by Heinzer, HB
Carly felt sick to her stomach when she realized it was happening again. This time, Carly told herself it was temporary, only until Julia could digest everything she'd already learned about the past, but was it really? Or was Carly worried her own relationship would fail, and she didn't want to jeopardize the chance at reconnecting with one of her oldest friends?
One thing was certain, the actions of their parents totally screwed up both Julia and Carly, and they allowed those experiences to skew any chance they had at happiness.
***
“Seriously, Micah, what the fuck was that all about?” Adam asked once the girls had run off to do whatever it was they were doing. Micah dropped them off in front of the mall, telling them he'd be back in two hours to pick them up.
Micah shrugged. “Sorry man, sounded good at the time.” He grabbed the new Darius Rucker CD out of his visor and put it in the stereo. “I still don't see why you don't tell her. She wouldn't be pissed now, but when she finds out and realizes you didn't tell her, then she'll have your balls in a vice.”
“And you would be the resident expert on what happens when Julia finds out you're a lying coward, aren't you?” As soon as he said the words, Adam regretted them. It's not that they weren't true, but he genuinely did want to give Micah the benefit of the doubt this time.
“Low blow,” Micah grumbled, turning up the stereo, effectively ending any conversation. Luckily, they were just about to the home improvement store because an icy chill filled the truck’s cabin.
They silently walked through Home Depot, filling the cart with new door and window locks, as well as various supplies Micah said he needed to do some other work he'd been hired to do around Julia's house. Since Annie's parents were footing the bill, it was easier to get everything at once.
“Hey, sorry about what I said earlier,” Adam said as they loaded the truck. “Honestly, not telling people back here about us is more Carly's thing than mine. But it is what it is, and I'm not about to screw things up with her right now.”
Micah set down the box he had picked up and stared at Adam. “This shit with the two of you is pretty serious, huh?”
Adam thought about it for a minute. Was it serious? Sure, they were spending as much time together as possible, but what did that mean? “Yeah, I think it might be. Come on; let's go grab a beer while we wait for them to get done.”
For the next hour, two grown men sat across from one another in the bar gossiping like schoolgirls. Adam told Micah how he and Carly had gotten together, and how he had changed his work schedule around, even to the point of giving up what he knew were some gravy contracts, just to have more time with her.
“Damn man, sounds like we're both a couple of lovesick fools,” Micah laughed before draining his mug. “You know you need to tell your sister, right?”
Adam nodded, his shoulders sagging with the realization there was no way to keep both of the women in his life happy. “Yeah, I know. If it were up to me, she’d already know. Between the two of us, I’m not so sure Jules is the only reason Carly doesn’t want to say anything.”
Micah turned his attention away from the game on TV. “What do you mean?”
“Think about it, isn’t it a bit odd that she’s that obsessed with Julia’s reaction? It’s not like they stayed tight after both of them ran off. I’m not sure what it is, but I can’t shake the feeling she’s not giving me the full story.” Adam signaled for another round from the bartender. “Let's just get through all this bullshit, and then I will tell her.”
Micah's eyes narrowed on Adam. “Yeah, sure you will. You always were a pussy when it came to telling Julia anything. Remember that time Charlie Webb stole one of her bras on a dare? I thought you were gonna piss yourself when you had to admit that you knew what happened. Then there was the time--”
“Shut up. I get what you're saying, but I'll tell her.”
“Don't wait too long, especially if this thing with Carly really is serious.”
Micah went to the bar to settle their tab, leaving Adam alone with his thoughts. As much as he cared about Carly, how long could they make a long distance relationship work? His boss was pressuring him to head out to the west coast to seal the deal on some major contracts, which meant he wasn't going to have the opportunity to see her very often. What would that do to them? It was the first time true doubt filled Adam's mind.
Chapter Ten
No matter how hard Adam tried, there was no way he could get out of his trip to California Monday morning. He tried using Julia's problems as a reason to postpone, but there was no way. One of the theaters he was visiting was on a tight schedule and wanted to make a decision that week on which company they would use to update their entire lighting system.
“I really hate that I have to leave tomorrow morning,” Adam huffed as he crawled into bed. It felt damn good having Carly next to him in his bed. He liked being in any bed next to her, but there was something about having her in his domain that eased his mind. When they were like this, it was easy to push the doubt to the side, at least for a little while.
Carly rolled onto her side, curling up against Adam with her leg draped over his. “Do you know when you'll be back to New York?” She asked quietly. When he looked down at her, he saw the concern filling her gorgeous green eyes.
Adam swallowed hard, knowing they had avoided this conversation. “I really don't. Harrison has me taking care of a bunch of things out in California this month and next, and I don't think I can get away with shoving them off on anyone else this time.”
Carly's already delicate frame seemed to deflate against his side. “This sucks, you know that?” Her voice was shaky, and Adam was certain he'd see tears welling in her eyes if he looked down again. At least he hoped he would, only because he didn't want to be the only one nearly brought to tears by the thought of not knowing when they'd see each other again. “Who's going to protect me from the big, bad alley monsters when I find another gig?”
