#Selfie

by Cambria Hebert

  I’d never been that drunk before, so drunk I couldn’t remember what happened. So drunk I just let someone like him come back to my room and had sex with him.

  Inside my bag, my phone started ringing. Pulling it out, I looked at the screen. It was my brother. I hit the ignore button and tossed it back inside. I didn’t want to talk to him right now either. He’d know something was off and then he’d demand to know what it was.

  The last thing I wanted to do was explain to my brother about everything that had been going on in my life.

  Prada barked, and I laughed. “You silly girl!” I told her and sat down in the grass. When she attacked my shoe, I took it off and let her “chew” it. I thought about the other night when she attacked Braeden’s.

  He didn’t want me to go out with Trent. And the way he kissed me…

  I forced the thoughts away.

  Braeden and I were over, over before we even got started. I was going to come clean to Missy and hope she could forgive me. Then I was going to go out with Trent and give him a chance. He might not make me feel so turned inside-out like Braeden, but maybe that was a good thing.

  After a while, I picked Prada up and went back to the room. When we got there, she ate and burrowed in my bed to nap. I worked on some homework and then lay down with some reading I was supposed to do.

  It was boring and I fell asleep.

  I dreamt about Braeden. About the words he whispered that night at the beach. I dreamt of the stars and the waves, and of his hands. When I woke up, my hands were sweaty and my breasts felt tender. How could just the memory of him arouse me?

  I shook off the dream as best I could and realized the room was dark. I hadn’t meant to sleep so long; I was supposed to be at Romeo’s. I jumped up and grabbed a bag to throw in some clothes, shower stuff, and everything else I’d need for class the next morning.

  When I was done, I packed up Prada’s little things and texted Rimmel that I’d be there in just a few minutes.

  As I drove, it was far too easy to slip back into thoughts of the dream I had. The sky was dark, and my headlights created the only illumination on the road. Occasionally, I passed another car, but when I turned off the main road and into the neighborhood I drove through to get to Romeo’s, there were even less cars, making me feel like I was alone.

  I wondered how long Missy would be at practice tonight and if I would have enough guts to come clean when she arrived. I was glad Rimmel and I would have some time alone before Missy came, because I needed to talk to someone and I knew she would understand.

  Well, maybe not understand, but she wouldn’t judge me.

  I was almost to Romeo’s when Prada made a little noise. She was in the carrier that was Murphy’s. I managed to smuggle it out of the dorm without anyone seeing. I figured it would be comforting for her to sleep in since we were going to be somewhere she wasn’t familiar with.

  The carrier was on the passenger-side floor of the car. I glanced down and told her we were almost there.

  When I looked back up, something large and fast darted out from the bushes on the side of the road.

  I screamed and jerked the wheel, trying to avoid whatever it was.

  But my attempts were futile.

  AKA an epic failure.

  Something hard slammed into the front end of my car. I screamed on impact. The crunching sound of metal was deafening, and I slammed on the brakes. The car fishtailed wildly, then came to a stop.

  My hands griped the steering wheel so hard my knuckles were white. My body was so tense it hurt and my lungs gasped for air like I’d just been strangled.

  After a few moments of me just sitting there in shock, I forced my fingers to release the wheel. I tried to reach for my phone, but I was trapped against the seat. I fumbled for the seatbelt release and hit it; my body sagged forward and my shoulder screamed in relief. I had no idea it locked up so tightly on me.

  I made sure Prada was okay, lifting the carrier to the passenger seat and turning on the overhead light inside the car. She was okay, and I exhaled in relief. It was a good thing she’d been in this protective case.

  Once the original shock of the accident passed, I was able to think more clearly. I realized I was sitting on the side of a darkened road, and I was alone. I could get out and walk over the little bridge I’d just gone over and knock on someone’s door.

  Or I could just use my cell.

  I liked that idea better.

  I was close to Romeo’s. I could just call Rimmel. I’d let her know what happened and… Wait. My car was still running. I could just drive there.

  But then I remembered. I hit something.

  Or rather something hit me.

  My brain was slow and scrambled, and I looked out the windshield to the area surrounding my car. What had I hit?

  Was someone injured? Did they need help?

  Oh my God, what if they were dead?

  I swallowed back my panic as my eyes searched. I didn’t see another car or hear anyone yelling for help.

  But then I saw something.

  A flickering shadow against the bright beams of my headlights. It wasn’t quite in the center, but more on the edge of the light. Yet once I looked upon it, it was impossible to look away.

  I unlatched my door and got out on unsteady legs. Clutching my phone in my hand, I moved around the front of the car, staring, hearing the sounds of a struggle.

  Then I saw the blood.

  And I started to cry.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Braeden

  I laughed when I pulled up to Romeo’s place.

  His lime-green Hellcat was parked right in its place, looking as spotless as ever.

  It probably killed him to leave that car here for Rim to drive. He was probably sweating through his shirt worrying about what she was gonna do to it while he was gone.

  But he left it anyway.

  Said a lot about him and how he felt for Rim.

  I sent him a text with a pic of the car.

  YOU’RE WHIPPED.

  A few seconds later, he replied.

