Obsession: Loving an Alpha Male

by S. K. Lessly

  The atmosphere, I loved tremendously. It was always packed with a huge diverse crowd who loved to drink, laugh, smoke and most of all they loved to tip; well, most of them did. The jukebox was always playing, and the crowd was always entertaining. When I wasn’t here at Finn’s, I was at my other money making job, waitressing or being a hostess at one of the pristine restaurants, LeMont, on Mt. Washington.

  The next night, which was a Friday, was typically my day off from both jobs, but I knew Joy already knew that. Joy Maize worked with me at both places and had become a really good friend of mine. I met her while apartment hunting two years ago at the current building I’m living in. At the time, she lived across the hall from me, and I swear we hit it off instantly.

  She was my saving grace sometimes when I just wanted to forget it all and go home. Joy was around five feet, five inches tall with black shoulder length hair, fair skin and brown eyes. She had a slight curve to her body, but she was solid muscle with a body that any girl would die for. She worked out all the time, and in her spare time taught self–defense classes. When I told her a little bit of what I was running away from, she never judged me. Instead, she made sure I would never, ever repeat my past.

  I waited for her to fill my bar order. She was working the bar tonight instead of waitressing, and we were busy as always.

  “You know I’m not working tomorrow. Why are you asking?”

  She smiled and looked at me pleadingly. “Brian finally asked me out yesterday, but I have to work at LeMont.”

  “And?” I said to her, in response.

  “And Friday night is the only time he’s free for a few days. Sooo… I need you to work for me.” When I started to shake my head, she begged. “Come on, please, hon? You know I’ve been waiting for him to ask me out for like ever.”

  Brian was a guy she met at the gym she belongs to and drags me to most days. I have to say, Brian was handsome in a muscle bound kind of way. He was very tall and muscular, like everywhere. I think Joy said he used to body build for a while, but now he’s a trainer at the gym, as well as a personal trainer for some of the city athletes.

  I pouted. “I know you have, but it’s like my only full day off this week.”

  I knew I was going to work for her, but I just wanted to play with her a little.

  Joy leaned into me so she could talk over the music. “I know, and I promise to make it up to you. I can switch with you anytime next week to give you a break. Please help me out?”

  “Can you stop begging and get back to work?” Milo Anderson, our boss, barked at us.

  Joy rolled her eyes and went back to the other side of the bar to take more orders. I gave it thirty minutes before I put her out of her misery.

  When I walked past her and whispered, “Yes,” she squealed and hugged me tight. I really didn’t mind doing the extra days. As a matter of fact, I really needed the extra money. I mean, tips were good here at the bar, but working at LeMont for private parties was sometimes better.

  LeMont was the only five–diamond ranked restaurant in the Pittsburgh area, and they prided themselves on impeccable service, especially since I worked there. The food was amazing, of course, with a wide variety to choose from. The restaurant was nestled on top of Mt. Washington and gave you a beautiful view of downtown Pittsburgh. There are a variety of restaurants along what is called Restaurant Row, but in my opinion, LeMont was the best. Again, I am kind of bias.

  The next day I cleaned my apartment, went shopping at the grocery store and took a nap to get ready for the extra hours. When I got to the restaurant, it was packed as usual. As I mentioned before, I usually work the private parties or greet people as they come in. Tonight, I was the hostess as well as anything they needed me to be. My boss, Mr. Red, or Mr. Creepy, which is what we call him behind his back, really worked the heck out of me.

  Mr. Red was just that; I swear every time you saw him, his face and hands were red. He was a short man with a slight belly on him and a smile that was plastered on his face for every customer that walked in. He had beady eyes that were dark, creepy brown with short straight brown hair.

  All the women that work here and under him thought he was a creep. He made it no secret when he looked you up and down, practically drooling before he spoke to you. He seemed to always be sweating and always had this look in his eyes that made you wonder what he was thinking when he looked at you. I tell you something, it can’t be good. I could feel it.

