Lost In You (Swanson Court #3)

by Serena Grey

  We sit there for a long time, his kisses sweet on my face and my hair, and his hand stroking my back. This is happiness, I think silently, exultantly. It’s loving, and knowing that you’re loved in return. With Landon, I feel as if I’ve finally found exactly where I belong.

  Later, I steal a glance in the direction of the party. The music is still playing, and I can still hear voices and laughter. “You can’t come all this way to a party and not get to dance,” I tell Landon.

  He follows my gaze, then laughs, and the happiness I hear in his voice mirrors mine. “Well, come on then,” he says, getting up. He takes my hand and pulls me to my feet, and we walk arm in arm to join the rest of the party.

  THERE’S something magical about holding on to Landon and swaying slowly to the music even as the party ebbs around us. I can hear people leaving. The loud goodbyes and congratulations, but I don’t care. I just want to remain in Landon’s arms forever.

  “Whose engagement party is this?” Laurie asks playfully, coming to join us in the middle of the lawn. “We’re leaving,” she tells me, when she gets my attention, “though I doubt that you’d notice.”

  My head is still on Landon’s chest. “Say bye to Brett for me, and congratulations.”

  She holds out her arms and I step out of Landon’s arms to give her a hug. She’s spending the night at Brett’s, something that’s going to become permanent when she completes her move to his apartment.

  “Take care of my cuz,” she tells Landon. There’s a warning note in her voice, but her eyes are shining.

  I look up at Landon just as he smiles, and as usual, it’s devastating. My heart flutters, and for a moment, I can’t believe how happy, how lucky I am. “You know I will,” he tells Laurie.

  “Alright then,” she says. We hug again, then she does a small wave and returns to the house.

  I move back into Landon's arms. “You should be leaving too.”

  “Should I?” His hands circle my waist and pull me close. “I’m thinking of ways to convince you to come with me.”

  I giggle. “My parents expect me to spend the night with them, but I’ll be back in the city tomorrow.”

  He leans forward to place a kiss on my forehead. “You’d better,” he whispers.

  There’s a whole wealth of promise in his voice, and a small quiver of anticipation floods through me. I close my eyes, filling my senses with his nearness. We stay swaying on the lawn until the song ends, and the DJ gives us an apologetic smile as he switches off and starts to pack up his equipment. Inside the house, Laurie and Brett are already gone, and Dylan is passed out in the den. Landon says goodbye to Laurie’s parents and mine after thanking them for a wonderful party.

  “We were glad to have you,” Auntie Jacie tells him. From her smile, it looks like she’s already planning another engagement party in her head, and the thought of planning a future with Landon no longer makes me feel hopeless, because now I know he loves me.

  “We’ll be leaving in a few minutes,” my mom reminds me as I follow Landon to the front door, almost as if she’s afraid that I’ll choose that moment to elope with him.

  “I’ll be right back,” I tell her.

  “Outside, Landon’s car is parked across the street from the house, under the trees that line the lawns. A few petals have fallen off the trees onto the hood of his car, and the breeze shifts them across the gleaming metal.

  We reach the car and Landon leans on the side, with me standing in front of him. He cups my chin and raises my face to his, his blue eyes roving over every inch as if he’s trying to burn every one of my features into his memory. “God, I’ve missed you!” he murmurs.

  I wrap my arms around him. “I’ve missed you too.”

  He drops a kiss on my forehead then trails a path of sweet kisses down to my nose. It tickles and I pull back, laughing. He’s laughing too, and there’s an expression on his face that looks like the bliss I’m feeling, and it warms me up inside. “I love you, Rachel Penelope Foster,” he says with a laugh and a small shake of his head. “You won’t believe how happy saying that makes me feel. It’s as if I’ve been lying to myself and I can finally say the truth.”

  I grin. “Well, I love that you love me, Landon Alexander Court, and I love you too.”

  He chuckles. “Now I’m even happier than I was a moment ago.”

