The Wolf Within

by M. J. Scott

  “Nope.”

  “Then we’ll talk outside,” Ani said.

  “Whatever.” I pushed the double doors open and barged through. Behind me the room exploded into excited conversation. Seemed as though I’d livened up the party.

  I didn’t stop until I reached the front door and stood gulping in fresh air, trying to beat down the anger burning inside me. Ani stood silently next to me.

  “Okay,” I said when I felt like I’d regained a little control. “Talk. Explain to me why you were just about to hand me over to Dan all wrapped up in a pretty little bow.”

  “We weren’t,” Ani said.

  My jaw dropped. Who did she think she was kidding? “Well, that’s what it felt like to me. Dan has no claim over me. And you have no right to give him one.”

  No one had the right to control me. No one claimed me. Claim. I hated the very word. It’s what Tate had said before he’d bitten me.

  I was never going to let anyone else think they had possession of me.

  “When it comes to the pack, I have the right to do anything I damn well please,” Ani snapped. She gripped the iron rail fronting the porch with enough force I was glad it wasn’t wood.

  Then again, if it had been wood, I could’ve ripped a piece off and gone back inside to whack Dan over the head with it. “What, you’re running some sort of white slavery ring now? Get a new wolf, hand them over to the first bidder?”

  “Oh grow up, Ashley,” Ani said. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “And whose fault is that exactly?”

  She made a frustrated noise but she didn’t really have a comeback. She’d spent the last week teaching me about pack etiquette but hadn’t mentioned anything about claims or courting. Talk about a set-up.

  “I didn’t think Dan would bring this up so soon. Any idiot can see you need some time.”

  “Dan’s not just any idiot. He’s in a class of his own.”

  She sighed. “When it comes to you, that appears to be true. He loves you, Ashley, and sooner or later you’re going to have to deal with that.”

  I leaned my head against one of the iron railings, wondering how to make her understand I was serious. “He sure has a strange way of showing it. And I have dealt with it. I told him to leave me the hell alone. And then he turns around and tries to put his brand on me or something.”

  “He was just asking for the right to court you.”

  “I don’t want to be courted.”

  “Then you can tell him that and at the end of the month, you can do whatever you want. But the claim has been called.”

  I looked up at the night sky, at the moon, still looking almost full, shining silver against the ribbons of clouds. The moon that seemed to be causing me nothing but grief. “Explain this claim thing to me. In short words.”

  “Wolves mate for life,” Ani said, boosting herself up onto the railing, legs dangling.

  I nodded. “Got that bit.”

  “And the males can get very territorial. People have been killed fighting over this sort of thing. So we came up with the claim. If someone calls claim, everyone else has to back off for however long. It saves a lot of hassle.”

  “It won’t save me a lot of hassle. I have no intention of getting back together with Dan—” I tried not to think too hard about the way he’d kissed me or about the pull of his scent “—he freaking turned me into a werewolf.”

  “To save your life.”

  I shrugged. We were going around in circles again. “So what happens if I don’t agree to this claim?”

  “Potentially a lot of jostling for your attention. We have quite a few single males at the moment. Do you really want to be besieged by men right now? Wouldn’t it be easier to agree? It’s not like Dan can make you date him.”

  She kind of had a point. The thought of dealing with men and sex—particularly strange men and sex, let alone werewolves and sex—was about as appealing as letting Tate kidnap me again. Dan, I could handle, kind of. I had a lot of practice at keeping him at arm’s length.

  “For one month? And I don’t have to actually date him?”

  “No dating. Nothing you don’t want to do.” She grinned at me.

  “Don’t look at me like that. I don’t want to do anything with Dan.” Except kick his butt all over the Retreat. Perhaps I should find out exactly how much stronger I was now I’d changed. Pounding on Dan might be more satisfying than abusing Ani and Sam’s gym equipment.

  Ani took a deep breath. “It’s your life.”

  “Nice of you to notice.”

  “So, we can go back inside and have a good time?”

