Every Breath You Take (Bayou Devils MC Book 3)

by A. M. Myers

We sit across from each other at the table and I pull the gun out of my waistband, setting it down between us. He arches a brow and I shrug, smiling at him.

  “So, what is it that you wanted to talk about?” he asks and my stomach does a little flip.

  “Uh… you know how I told you about the pregnancy scare in high school?”

  He nods. “Yes.”

  “Well, that was really only the start of it. I moved out right after graduation because I was rebellious and wanted to be on my own but it was way harder than I ever thought it would be. I was struggling to make ends meet when I met Beth. She was working as an escort and told me all about how much money I could make…”

  “Are you saying you were a hooker?” he asks, shock filling his voice and I glance down at the table, twisting my fingers together. Why do I even care so much what he thinks of me?

  “Not exactly. I never had sex with anyone but I did get paid to go out on dates with them.”

  “So, in the coffee shop, when you told me that you’d been waiting for someone special, was that a lie?”

  I shake my head. “No. Those dates, they weren’t real. I was there for companionship and they could talk to me about anything they needed to get off their chests but that was it. As soon as the date was over, I didn’t speak to them again unless they booked another date and I never even kissed anyone.”

  “Why did you quit?”

  “One day, Beth showed up at my apartment, beat to shit. Apparently, her date didn’t get the memo about the no sex thing and when she told him, he lost it. I rushed her to the hospital and she was there for three days. By the time she was discharged it just wasn’t worth it to me anymore.”

  He stares at me as he lifts his coffee cup to his mouth and I wring my hands together under the table, fighting my urge to get up and run into the kitchen. “Did your mom know? Does your brother?”

  “No and I would prefer that Theo never finds out. It’s not a time in my life that I’m proud of but I was too determined to make it on my own without my mother’s help. Please tell me you don’t think I’m a terrible person?”

  With a quick shake of his head, he reaches across the table and grabs my hand. “No, Tate. I think you are one of, if not the strongest person I’ve ever met in my life and I certainly can’t judge you for your past when you haven’t judged me for mine.”

  “Why haven’t you been in a relationship in six years?” I ask and he sighs, scrubbing his face with his free hand.

  “I suppose turn about is fair play, huh?”

  I nod.

  “After Nora died, I was lost and I met this girl, Tara, who made me feel sane again. Looking back, all she did was give me a place to hide and pretend like I was fine again but at the time, she felt like my saving grace so I asked her to marry me.”

  I suck in a breath and try to pull my hand away but he refuses to release me.

  “On our wedding day, I was standing at the altar, waiting for her to walk down to me when my mom walked into the church and told me that Tara had run off with my best friend.”

  Her loss, I think and try not to look smug as he continues his story.

  “Anyway, I kind of lost it after that, packed up everything I owned and threw it in the back of the Camaro. I left town and just traveled all over the country for two years until I landed in Baton Rouge and I promised myself that I would never get close to anyone again.”

  “You and I are so alike it’s a little scary,” I say and he smiles as the phone starts ringing again. Sighing, he glances over his shoulder.

  “What are you going to do about that?”

  I shake my head. “I don’t know yet. I’ve been kind of hoping that he’d get bored.”

  “And if he doesn’t?”

  Shrugging, I squeeze his hand. “Then, we’ll deal with it.”

  “I like the sound of that. Do I get official boyfriend privileges now?”

  Boyfriend.

  My mind spins at the mention of the word and I suck in a breath, meeting his warm golden gaze.

  “About that… I do want this but I need to take it slow. I’m not just going to jump into bed with you because you used the word boyfriend or say you want more.”

  He smirks, leaning back in his chair. “Shit. I knew you wouldn’t make this easy on me.”

  “Yeah,” I muse, standing up from my chair as the machine picks up and I silence it as I pass by before sitting down in Lincoln’s lap. “But it will be so worth it.”

