Hadrian's Lover

by Patricia-Marie Budd

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  Salve!

  The Twenty-Fifth Anniversary of the Terror Attack

  HNN—Melissa Eagleton Reporting

  It was twenty-five years ago today that a group of well-organized Christian extremists broke through Hadrian’s southwest wall. Although well-fortified, those fanatics somehow managed to gain entrance. It is believed one of our soldiers was in collusion with the enemy. Although Corporal Victor Williams was also killed during the attack, it was from his watchtower that the invaders should have been detected. Williams’ family, though, ardently defends him, claiming the young man was a patriot and not, as many suspect, a heterosexual sympathizer. Even so, a number of Williams’ peers were concerned about his sexual preference. Williams did not date, and a few female soldiers claimed he was creepy. “His eyes follow you everywhere,” one female soldier had said in a complaint registered to a senior officer. No formal action was ever taken against Private Williams, though, as no tangible evidence regarding heterosexual tendencies was ever produced.

  If Williams were a traitor, he allowed over fifty heterosexual barbarians inside our wall to murder all the soldiers of his compound. Of the fifteen men and eighteen women stationed at the southwest gate that day, all but one died. All the male soldiers were shot, and those women who survived the initial attack were brutally raped and murdered. Footage of the event was found on the body of a dead enemy renegade. These evil brutal animals filmed most of their atrocities, leaving behind a tape that was spine-chilling to say the very least. The torture and raping of the eight surviving female soldiers was cruelty beyond belief.

  One soldier survived this brutal attack: Captain Tanya Weller. Before being killed, Corporal Regan Hillier managed to get a message over the wave asking for reinforcements. By the time two heavily armed battalions arrived, though, everyone but Sergeant Weller had been murdered. The heterosexual barbarians were in the process of brutally raping the poor woman while others stood by filming the event. What kind of sick people would film such atrocities? What sort of sick pleasure were they hoping to gain from watching themselves murder, torture, and rape others? Did they actually believe such a film was for posterity?

  Even though Sergeant Weller’s life was saved, her mind was completely destroyed by the attack. She had to be institutionalized and placed under twenty-four hour watch. She still managed to commit numerous acts of self-mutilation, and eventually, she was successful at taking her own life. Her suicide, as well as the attack against her compatriots, is a bitter reminder of how the outside world views Hadrian’s citizens. We must never forget that the ultimate intention of the heterosexual world is to destroy us.

  Evidence of the world’s hatred is clearly shown in the attack scenes filmed by the attackers. The images seen on this tape are so graphic it was decided not to publicize them; rather, we leave the viewing of them to the discretion of the individual and parents. Anyone needing to be reminded of the violent and brutal nature of heterosexual hordes can access this video, simply titled Terrorists at the Wall, over the wave. One viewing of this horrific event is evidence enough to explain why so many citizens of Hadrian shrink with fear at the thought of the outside world breaking through our walls. Extreme religion rules the outside world, and we have been branded as sinners due to our sexual orientation. There is also extreme jealousy that we alone are able to control population and live within a self-sustainable community. The outside world is battering against our walls, desperate to get in, anxious to destroy us and take what we have worked long and hard to create and to preserve.

  Hadrian’s military will not allow that to happen. The men and women in our service are dedicated to preserving our freedom and saving what little livable earth there is left. We will not allow the heterosexual barbarians, their unnatural hordes, ever to destroy the last vestige of life left on this planet!

  Vale!

  Gideon’s Obsession

  Every night after supper, since Todd Middleton’s arrival at his camp, Gideon Weller retreats to his office to be alone. He falls into this routine every time a rapist enters his compound. While the wards are kept busy watching images of the outside world, Gideon Weller sits behind his desk, dims the lights, and with the blink of an eye, turns on the small, nearly invisible screen that pops up in front of his vision. Once again, he relives the horror of his mother’s rape. He never uses the wall screen for this in case anyone should walk in.

