Little Gray Dress

by Aimee Brown

  Lily nods Josh towards their room before walking in my direction.

  “Ems…” She walks me towards the couch in the living room. “I think this is something you need to do on your own. Jack needs someone right now, and given the situation, I highly doubt he’s going to come out and ask for your advice. He probably feels like he’s ruined the only chance he had to get you back. I guarantee, he wants to talk to you, probably even needs to. Of all the people here, you know him the best. So you need to find him. Think of all the places he used to love to disappear to, and go there.”

  I don’t want her to be right. I know that she is, though. But why would he run away only for me to have to hunt him down, when he could have just stayed and made it easier for me? Maybe he doesn’t actually want to be found.

  “Fine. Pack for me. If you don’t see me between now and then I’ll meet you at the airport in the morning.”

  “Deal.” She smiles and turns to the stairwell. “We got the mansion to ourselves for the night!” she yells up the stairs to Josh, who peers around the doorframe with a perverted smile.

  “Ha-ha… Please don’t defile any of my stuff. I’ll be back.” I grab my purse and a set of keys off the entryway table and head out to the car Evan let me borrow. There are two places I think Jack could be: his office, or the yacht his dad owns that he loves like his own. Or maybe there is another place I know nothing about. Unfortunately, if that is the case, it’s going to make this hunt even harder.

  As I take the elevator up to Jack’s office, all the memories of the last time I was here come racing back to me. My heart feels like it might beat right out of my throat, and every part of me is sweating, even my ass. This is one of those fears that people force others to face so they can get over it. It’s terrifying. The ding of the elevator doors causes me to nearly jump out of my skin, and I have to force myself to creep out into the hallway slowly towards his office.

  I lightly knock on his door but don’t get an answer, so I try the handle, but it’s locked. Jack never used to lock his office door. I guess if there’s anything he learned from the whole Madison episode was to lock his door when he left the office. Or maybe, Greta helping herself to an engagement ring probably helped drive that lesson home too.

  “Can I help you?” A woman’s voice behind me causes me to spin round, nearly out of breath even though I’m not moving. “I’m sorry.” A young dark-haired woman in a suit, carrying a Starbucks coffee, approaches me. “I’m Heidi, Mr Cabot’s assistant. I’m sorry for scaring you.”

  “No, no, my fault. Is Jack… I mean, Mr Cabot, is he in today?” I watch the woman furrow her brows and frown.

  “I’m sorry, he’s actually called out for the rest of the week. Is there anything I can help you with?”

  “No, thank you.” I quickly walk towards the elevator trying to escape before running into anyone I used to know. He took off for the whole week? I guess it makes sense. I feel like I’ve had a bad week, but I think Jack’s has been a lot worse.

  “Emi? Is that you?” Damn it. I’m not fast enough, and Andy’s voice stops me in my tracks.

  “Andy, hi.” I wave at him.

  “My God, it is you. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.” His familiar smile actually calms me a bit. His hair is a bit grayer and he’s wearing glasses now, but otherwise he still looks the same way he did the last time I saw him.

  “Me neither, actually.”

  “What brings you into the office? Did you finally forgive Jackie boy?” He laughs as he walks towards me.

  “Um… No, well, kind of, I guess. Have you seen him?”

  “Not since Friday. Come on into my office, Emi. I want to chat with you for a moment.”

  “Actually, Andy, I can’t—”

  “I won’t take no for an answer.” He stands in front of me at his doorway.

  I sigh with a nod. There is no way out. “OK. But I really only have a few minutes.”

  “Perfect.” He walks to the chairs in front of his desk, sitting in one and motioning me to the other. “Jack made some mistakes with you.”

  I feel myself nodding. Yes he did.

  “I told him to do whatever he had to do to work it out, and he tried. He missed hours of work, came up with all kind of plans and ideas, and yet he always came back alone. It was heartbreaking to watch.”

