Somewhere In The Middle

by Lucas Coon

  "Are you sure you can do this Darren? Seriously it can wait until tomorrow if necessary. I have my water." Mitchell pointed to the water bottle contained within the mesh side pocket of his backpack. As he was pointing it out to them, he realized that it was empty. On the other hand, there was a decent sized wet spot on the floor from where the cap was loose and the water made its daring escape. "Well, I had my water." His voice went from confident to discouraged. "Regardless, I'll be fine. If you guys have water, then I can live until the morning. Nothing will change between now and then."

  "Mitchell, we walked in and thought you were dead. If it's from dehydration, then we seriously need to get you some water. I'll be OK. If I'm grabbing and you're shooting, if necessary, then we'll be fine." Mitchell reluctantly agreed to this sentiment. As long as the gun was in his hands, and Darren didn't have to kill anything, they should be able to accomplish this mission. Aside from that, he could tell that Darren needed to prove his worth to Kayla, and probably even himself. If he was going to be the big hero and protect his family, then he had to prove that he could actually do so. What would've happened if Mitchell hadn't been there? Darren would've been the one that got attacked, and Kayla would've become a widow. It was a good thing he showed up. Without him Darren wouldn't have the backbone he had at this point; nor would he want to actually go out and get supplies. Had he not shown up, would they have survived the following week? That was a question that he didn't want to consider answering.

  "Alright, we can go. We don't have long so we should probably go sooner than later. I'll meet you at the door if you want to go get the bags." Yet again they had all agreed to go out. Darren made his way to the kitchen, while Mitchell and Kayla made their way to the front door.

  "Is he really OK Kayla?" Mitchell wanted to gauge what she thought. He was typically a good judge of a person's mental state and whether or not they were in good standing, but Darren had made this difficult with his husband and father bravado that he had paraded out here recently. Mitchell got it, he wanted Kayla and Lilly to look at him as a strong man, as someone completely capable of protecting them if there was an emergency or a situation where he needed to be heroic. No matter how he tried to analyze Darren's characteristics, it was incredibly difficult to tell how he was feeling at any given time.

  "I think he's alright. He wouldn't go through what really happened up there though." She phrased this sentence in a manner that indicated that she wanted to know, and Mitchell was the one that she was asking. He stared her down for a moment and debated whether or not he wanted to relive the situation. He decided that she deserved to know, and he was going to have to be the one to tell her.

  "We got in and the floor looked empty. From what we could tell, there were no infected up there. We walked through the center line and it was silent. When we got to the kitchen, we saw what you were describing; food, drinks, everything. It was quite nice up there. I filled the bag and we each filled our pockets. As we were leaving, we let our guards down and I was hit by an infected. He tackled me to the ground and got the bag off my shoulder. I was trying to get him off me and was yelling to Darren for help. He raised his gun and looked ready to fire, but he froze. I think it was just the thought of having to shoot someone that was, at one time, another living, breathing human." Mitchell paused for a moment. He took a deep breath and thought about whether or not he should detail the rest of the story. "That monster was staring me down and was going to kill me. Thankfully, Darren shot the bastard and saved my life." He opted to leave out the fact that Darren's eyes were closed when he pulled the trigger. He decided that she didn't need to know something that may tarnish his image, he would remain a hero in her eyes. Darren approached the conversation, shopping bags in his hands. He looked ready to go on a shopping spree at the local food mart, not ready to take the death and destruction of the outside on in an attempt to save his and his family's lives.

  “So, aside from almost getting killed is there anything else to discuss about your trip?” Kayla looked at Darren in a scolding manner. “Anything else you didn't tell me Darren?”

  “Would you please stop? I really just didn't want to talk about shooting another human being. You do realize I killed him, right? I shot him and, whether or not he was infected, he is now dead. You of all people should know how much that screws me up.” He returned her serious glare.