  When my night was finally over, it was going on 1 a.m., and I was exhausted. Just thinking about working at Sara’s in the morning was making me feel even more tired and sleepy. The money I made on tips made up for me being tired, but I still wished I was in the bed right about then.

  I didn’t feel like waiting for the bus, so when I cashed out for the night, I called a cab to take me home and waited outside until it got there.

  I sighed deeply as I looked out at this beautiful city and its lights. I couldn’t believe I was here. My life was awful growing up, but for some idiotic reason I never made the moves to leave. I don’t know why, but once I became of age, I stayed around the Spawn, my father, most times just hoping he would start to love me. I may be book smart, but now I can admit that back then common sense was as foreign to me as unconditional love.

  But I made it… And I couldn’t believe that I was still here. My life finally felt like it belonged to me. I’m finally living for myself instead of for someone else. I won’t forget the reason why I’m running and why I won’t go home, but for the first time in forever, I could breathe.

  My mind suddenly switched to the male perfection that I met a week ago. He’s come into Sara’s ever since that day at the track, and every day he comes right up to me and talks to me. I mean, I try to act normal when he does this, but the back of my mind keeps wondering why a guy like him wanted to talk to me. There were plenty of hot girls around. Hell, they all seemed to be at Sara’s waiting for him, but he didn’t pay them any mind. His eyes were completely focused on me, and at first it was flattering, but then it became unnerving.

  He was starting to bring these feelings out of me that I never thought existed. I’ve always wanted to know what it felt like to be turned on by someone, to desire and want someone. I thought Wayne, my so called ex–best friend, did that for me when we were in college. I thought that time that I threw myself at him meant that he was turning me on, but that clearly wasn’t what I was feeling.

  No, the moment Josh touched me, the moment our eyes met for the first time, and every time after, continues to take my breath away. As soon as he would walk into the café, my heart would start beating a mile a millisecond it seemed, goose bumps flooded my body and heat torched my soul and my panties became drenched. That, I think is what happens when you’re turned on. It was that moment I knew I wanted him.

  God, it’s the way he smiled at me. It’s the way he said my name that had me in a trance. And my God; the way his eyes looked right through me. He was so intense and scary… and so freaking HOT.

  I sighed again and closed my eyes. I was so afraid. I was afraid of the feelings that I was starting to have for him without even knowing him. And I was afraid of what that would mean if I ever got the opportunity to know him.

  But I knew that wasn’t possible. There was no way I would ever get the opportunity to know him.

  It’s crazy how just thinking about him could bring his cologne to mind… I inhaled deeply again then said softly, “Josh…”

  “Summer,” a deep voice replied behind me.

  My eyes shot open, Ho–lee Crap!

  I turned my head slowly to find the man who visited me in my dreams at night and was in my thoughts during the day, standing right in front of me.

  God, tell me he didn’t just hear me say his name.

  The smile that slowly crept on his handsome face, however, told me he had.

  “How did you know it was me behind you?” he asked me.

  Yeah, he would ask me that. Think, Summer.


  “Um, I remembered your smell.” I cringed the moment those words came out of my mouth.

  Josh frowned. “I smell bad or something?”

  Someone please help me.

  I shook my head, “No sorry… um… I mean your cologne. I remember your cologne.”

  “Ah, so my cologne smells bad then…”

  “Oh God.” I closed my eyes and shook my head.

  I heard a chuckle coming from him, which made my eyes shoot open and see the smirk evident on his face.

  “I have to say I’m rather impressed you remembered what my cologne smells like. Have you been thinking about me?”

  Shit!

  My eyes grew big and I shook my head quickly. “Oh no I haven’t…”

  “No?” he asked me.

  “I mean yes!”

  His eyebrows rose. “Really!”

  God, this is a disaster…

  I felt the heat creep up, and I knew I was bright red. I closed my eyes again and shook my head. Once again, I’m tripping over myself by just being around him.

