by Quil Carter
And that sense of happiness only grew when I felt his hand start to gently stroke and play with my hair. He was relaxing beside me. Maybe it was familiarity to what we’d done before, or perhaps just that physical contact. I wasn't sure, but this was important information. This was how I can calm someone down: physical touch.
We settled in and began watching the movie, and as it went on, Ryan continued to touch and play with my hair, even running his fingers down my neck occasionally. I felt soothed by it, relaxed and at ease, and found myself craving more as the movie went on. I’d never been one to enjoy physical touch, but tonight I believe I was learning just how calming it was. I… almost wasn’t angry at him anymore.
“This is how I know you’re not a bad person,” Ryan whispered, the movie over halfway done. I was leaned into him, my head on his shoulder and his arm tight around me. “Were you just acting that way because I hurt your feelings?”
My body stiffened at that comment, but I found my walls falling around me, the comfort and security I was feeling in his arms drawing out sensitivities I’d previously had locked away.
“Yeah,” I admitted quietly.
He picked up my cut hand, the quick wrapping of gauze still tight around it, and stroked the fabric gently with his finger. “I’m sorry, hun,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” Ryan then kissed my hair and rubbed my shoulder, his lips and his hands leaving behind a trail of heat, one that was joining the warmth enveloping my body… and my heart.
He was apologizing to me? I wasn’t expecting that… not at all.
It made me feel… like I was melting into him. And not only that, it made all the hatred and anger that I’d been cradling drip away and disappear into the dark abyss below me. After everything I’d done to him, never had I expected an actual apology, just a terrified teacher stammering and stumbling his way through our first date.
A rush of feelings took hold of me, ones that made my heart swell and my body crave more of him. He was so kind… so wonderful. He understood me, and even after all I’d done to him, he was willing to understand and apologize.
I think… I think I…
“I want you,” I suddenly whispered.
Ryan’s breath caught in his throat. I lifted my head from his shoulder and looked at him, and saw two large, shocked eyes, staring back at me. “I want you,” I said again, and his time I put a hand to his cheek and drew him to me for a kiss.
His lips were tight from surprise, but only moments after, Ryan’s entire body relaxed as we kissed. This time it was me who opened my lips, and he did the same.
My body flooded with a hot tingling sensation, and like it was water being directed into a funnel, it all gathered down to one particular place. There is no need to mention what place that was, or a need to comment on the tightness I soon was experiencing in my pants.
And when Ryan slid an arm over the small of my back and pulled me onto him, that feeling multiplied like a virus. We locked our lips again, this time with our tongues sliding and moving together in a rhythm fuelled on desire. I straddled him, and felt the hardness underneath his own pants.
We made out, the movie now forgotten behind us. I hadn’t thought that this lustful feeling could get any worse, but with each passing minute that I drank of this, I only found myself becoming drunk on desire. And this intoxication was making me bold.
Very bold.
I began unbuttoning my shirt, and when he realized what I was doing, Ryan broke our kiss and let out a deep shaking breath. He leaned back and watched me, and when the last button was undone he pulled it back and began kissing my chest.
The rush that was coursing through me was intense. Just having a man this close to me, being this intimate with me, it was exhilarating. And knowing where it was going to lead to, I was excited, there wasn’t an ounce of fear in me – I wanted this.
I removed my shirt, and while I was tossing it onto the floor beside me, Ryan was unbuttoning his own. He leaned forward once it was unbuttoned and tossed it to where mine was, and I was reintroduced to his tanned chest, with a nice gathering of dark chest hair.
I wanted to kiss his neck, nip and suck on it, but before I got the chance Ryan was kissing my chest again, but this time his lips travelled over to my right pec. He put his lips around it, and began to suck and lick it with his tongue. He played with it until it was stiff, then moved to the next one and did the same.
Then he started to kiss my neck, both hands now sliding down the small of my back, hovering around the rim of my pants. There was a hunger to him, an eagerness that was invigorating.