  Leaning back now in his large cushioned, swivel office chair, his hand fumbles for his pants zipper. His mind balks, fights against his bodily urges, but they always prove too much for him. Tears stream as he watches four men grab his mother’s limbs, pulling her in four opposite directions. The film is grainy as a result of the government having to convert the stream from outside technology to make it compatible with Hadrian’s voc wave. After so many viewings, though, Gideon’s eyes have adjusted so he doesn’t notice the distortions anymore. A fifth man enters the screen. He uses a bowie knife to tear open Gideon’s mother’s uniform. The man doesn’t even bother to strip her fully, only cutting away enough of the fabric to expose her breasts and pubic area. The fifth man steps back and swirls his index finger. The cameraman cackles as the four men holding onto Gideon’s mother take their cues. It is grotesque to watch as they pull her in four directions and then spin her, even bounce her up and down, as if this were some children’s game. The camera bounces and jerks along with its handler’s laughter. Gideon begins to feel nauseous. Ironically, this feeling only adds to the sensations he is creating, sickening both his sense of self and his hatred for all heterosexual men. The men torturing his mother laugh as she screams in terror. Suddenly, the spinning stops and the fifth man, retrieving his penis, begins rubbing it hard. Gideon, too, rubs harder. When ready, the fifth man grabs Gideon’s mother’s buttocks in preparation for the thrust. His first attempt fails, to the delight of the cameraman, who once again jars the image as he laughs uproariously. The rapist yells at his companions to hold her tighter. Forcing his eyes wide open, Gideon watches as the four men each take a step back and then lean to hold her body taut. Gideon swears he can hear his mother’s tendons rip. The rapist’s pelvis begins its thrust motion. Gideon’s pelvis moves in tandem. A sixth man enters. He yanks his mother’s head back and down, forcing her mouth open, and begins to fuck her face. Her body convulses as she chokes clearly, giving the fifth man shivering sensations. Gideon, too, chokes. Oh, mother, forgive me! The image is too much for him. He blinks it off. I am not one of them, he chants to himself. Softening, alone in the dark, he blinks to retrieve the image. He needs the provocation. The four men holding Gideon’s mother shout obscenities along with the cameraman. After both men come, they drop her on the ground and a cascade of urine waterfalls on her face while one man chooses instead to defecate. For this final act of degradation, her mouth is forced open to receive his “special” gift. Gideon’s body is shaking, his head thrown back, his chest arched, his eyes raked with tears.

  It is not his mother’s rape to which he is masturbating. It is the image he has created in his own mind, his raping the men who brutalized her. The impossibility of this act is lost on Gideon at times like this. Even though all those men are long dead, it is not their faces he sees, but the face of the current rapist living inside his compound. It is Todd Middleton’s face he envisions. It is Todd Middleton he watches raping and torturing his mother. It is Todd Middleton he aggressively beats and rapes in his own mind. The more violently they torture his mother, the more violently he tortures Middleton until finally, when the first bullet from the reinforcements blows off the head of the man defecating into his mother’s mouth (the head of Todd Middleton), Gideon Weller collapses, moaning piteously. Slowly, his eyes close and the horrific image vanishes. Always, without thought, he uses his wet, sticky hand to wipe away the tears. After covering himself with his disgrace, he screams inside his head, Those Fucking Heterosexual Bastards! I am not one of them! I am not one of them!

  What few people know i
s that Gideon Weller had once, like Todd Middleton, been caught masturbating to straight porn. His mothers had, after a long discussion with him, decided the best course of action for him was to be reeducated at home. Gideon agreed. Being admitted to a government reeducation camp would have closed off too many doors for his future. As Gideon was scholarship material and destined for uni, he could not afford having a heterosexual stain on his record. From that time forth, he has dedicated himself to finding the latent homosexual within, but the need to eradicate everything heterosexual only came after his mother’s brutal rape. The one, and only, time he had visited her in the institution, she had recognized him, but she only saw before her the heterosexual masturbator. She beat him, berated him, cursed him, and called him every ugly name she could muster. She even spat in his face. His whole life since has been dedicated to proving to himself that he is not straight. And, even though he has never formed this need for validation as a conscious thought, he is determined to make all straight men pay for what those murderous marauders did to his mother.

