#Selfie

by Cambria Hebert

  I abandoned my hair, laptop, and chair. I didn’t rush over because I was afraid I’d scare her, but I was totally wanting to smoosh her little face.

  Rimmel was holding a Chihuahua puppy, and she couldn’t be more than two pounds.

  “Hi,” I crooned to her. Now let it be known, I might not be dedicating my career and part of my life to animals, but I did have a soft spot for them. I’d grown up with big, slobbery dogs and cats my brother’s had to climb trees to get down.

  And yes, they were the reasons the poor cats were in the trees. (Note to cats everywhere: hiding in trees will not keep little boys away. It will only make them into monkeys.)

  I’d never had such a tiny little thing, though. “Can I hold her?” I whispered, like my full voice would be too much.

  “Of course!” Rimmel smiled and held out her hands. The puppy was so little she fit in both Rimmel’s hands.

  I picked her up and cuddled her against my chest. “Aww,” I crooned at her. “Aren’t you just the cutest thing ever?”

  Her little body was trembling a bit, and she climbed up my chest a little farther. Her ears were bigger than her head and had long wisps of hair flying off them in all different directions. She was the color of wheat, with brown eyes and a pink nose. She was fluffy and tiny and wiggly.

  Basically, this puppy was everything a little heart stealer should be.

  Against my arm, I felt her little tail wiggle, and I laughed. She looked up at me and licked my chin.

  My heart turned over. The sadness I’d been plagued with for weeks suddenly seemed a little lighter. My mood a little brighter.

  I carried the puppy over to my bed and sat down. When I spread my legs and put the little girl down on the comforter, she sniffed around and tripped over a wrinkle in the fabric.

  Laughing, I played with the hair on her ears. She had puppy breath and a little fat belly.

  “What’s her name?” I asked Rim.

  “Doesn’t have one yet,” Rimmel replied, coming over to pet her. “She just came to the shelter today.”

  “How could anyone drop such a precious little thing off at a shelter?” I asked.

  The puppy grabbed hold of the hem of my T-shirt and started tugging. Rimmel and I both laughed at her valiant yet very tiny efforts.

  “Someone found her on the side of the road. They didn’t know where else to bring her but then remembered the shelter from all the publicity the fundraiser generated.”

  I blinked back tears. Gah, I was an emotional disaster. Maybe I was PMSing. Lord, I hoped so. I couldn’t be this screwed up. Yet the thought of this tiny little baby roaming the street alone and hungry totally wrecked me.

  “Thank God you took her in!” I proclaimed as the pup gave up on my shirt and curled up right against my leg.

  “Well, the shelter really is full, but we would never turn away an animal that needed help.”

  “How old is she?” I asked, stroking her light-colored, soft fur.

  “Best we can determine, she’s about twelve weeks old. So really very young.” Rimmel got up and rummaged around in her bag while she talked. A few seconds later, she pulled out two small bowls, one for dog food and the other for water, and a big white pad. It was a training pad for the puppy to pee on.

  “So what happens to her now?” I asked.

  Rimmel shrugged. “She’ll stay at the shelter until she’s adopted.”

  “In that cold shelter all alone?” I gasped.

  Rimmel laughed. “Well, we do have heat.”

  I picked up the fuzzy blanket I used when I studied and tucked it around her. “She can hang out with us,” I suggested.

  “Yeah, I hoped you wouldn’t mind. I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving her there either.”

  “No one will even know she’s in here she’s so tiny.”

  Rimmel nodded. “But not very long. She needs a good home.”

  I nodded. “I can stay here with her tonight, watch over her.”

  Rimmel gave me a look, kind of a cross between suspicion and worry. “You don’t want to go out?”

  I shrugged and looked back down to the puppy.

  “What’s going on, Ivy?”

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “You’ve been sort of withdrawn for weeks, since we got home from Florida actually. You seem a little down.”

  Of course she noticed. We shared this room. She saw me more than anyone else. And I’d been hiding out in the room a lot more than normal.

  I shrugged. “School’s just been busy.”

  “School is always busy.”

