand the situation I’m stuck in, it would be you.” She swallowed and sighed heavily, releasing the flashlight in order to curl her hands in her lap. Suddenly she wished she had known the version of her father that had acknowledged vampires and werewolves, so that she could better gauge how he might have reacted to everything that was currently going on in her life.
But it wasn’t like she hadn’t known him at all. She knew—after having met her uncle—that he had changed a lot when he chose Carol over the Claypool legacy. So the reaction that Ronald Claypool might have had would probably have been different than the reaction that Ronald Wyndham would have had. The better question, then, was how would her father have reacted?
Your father always believed you could be anything you wanted. They were her mother’s words, and when she’d said them she had been arguing Veronica’s decision to work part-time at a coffee shop, but they had stuck with her for an entirely different reason. Her mother had just volunteered that reference, despite her tendency to avoid any and all mentions of her late husband. And now, several years later, those words held such a different meaning than her mother could ever have imagined.
She had to believe her father had been the kind of Slayer who didn’t hate supernatural beings simply because they existed, just like she had to believe that he would understand what her heart kept telling her. She felt like she had finally found her place, after a lifetime of wandering, and that place was at Seth’s side. But in order to embrace that destiny she was going to have to leave behind the life her father had tried to build for her and her mother.
Tears in her eyes, Veronica said, “You gave me my foundation, Dad. I’ll never forget that. But the life you were raised in wasn’t the one you were meant for, and I’ve realized that that’s where I’m standing now.”
As hard a decision as it was, there was no doubt in her mind now. She hated the idea of hurting the people she’d be leaving behind, but she would be leaving them behind one way or another even if she stayed. Her heart was in Seth’s hands and a body couldn’t survive without its heart. Now all that she had left to do was convince him of what she’d come to realize: they were meant to be together.
Swallowing again, Veronica reached out and lightly
traced her fingertips over the writing on the headstone. “I’m sorry, Dad…but, if this goes how I want it to, then…this is goodbye.”
“Funny,” a vaguely-familiar male voice called from somewhere behind her, “I could almost say the same thing.”
Veronica started, her head snapping up and to the side even as she very belatedly registered the faint prickling sensation at the base of her skull. She was just so used to it now that she hadn’t even realized she shouldn’t have been feeling it. And then her eyes landed on a largely-hidden figure that was leaning against the side of a tall tombstone between her and the path to safety.
“I’m sorry,” the vampire said, “Did I startle you? I was under the impression you could sense me.”
She wasn’t sure who this vampire was, but it wasn’t Richards. Richards’s voice was ingrained in her memory. But this voice wasn’t entirely unfamiliar, either. Where have I heard it before? There was only one way to find out. “Who are you? What do you want?”
“That’s sort of insulting,” the vampire commented without moving away from the tombstone. “I mean, you have seen me before. Still, I suppose this is the first time we’ve actually met.”
Veronica ran through her list of vampires-she’d-seen-but-never-met and discovered that it was rather short. And she knew exactly who she was dealing with now. Tobias Wilson, Richards’s apparent right-hand. Her mouth went dry and she had to swallow to manage, “Tobias, right? You still haven’t said what you want.”
“Very good,” Tobias replied smoothly. He vanished from sight, then, before reappearing, leaning over the back of her father’s headstone and asking, “By the way, did Daddy Slayer help you find the answer you were looking for? I’d hate to have interrupted the moment.”
Veronica threw herself backwards on reflex when he appeared within arm’s reach. In her haste she accidentally knocked her purse over, out of reach, and sent her flashlight rolling away. And as she opened her mouth to question his taunting words something clicked in her head. “Oh my god,” she mumbled, her eyes wide and locked on his. Dread was pooling rapidly in the bottom of her stomach. “It was you.”