This was it… I was going to have sex tonight.
Ryan’s hands slid to my front and he unbuttoned my pants. He then slid a hand down, and I gasped when he grabbed my dick.
But I didn’t want him to touch me through my pants. I got off of him and removed them, our eyes both staring hungrily at each other. I stepped out of my trousers and while I slid down my boxer briefs, Ryan moved his own pants.
I paused and stared when he drew down his boxers. I’d seen it before briefly, but seeing him fully naked drew up all sorts of feelings and desires.
And not only was he naked… his penis was stiff, standing rigid as if inviting me to get on top of it.
I climbed onto him, our hearts both thrashing, two drum beats amplified by our mutual desires and urges. He wanted me just as much as I wanted him. That fact was clear as day, not only on his body, but his eyes as well.
We kissed and I spread my knees apart so what was between our legs were touching. Out of instinct, I began moving my hips, and when Ryan groaned from this, I started grinding my penis and testicles into his.
But wanting to be bold, I grabbed his dick and began stroking it. Ryan, his mouth open from his quickened breath, groaned again and threw his head back. “Fuck, Elish,” he moaned. “You have no idea what you do to me.” He slid a hand behind my neck and we kissed again, then he took my penis into his hand and began stroking it as well.
The feeling was unbelievable. I looked down and watched him twist his hand over the head, then draw it back, making the head of my penis poke through his clenched fist. He slid it down to the base, then back up, then urged me forward so my head was near his.
“I’m going to suck and lick you until your cum fills my mouth,” he whispered to me, his hot breath tickling my ear. “Then I’m going to make love to you, and make you cum again and again. All night, prince.” He kissed my neck and I gasped when I felt something hard press into my backside. It was the head of his cock.
“Do you want that?” he whispered. Another gasp came when his cock slipped through my cheeks and pressed against my hole.
I had to lean my forehead onto his shoulder. “Yeah,” I moaned. I’d never done anything with that part of me. I hadn’t even started exploring the parts of me I should’ve been familiar with at thirteen. I didn’t know how it was going to feel, or what I was supposed to do but…
“You’ll teach me?” I whispered to him. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Ryan groaned and kissed my neck, he started moving his hips so the head of his cock was rubbing against my hole. “That’s what I am, Elish.” He kissed me again. “Your teacher.”
Then suddenly, the lights turned on.
The fucking lights turned on.
My head shot up and I looked behind the couch to where the light switches were.
And there my heart dropped. There my brain froze.
Because in the archway of the stairs, I saw my doom.
Silas.
He was staring at me, his eyes holding a rage in them that would’ve made the lights around us unnecessary. There was no movement on him, and for a moment he seemed frozen, forgotten by time, or perhaps time itself was too afraid to touch him. But as I stared at him, I realized that time had actually slowed down. I myself was in the process of jumping off of Ryan; my mouth open in a gasp and my heart skyrocketing to my throat.
Then, as my
legs landed on the floor, time found me, snatching me by the neck and propelling me forward. And the first thing I heard was my own gasping inhale, followed by his stammered name as I covered myself in front of him.
Silas’s gaze broke from me, and his eyes focused on Ryan now standing beside me, the same terrified expression on his face. I saw Silas’s pupils retract before a sneer of rage wiped away the dumbstruck shock.
And then he advanced on us.
He was going to kill Ryan. I looked to Ryan, my legs frozen on the ground. I opened my mouth to yell at him to get the hell out of here, when I saw a flicker of movement out of the corner of my mind.
Followed by a blow to my face that snapped my head backwards.
Silas wasn’t going for Ryan – Silas was going for me.
I was knocked off of my feet, but in midair I was grabbed. Silas yanked me forward and punched me in the face again, this one shooting shards of tooth into my mouth, then I felt myself get thrown through the air.
My body slammed against the wall and I landed hard on the ground. I gasped for air, pain coating my body like a second skin, and began choking as my mouth filled with blood.
Then I coughed and blood sprinkled on the wall. I stared at it, and continued staring at it as I was grabbed again.