  SCREW YOU.

  I laughed and walked up to the red front door. It swung open before I could knock. “Hey, tutor girl.”

  “Hey, Braeden. Thanks for coming over.”

  “Why don’t ya call Rome? Tell him ya wrecked the Cat. I wanna see what he does.” I grinned and rubbed my hands together.

  Rimmel smacked me in the ribs. “I will not! You’re mean.”

  “You love me,” I told her and tugged her ponytail.

  “Yes, I do.”

  “Why?” I asked abruptly. The words came right out, like diarrhea.

  Rimmel stopped on her way to the kitchen and glanced over her shoulder at me. She was wearing a pair of sweatpants that were so big I was surprised they stayed up. On her feet were a pair of white furry-looking slippers, her hair was in a crooked ponytail, and of course, she was wearing Rome’s hoodie.

  “I got lots of reasons,” she replied.

  “Well, I am impossibly good-looking,” I said, trying to make light of the question.

  Rimmel snorted and went on into the kitchen. I followed along behind her. “I’m not sure if that’s a good thing.”

  “Say what?”

  She held out a soda and I nodded. The can came flying at my head, and I snatched it out of the air.

  “You trying to deform all of this?” I asked, waving to my face.

  “Sometimes I think you’re too good-looking for your own good.”

  “You hitting on me?” I teased. “I’m gonna have to call Rome.” I pulled out my phone, and she snatched it away and set it on the counter.

  “Your jokes won’t make me forget the question.”

  “Will beer?”

  She uncapped a water and took a sip. “I assume you’re asking because you somehow got it in your head you aren’t lovable.”

  “Oh, I know I am,” I cracked. But then I added, “I just wonder how long it will take for my lovable-n
ess to fade.”

  Rimmel set the water aside and crossed her arms over her chest. Murphy came in the room and slid around my legs before going over and doing the same to Rimmel.

  “I talked to your mom after dinner the other night.”

  “Romeo told me.” I popped the top to the soda and took a long sip. The carbonation burned my throat as I gulped it.

  “I’m sure it’s really hard to talk about, so we don’t have to.”

  “If you got questions, sis, I got answers.”

  “I do have one,” she said.

  I braced myself. “Shoot.”

  “Do you think I love easily?”

  I heard the question, but it took a minute for me to understand. Why would she ask me that?

  I cleared my throat. “Honestly, after everything I’ve learned about you, I don’t. Sometimes I’m surprised as hell you let Rome in.”

  “But he isn’t the only one I let in.”

  I blinked.

  “I let you in, too.”

  I was starting to see where she was going with this.

  “I’ve been hurt a lot in my life, B. I’ve been lied to, used, taken advantage of. I’ve been attacked and made fun of… You know.”

  “Yeah.” My voice was low. “I do know.” And it pissed me off to no end.

  “I planned to live my whole life alone. With animals and my career. I never wanted to let anyone in. I vowed I wouldn’t. But then Romeo came along. And you know that wasn’t easy either.”

  “Rim—”

  She held up her hand. I shut my mouth.

  “And then there was you. Charming, obnoxious, and frankly, a dog.”

  “You do like dogs.”

  “I have a cat,” she pointed out.

  I laughed.

  “But that’s not all you are. It isn’t who you are. You might not know it, but underneath your temper—which I finally understand by the way—underneath your jokes and your charm… you’re real. You’re soft, and I think you feel way more than most people do.”

  I set down my soda. I felt like those glasses of hers had X-ray vision. I didn’t like it. It made me uncomfortable.

  “I think you know me letting anyone in, me loving anyone is a pretty big deal. But yet here you are. My BBFL. Big brother for life. I’m pretty sure for life implies your lovable-ness will never go away.”

  “But what if it does?” I whispered.

  “What if it doesn’t?”

  “You know our talks are a lot different than mine and Rome’s.”

  A smile tugged at her mouth and her head tilted. “In what way?”

  I shrugged. “We usually hit each other.”

  She snorted and pulled her arm up to make a muscle. “You don’t wanna take this on.”

  I pulled her into a hug. “You sure know how to make a guy feel better.”

  Her laugh was muffled against my shirt. The doorbell rang, and I stiffened. She pulled back. “I ordered Chinese takeout. I’ll go pay.”

  I followed her to the door and then made her move back so I could answer it. It was a Chinese dude with some boxes and bags. Rimmel muttered something beneath her breath about me being an idiot and pushed me away so she could pay and smile politely at the man.

  “Thank you!” she said.

  He smiled at her. I slammed the door in his face.

  “You have very bad manners,” she told me.

  Wasn’t the first time I heard that.

  “You hungry?” she called.

  “You know I am.”

  “I got enough for all of us.”

  I remembered her telling Ivy she’d see her tonight. “You know, I’m not that hungry after all. Think I’m gonna go.”

  Rimmel set down the food and turned to face me. Her hands went on her hips and she glared at me. “You’re eating. Wash your hands.”

  “You bossing me?”

  “You disobeying?”

  I went and washed my hands. When I came back out, she smiled sweetly and handed over all the food. “Let’s eat in the living room, and you can tell me what’s going on with you and Ivy.”

