Hold On, Pain Ends

by Shyla Colt

  “Thanks, D.”

  He nodded and headed out of the kitchen past her.

  She followed him, a ghost in a waking world as she thought back to her time with Adrian.

  ~Past~

  “Honey are you ready, yet?” Adrian asked.

  “I’m coming,” Birdie called smoothing her hand down the white lace dress. She’d splurged, treating herself on the beautiful piece of clothing she’d spied in a shop window. The sheer sleeved piece accentuated her collarbone and stopped a few inches above her knee. She pulled her hair partially back and let her curls flow free. Pleased with the extra effort she’d put in for their date, she nodded at her reflection and stepped out into the living room. With their hectic schedules of class and work, they didn’t get to spend much time together, and rarely went on dates.

  As the end of the quarter approached, she’d pondered what would happen to them. There had been little talk about the wedding, and they seemed to be drifting apart. The fancy dinner date had her thinking the planning would begin sooner than later. She smiled as she meet his gaze.

  “Oh, don’t you look adorable,” Adrian said.

  Not the response I was going for. “Thank you.”

  “It’s a little casual for where we’re going, but you’re with me. No one will say anything.”

  Her mood plummeted. She never felt like she lived up to his expectations. It made her wonder why he wanted to be with her at times. His world was full of fast cars, expensive clothes, and vapid women. She’d seen his previous girlfriends. He made her believe he wanted to turn over a new leaf when they started their study group together. She’d seen it for a while and now, he seemed to be closer to his old self.

  “Sorry, you never said where. I thought this would be appropriate.”

  “It’s okay.” He leaned in, kissed her forehead, and wrapped an arm around her waist.

  They moved from her apartment to the parking lot where he held the door open to his black Jaguar. She eased in careful not to flash the world with her bare thighs and settled into the smooth leather. The sleek vehicle still held the new car scent. Fastening her seatbelt, she placed her hands in her lap and peered out the tinted window as he climbed in, started the car up and pulled away from the curb.

  The college neighborhood gave way to large homes, exclusive boutiques, and ritzy restaurants. He pulled into the Lodge, a winery and steakhouse combo that cost more than some people paid in rent.

  Her nerves were frayed as they pulled up to valet parking. The young man in a black slacks and a black button up helped her out of the car, and she watched as Adrian smirked down at him.

  “Make sure you take care of her, old boy,” Adrian said with a wink. He held out his arm, and she hooked her arm in his as they walked into the massive building.

  Classic music played as they walked over the marble flooring to the ornate hostess area.

  Adrian leaned in and tapped his finger on the open reservation book. “That’s us.” He pointed to his name on the page.

  “Ah yes, sir, we’re ready for you.” The host led them through the sea of round tables with crisp white linen table clothes decorated with swan napkins and silver cutlery. The host pulled out her chair and pushed her back in.

  He ordered the most expensive wine and their meals like he always did. The man loved to be in control. They made small talk as they sipped their wine and waited for the food. As usual, the food was exquisite and the wine pairing was perfection.

  There was an undercurrent between them that made her antsy. “What’s the occasion?” Birdie asked as she patted her lips with her napkin.

  “You deserve this and more, Birdie. I wanted to say thank you. Without you, I never could’ve gotten through this last year of school.”

  Her cheeks grew heated. “You’re smart, Adrian. I just—coached you a bit. You didn’t need to do all of this,” she whispered.

  “And I know you mean that. God, you really are so sweet.” He reached across the table and took her hand. “That’s what makes this so very hard.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked.

  He released her hand and reached inside his jacket pocket to pull out an envelope.

  “Adrian?” Her blood ran cold. Her stomach knotted.

  “This is for all your trouble and hopefully, your silence.”

  “Silence?”

  “Had I known you were truly what you seemed to be…I would’ve approached this entire thing differently? But in my world, you’re an anomaly. So, I did what I do best.”

  Tears blurred her vision. “What’s that?”