I didn’t realize that my brain had stopped accepting noise until the sounds of the room came rushing back to me. Like an assault, I heard screaming, fast-paced desperate talking and my own thrashing heart. “Answer me! Answer me, you little whore!” Silas’s voice boomed, ripping through the other noises currently attacking my brain. I hadn’t heard what he’d asked me, my ears had heard nothing.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry!” I choked.
Silas’s hands shifted and I felt them grab my neck like a steel trap. I gagged, blood catching in my throat and flying up my nose, and desperately tried to inhale, but his locked hands had closed off my throat.
I looked at him, and fear replaced the blood coursing through my veins when I saw the expression on his face. It was both demonic, and that of a ghost, burning rage behind emeralds lit on fire, but at the same time, his face was blank, his eyes staring.
He’s going to kill me.
Look at his face. Look at that disconnect – that rage.
He’s going to kill me.
Silas’s stranglehold tightened and automatically my hands flew up and began clawing the skin of his arms, pressure pounding against my head and making it throb. I couldn’t breathe, my face, my ears were on fire, and I was soon seeing red and black take over my vision.
Then I saw Ryan behind Silas. With an anguished and fearful expression, he wound back his fist and punched Silas in the back of the head.
I was dropped on the ground. I gasped for air like a fish on sand, but soon after landing, I was grabbed by Silas and punched in the face and head.
“Did you fuck him?” Silas snarled. He had my hair in his fist and was wrenching my head up. My senses were scrambled; lights were flashing in front of my eyes. My mouth, nose, everything hurt, everything was full of blood.
“N-no!” Ryan cried. He was on his knees; blood dripping down his face and making a splatter painting on the carpet. “I didn’t. I swear I didn’t.”
“What the fuck did you do?” He was in an insane state; his body was trembling. Fuck. I couldn’t breathe. I can’t breathe.
“Just kissed…” Ryan stammered.
Silas dropped me and stalked over to him. Ryan cowered down but suddenly a piercing scream shot through the chaotic air. His head was wrenched up as if someone was grabbing it, then it was pulled backwards. I could see his muscles straining, the lines in his neck jutting out and twitching.
His eyes, they were bulging out of his head.
And Silas’s were black.
“What did you do?” Silas snarled. Ryan screamed again, his body tensing up and tightening. Both hands then flew to his head, grasping tufts of his wavy black hair.
“We made out… there was some touching. I didn’t fuck him!” Ryan screamed again and fell backwards onto the carpet.
My blurring eyes looked behind him and I saw Nero, Garrett, and Ellis looking on in horror by the stairs. None of them moving.
Then Silas turned to me, his face on fire and his chest heaving. He glared down at my naked and bloodied body with hatred in his eyes, beholding me with a gaze that told me I was nothing to him.
I couldn’t even recoil and cry out when he stalked up to me. All I could manage when he grabbed my hair and pulled me up and off of the ground, was a sputtered gasp.
He held me in front of him and glared me down. It looked like he wanted to say something but his teeth were clenched tight, his lips flexing and curling over them like a snarling dog.
Then suddenly I felt him grab my genitals and I shrieked when he crushed them in his grip. “Is that who you are, Elish?” he screamed in my face. He began to twist them, the pain unimaginable. “You’re a little fucking whore? Is that who you are?”
“Dad, stop!” Ellis shrieked behind me. I could hear Nero’s booming voice, Garrett’s desperate pleas.
“Master Silas, stop!”
“You’re going to kill him! You’re going to fucking kill him! Please!”
“ANSWER ME!” Silas yanked the hand clenching my penis and testicles forward and I screamed again, blasts of dizzying, throbbing red pulsing in my vision. I couldn’t breathe; the pain was so intense I couldn’t think. Everything was just a blur of incomprehensible agony and fear.
He dropped me and my senses shot out of me as I landed hard on the floor. All I could hear now were my siblings’ hollering, but their desperate pleas were drowned out by my rattling breathing.