  My eyes close as my chest expands with almost uncontainable joy, and Landon pulls me back into the circle of his arms. “I love you,” he whispers again, right before his lips take mine.

  It starts soft and sweet, a teasing, caressing pressure on my lips that floods my heart with warmth. I kiss him back, wanting nothing more than to surrender myself to his touch. His hands move across my back, pressing me closer to his hard body while the kiss deepens. His tongue plunges into my mouth, caressing mine and flooding my body with a wild, pulsing heat.

  He pulls back after a moment, leaving me panting and breathless. He’s breathing deeply too, grinning as he looks down at me. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” he says, his voice dark with sensual promise.

  My breath catches. “I can’t wait.”

  He waits in the car, making sure I’m almost at the door before he starts to drive away. Inside the house, Dylan is still dozing on the couch in the den, but my mother is packing things up in the kitchen.

  “Well, at least you didn’t leave with him,” she remarks. I can’t tell if the expression on her face is disapproval or the opposite. Aunt Jacie gives her a look before smiling at me.

  “Well, I was glad to see you looking alive for the first time all weekend.”

  “I’ve been looking alive,” I protest halfheartedly. “I’m just tired. Work and everything.”

  “Hmm.” She doesn’t sound convinced.

  “Can I help?”

  My mom shakes her head. “Go find your dad. Tell him we’re leaving.”

  My dad and Uncle Taylor are in the study bent over their unending chess game. It’s not really endless, they just start another game as soon as someone wins, so there’s always a game going on.

  “Hey dad, Uncle T,” I call from the door.

  “Time to go?” My dad looks regretful. As he gets up, he wags a finger at his twin. “Don’t cheat,” he warns Uncle Taylor.

  “Never,” Uncle Taylor replies, winking at me. They both cheat, which is why no one else will play with them.

  We go back to the den and wake Dylan, then my mother joins us from the kitchen, and we hug our goodbyes before heading to the car, where Dylan goes straight to sleep again.

  It’s a short drive, and my mother keeps up the conversation, talking about everything from the music to the caterer, to family friends with little kids who had grown up fast.

  At home, Dylan goes to bed. My dad too, but my mom follows me up to my old room, wondering aloud about the arrangements for Laurie’s wedding, how little time we have to prepare, if we’ll have to import the flowers from home or procure them in Bridgetown… I listen to her chatter, waiting for her to say what’s really on her mind.

  Once we’re in the bedroom, she goes to sit on the edge of the bed. “So, Laurie’s moving out,” she starts. “You’ll find another roommate won’t you? So you won’t be alone? I’ve heard that singles thrive better when they have roommates.”

  “Ha ha,” I smile. “I haven’t decided. Maybe I’ll enjoy living alone.”

  “Okay.” She shrugs. “It’s so nice to have you here.” There’s nostalgia in her eyes. “You haven’t been home much these past few weeks.”

  “I miss you too mom, all the time.” I laugh. “Feel free to invite me to any ‘art’ things you have in the city.”

  “So you can run away with Landon Court like you did the last time.”

  I don’t reply, so she continues. “Sweetie, I don’t want to be worried about you, especially since you seem so happy, but are you sure he’s the right person for you?”

  I join her on the bed. We’d talked when I was insecure about Landon’s feelings for me, s
o I don’t blame her for her concern.

  “Mom, I’m in love with him.”

  “I can see that.” She sighs. “You already told me as much anyway. But what about him? Does he share your feelings?”

  Does he love me?

  I smile because there’s no longer any doubt in my mind. “He feels the same way,” I tell my mom, pleasure bubbling inside me again. “He feels the same way.”

  She nods, leaning forward to touch a finger to my cheek. “You should always feel safe in your relationship, and you should be extremely sure of the person you love. Committing to someone is the most important decision you’ll ever make, and it can either take you to places you want to go or it can destroy you.”

  “Mom!” I exclaim, laughing. “You are not speaking from experience.”

  “How do you know?” she laughs. “Maybe I led a dangerously adventurous life before I fell in love with your dad.”