  “Andy, I—”

  “Emi, Jack hasn’t been the same since the day you left. That May girl means not even half of what you did to him. She’s just a distraction, a replacement to take his mind off things. When he was with her it was like he was going through the motions, but his head was always somewhere else. I’m going to be honest with you, he’s not even the same lawyer he was since you broke up, but I’ve never had the heart to talk to him about it. I’ve been assigning him cases that don’t require a lot of deep thought, and sadly he hasn’t even noticed. That’s not the Jack we know and love.” He sighs and smiles at me sadly. “I love Jack like a son, you know that. He’s a broken kid.”

  “I’m sorry,” I say. He’s not describing a Jack I know. The Jack I knew did everything he could to be successful at his job.

  “I just want you to hear him with your whole heart, Emi. Don’t be so stubborn that you won’t at least allow him to prove he’s never moved on from you, despite the way it may seem. You two are a perfect match.”

  “Thanks. I’m actually starting to hope you’re right.”

  I watch as he stands from his chair. He nods towards the doorway with a grin. “You can go now.”

  I nod at Andy and stand to leave. As I reach the doorway Andy says my name again, causing me to turn around. “Jack loves you more now than he ever has.”

  “How do you know this?”

  “He tells me every day he’s here. Every day since you left he comes in here for coffee, and we discuss ways he could get through to you and possibly bring you back home with him. Every. Single. Day. May was just a mistake to try and get over you. He never did though.”

  “What?”

  “He never really wanted her. He’s just gone through the motions, hoping that one day he’d be able to move on. But when you never showed interest I think he gave up.”

  “Do you by chance know where he could be?” I ask him, hoping that since they’re so close maybe Jack called him.

  “Unfortunately, I don’t. He was a man of very few words when he called this morning. Just said he needed a break.”

  When he says this, I almost start to ugly cry right here in Andy’s office. It just hit me. The war is over. I love Jack.

  “I gotta go.” I can’t stand here and talk about it anymore. I need to fix it. Even though I’m not sure how, or what exactly I’m fixing.

  First things first, though. I have to deal with Liam.

  When I walk into the bar, Liam is standing behind the counter wiping out cups. A smile spreads across his face, which makes my heart sink. The minute I left Andy’s office I knew what I needed to do.

  “Hey there. How’s my favorite unlucky bridesmaid?”

  “Liam… I wanted to talk to you.”

  “Uh-oh. Sounds like we’re breaking up.” He winks at me before walking around the counter and taking a seat on one of the barstools. “I think you should do it.”

  “What?”

  “I saw the way he looked at you at the wedding. And when a man looks at a woman that way, especially after everything you two have been through, you should be with him.”

  “You’re talking about Jack?”

  “Who else?”

  “I’ve been really stubborn, and I might have led you on a little. I never do that, and I wanted to apologize before I left.”

  “Don’t worry about it. Actually, I should be thanking you.”

  “You should?”

  “Yes. I asked for a favor in exchange for our deal, and without even knowing it you gave me one.” He pauses with a small smile. “I’ve been playing it safe for far too long, and you reminded me why I shouldn’t do that.” He�
��s nodding his head, through an almost frown. “Jack loves you.”

  “I know.”

  “Do you love him?”

  “I think so.” I nod at him. For some reason, I can’t say it out loud yet. There is too much unknown.

  He laughs with a nod. “There is something I didn’t tell you before I left the wedding last night.

  “What?”

  “I didn’t realize it until the middle of the blow-up, but, I’ve met Jack before. He came in a few weeks ago, by himself. He sat right here and drank.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. He looked like he was troubled, so I got him talking for a few minutes, and I felt for him. I wish I’d realized it was him sooner.”

  “What did he say?”

  “He was nervous about seeing the only girl he’d truly loved. The girl whose heart he broke, even though things weren’t quite as they seemed. He felt like it was his fault that you were both miserable, possibly forever. I’ll tell ya, I’ll never forget the way he talked about you. He misses you, and if I’m reading him right, he truly loves you.”

