Rocked with Passion (A New Adult Rockstar Novel)

by Lacroix, Lila

  “Oh Sara, I’m so sorry. I’m so very, very sorry that that happened to you. No one should ever have to go through anything like that. You’re such a wonderful, beautiful, strong woman, and you deserve so much better than somebody who cheated on you.”

  I nodded. “Thanks Jonathan, it means a lot.”

  “Look, Sara, I know we didn’t get a chance to talk today, but I really did want to speak to you. I understand this because of what happened you want a few days or weeks to deal with things on your own…”

  “No, no it’s fine. I want to move on from this as quickly as I can. Honestly, I think the best thing I can do right now is try to forget about Kevin. You can tell me whatever you want to say.”

  “Is it too forward to invite you to dinner?” Jonathan asked, and if I didn’t know better, I would have almost thought he looked sheepish about it. I thought about his offer for a minute.

  “Is this… A date you’re asking me out on?”

  “What if it is?”

  “That’s not really an answer.”

  “Well, in that case yes. Will you go out to dinner on a date with me Sara?”

  It was funny, I’d waited over 10 years to hear those words. Well, not really waited so much as hoped and now for the first time in my life I was hearing them. Jonathan Knight wanted to take me out to dinner. I always thought this would be a joyous occasion, that I’d feel amazing, but really it just made things feel more complicated. I was happy about it, of course, but at the same time I still couldn’t get that punched in the gut feeling to go away. Maybe this wasn’t exactly the best time to go on a date.

  Still, I couldn’t deny the fact that I’d wanted this. I think that’s partly why I answered “yes, that sounds nice.”

  Jonathan smiled. “Excellent, I was hoping you’d say that. Shall I come pick you up say around seven?”

  “Seven sounds good.”

  When Jonathan left I took the opportunity to look at the clock. I didn’t realize that it was already after five. I was going to have to get going if I was going to be ready in time for the date.

  Chapter Ten

  John took me home, and I immediately went about acting like a lovesick teenager, trying to figure out what to wear. I had a few nice outfits by now, nicer than what I had when I first arrived in Los Angeles, but I still went through trying almost everything I owned, trying to find the perfect thing to wear. It felt like I was a teenager again. I wasn’t giddy with excitement, thanks to the events of the last few days, but I had to admit, the fact that Jonathan had asked me on a date was pretty cool.

  Finally, I settled on an elegant navy blue dress with a plunging neckline and a few ruffles. It was modern and elegant, and when I matched it with some silver jewelry I decided that this was in fact the perfect outfit to wear. I looked elegant and sexy, and while I was sure I wouldn’t fit in with the crowd at whatever restaurant Jonathan took me to, I’d probably be better at faking it.

  The closer it was to seven, the more nervous I got. What if this was just an elaborate prank? What if Jonathan was actually taking me out to tell me he was firing me for leaving my job? What if I was going to be humiliated, crushed for a second time tonight? I didn’t know if I could handle it. Get it together, Sara. He’s not going to do that. He’s asked you on a date. Nothing’s going to go wrong. The small pep talk helped, and I calmed down slightly as it came closer and closer to being time for our date.

  Sure enough, at 7 o’clock John was waiting for me. I slipped into the backseat of the car, expecting it to be empty, but Jonathan was there waiting for me. He beamed as he looked me up and down.

  “You look really amazing” he told me, admiring my body. I felt a blush creep my face and I was thankful it was dark in the back of the card.

  “Thanks” I muttered, not really sure what else to reply. It was true that I’d gone out to dinner with Jonathan the first night I was in Los Angeles, but that was different. That was simply to professionals getting a business deal sorted out. Now, we were on a date. I was on a date with the man I loved since high school. I felt awkward, clumsy, and as though every attempt a conversation was going to fail miserably. What had happened to the strong, confident Sara who arrived in Los Angeles to grow her business? She certainly wasn’t here tonight.

  We made small talk in the car on the way to the restaurant, the entire time I was hoping I wouldn’t screw anything up too badly. It was funny, doing my best not to make everything seem super awkward made me forget about the pain of losing Kevin just yesterday. Even the pain in my chest seemed to dullen slightly.

  When we finally arrived at the restaurant, Jonathan took my hand and led me out of the car. Hordes of waiting photographers came by trying to take her picture, but Jonathan confidently took my hand and led me pass them and into the safety of the restaurant.

  “What are they here for?” I asked, curious as to how the paparazzi knew where we were going to be. I imagine there must be somebody else even more famous than Jonathan inside the restaurant.