  I made a choking sound and felt my eyes nearly fall out of my head. “What makes you think there’s something going on?”

  She just smiled and patted my chest. Then she disappeared into the bathroom to wash her hands.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Ivy

  Blood and tears stained my vision.

  Pain was in the air.

  My hands shook uncontrollably.

  I dialed the phone.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Braeden

  “Is that my phone?” Rimmel called out from the bathroom, the running water muffling her voice slightly.

  “Yeah,” I yelled back.

  “Pick it up! It’s probably Romeo.”

  I snatched the cell off the table beside the couch and glanced down at the screen. It wasn’t Rome. And that meant it probably didn’t matter if I answered it or not.

  But I did anyway.

  The second I silenced the ring and put it up to my ear, I anticipated hearing her voice. I tried not to think too much about that. Before I could even muster a hello or what do you want, she started talking. Words rushed out of her mouth so fast and wobbly my hand tightened around the phone.

  “Rimmel? Thank God you picked up. It’s bad, really bad,” Ivy said, and her voice caught on nearly every other word.

  “What the hell is going on?” I practically growled. Tension coiled inside me so tightly I was afraid a piece of me might snap.

  “B-Braeden?” Her voice wobbled again. I heard the distinct sound of tears there.

  “Are you crying?” I demanded. I started pacing, not even thinking about it, but moving quickly around the room and toward the door.

  “Y-y-yes.” She sniffed.

  “Where are you?” I ground out. “Did someone hurt you?”

  “Don’t yell at me,” she said pathetically.

  That’s when I knew she was really upset. Usually, when she thought I was yelling, she would yell back.

  Pinching the bridge of my nose with my forefinger and thumb, I pulled in a breath. “I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just worried. Please tell me what’s going on.”

  A sob broke over the line, and I rushed to snatch my keys off the coffee table. Rimmel was standing beside the couch with a worried expression on her face.

  “I was on my way over. It came out of nowhere.” Her voice shook. “I didn’t mean to hit it.”

  Okay, she was in an accident. She might be hurt. I needed to get there. I flung open the door and rushed outside.

  Behind me, Rimmel was calling my name and ran out behind me.

  I stopped and turned. “Stay here. I’ll be back.”

  “What’s going on?”

  “Ivy just needs some help.”

  “I can—”

  “No,” I said harshly. “I’ll be back.”

  My tone drew her up short. I’d never talked to her like that before. I hadn’t meant to, but I was going out of my damn mind.

  “Where are you?” I asked Ivy as I climbed into the truck and slammed the door.

  “A few blocks away. I just came over that small bridge,” she said, hollow, like she was focused on something else. She started crying again. The sounds of her soft sniffles had me pressing down on the gas and tearing out of the driveway and up the street.

  I knew where she was. She was by Old River Crossing. It was a small bridge, not even a quarter mile long, that drove over Old River that ran through town.

  “Ivy, are you hurt?” I tore around the corner and down the next street. I was just two blocks away now. I’d be there in seconds.

  “What?” She was totally distracted. “I-I’m not sure.”

  My tires squealed when I took the next turn, and the sound of the V8 under my hood roared through the darkness. I hadn’t seen any other cars on the road. It was late, but not so late that other people wouldn’t be out. I knew I should slow down, exercise som
e caution, but it was physically impossible.

  She needed me.

  I was going to get there.

  Up ahead, a car on the side of the road came into view. It was parked crookedly, and the driver’s door was wide open. The headlights were on, and I could see her outline standing in the dark, beside her car.

  What the fuck was she doing standing there in the dark on the side of the road by herself?

  My God, this woman was going to put me in an early grave.

  Slamming on the brakes, I skidded to a stop just behind her little car. I hit the END CALL button on the phone and tossed it on the seat. The truck was left running when I leapt out and rushed around the side.

  “Ivy!”

  “Braeden,” she sobbed and rushed toward me. Her phone was still clutched at her ear like she didn’t realize we could talk without it.

  The second she was close enough, she wrapped her arms around my waist and pressed against me as close as she could. Her body was shaking like a delicate leaf in a windstorm.

  “Hey,” I murmured. Some of my fear she was seriously injured cleared because she was finally in my arms. That had been the longest short drive of my life.

  “What happened?” I rubbed her back and noted she wasn’t wearing a jacket. It was spring, but when the sun went down, it got cold. How long had she been out here? She was probably freezing.

  She forced her head back and looked up at me with a tear-streaked face. With the harsh light from my headlights, she looked like a ghost. “It’s suffering. It’s all my fault.” Her voice rose and hysteria started to creep in.

  I brushed back the blond strands that had gotten stuck in her tears and held her face so I could look at her. “What’s suffering?”

  She drew in a breath and wrapped her hand around mine. I let her lead me around the front of the car, but she didn’t have to point out what I was supposed to see. My eyes went right to it.

  There on the side of the road, where the pavement turned to loose gravel and then gave way to grass, was a large deer.

  “It came out of nowhere. I tried to stop. I tried to swerve.” She started crying, burying her face in her hands.

  “It’s okay.” I tried to pry her hands away.