  “Thank you for telling me.” My God, I am an idiot. I could have fixed this years ago and saved us both so much heartache.

  “My pleasure. You’re a great girl, and he’s a lucky man. I’ve no doubt you two will work things out.”

  “Thank you, Liam, for everything.” I hop off my stool and hug him. “You made this weekend a little easier.” I head for the front door. “You have my number and if you’re ever in Dallas…”

  “I’m gonna call ya.” He waves as I walk through the door, his face a combo of happy and sad.

  Liam is a great guy, and in any other situation I’d have jumped at the opportunity to date him. I’m making the right choice, though. All the leads I have today are all taking me back towards Jack.

  To be honest, for the most part I’ve never felt the way I do right now about Jack. It’s almost overwhelming. Like I’ve been struck by lightning from my head to my loins. The only part I wish I could delete from this equation is Greta’s pregnancy. If it wasn’t for that, everything would be perfect.

  I jab Lily’s number into my phone before I start my car.

  “Hello?”

  “Did he come back?” I ask.

  “Not yet. But there is something here I think you should see.”

  “I’m on my way.” I end the call and pull away from the bar, glad that Evan’s house isn’t far. What could there be? Luckily it only takes two minutes to get to my brother’s house, and when I pull up I see what the something is. Amelia is waiting for me, sitting in one of the two rocking chairs Hannah has out on the front porch.

  “Amelia, what are you doing here?” I ask her, a little worried that something has gone wrong.

  “Emi, I’m glad you’re here. Have a seat.”

  “What’s going on?” I ask her nervously.

  “I’m going to assume you know what’s going on between Jack and Greta?” The seriousness of her face makes me squirm uncomfortably in the chair. The good feeling I had fifteen minutes ago is quickly fading.

  “Yes, he told me.”

  “Well, I am here to set you straight.”

  “Straight?” I ask, confused.

  “Greta has proved to be a compulsive liar, and I honestly think she may be a tad mentally unstable, but that’s just my own opinion of a girl who’s taken complete advantage of my son.” She pauses for a moment and looks to me with her lips pursed and her eyes narrowed. “Greta Mayfair is not pregnant.”

  “What?!” I half-yell at her in shock, jumping out of the chair.

  “I found it peculiar that she should choose the day after Jack broke things off with her to suddenly announce that she’s pregnant, didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, but… Greta is a psycho.”

  Amelia stifles a pinched laugh and nods her head in agreement. “That’s one word for it. When she announced this pregnancy, I was suspicious and decided to look further into it – and I’ve discovered that Greta is not pregnant at all.” Her tone is steady and unnerved.

  “How did you find this out?”

  “I paid her a visit and she told me.”

  I let out the breath I’ve been holding in and laugh almost uncontrollably. Greta is not pregnant. It was another lie. Oh my God, she’s not pregnant!

  I burst into tears, as Amelia stares at me with a shocked look on her face.

  “Sit down.” She motions to the other chair. “Are you OK?”

  “So… She’s really not pregnant?” I bite my lip, unsure of what to say now.

  “She’s really not pregnant. I questioned whether she was telling the truth as well, but I drove her to my doctor’s office for an ultrasound as proof. When we got there she confessed in the parking lot. There is no baby. Her and Jack are officially over, and she’s preparing to leave the country with her father so she can discover who she truly is.” Amelia leans towards my chair. “But I wouldn’t be surprised if that too was a lie, covering the fact that she’s admitted herself to a hospital to fix whatever is wrong with her.”

  She laughs to herself. I sit silently, nodding my head.

  “Well… Are you interested in finding him or not?”

  “Yes.” The smile that’s now spread across my face, through the few tears still escaping probably make me look just as crazy as Greta. “Where is he?”

  “I thought you’d never ask.” She reaches into the purse sitting near her chair and hands me a plane ticket to Cancun San Lucas.

