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RomanQuest

Page 11

by Herbie Brennan


  Inside in a huge chamber, empty of all furnishings except weapons racks around the walls, teams of men are hacking at each other with swords, stabbing at each other with spears and tridents, trying to net each other, lasso each other, trip each other and generally do each other a great deal of damage.

  “Ecce hic est!” roars the huge man.

  “Look who’s here,” translates the Mercury Phone, perhaps a little freely.

  The fighting men stop fighting at once and turn in your direction.

  “It’s our new recruit!” exclaims the huge man. “Our newest little lamb to the slaughter, eh?”

  There is a roar of coarse laughter.

  “Orl right,” goes on the huge man, “who’s going to help me with the training?”

  A villainous-looking brute with close-cropped hair and a squint steps forward. “I will, Marcus,” he grins.

  Marcus turns to you and grins in his turn. “Welcome to Gladiator School,” he says.

  This clown has obviously mistaken you for somebody else. The question is, do you tell him so and slip away quietly to 150 to select another destination. Or do you risk standing your ground at 103 in the hope that a little gladiator training might come in useful if it doesn’t kill you?

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  136

  “Hup duo tres ... Hup duo tres!”

  “Hup two three ... Hup two three!” your Mercury Phone wakes up suddenly and translates.

  But the last thing you need is a translation. The character bouncing towards you is like every gym teacher you’ve ever known - beefy, hearty, thick and suffering from far too much energy.

  “Get moving!” he calls to you encouragingly while jogging on the spot. “Vigorous exercise is what you need! Get the circulation moving. Get the pores open. Get the heart pumping. Get the brain active.”

  “Didn’t do much for yours,” you mutter under your breath. But you do a few quick arm bends to keep him happy before taking a quick glance at your Brief Guide to find out what’s going on.

  The entry under Roman Baths solves the mystery. There was usually a room devoted to vigorous exercise just before you entered the baths themselves and this seems to be it.

  “Hup duo tres ... Hup duo tres!” the idiot in charge chants like a looped tape.

  Before you fall over from exhaustion, I’d better tell you the southern door from this place is labelled CXXXI while the door to the west is marked CXXXXI.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  137

  “Wrong!” exclaims Caligula delightedly. He looks thoughtfully into the middle distance. “Forced to eat yourself alive from the toes up, I think.”

  After which painful experience, you can make your way to 13.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  138

  The building is open to the public although few enough people have entered. The sign above the door reads:

  ARA PACIS

  “The Altar of Peace,” whispers your Mercury Phone.

  It’s obviously something to do with the Emperor Augustus since the altar itself, which takes up much of the interior, is covered in reliefs showing aspects of the new age brought in by Augustus’s reign. You can see depictions of a sacrificial procession and others of individual members of the Imperial Family.

  As you turn to leave, a hawker grips your arm. “Today’s special offer!” he exclaims. “A ticket to the Theatre of Pompey!”

  You turn on him angrily, “How dare you disturb the peace of this beautiful place!” you snap. “Your sort shouldn’t be allowed in here!”

  “The ticket’s free,” he tells you. “No purchase necessary.”

  “Oh, all right then!” You snatch the ticket before he changes his mind.

  And make your way back to the tourist map at 25 to select another destination.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  139

  “Wrong!” exclaims Caligula delightedly. He looks thoughtfully into the middle distance. “Trampled by elephants, I think.”

  After which painful experience, you can make your way to 13.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  140

  “Perhaps I will, perhaps I won’t,” you tell her cautiously. “I’d need to know who you are and how you want me to help you.”

  “I’m the sibyl -” the wild-eyed woman tells you wildly.

  “Hi, Sibyl,” you nod politely.

  “No, no, I’m not Sibyl - I’m the sibyl. My name’s actually Antonia, but you don’t have to worry about that now.”

  “You’re ... the sibyl,” you say uncertainly. “You mean like that loony prophetess they had back in Ancient Rome?”

  She shakes her head. “No, not like that loony prophetess they had in Ancient Rome. I actually am that loony prophetess they had in Ancient Rome. Or one of them anyway.”

  This old girl is definitely a nutter’s nutter. You decide to humour her. “If you’re a sibyl in Ancient Rome, what are you doing here?”

  “I’ve come to your century to find someone.”

  “You mean like a lost relative?”

  “I mean like a hero prepared to take on impossible odds, happy to face unimaginable danger, delighted to stare down death, a hero who laughs in the face of terror, strong enough to overcome the most fearsome monster the world has ever known, brave enough to -”

  Boy, is she ever in the wrong shop! If you want to give her the bum’s rush (politely) you can do so at 80. As against that, if you’ve nothing better to do, you can ask her a few pointed questions at 50.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  141

  “Hello?” you call. “Anybody here?”