  Rimmel moved across the room and sat on the bed beside me. “I’ve been a bad friend.”

  My eyes shot up to hers. “What?”

  Rimmel wasn’t a bad friend. If anyone knew what a bad friend was, I did.

  “So much has been going on. I got caught up in my own problems, my own issues and Romeo’s, too. I haven’t been here for you. I never really asked you…”

  “Asked me what?” I pressed.

  “Are you okay? I mean, after everything with Zach…” Her voice trailed away timidly.

  My stomach twisted.

  “I know after what he did—”

  “You mean what I did?” I asked, not willing to let myself off the hook. “I slept with him. I gave him access to this room, to your stuff. And because of me, you almost got thrown out of college. You were attacked. Romeo broke his arm.”

  “Zach being a complete psycho is not your fault.”

  “Maybe not,” I allowed, “but I didn’t help things.”

  “The way I see it, you were a victim just like the rest of us,” Rimmel said passionately.

  I smiled. “You’re a good friend. You give me a lot of credit I don’t deserve.”

  “Why are you being so hard on yourself? Is there more to this than just Zach?”

  The puppy chose that moment to get up and start licking my hand. I giggled and started petting her.

  Rimmel smiled.

  It dawned on me. “You brought this puppy home for me. You knew I couldn’t resist something this cute.”

  “No one can resist a little puppy,” Rim agreed.

  “Is she really even a shelter dog?”

  Rimmel nodded. “She really is. She really was found on the street today. It’s just, when I saw her… I thought of you. I knew she’d make you smile.”

  I reached out and hugged her with one arm since the puppy was still between us. “Thank you.” I sat back and looked at the light-colored Chi. “If she were mine, I’d call her Prada.”

  Rimmel laughed. “Only you would name a dog after a designer.”

  “Hey, they make some good bags,” I admonished. “And besides, she’s trendy. I can tell already.”

  Rimmel nodded once. “Prada it is.”

  “We can’t name her,” I protested.

  “Sure we can. We gotta call her something. I can put her name on the tag on her cage at the shelter. Maybe whoever adopts her will keep it.”

  “What do you think about that, Prada?” I crooned.

  She tripped on the blanket again and fell over. I rubbed her tummy and we laughed.

  “You know you can talk to me anytime about anything, right?” Rimmel said. “Even Zach. No one blames you for anything he did.”

  “No one knows,” I scoffed. Then I paused. “Did you…?”

  She shook her head adamantly. “I didn’t tell anyone. Romeo knows, of course, because he was part of the investigation his father launched on my laptop. But no one else.”

  I let out a relieved sigh. “I don’t want anyone to know. I’m so embarrassed. I’ve been making some really bad choices lately. I can only imagine what Romeo thinks of me.” I cringed. I know people always say not to care about what others think of you, but that isn’t always easy. A girl wants her friends to like and respect her.

  Rimmel’s hand covered mine. “I promise you. Romeo doesn’t think badly about you. He’s actually noticed a change. I think he’s pro
ud of you.”

  “Really?” I don’t know why that meant so much to me, but it did. I know Romeo was just a guy like everyone else. He wasn’t really the big celebrity everyone made him out to be. He was a good guy. A nice guy. And he took really good care of Rimmel.

  However, he was sort of the alpha of our group, the leader. This past year, we’d really formed a tight group of friendship. Sure, Braeden and I were at each other’s throats all the time. Missy kind of fell off the map when her relationship with Braeden went south…

  I saw a pattern here. Braeden was like dynamite to all relationships he’s involved in.

  Wasn’t that an interesting realization?

  But even through it all, I knew my friends would be there if I needed them. Especially Romeo and Rimmel. They were solid.

  Rimmel nodded sagely. “He even told Trent when he asked about you.”

  “Trent asked about me?” I asked curiously. It was always flattering when a guy asked about you.

  Prada was up dancing around on the bed again, so Rimmel lifted her down and put her on the training pad and near her food. I watched her maneuver around. She sniffed at everything and seemed curious of everything her nose touched.

  “He did. I couldn’t help but notice he seemed pretty interested at breakfast the other day.”

