Weeping Violet

by D W Marshall

  “By yourself?”

  I can see the worry in her posture. Her spine is rigid and she leans toward me as if she is going to scoop me up and lock me away.

  My eyes want to roll but I stop them. I can’t blame her for worrying. “I have personal security. Remember?”

  She sighs in relief and visibly relaxes. “Yes. Yes. How does that work exactly?” She looks around. “I don’t see any security here.”

  “I call before I leave the house, they come. Well, he comes. David is his name. He’s tall, blond, and handsome with muscles and skills.” I do a comical punch and block combination.

  “Thank the stars for Taron. He has always been such a darling young man. No offense to Logan, but I always thought he’d be a great man for you. The two of you have always shared such an easy relationship.” She scoops up our bowls.

  “Kinda hard when I already have a boyfriend, Mom.” I was crushing on Taron a couple of years ago, but I stopped when it was clear that he saw me as more of a sister than a potential girlfriend.

  “I know.” She swats the thought away. “We’re just having girl chat. Logan is a sweetheart. He’s not exactly who I saw for you, but what do I know? As long as you’re happy, and he is good to you, I support who you love. After all that you’ve been through I just want you to be happy.”

  “Logan makes me happy, or at least he did before I was taken. But I think he will again.”

  “Maybe he will want to drive you to school today? Two protectors is always better than one,” she says.

  “I didn’t even think about asking him. Good idea.” I think of his check in my purse. Today is the perfect time to off-load it. Of course, I have no idea if he will take it. Mom, Taron, and Tabitha were easy. Could I get lucky a fourth time?

  “Great, then, it’s settled.”

  I don’t tell her what I’m thinking—that all of this escorting me around is just a short-term arrangement. Mason controlled me for an entire year; he doesn’t get to control me anymore. I had a life before The Chamber and I want to get back to it as soon as possible.

  I send a quick group text to Taron and David, alerting them of my planned outing. Then I call Logan and ask him to accompany me.

  Logan is at my doorstep an hour later. I hug Mom goodbye and walk toward the curb. David is standing next to a black BMW with tinted windows. He’s hardly being low-key, but security is commonplace in Los Angeles. He looks more official than he did yesterday, in a slim fitted, black suit. He has an earpiece in his right ear. His demeanor is serious and all-business.

  Always the gentleman, Logan opens the passenger door to his car for me, but I don’t get in. Instead I hover on the sidewalk and gesture for David to come over.

  “Logan, this is David. David, this is my boyfriend, Logan.” I take one look at Logan and I can see that he’s confused. In his defense, I haven’t exactly told him about my new security detail. It only happened yesterday and he was on a location shoot, so we didn’t have a chance to talk about the new developments in my life.

  The two of them shake hands, while I explain.

  “David is my bodyguard. He works with Taron, who thinks that I should have someone with me whenever I leave the house, just in case the guy who took me resurfaces. He also hired security for Tabitha.”

  “Miss, please slip this onto your phone.” I take a small box from David and reach into my purse.

  David holds up his hand. “Not out here. Do it once you get into the car. It’s a phone case with a built-in tracker. Take this, also.” He hands me a black bag. “Inside you will find some items that will replace some of your personal items. I will explain once we’re on the move.”

  I take the spy bag and offer him a tight smile.

  Logan’s expression is guarded as he looks back and forth between us. He swallows hard. He mumbles something to David, shakes his hand again and helps me into his front seat. I wave to David before getting inside.

  I notice that he doesn’t touch me. Usually he takes my hand into his, or places his hand on the small of my back when he opens the door for me. It could be nothing, but somehow I don’t think so. Suddenly my purse weighs a ton, and his check is a boulder at the bottom of it.

  “So, where to?” he asks, but his voice is tight and clipped.

  I do my best to ignore his foul mood. “I was thinking we could ride up to my school.”

  “Vine and Yucca it is, then.”

  Logan regards me and I can’t read his expression. His blue eyes show love and caution simultaneously.

  “I can take you wherever you need to go. You can call Taron and tell him that we don’t need Blondie back there,” he adds.

