by A. C. Wilson
“Technically it is their first child together, but he’s been with Harper since she was an infant. He is a great father.” Bailey’s smile was genuine, but her eyes spoke of regrets. Blake found himself wishing he knew what those regrets were and doing what he could to right them.
Is that really your job?
Cursed inner voice was a demon. A demon that wanted to wreck anything good in his life.
“It is an admirable thing to do. Not everyone can.” Blake added his two cents hoping that it wouldn’t make Bailey uncomfortable. He really didn’t know much about her family life other than her stepfather, half-sister and her mother was now deceased.
“The Johnsons are good people. You’ll have to meet their father sometime. Travis has a million stories and always very sweet. Maybe he could help you too, Blake.” Bailey looked desperate to change the subject and the guys let her. Nothing was worse than opening old wounds, especially ones that hadn’t healed properly.
“Garrett thought so as well. Do you think he will be at the dance on Sunday?” Blake asked, his chest tightening. He hadn’t forgotten about his motive for being here, but there was a new mission.
“They are always there. The Johnson family is quite a gem to Hot Springs’ legacy. Everyone knows them and they know practically everyone.” Declan answered as they stood there in the stables. Color was returning to Bailey’s face. Clearly she thought a great deal about this family and Blake was interested in meeting them. It was highly unlikely they were any relation at all, but they might know who his father was.
Don’t you mean who your father is? Not everyone is dead and lost to you.
Blake hadn’t thought much about living relatives. He was more interested in the history than the present and future. At least that is what he told himself. It was a deception that kept him sane for the moment.
“Sounds like my best chance to get my questions answered.” Blake smiled, but he knew it didn’t reach his eyes. Bailey noticed, but looked away. Declan nodded and turned towards the doorway. The sound of a diesel truck pulling into the yard brought all of their attention to who it was. Declan went first, Blake behind him and Bailey huffed in irritation.
“It is Garrett with the new horse. Let’s go!” She pushed by them and waved at the driver. Garrett waved back as he backed the trailer close to the stables and parked it. Blake offered a nod in recognition, but that was all. It was clear yesterday just what Garrett thought about him. Declan moved to the latch on the rear trailer door.
“Careful opening that latch. The spring has been sticking and it gets a bit tricky.” Garrett moved towards the rear of the white horse trailer. Johnson Ranch was written legibly in a sprawling red font.
“I have only seen him in pictures, but I hear he’s a beauty.” Bailey fairly bounced on her feet as she waited for the newest member of their therapy group. Blake thought she was adorable like a child at Christmas.
“Matt picked a good one. I’m sure he’ll be a favorite here.” Garrett smiled at Bailey and stepped back as Declan brought open the door. It swung wide. Blake watched with interest as Declan started talking softly as he entered the trailer. The trailer shifted as the horse was led outside. Blake couldn’t help but look at Bailey as the animal appeared. Her brown eyes went wide and a brilliant smile came across her lips. His heart flipped several times and that strangely buoyant feeling swelled.
Declan stopped the horse and smoothed a reassuring hand down its neck. Bailey slowly moved forward with her hand half outstretched to the horse’s nose.
“Aren’t you breathtaking?” Bailey half whispered as she let the horse sniff her. Blake held his breath wondering what might happen if the horse didn’t like her.
Trust. It is all about trust.
Blake watched as Bailey smoothed her hand over his thick neck across his shoulder to the horse’s rump. She spoke in hushed, soothing tones and Blake swallowed hard. It hit him with uncanny accuracy that he was jealous of the animal.
You want her to touch you that way. You want her to speak to you that way. Don’t deny it.
Blake’s gut twisted and he was out of the loop when he realized Bailey was speaking. Garrett had the nerve to look at him and raise a brow. The man might be tall and a couple years younger than him, but Blake didn’t think Garrett could beat him in a fair fight. It was odd that the man thought him to be a rival for Rayne’s affections. Clearly his girlfriend wasn’t as happy with their relationship as he thought she was and that was Garrett’s to fix.