  “I seduced.” Adrian slid the envelope across the table. “You’re a sweet girl, and pretty in your own way. But you’d never fit into my world. They’d eat you alive, dear girl and neither of us would be happy. I’m too shallow. I’ve tempered it for you over the past year. You’ve seen the best I have to offer, and at times it’s clear for me to see you’re less than impressed with that.”

  Her mouth went dry, and her chest tightened. It’d all been bullshit. Her lower lip trembled.

  “Oh, please, let’s not make a scene. We’ll tell everyone we realized we weren’t a good match, and decided to part friends. You’ve learned a lesson. Never let a man use you for things. Be sure you get yours often and first.”

  Her jaw dropped.

  “It’s a world full of shark tanks, Birdie. Be glad I only nibbled on you. So many others would devour you whole.”

  His words resonated and stayed, following her long after the disastrous dinner ended, and her heart broke for the first time in her life.

  ~* * *~

  ~The Present~

  Birdie drove home from the clubhouse with the past nipping at her heels like impatient pups. She’d been blind while she was in the middle of the relationship, but outside looking in, there had been plenty of red flags. He’d always been more cordial than loving, and while their make-out sessions were pleasant, they never set her on fire.

  Not the way Clue did.

  She hadn’t understood how good it could be between a man and a woman until the blonde man entered her life and refused to be pushed out. He was brass, upfront, and open. He’s not Adrian. He was so different from her ex…it was comical. He would eat Adrian for lunch. When she was with Clue, she felt like she was on top of the world. It was easy to be with him.

  They connected on a level she’d never experienced before. I’d be a fool to let this chance pass by because of a spineless piece of shit who tried to pay me off. He’d cut her deep, and the wound had scarred over. The lasting effects brought irritation.

  Clue went slow, but he made it known what he wanted. He pushed her in the most delicious way.

  She’d committed to caring for his mother even before they met. It wasn’t in her to say no to someone in need, when she could help. Working that closely with him and remaining detached wasn’t a possibility.

  I’m in my pajamas at three in the morning over this man, and we’re not even officially dating.

  Butterflies formed in her stomach as she allowed herself to indulge in what-if’s. Other than work and family, nothing held her to North Carolina. Maybe things never worked out there because this is where she was meant to be. The girl who once believed in fairytales, climbed out of the darkness, lifted her face to the light and dared to hope.

  CLUE

  “How’s the head?” Lefty asked loudly.

  Clue cringed and flicked him off.

  Lefty laughed and slapped his back. “Remember to take aspirin and a glass of water before you pass out next time.”

  “Thanks for the sage advice…you fuck,” Clue said grinding his teeth.

  “I get that you tied one on, but I need you to get yourself together and meet me back here in twenty minutes.

  “You need me?”

  “Need you to take a ride with me and see a man about some files.”

  Fantastic. “Alright. Let me spackle my brain back together and change my clothes,” he replied. He needed to g
et a hold of Birdie and make sure she was okay. Shit got hazy after she walked in. He’d thought maybe she was a dream until he saw the room was spotless. Shit, she probably thinks I’m a fucking wreck. He’d been trying to rid himself of his splitting headache before he called her.

  It’ll have to wait.

  He drained the black coffee in his mug and pushed himself off the stool. He blinked to moisten his dried out eyes. He stepped inside his room, inhaling the piney order of Lysol and a lingering floral scent he associated with Birdie. There’d been something about the clean-up that made him think Old Lady. He stripped down, tossed his clothes into a hamper, and moved into the bathroom.

  The heated spray cleared his muddled head and eased his sore muscles. His knuckles screamed in protest, but the hot water helped ease the soreness. Going to be a bitch typing for a minute. He lowered his head letting the water run over his head as he focused on the job ahead, instead of his mother’s situation. That would always be waiting in the wings to torture him.

  Sobered and dressed in a clean pair of jeans, a white t-shirt, and his cut, he strolled back to the bar where Lefty waited.