  Jonathan looked at me, bemused. “Do you know what restaurant this is?” I shook my head. “This is The Oak, the paparazzi are here because every night somebody incredibly famous always shows up.”

  My eyes widened as I looked around and realized Jonathan was right. We were in The Oak, which was hands-down the most famous restaurant in Los Angeles. Every famous celebrity, everyone who is anybody, was seen eating here. No wonder there were so many photographers around, it was easy pickings. As the waiter let us to our table, I spotted at least four movie stars and tried not to stare.

  I didn’t actually believe it was possible for Jonathan to take me somewhere even more impressive, even more filled with famous people than the last restaurant we had been two together, but here he had managed to do it. It was rumored that ordinary people couldn’t even get a reservation at the restaurant, and that one had to be a celebrity of a certain stature in order to be guaranteed a table. Jonathan was evidently of that stature.

  Once again, the waiter brought us our menus, and I was thankful to notice that this time it seemed to mainly be in English. I commented as such to Jonathan, who laughed.

  “I’m sorry, he exclaimed in between chuckles. I never actually thought about the fact that you wouldn’t have known what you are ordering the last time we went out. Why didn’t you say anything?”

  “Well, to be honest I already had felt out of place enough. I didn’t want to seem like even more of an outsider by not knowing what words on the menu meant.”

  “Did you really? Honestly, I had no idea. You looked completely comfortable.”

  “That’s something at least, since I was doing my best to act it. But really, it was my first time to a real restaurant outside of our small town in Ohio, and when I saw the beautiful clothing that everybody else was wearing, I was incredibly intimidated. They all seemed so beautiful, so glamorous and like they actually belonged, whereas I just felt like an imposter.”

  It felt funny, but it also felt good to be admitting all of these things to Jonathan. I felt like I was opening my heart to him, even though it was just our first date. Perhaps our only date. I didn’t know if he intended to ask me out again, but I decided that I was going to enjoy this evening while it lasted. Even if I could only have one date with this man, one night in which to live out my dreams, I was going to take it and I wasn’t going to brood about it.

  “Well, if you stick with me kid, I’ll make sure that sort of thing is normal” Jonathan told me with a wink. Once again I felt the blush creeping up my face. “But seriously, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, I just thought you might be impressed that I could get a table here.”

  “Oh believe me, I’m definitely impressed. In fact, I don’t even think you’re the most famous person here!”

  Jonathan laughed again. “That’s definitely true. Honestly, some days I wouldn’t mind just going and sitting in a diner somewhere, but that’s not really an option anymore if I want to do something private. There are always
fans coming up to me and stuff, which isn’t to say that I mind, it just makes it a bit awkward if I’m trying to have a conversation with someone. Sometimes I feel like a bit of a fake as well, like I don’t belong in these places either. It definitely took some getting used to, but don’t worry. No one here is staring at you, they’re not thinking that you don’t belong. You look fine.”

  “Thanks, Jonathan. I appreciate you saying that” I told him, and I did. In a way, this was how things had always been between us. I felt awkward and insecure, and Jonathan made me feel like I was important, like I was the most beautiful woman in the room.

  The conversation moved on, and I began to feel more at ease here with Jonathan. He ordered us some wine once again, and we ordered the special of the night. I wasn’t sure how much it cost, but I knew it was going to be expensive. Still, it wasn’t nearly as expensive as the bottle of wine which Jonathan ordered. As I browsed through the wine list, barely knowing the difference between a Chardonnay and a Riesling, I did notice the bottle he eventually ordered, namely because the price tag, at over $600, had caught my eye. Surely no one ever orders that one, I thought to myself as I looked in awe at the bottle of wine that cost more than a month’s rent back home. Of course, I never expected Jonathan to order it!

  The longer the night went, the happier I got. I’m sure the wine helped, and when Jonathan ordered a second bottle, I was tipsy enough not to resist. I wasn’t drunk or anything, just buzzed enough to forget about Kevin for a while and enjoy the night with Jonathan. We spoke about anything and everything under the sun. I told him about how I decided to start my own business, how I’d worked for another company in town until I had just one disagreement too many with my boss as to how to properly run a business. I used all my savings to start my business, originally working out of the apartment Kevin and I shared until I could afford the $200 a month it took to buy a tiny office space downtown. It was barely enough to fit myself and one client, but it was enough for my needs.

  “That’s actually a pretty incredible story. What happened to your old boss?”

  I shrugged. “I get the recession got him. He closed down after about three months. I wasn’t too surprised, I was just glad I got out of there before I lost my job. At that point I was already making enough money to pay rent and groceries, and really that was enough.”