“Blake, this beautiful boy here is what they call a Sooty Buckskin.” She patted the horse’s shiny neck and led him towards the stable door. Blake looked at the horse with renewed interest. He was a dark tan with a dark tail, mane and other points on his body.
“He is handsome. Does he have a name?” Blake asked Bailey, blocking the fact that Garrett and Declan watched them both with avid interest-Declan for good and Garrett for ill.
“Chaplain, but Chap for short. He was donated by one of our supporters and has come to live here at the center.” She smiled that brilliant smile again and Blake thought he and Chap would follow her anywhere with or without a lead rope.
“Chap is in good hands then.” Blake didn’t know what else to say that would be appropriate. He knew what he wanted to say to Bailey, but right here in front of this particular audience wasn’t the time.
“I’m going to head back to the ranch. Call me if you have any trouble. Matt should be over later today.” Garrett called after them and soon he and the trailer were gone. Declan seemed to have disappeared as well. The stable was devoid of all noise except for that of horses. Blake couldn’t get a single word to come out of his mouth. He could only watch as Bailey took the horse into the freshly cleaned stall. She patted Chap’s neck again while she unclipped the lead rope from the halter. Bailey came back out and closed the door.
Blake took in her beautiful face. Her skin tanned from the summer sunshine, her full lips slack and her brown eyes filled with questions. He could tell by the way they darted to his face and then away again. She hung up the rope near the door and as she moved away, Blake couldn’t stop his hand from reaching out to take hers. She was surprised by his boldness. He was also if he were honest. It seemed like the right thing to do. Only last night she had been in his arms and damned if he didn’t want her there again. He wanted her in so many places it hurt. The building was cooled by fans overhead, but right then the heat soared. He felt beads of perspiration on his forehead and he fought to control his breathing.
She came easily as he pulled her to him. He thought that her small hand squeezed his slightly. Those chocolate eyes never left his and he was painfully aware of her moistening her lips. Her cheeks bloomed a becoming shade of pink when she knew he had seen her. It all played out in slow motion in his head. Blake felt first her fingertips touch his stomach and ascend in their quest to claim. In that moment in that touch, Blake knew he had a claim to make.
Bailey’s lips were as soft and full as he thought them to be. They were tentative as his came down, but she responded quickly after that. Blake took her face his in hands and caressed the sensitive skin behind her ears. She stepped into him and it was even more atomically charged when their bodies met. Her breathing was quick and shallow as she clung to his shirt with one hand and his arm with the other. Her nails dug into his flesh. It only spurred on the spontaneous display. He could hardly name it.
His tongue traced the seal of her lips and with a soft inhalation of breath, she opened her mouth to him. Despite his blood pounding in his ears, Blake could still hear every hushed sigh that escaped her. It filled him and made the moment crystallize in time. Her hand smoothed up his cheek and into his hair. Bailey slipped her tongue into his mouth and he let her conquer him. It was easy. She tasted like heaven with a sweetness that knew no limitation. She was gloried release to a hidden man tortured by the walls. It was amazing, exquisite and terrifying.
Her body brushing against his was overpowering and he fought to
think. Blake knew they both needed rational thought. Emotions rarely overtook him, but today they had. Bailey caused him to feel so many things and he couldn’t help himself. Blake broke their kiss, but kept their embrace. He leaned his forehead against her own as their breathing fought to normalize. She had her eyes closed and her grip was punishing. Blake tried not to flinch from the scoring of her nails.
“Bailey.” The words came out on a sigh and her eyelids lifted slowly. The depth of emotion in her brown eyes caused his heart to slam in jarring, nearly painful beats. She held his gaze and all he could do was smile.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Garrett couldn’t help the misgivings that occupied him about Blake Phails. The man had shown up in town almost immediately snagging Rayne’s interest and now he was rooted at the center with Bailey. None of that could be coincidence. He rubbed his temples as he sat inside the truck cab still connected to the horse trailer on the Crossing Pines. His brain felt fried after all of the mysterious issues with Rayne, this vacationing soldier who wasn’t what he seemed, and everything he touched his fingers to felt like it was slipping. All of his hard work was back sliding and he felt powerless to stop it.