  “You good?” Lefty asked.

  “Yeah, what am I doing?”

  “Tracking funds. We think someone’s been trying to skim money form Taffy’s.”

  Clue scowled. “Who’d be that stupid?”

  “You’d be surprised,” Lefty replied dryly.

  Clue shook his head and followed the Vice President outside. The sun-battered his eyes until he slipped on his sunglasses, ignoring Lefty’s laughter. He climbed onto his bike, and they left the lot. The wind blew away the remnants of his foul mood and he enjoyed the trip to Taffy’s. By the day, you’d never know it was a strip club. It looked like an upper scale restaurant. Gia was smart when she set the building up.

  Of course, knowing what he knew about her now, she was highly aware of what she was doing. Raised in the sex trade, she’d escaped a life of servitude to become her own boss in charge of her destiny. It was a rags to riches in the most ironic way. A sex trade worker who’d found her salvation through a strip club.

  He backed into a spot, lowered his kickstand, and climbed off. Lefty unlocked the door, and Clue followed him inside. It was a strange being at the club during the day. The pole looked lonely. The tables were bare, echoing an air of sadness. Clubs were for entertaining and fun.

  Lefty lead him down across the room to the office in the back.

  “So what’s up with the money?” Clue asked.

  “I don’t want to tell you. I want you to compare the paperwork with the computer in an unbiased manner.”

  “Alright man,” Clue said with a shrug. He moved behind the desk, booted up the computer, and flipped through the paperwork Lefty delivered. He opened the accounting program, careful to keep his mind blank and impartial. Good with numbers, he crunched them in his head on paper and compared them to the computer over the past few months. They matched. “Numerally, it all matches. But you already know that. Why are you suspicious?”

  “Because we should be making more. Business has been booming, and the numbers we projected before were much higher. I’ve been watching it for a while now. Waiting to see if it balanced out. Gia hired a new manager because our old girl left, and she’s more paranoid than I am.”

  “Hmmm. What was this girl’s history?” Clue asked.

  “Office management for a couple of companies. All of them had glowing references and letters of recommendation for her.”

  “Then why did she leave?” Clue was suddenly wary.

  Lefty shrugged. “Claimed she wanted a change of scenery. The last couple of places were in different states, Texas, and Arizona.”

  “Or she wanted to leave before they saw what she was doing,” Clue surmised. He began to dig into the computer system. There were a variety of ways to cipher money. Some people used programs they embedded into the computer, and others were external. Both lead to bank accounts where they gathered their stolen spoils. “I’m not seeing anything here right now. But I’m going to install a program that will act like big brother and record everything. That way, we’ll have the account if she is stealing. I’d also suggest we set up some cameras in the office. You need to play it cool and act normal. If she’s guilty, any signs that you’ve discovered what she’s doing, and she’ll bail. We’ll never know how much money you lost.”

  “So, we need to get cameras in here. I want you to man them.”

  “I’ll link up an IP Web cam.”

  “Let’s make it happen, I want it up and running tonight.”

  “Your wish is my command Mr. VP,” he smirked.

  Lefty rolled his eyes. “Just get the shit going and get out of here before she comes in for the day at seven.”

  “I got this,” Clue said running through the list of places that would have what he needed on hand. There was an underground network of suppliers who offered specialized equipment for the right price. He latched onto the task, leaving the office with a game plan in mind. The sooner he got done, the sooner he could see Birdie.

  ~* * *~

  He slumped down at the kitchen table and took a giant bite of the sandwich, the sweet butt, Tawny made him when he got in from Taffy’s. Everything had been procured and set up. The clock was pushing five o’clock. He sent a text to Birdie. Thanks for everything last night.

  He lives! I was getting worried.

  Clue smiled and texted back, had to take care of club business as soon as I woke you. You missing me?

  Maybe. ;) We need to talk.