  I whip my head around and sure enough, David is right behind us.

  “You have a job. I don’t expect you to blow that off to babysit me.”

  “Brinley, Blondie isn’t the only one who can protect you. Personally, I want to put a locater chip under your skin. You are not the only one having nightmares. I’m pretty sure I’ve aged five years in the year you were gone.”

  “Why do you keep calling him Blondie? You know, I have blonde hair, too.” I try not to laugh. “He’s only here to help. He’s got military training, you know.”

  “I’m sorry. How about I call him ‘Man in Black?’”

  “Um, I don’t think he’ll like that one bit.” I put my hand on top of his.

  “I can tell you right now that I would not like it,” David’s voice emulates from the black bag on my lap. Logan and I stare down at the bag and laugh quietly. I’d forgotten all about the bag full of spy gadgets that I was holding.

  He’d heard everything that we said. Good thing it wasn’t anything too bad. I open the bag and search for the listening device. There is a printed inventory list with instructions for each of the items. First, I see non-prescription glasses with transition lenses that allow David to hear and see whatever I do. There is the phone case with the built in tracker, and a bracelet and decorative finger rings that also have trackers. The jade green jewel on the bracelet is a silent panic button that will broadcast an alert to David. The printed note also says that if I were to be taken, again, it is doubtful that the kidnapper would make me remove every tracker.

  I begin sliding my phone case off and replace it with the new one.

  “So, my girlfriend and I will have no privacy?” Logan asks loudly.

  “Negative, sir. If you desire privacy, there is a kill switch on the glasses that silences them. Though, I don’t suggest that while Brinley is out of the house.”

  When we pull up to a red light, Logan reaches for the glasses. He searches for the off, flips it off, and returns them to my lap.

  I open my mouth to protest and decide against it.

  The mood in the car is heavy.

  “We don’t need him. I’ve got you, Brinley.”

  I sigh and pick up his hand. “I know you do, but this is better. You can work and be free to live your life without worrying about me all the time. I trust Taron, Logan. Let him do his job. This isn’t forever.”

  He lets go of my hand.

  “Yeah, I’m sure he’s just ‘doing his job.’”

  The air cools between us. Logan always thought that Taron was into me. I’ve told him a million times that Taron is like the big brother I never had. We’ve grown up together. Well, sort of. He’s five years older than Tabitha and I, but he has always been there for us. Any feelings that he has for me are platonic, at best.

  “Can we not go there? I haven’t even gotten used to being home yet, but if he can spare the extra guys to keep me safe, then I am grateful, and you should be, too. He isn’t even the one guarding me.”

  He relaxes and picks my hand back up to kiss it. “Sorry. I don’t know what my problem is. Forgive me?”

  I nod. I’m unable to speak because the warmth and wetness of his kiss causes tingling on my hand that travels to an ache deep in my belly. Logan touching me feels so different now that I am more experienced with what a simple touch can le
ad to. I glance over with my more experienced eyes and take in his broad shoulders and muscled chest showing through his cotton tee. He takes tall, dark and handsome to a whole new level. I have the sudden urge to undo my seatbelt and climb over to straddle him and show him what we’ve been missing. We’ve been together nearly two years and I have never seen his entire body. The furthest we’ve ever explored is kissing with his shirt off and mine on. We’ve been denying ourselves. Where his body is concerned, I am only left to imagine, and after my recent sexual exposure at The Chamber, I can imagine just about everything.

  Brinley, get your mind out of the gutter.

  I can’t, though. In my mind he has an amazing cock and I am sitting on it right now, grinding the both of us into ecstasy.

  “Why are you smiling like that?” Logan asks me, totally interrupting my sex daydream. “Why are you blushing?”

  Busted. I sit up straight in my seat with my entire body buzzing. I can feel the heat in my cheeks. My sex is hot. Squeezing my thighs tight will not put out this fire. “I’m just soaking up the sun. I missed it so much, being locked inside. It’s almost orgasmic.”

  Logan must find that funny because he laughs out loud. “I’ve never heard it put quite like that, but the California sun makes me happy, too. It’s just good to see you smiling. I love that blush on your cheeks.”