  * * * * *

  Salve!

  The Reeducated

  HNN—Melissa Eagleton Reporting

  Are we prejudiced against the reeducated? Few people would ever admit to holding animosity toward those of us who have required government assistance when dealing with sexual confusion. Our youth, who have been found acting on heterosexual tendencies and have experienced reeducation, reenter our society fully rehabilitated. One would assume that these individuals can return to life as normal, but there are a few occupations for which these individuals no longer qualify. To begin with, no woman after reeducation has ever been allowed to become a surrogate goddess. Our government’s rationale is to avoid further contamination of heterosexual genes into Hadrian’s gene pool. This makes perfect sense. If those individuals in reeducation have stronger heterosexual tendencies than the rest of us, it is only reasonable not to contaminate our future children’s genes. The surrogate goddess not only provides the womb for our men’s fetuses to grow in, but they also provide the eggs. Although sensible not to allow a reeducated woman to become a surrogate goddess, one does have to question why no reeducated man or woman is allowed to enter Hadrian’s military, especially at a time when citizens are being asked to reenlist after their four-year tour of duty is over. Why then are the reeducated banned from active military duty?

  Angelo Martin, age nineteen, recently applied for and was refused active duty in Hadrian’s military on the basis that he had spent eight months in reeducation at the Southwest Reeducation Camp. “I really think it’s unfair that even after reeducation, we should be discriminated against. I made a mistake. I know that now. I’ve been reeducated, and in two years, I will swear an oath of fidelity to Hadrian and our chosen way of life. I love my country, my family, my friends, and my planet as much as any other Hadrian citizen! I want a share in being responsible for our people’s protection. It’s ironic really. Those of us who have been reeducated are no longer a threat. We’ve come to accept Hadrian’s lifestyle and fully understand its merits. We want to defend our country, too. I know I would be a good soldier if only my country would let me.”

  Lieutenant-General Birtwistle justifies the army’s refusal to allow the reeducated to serve. “We simply cannot risk having anyone who is likely to harbor sympathy for the enemy defending our wall. Just the idea that one of our own could betray us is enough to keep the reeducated off our recruitment list.” When asked for evidence of someone with strong heterosexual tendencies actually aiding and abetting the enemy, reference was made to the brutal terror attack on the Southwest Gate over twenty-five years ago. Although Lieutenant-General Birtwistle admits no hard evidence was ever found against Corporal Victor Williams, many in the military still believe he was the one who helped the heterosexual barbarians to break through our wall. As always, it is important to note that the young corporal was exonerated posthumously of all charges. Yet, even just the suspicion that one of our own might well have been swayed to help outsiders based on similar sympathies is enough to bar the door of military service to those citizens who have been reeducated.

  Many professions in the areas of medicine, research, and education are also out of reach to the reeducated. I recently learned that our unis deny entrance to anyone who has a reeducation record. This situation is most unfortunate because some of these youth had great careers ahead of them. We most recently lost Todd Middleton to reeducation. You may remember him as the young b-ball star of Pride High’s Panthers. He had been offered an early entrance scholarship to Antinous Uni, but that offer was revoked as soon as he was exposed and sent to the Northeast Camp for reeducation. He had even mentioned in an interview with me not too long ago about his wanting to become a bioengineer like his father. His dream had been to alter rice genetically so it would grow in our northern climate. Unfortunately, we will now never know if he could have been successful.

  Even with these avenues closed, there are many jobs still open to the reeducated. Many of these men and women, having fallen in love with and married their wards, choose to become stay-at-home spouses. Others go on to work in the trades. As well, the service industry is always hiring, and one does not have to disclose a history of reeducation in any of these jobs. Every job in Hadrian is important, from bioengineering right down to waste disposal. Those, in fact, who work in waste disposal are among the most important citizens in this day and age. It may not be a pretty job, but it is critical if we are to avoid future pollutants damaging our environment.