  The words made his soul drop. When a woman said that it was either really good or really bad. When and where?

  Now. Can I come to you?

  He tapped his reply onto the screen of his cell, sounds good. See you soon.

  He’d been polite. Done the noble thing, and waited to let her get her bearings. Now he was going to show her how a Dueling Devil handled business. If the situation with his mother taught him anything, it was how unpredictable and short life could be. He walked out back and lit the blunt he’d swiped off High. He took a deep breath and held it in his lungs. Mellow was the way to go with this situation. He watched the sun sink into the horizon as his muscles loosened and his mind wandered.

  The door opened.

  He turned to see Birdie walk toward him. “Hey,” he greeted with a smile.

  “You have any for me?” she asked.

  His jaw dropped.

  She laughed. “I’ve dealt with many cancer patients. I’m no stranger to the strains and benefits of marijuana.”

  He snickered. “So fucking proper. I like it.”

  She inhaled and blew out, forming a smoke ring. “I wonder if you still would if you knew how deep that ran.”

  He quirked an eyebrow. “Now, I’m even more intrigued.”

  “Is that how you feel about me?”

  “I feel a lot of things about you, Birdie,” he stated firmly.

  She passed the joint back, and he took a long draw.

  “The feeling is mutual,” she said shyly.

  “You remember what I told you?” he asked.

  She peered up at him and gave a slow smile. The sultry expression was another side of her he’d yet to see. “You said a lot of things, Clue.”

  He nodded. “I did. Let me refresh your memory.” He moved to stand in front of her. “Open your mouth.”

  She did as she was told.

  He blew smoke into her mouth as she sucked it down her lungs and held it. She blew it back out, and he traced her lips with the tip of his tongue. “I’m done playing nice,” he whispered taking her lips.

  She wrapped her hands around his biceps and leaned in. Her tongue slid into his mouth and tangled with his own. Her nails dug into his flesh, and he moaned.

  Kitten has claws. Her breasts pressed into his chest and her hardened nipples made his dick rock hard. Before, he had backed down and let her recover. Right now, he was a man starved and on a mission. He ran his hands
down her body, caressing her curves and memorizing her reactions to his touch. He lingered on her hips kneading the flesh. She pressed her lower half against him, and he ground into the heat burning him through their jeans.

  They parted for air, and he nibbled her ear. “I can feel your heat through our clothes, babe. Are you going to let me make you feel good tonight?”

  “Please.”

  “You don’t ever have to ask. I’ll always give you what you need.” He gripped her ass and lifted her into his arms.

  She wrapped her legs around him and held onto his neck. “Put me down. I don’t want you to strain your back.”

  He delivered a firm slap to her ass. “Only thing straining is the dick you feel trying to get out of my pants.” He gripped her ass and moved her up and down the bulge in his jeans. The friction became a delicious torture.

  Her breath caught in her throat, and her face grew flushed. Her eyes darkened to black with lust. “Oh, m-my God.”

  The wonder in her voice made his chest swell. Whoever she’d been with last had fucked her over in more ways than one. He stubbed out the forgotten roach on the ground and carried her to his room. He tossed her onto his bed.

  The blood left her face.

  He knelt in front of her, ready to murder a motherfucker. What had that bastard from her past done to her? “You okay?”

  “I have to tell you something. It’s why I came. I want to be with you, and see where this goes but I—there are things you don’t know a-about me. I’ve never done this.”

  “Dated a biker? I knew that.”

  “No.” Her cheeks turned bright pink. “Had sex—I mean—all the way.”

  The words sucker punched him. He opened his mouth and closed it, unsure what to say.

  “Is that a problem?” she asked.

  Possessiveness rose inside him. He spread her legs and bent down, inhaling her scent. He nudged the crotch of her shorts with his nose. “You telling me…all this is mine?”

  Propped up on her elbows she glanced down at him and shrugged. Her hair tumbled around her face, and her eyes watched his every move.