  Now I’m embarrassed. If he only knew the source of the color in my cheeks has everything to do with him and what I want to do to him.

  “Don’t be shy, babe. You’re beautiful.” He kisses my hand again.

  Wow. Now I’m the horny one who wants to get into his pants. What a reversal. There is no way I can turn off the hormones that The Chamber awakened. I’m only human, and after a year of my body being used as a pleasure vessel, I can’t help but to want some of those feelings back. I know how amazing it could be with someone I actually love.

  It is so strange. In so many ways, things feel almost normal, as if the last year never happened. But in other ways, I feel like a complete foreigner in my world…in my own body, even. I wonder how my sisters are doing. If I know that they are surviving, then maybe I will be more confident that I can, too. Flame is in Las Vegas, only a four-hour drive away. Maybe Logan and I can pay her a visit.

  After a year of only seeing stone walls, being outside is everything. Even the smoggy sky is inviting. Like Logan said, nothing beats the California sun. The zipping of cars in traffic is welcoming. I roll the window down in Logan’s car, because for the first time ever, I don’t care about the wind whipping through my hair. I stare out, resisting the urge to stick my head out of the window like a dog. The wind on my face and tearing through my hair feels like life. I watch the Los Angeles hustle and bustle—pedestrians going about their business—with awe. They all look so free, and I wonder where I fit in. Am I free? It only takes one look at the sleek black sedan trailing close behind us to realize I’m not…yet.

  “You okay over there?” Logan asks.

  I feel a gentle squeeze to my hand. “Just thinking,” I say, not taking my eyes from the window.

  “Care to share?” Logan asks.

  I turn my eyes to look at Logan for a quick second, and return them back to the window. “I was just wondering if I will ever feel free again.”

  “Babe. You are stronger than you think you are, and you will get there. You just need to give yourself some time. You’ve been home a whopping two days.”

  I let myself laugh at that. Logan is right. I just got home.

  When we pull up to the guard at school, I feel the urge to duck my head. I recognize Belinda right away. I turn my head to gaze out of the window. I’m not ready to greet her curious eyes.

  Logan takes a cue from me. “Hi. We’re here to meet with admissions.”

  Belinda hands Logan a parking pass. “Do you know where you’re going?”

  “Sure do. The gentleman in the car behind us is with us. Security.” Logan says, placing the pass in the window. “Thanks,” Logan adds and begins driving. He finds a close spot in the shade. I haven’t changed my position.

  He switches off the car and turns to me. “Are you sure about this? We can come back another time, babe.”

  “I just need a minute,” I say to him, wiping away the trickle of tears that sneak past my eyes. Perhaps I do need more time. I couldn’t even face Belinda. What makes me think I can face my teachers? Or worse, my friends?

  Logan wraps his arms around me and pulls me close to him. He smells like home—fresh and outdoorsy. His arms are strong and comforting. I know I will always be safe in his arms.

  “Okay, I’m ready.”

  Logan climbs out of the car and comes to open the door for me. This time he doesn’t hesitate. He protectively wraps his arm around me. “You let me know the second it gets to be too much, and we are out of here, okay?” he asks.

  I nod. I trust him.

  David climbs out of his car and hangs back. To anyone watching, he isn’t with us and arrived shortly after us. We head toward the main building, and I don’t have to look back to know that he is behind us. I switch the glasses on, slide them onto my face and glance down at the rings and bracelet on my arm. One push and the cavalry would come.

  I catch sight of Belinda in the security cage, and I wave to her this time. I feel safe behind the darkened lenses of my glasses. She waves back with a big smile, but she doesn’t venture out. I have always liked Belinda. She has been like a second mom or an aunt to most of us. She’s not that big—she’s five-one, at best—but for some reason, people naturally fear her. When it’s necessary, she lets them.

  I appreciate her not running out of the booth to accost me.

  We don’t bump into anyone I know on the way. When we walk into the admissions office, Mrs. Walton looks at me as though she’s seen a ghost. Maybe a warning phone call would have been a good idea.