  I raise a dubious brow and she sighs. “Okay, you’re right, I’m not speaking from experience, not mine anyway,” she admits. “But be careful, okay? I don’t want you to give too much of yourself and end up getting hurt.”

  “Don’t worry, Mom.” I give her a reassuring smile. “Landon is one of the good ones.”

  “Yes, but a man like him… wealthy, busy, with so many responsibilities… I just hope he’ll give you the time and attention to ensure you never feel…”

  “Unimportant?” I supply with a raised brow.

  “I was going to say neglected,” she amends.

  “Whichever one… just don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”

  “Alright then. You’re old enough to know what you’re doing.” She gets up and gives me one last concerned look. “Good night, sweetheart.”

  “Night, mom.”

  When she’s gone, I shower and change into my nightclothes. I’m about to call Landon when my phone rings. My whole body flushes with pleasure when I see his name on my screen.

  “Are you home?” I ask.

  “Yes, just got here. Are you in bed?”

  “Yes.”

  “You should have come with me,” he says. “Say you will and I’ll come right back to get you.”

  “No,” I laugh. “You waited two weeks, what’s one more day.”

  “I’ll make you forget about those two weeks. I promise you that.”

  My skin flushes. “Knowing your methods, can I just say I’m looking forward to that?”

  He laughs. “Say anything, baby. When I get you here tomorrow, the only thing you’ll be saying is my name.”

  “Maybe I’ll run away,” I tease.

  “I’ll find you.” He sounds serious. “No matter where you go.”

  “I love you,” I say softly.

  I can almost hear the smile in his voice. “I love you too.”

  MONDAY morning, I go to work directly from my parent’s place, and after the crazy traffic and grumpy cabdriver, I finally reach the office just in time to avoid clocking in late.

  I smile at the interns on the elevator and throw a friendly greeting at the receptionist on my floor. Even Carole Mendez, my editor-in-chief’s dragon-like secretary gets a smile from me when I pass her in the hall. I can’t believe how happy I am. I feel as if I’m floating.

  Minutes after I enter my office, there is a knock and a delivery of the most beautiful arrangement of flowers ever. I retrieve the card, excited as I read Landon’s message.

  ‘Have a great start to your week,’ it says. ‘You own my heart.’

  I close my eyes, my hand going to my mouth as my heart floods with overwhelming emotion.

  Picking up my phone, I go to my last call and dial his number, and he picks on the first ring.

  “Hey, love.”

  “Hey, yourself.” I’m grinning like an idiot. “I got your flowers.”

  “I hope you like them?”

  “Are you seriously asking that?” I sigh. “Of course I love them.”

  I hear him breathe. “How’s it going over there?”

  “I just got to work. Nothing yet.”

  “I have this crazy desire to cancel my entire schedule for the day, come over, and steal you away,” he says. “I have a meeting in a few minutes, but I’m busy scrolling through pictures of you on my phone.”

  My heart swells. “What pictures?”

  “The ones from the beach in Newport,” he replies with a self-mocking laugh. “They’ve been my constant companions these past two weeks.”

  I remember that particular weekend, the Sunday afternoon we spent on the beach walking and taking selfies and I suddenly miss him with my whole being. “I want to cancel my schedule too,” I admit. I feel like I would be happy to shirk all my other roles, be his girlfriend and nothing else for as long as possible. It’s a silly thought, disloyal to all notions of female independence, but it’s born out of a profound and indescribable happiness. “I have to wean myself off you,” I say with a sigh. “I’m afraid of how totally you’ve captivated me.”

  “Don’t even dare.” Landon laughs softly. “Though I’m sure I’m the one who’s helplessly captivated.”

  “I can’t wait for this evening,” I whisper.

  There is a short silence on his end. “This time, I’m never letting you go.”

  I close my eyes. “I’m not going anywhere. Never again.”

  “I’m thinking up reasons to postpone this meeting so we can keep talking,” he admits.

  “What’s the meeting about?”