  The chamber is like a Turkish bath. There’s so much steam you can’t see from one end of the room to the other. In the public baths you would normally move from the exercise court to the calidarium or hot room then on to the sudatorium, or steam room to be scraped with a thing called a strigil to get rid of the sweat. But here the calidarium and sudatorium seem to be combined, probably to save space.

  You have a look round to see if the steam is generated the same way as in a sauna by pouring water over heated rocks, but discover it’s coming up from under the floor through some sort of sophisticated piping system.

  Phew, it’s hot in here!

  Maybe you’d better move before you melt. There are two doors in the eastern wall. The northernmost is marked CLIX, the southernmost CXXXVI.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  142

  The man looks at the ticket, looks back at you and scowls.

  “This is a forgery,” he says, raising his club.

  Looks like you’ve been conned. Grind your teeth, release a little smoke from your ears, then get back to your map at 25 and select another destination.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  143

  There’s a large, bustling crowd around this gate out of the city. For a moment you think you’ve stumbled into a market - possibly even a slave market - but what you’re seeing doesn’t quite fit.

  As you move towards the high arch, a burly man calls out, “Hey, you - yes, you with the funny-looking clothes. You look like a willing young person. Want a job?”

  “Job?” you echo, frowning. “Why would I want a job?”

  The man sniffs. “Well, you’ve come to the Hiring Gate, haven’t you? This is where everybody comes in Pompey when they’re looking for employment. Now come on, what do you say? It’s light work and I pay a full sestertius a week.”

  “No thank you,” you call and turn towards freedom through the gate.

  Another man with clos
e-cropped hair steps into your path, his hand on his sword. “Just a minute you,” he says sourly, “how do we know you’re not an escaped slave?”

  You really don’t have time for this with the volcano about to erupt at any second. But you have three choices. You can take your chances that Vesuvius doesn’t blow and stand around arguing with these louts at 93. You can mount a surprise attack and fight your way through the gate at 111. Or you can turn back to 150 and pick another destination from your map.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  144

  “Wrong!” exclaims Caligula delightedly. He looks thoughtfully into the middle distance. “Minced up and fed to lions, I think.”

  After which painful experience, you can make your way to 13.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  145

  You are definitely in the wrong place here. One glance tells you you’ve arrived at the Praetorian Camp, the barracks of the elite guard pledged to protect Caligula with their lives. The last thing you need is to get involved with these boys.

  So why are you standing there staring. Get out your tourist map at 25 and select another destination, preferably one as far away from this place as possible.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  146

  “Dagger?” you echo. “What dagger?”

  “You haven’t brought the dagger?” Cassius screams in rage and frustration as he signals one of his men to teach you a much-needed lesson.

  The Praetorian has 50 Life Points and a +5 sword. If you survive the encounter, you can stagger off to your map at 25 and select another destination. If you don’t, you can only stagger off to 13.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  147

  The door swings open and to your profound embarrassment you find yourself staring at a little man sitting on a lavatory.

  “Can’t you read?” he demands angrily. “I hung up a KEEP OUT notice.”

  “I’m sorry,” you stammer, backing out. “I’m a stranger here myself. Not familiar with the language. Please forgive -”

  “If you’re not familiar with the language, why don’t you get yourself a Mercury Phone?” he snaps. “They’re so simple even a Greek could use one.”

  “Yes, I’ll do that. Thank you. So sorry to disturb you while you’re - so sorry to disturb you. I’ll just be going now. Sorry.”

  As you start to close the door, the little man says, “Wouldn’t happen to have a little Venus statue about your person, would you? I need one for my collection. I can trade you an Emperor’s Pass if you have.”

  If you happen to be carrying a Venus statue, you can swap it for an Emperor’s Pass and the little man will be so grateful he’ll show you a short cut to LXXIX. If you haven’t, sheer politeness would dictate you return at once to CXVIII and stay there until you win one after which you can come back here and make the trade.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  148

  “Just try to stop me going where I want to go, you sad-faced old scumbag!” you shout angrily. “I’ll have you know I’m a friend of the Sibyl.”

  “Then she should have predicted you’re about to come to a sticky end,” says the sad-faced man gloomily, drawing his sword.

  The sad-faced man has 50 Life Points and his sword is sharp enough to hack bits out of you at +5. If he hacks enough to kill you, go to 13. If you get the better of him, step over the body and head for 132.

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  149

  “Well done!” exclaims Caligula. “Now let’s see this friend of yours who wants my autograph.”