  Leaning in, I thread my fingers through his dark hair and press my lips to his as he lets out a low groan that shoots straight to my neglected core. Damn, resisting him is going to be one hell of a challenge but I’m determined to do things right this time.

  Chapter Twelve

  Lincoln

  Where the fuck is she?

  I frantically flick through each video feed, searching for movement or a shock of red hair but I come up with nothing. Glancing up at the house, I sigh. I watched her walk in the front door ten minutes ago and after going through her mail and deleting more weird messages from the answering machine, she went into her mother’s room and disappeared. The only reasonable explanation is that she’s in the closet but I can’t, for the life of me, figure out why. When I first started following her, I went through each room in her house so I could see the layout in my mind and the closet in her mom’s room is so small, I don’t even know how she fits in there.

  The phone rings and I go back to the bedroom camera, waiting with bated breath and sure enough, a few seconds later, she appears at the bottom of the screen and walks out of the bedroom.

  What the fuck?

  When she gets to the dining room, she sets a piece of paper down on the table and I squint at the screen, trying to read it but it’s impossible.

  “Hey, Theo,” she answers, leaning back against the wall. “Yeah, I’m doing all right. How are you?”

  Putting the phone on speakerphone, she sets it on the dining room table and walks to the fridge.

  “I’m fine, T. Same as always. But I’m worried about you,” Theo says, his voice barely audible and I turn the volume up on the tablet. Tate laughs.

  “Why are you worried about me?”

  “I don’t know. I just have this feeling.”

  Tate walks back into the dining room with a glass of sweet tea in her hand and sits down at the table.

  “Are you sure you’re not confusing worry with indigestion?”

  “Tatum,” he growls and she laughs again. “I’m serious.”

  “So am I, Theo. Everything is good here.” Her teeth sink into her bottom lip, which I’ve learned recently is a sure sign that she’s lying. She picks up the paper and stares at it for a second, worry on her face. I’ve got to see that damn note.

  “Well, you do sound better.”

  Dropping the paper to the table, she smiles. “That’s because I am.”

  “Any particular reason?”

  Her smile grows and I’m glued to the screen, my heart pounding in my chest.

  “Yeah, actually. You remember the guy I told you about?”

  He laughs. “The one you tased?”

  Fucking perfect.

  How many other people did she tell?

  “That’s the one. He showed up at the door the other day and we’re giving things a real shot.”

  “Whoa, this is huge, T.”

  “I know but it feels so right.”

  Shaking my head, I turn down the volume. I’d love to sit and listen to her tell her brother about me but I can’t stand the guilt eating away at me. Not when she sounds so happy because that’s all I want for her and I can’t brush away the sinking feeling that I’m going to ruin her.

  Focusing back on the paper, I try to read it again but it’s just too damn small. I toss the tablet down and grab my phone, dialing Streak’s number.

  “Streak’s Technical Support. How can I help you today?” he answers with a bored tone and I bark out a laugh.

  “I need you to zoom in
on one of these cameras, smartass.”

  “Which one?”

  I roll my eyes. “The one Tate is in. I need to see what that note on the table says.”

  “On it,” he murmurs, the sound of typing filling the line and I grab the tablet, watching as it zooms in on the note but it’s too blurry to make out.

  “Can you make that any clearer?”

  “Nope, sorry. You’ll have to go inside to get a look at it.”

  I sigh. “Okay, thanks.”

  He hangs up and I lay my head on the headrest, staring up at Tate’s house and debating if I should go see her. It’s not that I don’t want to because I do, badly, but I hate lying to her. I’ve never been a dishonest person and these secrets are eating a hole through me each time I’m near her. Two days ago when I showed up on her doorstep, all I could think about was doing whatever it took to get her back and if I didn’t have to lie to her, I would be totally comfortable with being in a relationship for the first time in six years but this whole situation is complicated. We ended up spending the whole day together, watching old TV shows and her favorite movies. It was a cool way to learn all the little things about her that I’m dying to discover. Afterward, I made dinner for us and she was a totally different woman. She’s still quick to break my balls but she’s letting me in – in ways that she didn’t before – and there’s this sweetness to her that doesn’t feel fake like it did the night we officially met. Honestly, I’m addicted.