  She’s on the phone, but appears unable to speak. “Let me call you back. I have someone in my office that I must speak with.” She hangs up much too quickly to have given the person an opportunity to respond. “My dear,” she gasps. “Brinley?” She rushes over to hug me.

  I hug her back with one arm because Logan refuses to let me go. The most awkward hug ever.

  “Let me look at you!” She steps back and studies me, then hugs me to her again. “Please take a seat.” She gestures to the small sofa across from her desk.

  I don’t miss that she’s wiping her eyes as she walks back to her desk. She hasn’t changed much. She still wears her hair cut short and spiky. Although the blue color choice is much bolder than I have seen in the past. She looks thinner, too. I have never been able to guess her age because she is so fashion-forward and daring. I’m sure that knocks off some years.

  Logan and I sit on the small sofa. His arm is still wrapped around me. “I guess I should start with stating the obvious… I’m not dead.” I give her a brittle smile. Logan tightens his grip around me for a second. It’s just what I need.

  Mrs. Walton listens. Her green eyes are glistening.

  “The day that I went missing, I left campus for a morning run and three men abducted me. They took me right off the street in broad daylight. The next thing I knew, I was on a plane. A year later, my captors released me.”

  “Dear god, Brinley. Where did they take you? Do the police know you are back?”

  Logan puts his hand up to interrupt her. “Listen, Brinley has been through too much to fathom. She has already spoken to the police. Right now, rather than relive the horror, she really wants to move forward and get back to her life.”

  “I completely understand.”

  Thank the heavens for Logan. “I am here to see about taking some classes this summer. I’d like to know if I can pick up where I left off.”

  “Absolutely, Brinley.” She fumbles about. She wakes up her computer and begins typing away. After a few minutes she looks up at me. “Okay.” She smiles at me. “You are active in the system again. All you need to do is register for your cl
asses.”

  “Just like that? I was expecting more red tape.”

  “For you, after all that you have been through, I cut right through that tape.”

  “Thank you, Mrs. Walton.” Maybe getting back to normal will be easier than I thought.

  “Will you be returning to the dorms? Because that may take slightly more effort,” Ms. Walton tells me.

  “No,” Logan and I blurt out at the same time.

  Mrs. Walton raises an eyebrow at us. “Well, then. Here is our most recent catalog. It’s also available online, but you know me, I like my paper. And…” She looks around. “Ah ha! This is something new we’re trying.” She hands me more paper. “We included a bio on all the instructors, so the students really get to know the training and experience the instructors bring to the table.”

  “Thanks,” I say to her, and we all stand as if on cue.

  “I should be thanking you. Seeing you today has lightened my heart.”

  All I can do is smile. We walk out. I am relieved that we don’t run into anyone I know on the way to the car. I think a warning phone call to my school friends is in order. Besides, I think I have had enough fun for one day.

  “You wanna grab lunch?” Logan asks me when we get into the car.

  “Can we get it to go and eat it at the house?”

  “Absolutely. Or we can eat at my new place.”

  “Wow. You really are a grown up now. I would love to check out your place.”

  We run through a drive-through for burgers and fries, then head to Logan’s apartment.

  Going back to my school wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be, but I am not looking forward to any more reunions. If only I could take Logan with me everywhere so he could ward off all the questions. My friend Demi… A little bit of information will never do for her. Oh, and Maddie, my old roommate. Seeing her will be much too difficult. She is the most sensitive and emotional person I have ever met.

  Logan’s place is fancier than I expect it to be. In his first year out of college, he’s found a swanky loft space in Century City. There is even a doorman. He opens the door when we arrive, and Logan thanks him, takes my hand, and leads me through the entrance. The lobby is chic and reminds me of a boutique hotel. Flowers and plants make the space feel warm and cozy. The receptionist nods in our direction. She is a beautiful, tall redhead. I bet she works here to pay her bills until her modeling or acting career takes off. I follow Logan onto the open elevator. He squeezes my hand and I can feel the excitement bouncing off of him. He places a key in the button numbered fourteen, the elevator door closes, and we begin to ascend.