  “I know. Just calm down though. It was self-defense and you know that it's not your fault Darren.” Kayla grabbed Darren's hand and looked him in the eyes. “You really don't need to dwell on this honey. Let it go.”

  “It's just the water right?” Mitchell interrupted their conversation with his own thought. Once Darren had approached the group and started talking to Kayla, he'd removed himself from the conversation and started thinking about the infected. Once he made his statement, he realized how detached from what was playing out in front of him he'd become. The look that Kayla was giving him didn't help either. “Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt.”

  “Do you just decide to randomly tune out everything around you? That's not a good thing to do when you're trying to survive, Mitch.” Darren patted him on the shoulder. “I'm not going to babysit you, just know that. If you decide to ignore what's going on around you, I'm just going to let you get eaten man. I can't risk my life to save yours.”

  “I wouldn't expect you to.” He looked down at the floor. Darren started to chuckle slightly and Mitchell looked back up at him.

  “Calm down there skipper, I was just kidding.” Darren's chuckle turned into a full laugh. “Wasn't I the one that said we needed to look out for each other? Do you really think I would just leave you somewhere?”

  “I...” Mitchell looked at the man that was now laughing at him. He looked even more disappointed when Kayla started in. “I see. So that's the kind of people you are.”

  “If you're easily offended, you may have a better chance with the infected than him.” Kayla nudged her husband in the shoulder.

  “For once she's right.” Darren took a verbal swing at his wife. She looked at him with her mouth open and her nudging quickly turned into a smack.

  “You are an ass Darren Barber!” The two of them laughed, Mitchell didn't feel like joining in on the joyful moment, but did so anyways. His mind was too busy racing with the possibilities of whether or not he was infected. He hadn't drank the water but he had been covered with blood from one of the monsters. Did it matter though? Was there a difference between ingesting the blood of an infected and drinking tainted water?

  “Mitch, what is up with you man?” Darren noticed that he'd stopped laughing and that, even when he was, it was incredibly forced.

  “Nothing. I'm just thinking about the fact that we really need to be careful out there and it' best if we stick together. I don't think any of us would make it if we split up.” He desperately wanted these thoughts to be ones that they agreed with. If he left, he would much prefer that they came with him. If they all went together, there was a better chance that they would survive in the end. They needed someone that would be able to lead and take care of what needed to be taken care of, regardless of what was required. Mitchell could be this person. He didn't have a negative thought about Darren, but he was confident that he wouldn't be able to repeat the situation upstairs. Mitchell would happily lead them; he enjoyed being in the front of a group, it's why he thought the way he did and why he was the way he was. He prided himself on his ability to persuade people to do things that he wanted them to do. He also liked to believe that his ability to read a person like a column on the center of the sports section of a newspaper was uncanny. He knew that there were a number of people out there that could pay attention to details and could figure people out by their words and their movement, but he firmly believed he was special in this manner. "Regardless, we were going to go down and get what we could right?” When he finished his question he started thinking about how worried Kayla had to be about these trips. There was no way she was going to be able to stay
sane knowing her husband was outside risking his life, even if what they were getting was necessary. "Have you guys tried the radio lately? Is anyone out there broadcasting?”

  "We haven't. I guess we should probably check. We shut it off when the air went dead, but maybe someone out there got on after the fact." This was a moment of realization for Kayla. "Why haven't we been checking it?"

  "It just didn't occur to me that it may come back. With all the chaos out there, I just assumed dead air would be, well, dead." Darren chimed in sarcastically. "Kayla, while were out, go ahead and check the stations. There may be something informative going on. If not at least see if there's something good on, the silence in here is almost painful.” Kayla nodded in agreement. The three of them stood at the door for a few seconds, all thinking their own thoughts. “I swear, if I'd known how quiet this place was I would brought my damn music player.” Darren's sarcastic statement led to more nervous chuckling and silence amongst the three of them.