  Our relationship is on shaky ground though and I’m the only one that knows it. One wrong move from me, one thoughtless comment could make this whole thing blow up in my face and it’s something that I can’t even imagine.

  “There’s got to be a way out of this,” I whisper, my anger with Blaze growing. He’s gotten more irrational as the weeks have gone by and I’m at the end of my rope. Besides Streak, no one else in the club knows what I’m doing every day and if Tate ever finds out, she’ll kill me. Although, I’d rather be dead than watch her walk away from me.

  The thought stuns me and I blow out a breath, the gravity of it crashing down on me. I’ve spent so long avoiding feelings of any kind and then here comes Tatum Carter, knocking me on my ass and swallowing me up in her orbit. It started with the photo but meeting her, getting to know her – it sealed my fate and I can’t walk away now. If this ship is going down, I’m going down with it.

  “Shit,” I grumble, reaching for the door handle because I can’t stay out here any longer. Not with my girl only fifty feet away from me. Opening the door, I climb out and a car in the side mirror catches my attention. I spin around and as I shut the door, the same car from Valentine’s Day pulls away from the curb before flying past me. Adrenaline surges through my veins and I watch his taillights until he turns left, disappearing from my sight.

  What the fuck is going on here?

  “Lincoln?” Her sweet voice calls to me and I take a moment to just let it soak in. I don’t know how much longer I’ll get to keep her so every moment has to be cherished. Turning toward her house, I barely hold back a laugh as she crosses her arms over her chest and arches a brow.

  So damn sassy.

  “Hey, babe.”

  “What the hell are you doing in the street?”

  My mouth pops open and I realize that I have no excuse to give her. “Uh, this guy was just sitting in his car. I don’t know… it seemed weird.”

  “Or maybe he was just looking up directions, you crazy man.”

  It’s my turn to cross my arms and pin her with a stare. If she thinks for one second that I would ever let something go instead of investigating it, she’s lost her damn mind. I’ll never do that again.

  “Or they were a creep and had no business being in this neighborhood.”

  She rolls her eyes and turns back to the house before peeking over her shoulder. “Well, are you done searching for the boogeyman or do you want to stand out there and get hit by a car?”

  “Are those my only two choices?”

  “Yes,” she yells, turning back to face me and leaning against the railing of her porch.

  “I guess I choose you then.”

  Her smile is blinding and my heart skips a beat as I stare up at her. I can’t help but grin as I jog up her front walk and wrap my arms around her. God, I fucking love her attitude.

  “Smart man,” she whispers, leaning in to me and I meet her halfway, claiming her lips in a kiss that ignites every cell in my body. Fuck, she’s everything. My poison and medicine, heaven and hell, fire and ice all rolled up into a body that was made to fit against mine. That’s the crux of it all. She was made especially for me and in the end, I’m going to destroy us both with my lies.

  “Mmm,” she hums, pulling away from me with a dazed look in her amber eyes and I want to throw my fist in the air because I put that look on her face. The caveman in me wants to show the world that she’s my girl.

  “You have plans today?” I ask and she blinks before meeting my eyes.

  “Not exactly.”

  I tilt my head and scowl. “What does that mean?”

  “Um… I have a couple things I want to go do but you don’t have to go with me if you don’t want to.”

  She tries to wiggle out of my grasp and I pull her closer, shooting her a look. “Babe, if you’re there then I want to be there.”

  “You keep saying shit like that and I’m going to fall in love with you,” she whispers and my heart stalls as a smile stretches across my face.

  “Sound like a fucking plan to me.”

  We just stare at each other for a moment before she drops her gaze and shakes her head.