  As much as I wanted to deny it, maybe Trent did seem interested in me. I groaned. “Me and guys aren’t a very good idea.”

  “You just need to find the right one.”

  “And you think Trent is the right one?” I asked. I couldn’t help but think about Braeden.

  I told myself to shut it.

  “Could be.” Rim smiled. “He’s sweet, good-looking, and he seems to really be into you.”

  “Yeah,” I echoed. “Maybe. But wasn’t the whole idea to set him up with Missy?”

  Rimmel didn’t seem bothered. “Yeah, but it didn’t work out that way. Missy doesn’t seem interested in Trent at all.”

  You have no idea.

  Before I decided to change the path I was on, to stop making choices that might come back to bite me later, I would have jumped on Rimmel’s idea. I would have thought the best way to get over someone I couldn’t and shouldn’t want was by getting into something with someone else, especially if that someone was interested in me.

  However, I was doing things different now. Better.

  That didn’t necessarily mean Trent wasn’t someone I could spend time with. But he wasn’t someone I was going to jump into bed with. He wasn’t someone I was going to get drunk with, and he most definitely was not a one-night stand.

  Maybe I could be into him. He did make me laugh, and he was so sweet when I cut my foot at the beach.

  After Braeden jumped over the railing to make sure you were okay.

  I shook my head, trying to clear the thought.

  Rimmel frowned. “I don’t mean to push. If it’s too soon after what happened with Zach…”

  “You’re not pushing. You’re just being a friend.” And I was a liar. She had no idea I’d been with Braeden.

  Of course, it wasn’t all about him. I was still haunted by Zach. Still so ashamed. Did that make me half a liar?

  Half a liar was better than a full liar.

  Right?

  “So what do you say? Screamerz?” Rimmel asked, hope in her eyes.

  I laughed. “Since when did you want to go out and me want to stay in?”

  She grinned and pushed up her glasses. “Maybe it’s a full moon.”

  I slid off the bed and onto the floor next to Prada. She romped over to me, and I started petting her again. As I moved my hand, she tried to chew my fingers. Her teeth were so tiny it didn’t even hurt.

  “Prada can stay here. I’ll call Romeo and ask him to bring Murphy’s crate we use when he goes to the vet. We can line it with a blanket and she can sleep while we’re gone.”

  “I don’t know,” I hedged. “She might get lonely.”

  Rimmel smiled. “She’ll sleep. Puppies sleep a lot. She’ll be tired out by us soon.”

  When I didn’t say anything, Rimmel sighed. “I can take her to Romeo’s? She can stay at the house with Murphy. I can take her back to the shelter tomorrow.”

  “No,” I said quickly. I wasn’t ready to let this little bundle of cuteness go yet. “If you think she’ll be okay here.”

  “I really do.”

  “Okay. I’ll come out. But only for a while. Then I’ll come back and take care of Prada.”

  “I’d planned on staying at Romeo’s tonight.” Rimmel chewed her lower lip, seeming conflicted.

  She always stayed with him on the weekends. I never expected her to sleep here. “I promise I’ll take care of her.”

  “I know you will,” Rimmel agreed. “Now, I better go shower and pick out something to wear.”

  “I’ll braid your hair,” I offered.

  “You know I’d be a hot mess if it weren’t for you, right?” she said as she gathered up all her shower stuff.

  “Rimmel?” I called before she could leave. “Thanks. For bringing home Prada, for cheering me up, and for just being here.”

  “Anytime.” She smiled and closed the door quietly behind her.

  Prada was dragging around my fuzzy slipper, which was twice as big as her, and acting like she was gonna do some damage. I laughed and went back to finishing my half-done hair.

  When it was done, I played with the puppy some more and then put on my makeup. The polka dot eye makeup wasn’t as time consuming as I thought it would be. And it turned out really awesome. The dots accented my eyes and seemed to arise out of the smoky-gray shadow at the corners. On the inner corner, I put something shimmering and light, just enough to catch the light. I kept the rest of my face fairly simple and then slid on some pale-pink lipstick.