  "Alright. I'll look into the radio and you guys just be careful please." Kayla broke the tension as best she could. It was a relief. Mitchell was busy thinking about Aria, and Darren was lost in thought about the infected being in the building, something he hadn't thoroughly considered in the first place, but was now fully aware of the fact they he was sharing his lodging with monsters that were more than willing to kill him for a meal. This thought sent a shiver down his spine. He wondered if he would actually be able to protect them, if he could get them out of this situation alive. Would their lives ever go back to normal? It hadn't been that long, but normal seemed so far away. Would he ever wake up in his own bed, wrapped in his own sheets, next to Kayla, to the annoying tones of a standard alarm clock, on a Saturday morning? On the list of the million things he desperately wanted, the simplest seemed to be the ones he desired most.

  "Mitchell. Let's go. We don't have much longer until the sun goes down." With that statement they opened the door and made their second trip out to the violent world past the thin steel door. Kayla watched them leave. She met eyes with Darren as he exited. As their stares locked, his frown turned into a smile. She couldn't help but smile back at him. No matter how scared she was over what they were doing, or what could happen, a simple smirk on the face of the man she loved was enough to lift her spirits. Any time they were in a rough spot, she'd always turn to him to be the comic relief. Through his humor, or general optimism, he would always help her to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The men exited, the door shutting hard behind them.

  As the lock clicked shut she could feel the tears starting to well up in her eyes. Her focus wasn't on surviving, it was just on them living. Like Darren, she thought about whether or not life would go back to normal. She desperately missed staying up late on Fridays with Darren and Lilly, watching animated movies and laughing at the jokes that they inserted for adults to make the movie bearable. She missed hearing Lilly's laughter while watching the cartoons. She missed the comfort of their couch bathing in the glow of a moderately priced television screen. A normal Friday night would involve her leaning on Darren, being held in his arms, with Lilly laying on the floor in front of them. She never liked sitting on the couch with both of them, she always complained that it was "too crowded".

  After the movie finished, Lilly would always be passed out. Kayla always thought it was adorable how, every Friday night, Lilly would loudly exclaim that she was going to stay up all night. Every Friday night was going to be the night for her, and she would always be asleep by nine. Kayla couldn't remember if she was like this when she was four and five. For such a young girl, Lilly showed some ambition. She was devoted to the things she did, and worked hard to be successful. This was something that Kayla fell in love with. Lilly had promise. Kayla always assumed that she would grow up to be an actress or a politician, neither of which she actually wanted her to be, but both viable options. She showed the drive to be something great.

  Kayla turned away from the door. She looked around at the situation they were in. Those Fridays were definitely a thing of the past. She would kill to have some way to go back in time and just relive one of those nights. Just one, that's all she asked. She shut her eyes and felt the tears trail down her cheek. She wiped them away quickly and recomposed herself. She was never one to show strong emotions. When she was a child, she wasn't allowed to, which she first learned when she was a little older than Lilly. Her oldest memory was of the night when she saw what her father was truly capable of. She woke up one night and heard yelling. She did what any curious child would do; she got out of bed to investigate the source of the noise. She walked out of her room and slowly crept down the stairs to where she saw her mother and father both standing opposite of her older brother. He was staring down, with his fists clenched, breathing heavily through anger. She remembered the events as if they happened yesterday.

  -----

  "Do you have any idea what time it is Kevin?” Her father's screaming pierced her ears. “I told you to be home by nine! You're twelve years old Kevin! You are not an adult, you have to live by our rules!" Despite being a smaller man, in both height and weight, her father was capable of screaming loud enough, and violently enough to make up for his stature. She remembered watching from the second step up. Her parents had their backs to her, so she wasn't worried about being seen. "Where the hell were you?"

  "I'm sorry! Tommy's parents took us out to dinner and I forgot to tell them I had to be home! I got back as quick as I could!" Kevin tried to maintain his temper. "I know I'm late! I'm sorry!"