Then I saw Silas looming over me, and watched helplessly as his socked foot rose up then slammed down onto my groin, crushing my genitals. I threw up from the pain, bloody vomit covering my face, but by the grace of some dead god I gathered the strength to bend my knees to try and protect myself.
But that ended up being a mistake.
Silas got down on his knees in front of me and grabbed my neck again. “You’ll let a man touch you so freely? So easily?” he snarled. Suddenly I felt his fingers dig into my backside, they broke through the cheeks and I felt his fingernails scrape the hole. “You’re disgusting. You’re fucking nothing to me!” A shriek ripped from my lungs as he attempted to force two fingers inside of me, but my body was too damaged to move.
“Why the fuck are you screaming? Isn’t this what you like?” Silas yelled. “This is what whores like, Elish. And you’re nothing but a fucking cheap whore.” He dug his fingers in further, then raised a hand and punched me in the face. “You’re nothing! YOU’RE NOTHING!”
I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
I screamed again, wetness now making his fingers slippery and slick, then heaved and threw up on myself and the ground. Silas responded by punching me in the face, and more teeth shards mixed in with the lake of blood that kept pooling in my mouth.
I lifted my hand and put it to my face to protect myself, but he grabbed onto my fingers. I tried to slip my fingers through his steeled grip, hoping the blood would act as lubricant, but Silas crushed them like my bones were old bread.
Then Ellis appeared behind him. I stared up at my sister, tears and terror in her eyes, and watched her grab onto Silas’s shoulder. She wrenched it back, begging him to stop.
Silas whirled around and backhanded her. My sister went flying past Nero and Garrett’s terrorized eyes and landed on the ground.
Then Nero and Garrett grabbed Silas and pulled him away from me. I caught a glimpse of his fingers as he was dragged away, they were shining with blood.
“You’re going to kill him!” Nero sobbed. He had Silas in a bear hug, and as soon as Garrett was convinced Nero had a good hold, he ran to me.
“Elish? ELISH!” Garrett screamed. “We need Liam! He’s going to die!”
My brother’s face began to fade away, I felt as if I was being dragged backwards down a dark p
ath, and the reality in front of me was merely… merely a fleeting…
“ELISH!”
“Let him die.”
“WHAT?” Nero cried. “NO!”
“He’s nothing. Let him die.”
“He’s fucking something to me! He’s something to us!” Garrett screamed, then he began sobbing. “Please, Silas… please.”
“NO!” They were screaming, all of them. I took in a heaving, painful breath and tried to focus my eyes, tried to see what was happening. Everything was turning and swirling, I was being spun… spun… spinning in midair.
“No, please… Master…don’t leave him there to die.”
“Upstairs.”
Then the lights turned back off.
I was left where I’d been dropped, darkness around me with nothing but the low thumping of the pulse that seemed rooted inside of my brain. There was pain everywhere and I couldn’t breathe, every gasping breath had me fearful that it would be my last.
What would death be like? I didn’t want to find out and that drove me to count every breath that filled my lungs. I would live second by second, breath by breath. If the Grim Reaper was to find me, I wanted to go out fighting for every blood-soaked inhale.
I got to breath seven hundred, forty-nine when I found myself no longer able to fight the darkness. And it was then I slipped into unconsciousness, and I floated around oblivion and felt nothing, saw nothing, was nothing.
Until I heard voices and the feeling of many presences around me.
Then blinding white light.
“He’s squinting…” Ellis said breathlessly, relief tightening her voice. “Elish?” The light faded and a hand patted my cheek. “I don’t know where to start… Where do we start, Garrett?”
“The gash on his head will be easiest for you…” Garrett whispered. “His head is bleeding the… Oh fuck, look at his mouth.” His hand easily pulled my jaw down. “His teeth… his teeth are half gone!”
“Look at all this blood…” Nero groaned. “He’s going to fucking die, isn’t he?” Nero choked and let out a stifled cry.