  When Rimmel came back from her shower, we talked clothes, and I decided to wear a pair of mint-colored skinny jeans—it was spring after all—and a simple white tank top. Over the tank, I layered a big, chunky necklace with various strands of silver chains, turquoise-colored beads, and a couple white, flirty feathers.

  Since it still got cool at night, I figured I could get away with a pair of boots, so I dug around until I found a pair of grey boots with big wedge heels. They would be more comfortable to dance in than stilettos, and since I didn’t want to irritate the cut that was almost healed on the bottom of my foot, I figured it was a win-win.

  “You’re gonna freeze in that tank top!” Rimmel said when she saw what I was wearing.

  “Nah. I’ll wear a sweater until we get inside,” I replied and pulled out a chunky grey knit cardigan.

  “Well, for someone who wanted to stay in, you sure look hot.”

  I smiled. “Just being me.”

  “How about you be you over here with me and a brush?”

  I laughed, and Rimmel held Prada while I braided both sides of her hair back in a loose French braid and then twisted the ends up into a knot at the base of her head. After pulling out a few loose pieces around her face, I helped her pick out a pair of maroon-colored leggings and a flowy, loose top in a black-and-white chevron pattern. The only necklace she ever wore was a gold cameo pendant that belonged to her mother and the gold bracelet Romeo gave her for Christmas.

  But it worked and she looked great.

  A few minutes later, Romeo knocked on the door and Rimmel ushered him inside quickly.

  “What’s the rush, smalls?” he asked as she yanked him inside and shut the door.

  He drew up short when he saw me on the floor amongst a bunch of makeshift toys and a little puppy in the center. He laughed. “This is what you needed Murphy’s carrier for?”

  Prada glanced at Romeo and wagged her little tail. Her entire butt wiggled with the action. She pounced on his shoe, and I laughed because it was literally like five times the size of her body.

  He set down the carrier and reached for Rim.

  He lifted her off the ground without any effort and brought her up to his e
ye level. “Smalls, are you gonna be bringing home every animal that tugs at your heart?”

  She stuck out her chin. “And what if I do?”

  I couldn’t help but watch them. They had like an epic love story. Just watching them look at each other was captivating.

  Romeo chuckled. “Then I guess I’m gonna have to buy a farm with a whole lot of land.”

  “You’d do that?”

  “I’d do anything for you, baby. You know that.”

  I turned away. Their story was beautiful, but it seemed unattainable for someone like me.

  Rimmel whispered that she loved him, and then in a louder voice, she said, “Well, I didn’t adopt Prada. I just smuggled her in so she could meet Ivy. I didn’t want to leave her all alone at the shelter.”

  “Yes, I’m sure the fifty other animals there would have made her feel lonely,” Romeo cracked and set Rim down.

  “She sure makes me feel less lonely.”

  Silence enveloped the room, and I glanced up. Romeo and Rimmel were both staring at me. “Did I say that out loud?” I asked, feeling my cheeks heat.

  “Yep,” Romeo answered. “But we won’t tell.”

  I cleared my throat and reached for the carrier. It was made of sturdy, thick plastic with a black handle on top. It had good-sized vents on the sides and a black iron door on the front.

  “Is this too small?” I worried.

  “No, it’s a good size for her. She’s so small she needs a space that’s contained. It will give her a sense of security.”

  I nodded. It made sense. My blanket was too big to put inside the carrier, so I used one of my clean, soft towels I used for showering instead. After that, I put one of my fuzzy socks Prada had found and was dragging around inside as well.

  I tucked the carrier beneath my desk, but not too far back so she wouldn’t be able to see. Then I clicked on my desk lamp so it wouldn’t be dark.

  Rimmel waited and watched patiently as I set up a little space for our guest. Even Romeo didn’t seem to mind my fussing. Of course, he was probably used to it with Murphy.

  “Ready?” Romeo asked us after we both cuddled the dog again and tucked her inside the carrier.

  “I think so,” I said.

  Rimmel laughed. “She’ll be okay. I promise.”

  I peeked inside before we left, and she was already curled up sleeping with her tiny head pillowed on my sock.