  "I don't care where you were or whose parents you were with! You are to be home by nine!" Kayla could see her father's shoulders tensing harder than they had prior to this statement.

  "Alright! I get it! I'm Sorry!" Kevin shouted this back at their father. As he said this, the floodgates of his eyelids burst into a torrential downpour. Kayla could see the fear in his eyes.

  "I don't think you do get it, but, dammit, you're about to!" Her father pulled his arm back and thrust the back of his hand into the side of Kevin's face. The smack of the older man's knuckles against the child's face was the one sound that she would never forget. Kevin's face beamed red from where the hand connected, but he didn't shutter or stumble. He took the hit and just stared up at the monster in front of him. She remembered her father as a monster. A monster no better than the ones they had to deal with today. Kayla's eyes opened wider as she watched her father hit her older brother. At the age she was, this situation was impossible. Her father, taken aback by the fact that Kevin didn't flinch, lifted his arm for a second go.

  The little girl at the bottom of the stairs had her first burst of adrenaline at that moment. She stood up and ran at her father screaming.

  "Stop it! Daddy, stop it! Don't hit him! Stop being mean!" As she ran at him his attention turned to her, as did his rage. He turned and shoved her back. While it may not have been a hard shove, when you’re a full grown man exerting energy on a six year old child, anything is too much. She fell backwards onto the floor.

  "Don't touch her you jackass!" Kevin turned from a frightened child to someone trying to protect an even more afraid child. He charged at his father and swung. The contact that was made did nothing more than frustrate him further. He lifted his hand again and introduced his fist to the side of Kevin's head. Kevin fell to the ground, completely unconscious. Kayla sat with her back against the wall and watched this happen. She looked up at her mother. She remembered her face as being completely unaffected. Why was she not doing anything? Why was she not caring that the man she married was attacking her son, and now attacking her daughter? Kayla never knew the fact that her mother was a victim too, but she always assumed. She guessed that she got it the worst, and if she ever tried to stop him, she'd get it ten-fold.

  Throughout her childhood, from that night on, her father was the reason for her anger and fear. He would beat her anytime she showed emotion, and would hit her brother anytime he did anything wrong. None of them would attempt
to defend the others, because they knew what would happen. Five years later, when she was eleven years old, and her brother seventeen, it all came to an end. Her father was on an aggressive rampage the night of her eleventh birthday. She had a small party with some of her young friends at their house. Her mother had made a cake with rainbow confetti, and had even dyed the cake a pink color with food coloring. It was exactly what she had asked for, and she loved it. The party was great, there were six preteen girls all giggling over the latest actor of the summer blockbuster. Her brother was sitting on the couch in the living room watching a generic action movie, and her mother was in the kitchen preparing to serve the cake. They all started to sing her the standard birthday song when her dad walked in the front door. As he walked in, the smiles and the air of joy drained from Kayla's face. Her friends weren't aware of her dad’s abusive tendencies, but they could tell something was wrong by the look on her face.

  "Mom, you said he wouldn't be here!" She whispered angrily to her mother.

  "I know. He was supposed to be at work all day. I'm sorry..." She had the same somber look as Kayla when she saw him. "I'll try to get him away from your friends."

  Her mother stood up and walked towards him to cut him off from the party. "Hey honey. How's it going?"

  "Pretty damn bad, thanks for asking. Our entire unit got laid off today, so I'm not exactly in the best mood." His volume began to increase as his sentences carried. "What the hell is going on here?" He motioned towards Kayla's group of friends at the kitchen table.

  "Honey, I'm sure you remembered that today is your daughter's eleventh birthday. I thought it would be nice for her to have some friends over. I made a cake and we have ice cream--" She was cut short by the aggressive outbursts of the man in front of her.

  "I don't give a damn whose birthday it is. I just got laid-off, the job got cut permanently, and now the only income we have is whatever crap money you make. I don't want to come home on this kind of day and have to deal with a bunch of brats sitting in my house, eating what little money I have left."