  “All right, let me go get ready and then we can go.”

  Reluctantly, I release her and watch as she heads toward the stairs. “Where are we going?”

  “I want a tattoo,” she calls down to me and I arch a brow as I slowly approach the dining room table where the piece of paper from the video still sits.

  “What are you gonna get?”

  “I don’t know yet.”

  Laughing, I grab the note and read through it once before scowling. It looks like lines from a script or something but I’ve never heard of it. I flip the paper over and find Tate’s name written on the front with a piece of tape folded over the edge. The floorboard above me creaks and I pull my phone out of my pocket and snap a picture to send off to Streak. If anyone can figure out what this means, it’s our boy genius. By the time Tate walks back into the room, the note is back on the table and I’m inspecting some of the photos on the wall.

  “You look just like your mom,” I say.

  “Yeah, people used to call me her mini-me.”

  I point to the guy in the photo. “Is this your brother?”

  “Yep, that’s Theo.”

  “He doesn’t look anything like y’all.”

  She walks up behind me and slips her hand in my back pocket as she stares at the photo. “I know. I always wondered if he looks just like our dad.”

  “Do you want to find him?” I ask, wondering if that’s something Streak could do for me. She shrugs.

  “I don’t know. I’ve always wanted to know who he is but I don’t know if I’d want to meet him. I mean, he’s had twenty-five years to give a damn about Theo and me so should I really bother worrying about him?”

  I wrap my arm around her and pull her into my side, loving the feel of her next to me. “Maybe he doesn’t know about you.”

  “That’s possible, too.” She pulls away and clears her throat. “You want some sweet tea or something?”

  “Sure, baby.”

  Turning, I watch her walk into the kitchen, the gentle sway of her hips conjuring up images of the two of us spending the whole day in bed. I respect her need to take things slow but damn, that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Especially not when I’ve been imagining what it will feel like to sink into her since the moment we first met.

  She walks back out with two glasses of sweet tea and sets one down in front of me before trying
to turn away but I grab her and deposit her in my lap. She scoffs.

  “You know I have plenty of chairs, right?”

  “But why waste one when you can just sit on my lap?” I ask and she laughs.

  “They’re chairs. You can use them more than once.”

  I shrug. “So? You’d still be all the way over there instead of right…here,” I whisper, trailing my hand up the bare skin of her thigh until I get to the hem of her shorts. Her eyes flutter closed and she releases a breath as she drops her head back, exposing the side of her neck. Leaning in, I press my lips against her skin and a soft moan slips past her lips and straight to my cock.

  “Fuck, Tate,” I hiss and she wiggles her ass with a giggle.

  “It’s your own damn fault.”

  Growling, I wrap both arms around her and squeeze until she starts to squeal.

  “Oh my God, let me go before you break me!”

  Her words hit me straight in the chest and I turn away as I loosen my hold. “So, tattoo time, then?”

  “Yes, please,” she says with a smile and I know it doesn’t matter how many times I have to lie to her because I’ll come back for that smile alone every single time.

  * * * *

  Streak:

  It’s from the Merchant of Venice.

  Me:

  Shakespeare?

  The buzz of the needle drowns out the other noise around us and I glance up, meeting Tate’s eyes as she smiles at me.

  “Everything okay?”

  I nod. “Yeah, sweetheart. Just club stuff.”

  She nods and I get up from my seat to check out how her tattoo is coming along. When we first rolled up to From the Ashes Tattoos, the shop that Blaze’s son owns, she was insistent on getting one for her mom but she couldn’t decide what she wanted so she went with the letter “T” with a little two up in the corner for her and Theo. It’s actually pretty damn cute.

  My phone buzzes again and I pull it out.

  Streak:

  Yep.

  Me:

  What the fuck does it mean?

  The buzzing stops and I glance up as her artist, Kenny, grabs some paper towels and squirts it with soap before rubbing it over her ink.