One thing Adam loved about Carly was her ability to try to lighten the mood when things got too heavy. “Easy. Don't walk out into the alley alone and you won't have a problem. Now, what did I tell you about getting mopey around me?” This time, Adam wasn't worried about his ego taking a hit because she was depressed; he was more worried they'd wind up dragging each other under.
If this was to be their last night together, Adam didn't want to waste it talking about the what-ifs in life. He wanted to leave Carly with so many memories of him that they'd last until the next time they were together. “Come here, Peanut.”
Adam pulled Carly so that her slight frame was resting on top of him. Slowly, he reached for the bottom of her tank top, pulling it over her head so that they were skin-to-skin. He felt her breathing grow quick and shallow as she pulled herself up to kiss him. Her soft lips tenderly brushed against him. She seemed to want every moment of their time together to last just as much as he did.
Her porcelain skin felt soft under his lightly callused hands. His fingers slowly roamed their way down her sides, shifting slightly towards her front as he ran them back up until he was cupping her breasts in his hands. Adam never thought he'd wind up with a woman with a small chest, but he couldn't picture Carly with anything larger than her generous A-cups. They were delicate, just like the rest of her. Ever so slowly, Adam ran his thumb around her dusty pink nipples until they pebbled in his hands.
“Adam,” Carly moaned as he shifted one hand down into the waistband of her panties. Unlike other women he'd been with, Carly preferred cotton panties with ridiculous prints rather than sexy lace and satin. He loved knowing she didn't feel the need to sacrifice comfort and secretly enjoyed those moments when he got to see what pair she was wearing. “Baby, I need you.”
Adam slid his hand further between her legs, feeling how wet she was for him. While his thumb traced circles around her tender clit, he slipped two fingers deep inside of her. “Jesus, Carly...” He needed this woman more than he needed his next breath. He flipped her
over so his body hovered over hers, his fingers still working deep inside of her to find the soft spot he knew would make her come apart at his touch.
No matter how many times he felt it, Adam knew he'd never get used to the feeling of Carly's fingers wrapping around his hard shaft. “Damn, baby,” he gasped as she started stroking him slowly. “You keep that up, and I'm not sure how long I'll last.”
Carly smiled at him, her eyes hooded with desire. “I want more,” she pleaded, her hips arching to meet the thrusting of his hand. “Adam, I need you.”
That night, they made love slowly and tenderly, neither one of them willing to rush. When Adam felt himself getting close to the edge, he pulled back, drawing another orgasm out of Carly with his hands and mouth. The sun was beginning to peek over the horizon as they finally drifted off to sleep, both satisfied and smiling.
***
Carly rolled to her side as she hovered in that place between asleep and awake. She reached out for Adam, but felt nothing other than cold, soft cotton. He was gone. Even though she knew he was leaving, the realization that she slept through his departure stung. This was the first time she didn't get to kiss him goodbye before he left.
She pulled one of Adam's t-shirts out of the laundry pile, needing to feel close to him. She pulled the cotton to her face, taking in his scent as she walked through Adam's house. Without him here, the house was cold and cavernous. She couldn't figure out how he lived here, all alone, and didn't feel swallowed by the vast emptiness around him.
As she started the coffee pot, she noticed a note on the edge of the kitchen island.
Peanut,
I hope you're not mad that I didn't wake you up this morning. You looked so sweet laying there; I couldn't bring myself to wake you, knowing how hard it is for you to watch me leave. There's a key hanging on the hook by the door. I want you to have it. I know you're probably heading out to Gran's, but my home is your home whenever you need a place to go.
I'll give you a call when my plane lands.
A
PS. Can you do me a favor? Go out to lunch with Julia. I think it'll do both of you some good.
It didn't make goodbye any easier, but Carly couldn't be mad at Adam for letting her sleep. After two short nights and two incredibly stressful days, she had needed every minute of sleep she got. And he was right; she probably would have been in an even worse place if she'd had to watch him pulling out of the driveway.
Carly curled up on the couch watching morning talk shows with her cup of coffee. The house still felt too big and impersonal without Adam's presence, but with the sun streaming in through the wall of windows looking out over the country, Carly started to see its appeal. It scared her to think that she could see herself living in a place like this. Maybe even in this very home.
As talk shows turned into soap operas, Carly decided it was time to get on with her day. Without Adam here, there wasn't a good reason for her to stay. And if her friends knew she was still in Wisconsin but not in Brooklyn, they were going to start to ask questions. On her way to the shower, she sent a quick message to both Annie and Julia.
Carly: Wanna do lunch? I'm thinking Pedro's.
As she adjusted the water, her phone chimed with an incoming message.
Annie: Mugarita Monday. I'm in!
Leave it to Annie to be all in because of half-price mugs of margaritas. Maybe that was exactly what Carly needed, a day with her friends plus the company of Jose Cuervo. Her phone went off again as she dried herself. She didn't run to the phone, knowing it was too soon for her to hear from Adam, and realizing that it was probably Julia.