  “I’m so embarrassed. Please excuse me as I jump to my death now!”

  He laughed. “No, please don’t do that.”

  I leaned back against the rail that separated the street and sidewalk from the huge plunge down the side of Mt. Washington. Josh walked closer to me and leaned over the same rail next to me.

  “It’s beautiful up here.”

  Thankful for the change of topic I turned around to face the city, too.

  “Yeah, it is. I sometimes come out here at night as a place to clear my head. Well, not exactly right here, mainly over by the main lookout area.”

  Josh looked over at me. “There is a lookout area? Where?”

  “It’s further down the street. There are two round protruding decks that you can walk out onto and really see the city unrestricted,” I told him.

  “Is that where you’re going now?” he asked me.

  “No, actually I just got off work, and I’m heading home.”

  I looked him over as he stared out onto the city. He was in a black suit with a grey shirt and black tie. The suit fit so beautifully on him, I knew it was tailored. I also knew it was a Brioni suit as well, and it wasn’t something you bought off the rack. Seeing him dressed like this was a complete turn on for me, and knowing and feeling what was encased underneath his clothes, I knew his body would make me lose my mind. I didn’t have much experience with men that I could actually use in this instance, but I thought if I was able to touch him, skin to skin, I would probably fall apart.

  Josh, probably feeling my eyes on him, turned to face me.

  Still leaning on the rail, he asked, “Do you have someone at home waiting for you? Like maybe a boyfriend, husband, fiancé, or significant other?”

  I couldn’t help the smile that tiptoed on my face.

  “No, I don’t have a boyfriend, husband, fiancé, or significant other waiting for me at home.”

  “Is that right?” He smiled, showing those beautiful dimples. “Well, is it possible that maybe you have someone waiting for you to call them once you get home, like maybe a…” he paused, then added, “…boyfriend, husband, fiancé, or significant other?”

  I looked down at the ground, hiding my blush when I noticed the expensive Italian shoes he wore. My gaze drifted to my own Kmart brand work shoes, and I sighed. There are so many glaring reasons I should just tell him I have a boyfriend to end this torture. He was giving me an out here, and I should have taken it. I could just say, “Yes, I have a boyfriend,” but why is my mouth not working right now?

  Just then I heard a horn, and I looked up to find my cab waiting at the curb for me. Saved by the bell, or horn rather.

  I smiled at him and headed to my ride without answering his question.

  “Wait!” he called out to me. I turned around and kept moving away from him. “Have dinner with me tomorrow night or lunch during the day, whichever you prefer.”

  I smiled. “Can’t, I have to work.”

  “All day?” He looked skeptical.

  I said without thinking, “Yes, Mr. Italian suit, I have three jobs.”

  He started walking to me, and it seemed I couldn’t make it fast enough to the cab.

  “What about breakfast? Can you meet me for breakfast tomorrow? I can come to you if you want. If you’re working at Sara’s tomorrow, that is.”

  I finally made it to the cab and opened the back door.

  I looked at him. “Don’t you have a girlfriend, fiancée, wife or significant other to take to breakfast, lunch and dinner?”

  He shook his head. “No, I don’t have anyone in my life to try and impress with my Italian suits. I’m new in town, and well, I was hoping that maybe I could find a way to impress you.”

  “Why?” I asked; I couldn’t help myself.

  He walked closer to me, placing his hands in his pants pockets again. He looked intently in my eyes, which I have to say was really unsettling.

  “Meet me, and I’ll tell you.”

  I moved my eyes from his and started to get in the cab.

  Josh said to me, “I hope to see you tomorrow.”

  All I could do was nod my head as I closed the door to the cab.

  Chapter 3

  Kenya

  The bell above the door of the café jingled, and I looked up at Sara. Sara and I were at the back of the café doing what we both used to calm our nerves, baking. Sara was a great lady. She was short in stature but large in personality. Raising six boys on her own, she said, was the reason why she was so strong and why at the age of fifty–five her hair was completely grey. She lost her husband close to twenty years ago and worked her tail off to keep the roof over their kids’ heads. She had a great family though. The moment her oldest became of age to start working, he stepped in and started helping his mother. He didn’t want his mother working herself into the ground, and it seemed one after the other vowed to take care of their mother, and that’s what they did.