Poor, poor you.
Garrett would be the first to acknowledge the presence of residential demons. They had never truly gone away. It was like they had entrenched themselves into his soul and as soon as the world got too fast and too big they would encourage the havoc. Nearly a year ago his private world had bottomed out and he had found himself faced with freezing to death in a snowstorm. That same snowstorm where he found the love of his life hiding from her own.
Running his hands through his short hair, he tried to get a grip. He wasn’t sleeping well with Rayne pacing the floor and the more he pried the further she pulled away. He couldn’t help himself. He wasn’t good at being patient and it angered him. He knew he was part of Rayne’s distress.
Is she not happy with me?
Did I do something wrong?
Is there someone else?
Vicious, gutting questions plagued his mind and there were no answers to them. Rayne simply didn’t trust him to speak about whatever was hurting her. It was madness, pure and simple. It fueled suspicion and mistrust. It spoke to the darker side where he was always looking for a mal intent. He hated it.
It was probably a stroke of luck to find his father sitting on his front porch with an icy glass of sun tea. Travis Johnson lifted his blue eyes to his middle child and quirked a questioning brow. His old man never had to vocalize everything with Garrett. It seemed like they often spoke the same language. Garrett took off his hat, slapped it hard against his thigh and then let it rest on the back of the second rocking chair. Travis poured him a glass of tea and they sat there together. Meadowlarks trilled in the distance as they looked out over the ranch yard, the big red barn, and the acres of grass and trees beyond. This was home and it rooted Garrett amid the horrid winds of doubt.
“There’s never been anything so terrible that you couldn’t tell me. I hope there never comes a day that you don’t think you can.” Travis’s voice was soft, but resolute in his words. Garrett knew his father was right. Even when Lena had broken his heart and cast him aside, Garrett had been able to tell him that much. It wasn’t easy, but there was never judgment waiting. Garrett blew out a breath hoping that the dam inside him wouldn’t break completely.
“What happens when you find out that everything you thought was great really isn’t that great?” Garrett knew he was being vague. This wound hurt more than anything ever had. It was worse than the time he really thought he had lost Rayne for good. This time she was with him but not really there at all.
“One of those problems is it?” Travis looked into his tea glass at the floating ice cubes. “I guess you need to ask yourself what exactly you had figured out and try to find out what isn’t working. A relationship is all cause and effect.” Travis crossed one leg over the other and leaned back in his wooden rocker. Garrett pursed his lips and cast a sidelong irritated glance at his father.
“What is that supposed to mean, Dad? I can’t do riddles today.” Garrett wasn’t angry at his father, but at the answers staring him right in the face. He just knew if he could remove the obstacles then he would see what was going on.
“It means what changed? When did you notice that things weren’t right? You’re a bright boy, but you don’t always pay attention.” Travis put Garrett in his place and his son knew it. Garrett couldn’t deny the truth. He was often lost in his own world and imagined that Rayne was right there beside him. Sometimes he did forget to include her.
“Rayne has been a bit distant, but I figured it was her process for working through some past issues. I didn’t notice until she brought a stranger to lunch a few days ago. I noticed, because I was jealous.” Garrett looked at his father and Travis raised a brow. It was human nature to be jealous, but it was the first time he hadn’t been secure in their relationship. It threw red flags by the basketful. “She says she only wants to help him find his family. As hard as I try to brush him aside, he keeps popping up in the damnedest places. And she defended him yesterday when he came looking for help.”
That was enough to catch Travis’s full attention. Garrett gritted his teeth as he berated himself for feeling like a spoiled child who didn’t want to share his toy.