Julia: I was just going to suggest the same. God knows I need it after the morning I had.
From the sounds of it, all of the girls needed to get away for a good time. Too bad someone was going to have to stay sober enough to drive. Then again, they could always stumble their way over to the mall for some retail therapy if they weren't able to get behind the wheel right away.
***
By the time Carly got to the restaurant, her day had gone from bad to worse. Tatyana, her seldom-present roommate, had sent her a text message letting her know that she was going to be moving out. With a roommate, Carly was able to squeak by. Without a roommate and between jobs, there was no way Carly could make ends meet. With the harsh reality setting in that she had no clue how she was going to keep her place, Carly found herself near the bottom of her first mug by the time Annie and Julia arrived.
“Easy killer, it's not even noon yet,” Annie laughed, picking up the heavy mug off the bar. “Rough day?”
Had Carly been honest with her friends from the moment she touched down in Wisconsin, she could have leaned on them to help her get over the loneliness she felt. Instead, she had to bear that cross in silence. “Yeah, you could say that. My roommate is bailing out on me, and I don't have another show lined up right now. No show, no money. If something doesn't come in soon, I'm screwed.”
The good thing about life in the small town is even though they hadn't seen each other in years before the past weekend, it felt like no time had passed. Their friendship had an automatic ease that allowed them to pick up wherever life dropped them.
“That blows,” Annie stated, flagging down the bartender. “You gonna be the next kid to move home? Ask Julia; it isn't as awful as it seems here.”
Everyone knew that Carly and Julia were the two in their class who couldn't wait to get out of their one-horse town at the first available opportunity. “Don't bring me into this,” Julia laughed. “I have my own crap going on. The only thing I know for sure right now is that some things never change.” After their little talk the day before, Carly had the feeling Julia wasn't ecstatic to be back home. The look on her face as they headed into the dining room of their favorite Mexican restaurant cemented those feelings.
“I don't know; really, there's nothing for me here,” Carly said, shaking her head. Nothing besides Adam, that is. Carly wasn't comfortable talking to her friends about the thought of moving back to Wisconsin because she had thought about it. The problem was that she knew jobs in her field were few and far between here and she couldn't throw away four years of college for a man she'd been dating for less than two months. “So, Julia...you and Micah, huh? Are you back together or what?”
Apparently, that was the wrong question to ask to get the heat off Carly and her living arrangements. Julia proceeded to tell Carly and Annie about the eventful morning she and Micah had. Things had been going well with them, and they had been talking about starting over with their relationship, right up until Micah made a smart-ass comment welcoming Julia to parenthood when they were interrupted right as things between them started to heat up a bit. Carly could only imagine how terrifying that had to be for Julia. She was a delightful girl, but she took life too seriously most of the time. Add to that the fact that she was still trying to process Micah having a son as the result of cheating on her years earlier, and it was bound to push her over the edge.
All things considered, she was taking that particular comment fairly well. It was the fact that Caleb existed that Julia seemed to struggle with the most. She liked Caleb, and from the sounds of it, they actually got along fairly well. The problem was that Caleb had started opening up to Julia, making her worry she was being thrust into the position of replacement mom.
Carly took a sip of her strawberry margarita, knowing she needed to slow down if she had any hope of driving home later. “That's a tough one, Jules. You and Micah never were good at taking things slow. Maybe balls to the wall is just how you operate when you're together. That's not always a bad thing."
Their relationship had never been what Carly would consider normal. As teens, they acted like an old married couple. They were voted most likely to get married, not because they were that couple, but because Micah made it abundantly clear that he planned to marry her as soon as she turned eighteen. Unfortunately, he screwed that all up the night he slept with Karen. Now, they found themselves back in
each other's lives with all new complications.
Julia looked as if someone had slapped her across the face. "Yeah, but it's one thing when you're dating in school," she responded. "It's totally different now. He has a kid. A very moody, impressionable kid who's mom thoroughly screwed up. Not to mention the fact that Micah lied to me. He cheated on me. Do I just forget about all of that?"
Carly was never so happy about Annie's tendency to jump in with her opinion as she was at that moment. Having never been there and not having seen their interactions since Julia got back to town, Carly wasn't quite sure what to say.
"No, you don't forget. But you do need to remember that you were both young and incredibly stupid when that happened. He did a lot of growing up while you were gone. You both have life experiences you didn't have then." The way Annie said it made it sound like an easy decision. Being in her own tangled web with Adam, Carly knew there was no such thing when it came to matters of the heart.
By the time the ladies paid their bill, Julia seemed to have calmed down a bit, but it was obvious the situation still bothered her. “Hey, Jules,” Carly said, running after her in the parking lot. “If you need to talk, I think I'm going to hang out at Gran's for a few more days. Give me a call and we'll go out.”
Carly made one of those spur-of-the-moment decisions only able because she was out of work. For the first time in a long time, there was nothing waiting for Carly in New York and everything she needed right here in their small town.