  So don’t despair. There is a world of work opportunities awaiting the reeducated. Hadrian loves you. And Hadrian still needs you. You have been welcomed back into the fold. Embrace your new life with joy and energy.

  Vale!

  Quelling Dissension

  “Enough of this,” Gideon mutters as he reaches across his desk for a handful of tissue. After wiping his hand and face, Gideon Weller resumes his authoritative bearing. Sitting upright, he zips up his pants before flicking on his reading lamp. Blinking his left eye, he begins peering over the file he keeps open at all times. What he reads brings a sneer to his lips. Todd Middleton has proven to be just as unruly as Gideon Weller had hoped. He is fully aware of the unspoken charge against Tabatha. No man should ever be allowed to get away with rape. It never ceases to amaze him that some women haven’t the heart to accuse the man, as is their right. Knowing firsthand how rape can tear a woman apart, Mr. Weller sees it as his personal mission never to allow a rapist ever to reenter Hadrian society, for once a man has raped a woman, he will commit the act again and again until he has damned all of Hadrian to a living hell. Every time a rapist comes into his camp, he finds himself compelled to watch his mother’s horror over and over, witnessing again and again her bloody and bruised body, her heart-wrenching screams of agony. And then come the memories of her institutionalized life with the rending of hair, the self-mutilations that eventually led to the end of her life.

  Gideon Weller has never forgotten the horror of his one visit to his mother after she was institutionalized. Not having seen her since the attack, Gideon was unprepared for how the violence had demented her. The nurse on duty the day of Gideon’s visit had tried to warn him. “Your mother is very unstable, Mr. Weller. I do not recommend you visit her. If you wish, I can turn her window on so we can see inside her room.” Instinctively, he blinked the window light on, revealing a woman with unkempt hair, muttering and pacing.

  Gideon, repulsed by the idea of staring at his mother like an animal in the zoo, demanded, “Turn that off! My mother is not a gorilla!”

  Having forgotten whom he was addressing at the moment, the young man protested, “No, she is more like a Tasmanian Devil.” Noting the look of horror on Gideon Weller’s face, the young nurse apologized, “I am sorry to speak so cruelly about your mother but that is the way it is. She is dangerous.” Although Captain Tanya Weller was a short, slightly plump, unassuming woman, her face had that rounded, pointed look of the small devil
, not to mention the sharp incisors. “She will lunge at you as soon as you walk through that door. She will dig her teeth into you, and more often than not, she aims for the throat.” As a reflex, the young man rubs the side of his neck, caressing the scar. “Thank Hadrian she never bit into the vein,” the young nurse muttered to himself.

  “I insist you shut off that window and let me in to see my mother,” Gideon demanded.

  The young man merely shook his head. “That would be unwise. Right now, she appears unresponsive, but the very moment you walk through that door, she will lash out at you, certain you are one of the rapists.”

  “But she’ll know me,” Gideon insisted. “I’m her son.”

  Still doubtful, the young man held off unlocking Tanya Weller’s door. “We usually only allow women in there. The last male nurse who went in there, well,” he said, again rubbing at the scar on his neck, “she left some mighty nasty scars on his face.” He shuddered as he spoke. “Nearly tore out one of his eyeballs. Left him blind on the left side.”

  “She’s my mother,” Gideon persisted. “She would never hurt me.”

  “You are a man!” The nurse’s eyes opened wide in emphasis. “She always hurts men.”

  “I am her son!” Although Gideon’s confidence had been shaken, he was determined to see his mother. “I’m family!”

  “Oh, sweetie,” the young man lamented. “You have no idea what your mother’s been through, do you?”

  “I know she was brutally beaten and raped.” Gideon had been close to shouting by that point. He had been kept away from his mother for too long. His Mama Rena had repeatedly dissuaded him from making the trip and successfully kept him away for over a month. “Honey,” Mama Rena had tried to reason softly, “your mother is not responding well to men.” Gideon refused to believe his own mother would reject him. “But, baby,” Mama Rena had pleaded, “she’s not the same woman she was before the attack.” But nothing Mama Rena said had deterred Gideon from visiting his mother.