  “Does it matter?” There is a smile in his voice. “Actually it’s to discuss a conceptual design proposal for a property I want to acquire in Vegas.”

  “I read about that.”

  “So you were reading about me.”

  I smile. “Stop teasing.”

  “I kept all the articles that had pictures of us together. You looked lovely in all of them.”

  I close my eyes, not sure of how to reply to that. “Thanks,” I say finally.

  He chuckles. “You’re welcome,”

  “I have an interview today,” I tell him, explaining about the invitation from the Gilt Review.

  “Does that happen often?” His voice is serious. “An interview from such an old application?”

  I think of Gertrude Weyland, and Jack’s certainty that his mother had something to do with the whole situation, but until I confirmed it, I couldn’t say for sure.

  “I’ve never heard of anything like that happening here at Gilt, but I’m not going to let that stop me from going for it. It’s what I’ve always wanted.”

  “Well, that’s good,” Landon says, “and you deserve it.” There’s a short pause. “I really can’t wait to see you tonight.”

  I breathe softly, my fingers hovering over the soft petals of the flowers on my desk. I love him with an intensity that’s verging on desperation, and at that moment, it makes me almost afraid, because if anything happened, if anything changed, if I lost him again, I have no idea how I would bear it.

  “I’m counting down the hours,” I tell him, making an effort to push all my fears aside. Nothing will go wrong, not if we’re both committed to building our relationship. I know I am, and I know that Landon is too.

  Landon ends the call so he can start his meeting, and I inhale the sweet scent of the flowers before settling at my desk, wondering what I could send to him in return. I’m starting up my computer when I get an idea. I pick up my phone again, this time calling Chadwick.

  “I’m not mad,” he says when he picks up. “First you break my heart, then you introduce me to your cousin and she finishes the job.”

  “Chadwick!” I laugh, “Your heart’s the one in your chest, not the one in your pants.”

  “She didn’t do anything with that one either.”

  “Come on.” My voice is teasing, “You’re Chadwick Black, there are probably a hundred girls waiting for you to give them a call right now.”

  He sighs. “How is she?”

  I grimace. “Engaged.�
��

  “Perfect!” he says grumpily, “I talked her straight into another man’s home and hearth.”

  “We are all very grateful for that.”

  “Well,” he pauses, “What can I do for you?”

  “Are you still in town?”

  “Yes.”

  I tell him what I want, and by the time I’m done I can hear the excitement in his voice. “Of course,” he tells me. “I’d even do that for free.”

  I purse my lips. “That won’t be necessary.”

  “Okay,” he accepts. We make arrangements, and as I imagine what Landon’s reaction will be when I give him my gift, I can’t keep the excited smile off my face.

  MY interview is set for late in the afternoon, before then, I manage to sneak out to keep my appointment with Chadwick. Back in the office, I fix my appearance and take a deep breath. Gilt Review is only two floors above us, so I take the stairs, and by the time I get there, I’m nervous as hell, but also very hopeful.

  I’ll get the job, I tell myself, somehow sure that it’s my week of serendipity.

  The offices remind me a lot of Gilt Travel. It’s the same layout, and most of the people are regular, literary types, not like the fashion gods and goddesses at Gilt Style. One of the receptionists leads me to the conference room, and I wave at some of the people I know when I see them in the corridor. They’re probably wondering what I’m doing here. I imagine they’ll find out soon, and then it won’t be long before my colleagues downstairs find out, then my boss Jessica Layner will surely hear about it. I smother the little sliver of dread. Jessica would probably have something to say about me interviewing for Review, something I might not like to hear, but I’m not going to let that stop me.

  My interviewer is a woman in her mid-thirties, with a tired smile and a deep, husky voice. She introduces herself as Liz Buckley, the senior editor I’d spoken with earlier. For the interview, she asks me the typical questions, why I applied to the Review, what I think I can contribute, then we start to talk about the authors and stories recently published in the magazine, and since I’m a faithful reader, I know almost every issue by heart. She starts to look less bored, and after an animated discussion, she tells me to expect a call.