  She owned her shop out right as well as the building space itself. Her second to the oldest bought it for her, and the rest of her boys all pitched in to give her startup money. They wanted her happy and not stressed anymore, and when you saw Sara, she was just that.

  She looked over at me and prodded. “Well, go out there and meet your guy. I got this taken care of.”

  Sara and I talked from time to time. She could tell when I came to work this morning something was up. I was a complete ball of nerves. I was spilling things, dropping things, more than usual, so she made me spill my guts about Josh and about my breakfast date today.

  I shook my head.

  “No, that’s okay. I’ve thought about this. Seriously, I have, and it’s better that I stay back here. Maybe Melanie can tell Josh…”

  “Tell me what?”

  I turned toward the voice I heard and saw Josh standing in the doorway of the kitchen. He wore a simple t–shirt and jeans, but he looked so good.

  Sara smiled. “You must be Josh… Welcome, I’m Sara.”

  Josh smiled, “It’s nice to meet you. You really have a goldmine here,” he replied and then looked at me.

  “Yes, we do.” She looked at me too, and of course I blushed. She then said, “Summer, why don’t you go take a break? I’ve got this.”

  I looked at her, eyes wide… Didn’t she just hear me when I said I was staying back here?

  I said, “I couldn’t leave you back here alone.” I turned to Josh. “We have been swamped this morning with orders. Do you mind if we take a rain check?”

  Please say yes!

  Josh nodded. “Of course I understand.”

  Then he did the strangest thing. He grabbed an apron and proceeded to put it on. I shook my head, confused.

  “What are you doing?” I asked him.

  “Well Summer, I’m putting on an apron.” He looked at a now grinning Sara and said, “You just said you’re swamped back here. I couldn’t leave with my conscience intact knowing I could’ve he
lped.”

  I put my hands on my hips and my eyes narrowed on him.

  “Do you even know anything about baking?”

  He scoffed. “Of course I do; I’m part Italian.” He looked at me, then back at Sara. “Put me to work… uh wait, let me wash my hands first.”

  He started for the large sink to his right, and I rolled my eyes as he washed his hands.

  “Ugh,” I replied and then looked at Sara. “You sure you don’t need me?”

  Laughing, she said, “Yes Summer, I’m fine. Go…”

  I undid my apron and signaled to Josh.

  “I’m ready,” I said to him as he dried his hands.

  He smirked at me, clearly amused at himself, and removed the apron.

  He said over my head, “It was very nice to meet you, Sara.”

  “You too, Josh,” she replied as we walked out of the back.

  I looked back and up at him as I asked, “Where would you like to sit?”

  He didn’t reply to me right away. He walked to the counter and grabbed a folded bag with Sara’s logo on it. He handed me the bag, then grabbed the drink holder that consisted of two coffee cups sitting next to the bag and took my hand in his.

  He said to me, “I was thinking we could go somewhere else. Don’t worry, it’s close by. Is that okay with you?”

  I couldn’t formulate any kind of words much less a complete thought, so I just nodded. He smiled at me, dimples out winking at me. Huh that was so strange. When he smiled at Stephen I didn’t see his dimples, but when he smiled at me they were clear as day.

  He led us out of the café, across the street and we walked for half a block, hand in hand. Then he turned left. I knew where he was going. There was a small makeshift park down a little ways in front of us with benches and concrete statues of animals and brick laid designs going along the ground. It wasn’t a park for kids, but just for people around the neighborhood to sit around on a nice day. And this morning, with the sun beating down on us, felt kind a nice.

  He handed me a hot cup and said, “The woman behind the counter, Melanie, said you prefer tea to coffee. So I got you tea with honey.”