  A good time? I didn’t know if that was what I’d call it. But I didn’t want to spoil the party. So I followed her back inside.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Dan still stood in the middle of the circle of wolves, looking like he wanted to do some butt kicking of his own. Well, tough.

  Sam stood beside him, talking quietly. The rest of the wolves chatted casually, trying to look like they weren’t all waiting to see what I’d do.

  As Ani and I approached the circle, the chatter died.

  Dan looked relieved to see me. I sent him an ‘I’ll deal with you later’ look and stopped about three feet away from him. Even that was too close. His wildness teased my nose and the fast rush of his pulse, telling me he was nervous or excited or horny or maybe all three, sounded like a crazed metronome in my ears.

  Ani whispered something in Sam’s ear and they made their way back to their chairs. An expectant hush fell over the room and Dan’s heartbeat sped up another notch.

  “Claim is called and heard,” Ani said. “Daniel Gibson, you have until the next moon.”

  Dan grinned with relief. I curled my hand into a fist but managed not to sock him. “Don’t get too cocky,” I hissed at him. “I haven’t agreed to cooperate with your stupid plans.”

  “I’ll just have to work on that, won’t I?” he replied, not bothering to hide his satisfaction.

  “Good luck with that.” I hightailed it back to my seat and watched, arms folded, as the pack discussed other business that meant very little to me, pretending not to notice all the curious stares I was receiving.

  It was enough to make me want to go out and bite someone, just to make sure that next month, there’d be someone else to take up everybody’s attention. Maybe I’d get lucky and someone else would do that for me.

  The thought jolted me a little. Did I really want somebody else to have to go through what I had, just to take the heat off me? No. I bit back a sigh, feeling exhausted.

  The official part of the evening went on for about another half hour then everyone broke out of the circle and back into the beer.

  The brunette I’d been sitting next to passed me a longneck. “Here, you look like you could use this.”

  “Thanks.” I’d moved to a bench near the back of the room where I could see everyone and no one could get behind me.

  “I’m Natalie,” she said, sitting beside me.

  “Ashley.” I chugged beer.

  “I figured that much.” She smiled. “So are you and Dan. . . .” She waggled her beer at me.

  “No.” It came out kind of abrupt and I felt a little guilty. Dan’s idiocy wasn’t her fault. Plus, I was stuck with the pack for at least a year. Trying to make some friends wouldn’t be a terrible idea. “We were kind of together once, but that was a long time ago.”

  She made a little ‘oh’ face then frowned. “And he really didn’t tell you about the claim?”

  “No. And he and I will be having a little chat about that later on.”

  She grinned. “You know, it’s kind of romantic, standing up, telling everyone he wants you. Makes a girl feel special.”

  “Oh yeah? How would you like it?

  “I liked it just fine,” she said with another grin. She stood as a tall guy wearing a bright blue shirt that matched his eyes came over to us. He bent and planted a kiss on her cheek. “Ash
ley, this is Ben, my husband.”

  Way to go with the foot in mouth, Keenan. “I take it you two met because of the pack?”

  They both smiled and Ben pulled Natalie closer against him. “Yep,” Ben said. “Love at first sight.”

  “Sweet.” I drained my beer, watching the crowd around us. There did seem to be an awful lot of couples and none of them were giving off bored couple body language. There were lots of little smiles and touches going on. All those checking in type gestures that let you know someone was on your side. I swallowed as a lump rose in my throat.

  Wolves mate for life. Maybe this was why.

  Natalie giggled as Ben whispered something in her ear, bringing my attention back to them. I summoned a smile as they laughed together.

  “So you and Dan, huh?” Ben said.

  “No.” I said flatly. “Just Dan being delusional.”

  “I’m not so sure about that,” Ben said.

  I frowned. “What do you mean? Dan and I aren’t dating. We’re long over.”

  Ben exchanged a look with Natalie. “No one’s told you?”

  My stomach tightened. What now? “Told me what?”

  He finished his own beer, looking at me speculatively. “Promise you’re not going to kill the messenger?”