  With which he stands up and walks before you through the door to where Cassius and his men are waiting.

  You are about to hurry after him when a gentle hand touches your arm. You turn to find yourself looking into the wild eyes of the Sibyl.

  “Well done,” she says. “You’ve succeeded against all odds in making sure the monster is assassinated.”

  “Yes, well,” you say, trying to shake off her hand, “if you’ll excuse me I’d just like to get in there and make sure they do the job properly, maybe give them a hand if you know what I mean, help them hack him to bits - can’t have too many involved in a job like that.”

  The Sibyl smiles. “My, but you’ve grown bloodthirsty since I met you first. I’m not sure Ancient Rome has been very good for you. Fortunately you’ll forget everything you’ve experienced as soon as you return to your own time.”

  There is a dreadful scream from behind the closed door.

  “Well,” says the Sibyl, “it looks as if Cassius and Cornelius didn’t need your help after all. Caligula is dead and you have played a vital part in bringing that about. I know you would have liked to have done the job yourself, but I’m afraid it’s time for you to get back to where I found you.” She takes out her communicator and whispers, “One to beam back.” Then she looks at you and smiles again. “Sic friatur crustum dulce.”

  “What’s that mean?” you call out as the world dissolves around you.

  But the Mercury Phone has already vanished from your ear and there’s no answer as you reappear at 160

  Please select an option from the previous page.

  150

  A small man in a Greek tunic steps in front of you as you scurry through the archway. At once you start scrabbling for a weapon, but he gives you an exasperated look. “The butch ones are always the worst, heaven help us!” he exclaims. “Don’t you know the fighting’s over when you come through this arch - one way or another.”

  “Just let me past!” you growl, determined to get away from this lethal arena as quickly as possible.

  “All in good time,” the little man tells you, not at all put out by your tone. “The Senator’s made you a free person of the city and since he has his authority direct from our brand new Emperor Titus, you can go anywhere you wish. But I suspect you’re a stranger here - am I right?”

  Bene credas, you think, trying your hand at a little of the local Latin lingo, you’d better believe it! You’re about as much a stranger here as it’s possible to be. But aloud you only say, “Yes, I am.”

  “In that case,” the little man smiles, “you’ll need a map to find your way around. And you’ll also need a few denarii to oil the wheels of commerce.” With which he hands you a large leather pouch that jingles pleasantly.

  You take the pouch hesitantly. “Who are you?” you ask, frowning.

  “The Senator’s chief slave,” he tells you cheerfully, stepping to one side to let you pass.

  You walk along an enclosed tunnel that takes you outside the circus arena, then stop to take stock of your situation. Something obviously went wrong with your trip through time. You were supposed to land in Rome with the Sibyl who would brief you on how to stop Caligula’s parents getting together. You were certainly not supposed to land in the middle of the Roman Games.

  You stare thoughtfully up at the cloudless sky. Obviously your most important task now is to find the Sibyl otherwise you’re going to be stuck in Ancient Rome forever. But where in this great city is the Sibyl likely to be?

  Quickly you open the purse and unroll the parchment map inside. The heading catches your eye at once:

  POMPEII.

  You blink. Was that trip ever a monumental foul-up! You didn’t even land in Rome where you were supposed to. You landed in another city altogether - Pompey!

  Pompey? You frown as a memory tickles the edge of your mind. You reach for your copy of the Brief Guide to Ancient Rome. The entry under ‘Pompey’ confirms your immediate suspicions. Pompey was the Roman city on the Tyrrhenian Coast that was destroyed completely when the volcano Vesuvius erupted on the afternoon of 24th of August, 79 a.d.


  But of course this can’t be 79 a.d. since that’s long after Caligula died. The Sibyl said she was taking you back to Rome before he was born.

  Except she did make a mess of moving you in space since you aren’t in Rome but in Pompey instead. So maybe she screwed up moving you in time as well.

  A sudden thought occurs to you. The Senator’s chief slave mentioned something about a brand-new Emperor Titus. Quickly you look him up in the Brief Guide. Titus became Emperor in July 79 a.d when Vespasian died and only ruled until 81 a.d. If he’s brand-new now, that could mean ...

  You grab the elbow of a passer-by. “Excuse me,” you say urgently. “What date is this?”

  “The 24th of August,” he tells you pleasantly.

  “What year? What year?” you demand, half screaming.

  He looks at you suspiciously, then tells you only a month has passed since the new Emperor Titus ascended the throne, which is the way most people worked their dates in Ancient Rome. Fortunately your Mercury Phone translates it into the more modern usage. “The year is 79 a.d.” it crackles in your ear.

 

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