  “He’s disappeared there more than once while he and Greta were together, I’ve been told. I found out that it was someplace you said you wanted to get married one day, so I assume he’d go there because of you. I already called the hotel Greta told me he stays at, and he’s there. It’s the one in the notes here.” I glance at the card inside, and the same hotel we stayed at when Lily got married is written there.

  My heart stops. He goes there. Even though he was on board with the huge wedding Amelia wanted us to have, he remembered what I said that night so long ago when I thought he didn’t hear me. And he tries to relive it anytime he misses me.

  “Thank you.” I realize I’m crying again when Amelia stands and pulls me towards her for a stiff hug.

  “I’m so sorry, Emi. You didn’t deserve any of this. If I had only known sooner what had really happened that day you two broke up, maybe I could have helped get to the bottom of it before it went this far.” She holds me at arm’s length, sincerely apologizing for everything up until now.

  “Thank you.”

  “Go.” She nods before walking away from me to her car.

  I turn to walk into the house, but Lily greets me at the door with my suitcase, with Josh not far behind her. “Let’s go.” she says.

  “But—”

  “She told us before you even got here.”

  “Oh my God, Lily! I almost can’t believe what’s happening! This is the right thing, right?”

  “You really are going to ask me that now?” She laughs and walks my suitcase out to the car, tossing it into the back seat and opening the door. “We’ll drop you off at the airport. You know you want this, so stop trying to over-think it.”

  “Yeah.” Why must I bawl at a moment that should be the feel-good moment of my life? Well… the almost feel-good moment of my life. “I do. Did you guys know about this?” I ask them and watch them both shake their heads.

  “Not until about an hour ago. We couldn’t have planned this out if we were writing a movie.” Lily laughs and reaches over to grab Josh’s hand. “It’s beyond romantic, Ems. And it’s not even over.”

  “Right.”

  The hardest part is still waiting for me: how to break all this to Jack.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Six and a Half Years Ago

  Waterfront Park, Portland, Oregon

  The Meet Cute

  “Oh my God, I am so sorry.”

  Even though I have my hands over my face, I know his voice. Never in a million
years did I picture actually meeting him at the exact moment I’m assaulted by a rogue Frisbee. When I peer through my fingers he’s kneeling in front of me, with ten other guys behind him, reaching for my hands.

  “Let me see it,” he says, wrapping his hands over mine. “Go get her some ice!” He yells at someone near him. “Is anything broken?”

  When he pulls my hands from my face he lets out a little gasp. “Is it bad?” I ask him, worried about what he’s seeing. Is my eyeball hanging from its socket? Is there a gaping wound? Is my brain (or lack of brain) visible?

  He laughs. “Nah, you’re going to have a black eye, but I think your skull is still intact. I’m really sorry.”

  “Oh.” I wave my hand at him trying to play it cool. “It’s no problem. It’s actually why I came down here. I haven’t had enough black eyes in my lifetime, and I was needing a memorable Fourth of July story to tell my grandkids.”

  “Well… I don’t think you have concussion. Your wit seems to still be still intact.” He laughs and sits next to me, inspecting my face closely. “It didn’t break the skin but it is starting to swell. I feel like a real ass.”

  “You should, you ruined my face.” I try to joke through the pain.

  “It’s a very pretty face too.” He smiles at me sympathetically. “I feel like maybe I know you from somewhere.”

  “You do, I’m the girl who makes great coffee.”

  He comes to my coffee window nearly every day. His passenger seat is always piled high with books, and every day he orders the same thing: an Americano with room for cream, with two sugars. I never talk to him, apart from taking his order. How can I? He’s beautiful. Probably easily the most gorgeous guy I’ve ever not formally met. His baby face melts my heart every time he smiles at me as I hand him his coffee.

  “Right! You are the coffee girl. I knew I knew you. How weird is this?”

  “Weird that I don’t spend every waking moment at the coffee shop?”

  “No.” His friend returns with the ice. He gently raises it to my eye that is feeling puffier by the second. “Weird because I always want to talk to you but, you know… In the drive-up, there isn’t a lot of time for conversations.”