  I could do that. After all, the one I really wanted to kill right now was Dan. “Scout’s honor.”

  “It’s just that you two . . . you kind of smell bonded.”

  I almost dropped my beer. “Excuse me?”

  “You’ve noticed, haven’t you? That Ani and Sam kind of smell the same?” Ben said, hooking his arm around Natalie’s shoulder.

  “I thought that was an Alpha thing.”

  “Partly. It’s also a mated thing. Like me and Nat.”

  “You’re telling me that Dan and I smell alike?”

  “From what I could tell in the circle, yes. It might be partly that he bit you.”

  I took a deep breath, trying to make sense of what he was telling me. Unfortunately it only proved his point. When I concentrated on what I was smelling, there were similarities in his and Natalie’s scents. Not just the pack smell but a unique note they shared, something warm and rich like steaming coffee, only not exactly. They didn’t smell like Ani and Sam, but they did smell alike.

  Just what I needed. Another fucking complication. “And if Dan and I do smell alike?”

  “Then your hormones might just have done the choosing for you. Pair bonds aren’t always logical. And if you’re looking for another male, they’re going to have problems with that. You smell taken.”

  “Fuck.” I looked around the room for Dan. He was loading up a plate at the buffet, smiling as he talked to the short blonde I’d seen when I’d first arrived. She was smiling back at him like he was God’s gift to wolfdom and I felt myself bristle slightly.

  “It doesn’t seem to be bothering her,” I said.

  Natalie shrugged. “That’s Petra. She’s been throwing herself at Dan since she joined the pack.”

  “Isn’t that a little rude if he’s just called claim on me?”

  “Well, you didn’t exactly jump for joy,” Ben pointed out. “She’s a persistent little thing. She probably figures she’s still got a chance after the month is up.”

  Oh, did she? Maybe I didn’t want Dan for myself but that didn’t mean I wanted him taking up with some miniature Barbie who wore pink heels and too much make-up. I looked at her again with narrowed eyes, something about her grated on my nerves.

  “Well, this has been . . . educational,” I said to Ben and Natalie. “But you’ll have to excuse me.”

  They nodded and smiled. “Maybe we can have dinner sometime, once you’ve adjusted to all this,” Natalie said, making a gesture that took in the whole room.

  I nodded. It actually sounded nice. Between my weird hours at work and Bug and all, I didn’t actually get a lot of girlfriend time. My best friend from college lived in California and the close friends I’d made at my old firm all worked stupid hours like me.

  Maybe the pack wasn’t such a terrible thing, I thought, as I worked my way through the crowd, pausing to say hello and be introduced when people stopped me. The noise level in the room continued to increase, someone had cranked up the music and put on an old Springsteen CD. Couples and singles started dancing in the middle of the circle.

  I had to say one thing for the pack, they knew how to have a good time.

  I thought of Jase, waiting back at the Alpha’s house and felt a twinge of guilt. He’d love all this.

  “A penny for your thoughts?” A too familiar voice asked behind me.

  It seemed Dan hadn’t waited for me to find him, he’d found me. “I was just thinking that it would be a shame to spoil this nice party by beating you up,” I said, turning to smile sweetly at him.

  “You’re mad.”

  I batted my eyelashes. “Why, Dan, you’re so perceptive.”

  He grimaced and I couldn’t help breathing in his scent, trying to see if I did smell like him. Problem was I couldn’t smell myself over all the wolves in the room. But his scent did seem more familiar to me.

  Damn. I wrinkled my nose. Was the scent more familiar because it was like mine? Was Ben right?

  Bonded?

  Shit.

  I didn’t want to think about the possibility. I wasn’t going to let stupid werewolf physiology run my life. I’d just buy stronger perfume and hope for the best.

  “What’s that face for?” Dan asked as I frowned harder.

  “Gee, Dan. What do you think I might be mad about?”

  He looked vaguely guilty for a moment. Then jerked his head toward the door. “Can we go somewhere and talk about it?”