“Let’s back up here. Maybe you should tell me about this guy. It doesn’t sound like any of my children to turn away someone so out of hand.” Travis watched his son carefully and Garrett tried not to wiggle in his seat. Taking a deep breath, Garrett began at the beginning. He told Travis about Rayne bringing Blake to lunch, about him coming to The Hills to find a possible family connection, and how Garrett had brushed him aside when he had asked about Bailey. The whole time, Travis listened and nodded here and there. Nothing but curiosity was written on his father’s weathered face. Sharp blue eyes didn’t miss a trick though. Garrett wondered what was going on in that man’s head.
“It sounds to me like Rayne is being the person she is. She is a vet, loves helping animals and people. I really do not think this man is a problem for you.” Travis sighs and pours more tea into his nearly empty glass. “I don’t know Bailey very well, but I think it would be in everyone’s best interest to pay closer attention. I can’t blame Matt entirely, because he has his hands full. It is up to us to pick up the slack there.” Travis was in full father mode again and Garrett clenched his glass a bit harder than necessary. Crazy as it sounded, Garrett knew all that his father said was true. He couldn’t figure out what was possibly pushing Rayne away unless it was him.
“How are my guys doing out here?” Lacey’s sing song voice came from the kitchen door that led out to the porch. Garrett’s eyes widened wondering just how much his mother had heard of their conversation. He didn’t need her pressuring Rayne. He loved his mother dearly, but she wasn’t great at sharing her children with their significant others.
“Nearly out of tea. I guess that means we should get back to work.” Travis got up from his seat and smiled at his wife. Garrett longed for the easiness that came from a strong, loving relationship. His parents’ marriage had always gleamed so brightly for the world to see and notice. They made it look so easy.
“I’ll be out in a minute, Dad.” Garrett said as he finished off his remaining glass of tea. Travis looked at his son and held his gaze.
“I think you have other things to do today, Gar.” His father gave a slight nod and walked out towards the barn. Garrett watched the way he moved, noting the hitch in his limbs and wondering when his father had aged so much. He pressed his lips together and supposed that that was an issue for another time.
“How much did you hear?” Garrett didn’t turn to his mother when he asked the question. He knew she had been listening. It was just odd, because his father was the one each of the kids sought out for advice. Lacey sighed as she opened the screen door and moved into the open seat vacated by her husband.
“Just the bit
about Rayne and your new found jealousy.” Lacey tipped her head as if considering what she had heard, but she didn’t look over at him. Garrett was glad that she hadn’t. It was already as messed up as he wanted it. His father hadn’t given him the answers he needed.
“I want to fix this, but it seems like I’m going about this the wrong way. Everything I do just ticks Rayne off more.” Garrett sulked from his chair. He didn’t like it. It didn’t feel good.
“My dear sweet boy, your dad was right when he said you haven’t been paying attention. Rayne is afraid to tell you what is going on.” She heard his intake of breath and hurried on. “She loves you very much. I’ve never doubted that. She’s afraid of losing you.” Lacey rubbed her hands together and then wrapped them around her arms. It was almost unbearably hot and she looked like she was cold.
“I’m not going anywhere. Rayne is all I’ve ever wanted. Why would she think that I would leave her?” Garrett felt his head pounding at the wall that just wouldn’t fall down. It was blocking him from seeing the truth. So far his parents were being obtuse and talking him in circles. It was only irritating him further.
“Have you told her that lately, Garrett? Just as you can’t read her mind, she cannot read yours. She’s hurting and I think it has something to do with something she wants desperately.” Lacey got up from her chair and moved towards the kitchen door. Garrett closed his eyes and contemplated the words. They had been at odds with each other the last few days and he couldn’t remember the last time he told Rayne he loved her. Shaking his head, he got up from his seat and picked up his hat.
“Thanks, Mom.” He shared a half smile and set out across the yard to his truck. It was time to find Rayne and figure this all out. Whatever it took to convince her that he wasn’t leaving was worth it. He needed her, possibly more than he would ever be able to tell her.