  “Was that a request?” I arched an eyebrow at him. “You’re not just going to swing me up over your shoulder and carry me off like a caveman?”

  He rubbed his forehead for a moment then sighed. “I can if you want me too. But for now I’m just asking nicely.”

  He wasn’t getting away with it that easily. “Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you pulled caveman act number one.”

  His eyes narrowed, darker gray than silver for once. Stormy gray. “I didn’t plan it like this, it was just that—”

  “That?” I prompted.

  He blew out a breath. “Some of the guys were talking before you arrived. You know, guy talk. They said some things I didn’t like. I didn’t want them hassling you.”

  “So you decided to hassle me yourself. Why, Daniel, I’m touched.” I noticed Petra standing a few feet from us, looking annoyed. “Though, I’m not sure your friend there feels the same way.” I nodded in her direction, saw Dan follow my gesture with his eyes.

  He looked back at me, confusion on his face. “Petra? There’s nothing between Petra and me.”

  Sure, and I was happy being a werewolf. For a smart guy, he was batting for the moron major league tonight. “Sometimes I have to wonder about the Taskforce. I thought they only recruited the bright ones.”

  He shoved his hands in his pockets. “Look, can we just go and talk somewhere?”

  I considered him. We did need to talk—or rather, I needed to yell. But between the beer and the lingering energy from the moon and the fact that, despite my wishes and my determination to prove Ben wrong, Dan still smelled—and, if I was completely honest, looked—way too good, I wasn’t sure I trusted myself to be alone with him. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “Ash—”

  The fact that the pleading tone in his voice made me hesitate told me I definitely needed to leave before I did something stupid. “Tomorrow,” I said. “I’m tired, Dan. We can talk tomorrow.”

  ***

  One good thing. Apparently werewolves don’t get hangovers. In an attempt to fall asleep and not deal with everything happening to me, I’d made good friends with the contents of my Cuervo bottle after the pack meeting. It had helped a little—I’d slept eventually. And I didn’t have my normal post-tequila splitt
ing headache.

  I did have Dan knocking on my bedroom door just as I wandered out of the bathroom in my robe. I didn’t have to ask who it was. His scent announced him.

  “Just a minute,” I yelled, scrabbling for clothes. I needed more than thin silk between me and Dan. I shucked the robe, pulling on panties and a bra.

  Dan opened the door and walked straight in as I grabbed frantically for my robe . . . a little too slowly. His eyes flickered over my body, his dimple blinking to life for a second then his expression turned serious. I couldn’t help a perverse sense of irritation that he hadn’t looked longer.

  “What are you doing? I said just a minute,” I snapped.

  He shook his head. Just once. “We don’t have time. Get packed.”

  “What?” I was meant to stay at the retreat for a few more days until everyone was happy I wasn’t going to turn into a ravening beast or something. “What’s happened?”

  “Holiday’s over,” Dan said, face serious. “There’s been some murders.”

  My knees buckled and my robe slipped from suddenly numb fingers. “Who?”

  “No one you know.”

  Things swam around me for a moment then my vision cleared. As my panic receded, I fought the urge to pick up the vase on my dresser and fling it at Dan’s head. “You couldn’t start with that info?”

  He looked at me, puzzled. “What?”

  “You scared the crap out of me.”

  “Oh. Sorry.” His eyes were kind of glazed looking and I realized I was still in my underwear. And that the bra I’d grabbed was one of my skimpy lace ones.

  So maybe he wasn’t so indifferent.

  And maybe I didn’t want to think about that.

  “Turn around,” I squawked.

  “Huh? Right. Sorry.” He didn’t sound sorry. And his one-eighty didn’t exactly set land speed records.

  I started wriggling into the nearest clothes, trying not to blush. “Why rush back if the victims are no one we know?”

  Dan’s back stiffened. “Because they think it’s Tate that did it.”

  I sat back down on the bed with a squishy sort of thud. “Why?”

  “His MO. Three dead vampires. Drained.”