  “You know, that’s a real story. That’s the American Dream you’re living. Not everyone has the balls to start a business, let alone be successful enough at it to pay bills and then some.”

  I could feel the blush creeping up my face once more. I always felt so embarrassed when Jonathan complimented me.

  “Thanks, but it’s nothing compared to what you guys did. There are thousands of bands out there that try and make it big, and you guys made it absolutely huge.”

  “Well, maybe, but it was a lot of luck as well. Honestly, sometimes I think it has to end. I think I’m going to wake up in the morning and we won’t have any fans, and no one will buy our records anymore. It’s silly, but it’s still something that worries me.”

  “Me too, I’m always worried my clients will drop me. Although now, I guess I kind of ended up dropping them.”

  It was true, I’d had to put my business in Ohio on hold while I worked in Los Angeles.

  “Well, when you go back there you’ll have a resume that can destroy your competition.”

  “True, and I have you to thank for that.”

  We finished dinner, and the waiter brought us chocolate and raspberry soufflés for desert. We savoured them in silence, enjoying the company. Eventually, however, desert was over. Jonathan ordered espresso, which we took our time drinking as well. It was as though we’d come to a silent conclusion: this date had to end sometime, but we both wanted to stretch it out for as long as possible.

  “So… ummm, I guess we should go” Jonathan finally said, and I nodded.

  “Thanks for tonight. It was wonderful. I really… I really appreciate it” I told him, smiling. It was true. I’d had a better time on this date tonight than I’d ever had on any other single date, and it had nothing to do with the meal that cost more than I used to make in a month.

  “No problem. Do you want to like, go back to my place and you know, hang out or something?”

  “That sounds good” I answered, as Jonathan helped me into my coat.

  I couldn’t believe this was happening. Jonathan had invited me to continue our date at his place. What did this mean? We were really just going to “hang out”? I kind of hoped not.

  John was waiting for us as we left the restaurant, the throng of paparazzi having thinned, but still very abrasive with their lenses and flashes. Once again, Jonathan took charge, guiding me through them and into the back seat of the waiting car.

  As we sped off, all I could see was stars from the light of the flashes from the camera. They left, eventually, and I looked at Jonathan.

  “Does it get easier, dealing with that?”

  “Yeah, it does. It’ll take a while. It’s more that you get used to it than it gets easier though.”

  We rode in silence the rest of the way. When we arrived at Jonathan’s place, all of the staff had gone home save for two people who worked security, both of whom worked outside. We were alone in the house.

  “Can I get you a drink or anything?” Jonathan asked as we went into his enormous living room.

  “Yeah, umm maybe just some juice?” I asked. I didn’t want any more alcohol. In fact, I didn’t really trust myself with this buzz, a part of me thought I should probably try to sober up. I sipped my juice as Jonathan turned on the TV. It was getting late, there wasn’t anything especially good on, so he settled on an old movie from the 90s and we continued to talk.

  I don’t know how long we were there for, just talking. It was like we were old friends, meeting for the first time. Somehow, since this afternoon when Jonathan had found my crying at the table, things had changed. It was different now, we were closer somehow. It felt good, I had to admit. Jonathan was the type of man I felt I could tell anything to.

  Eventually, the conversation waned. Somehow we had moved closer together. We’d started off sitting on the other side of the couch from one another, then slowly moved closer together until I could feel Jonathan’s heat radiating from his body. He was so close to me, I could just lean over and kiss him.

  And that was exactly what I did. I grabbed Jonathan and slowly moved my lips to his, feeling the heat from his mouth on mine. I closed my eyes as Jonathan kissed me back.

  “Are you sure you want to do this?” he whispered to me, and I nodded.

  “I do.” With that, Jonathan grabbed me close.

  “God, you have no idea how much I’ve wanted to do this to you, how much I’ve wanted you over the years” he whispered into my ear before nibbling on my earlobe and moving his mouth back to mine. A fire radiated through my body as Jonathan leaned into me, guiding me onto my back on the couch. He was on top of me, his mouth on mine.

  I could feel my body reacting to his touch already. My sex was on fire, burning hot and soaking wet, and we’d barely gotten started. Jonathan slipped his tongue into my mouth, and I grabbed his hair, pulling his head to mine even further, kissing him with a passionate fervour I couldn’t remember equalling before.

  Jonathan’s hands roamed up and down my body. He took his time, the touch of his fingers so light over my dress. It was just enough to make me beg for more, but not enough to make me feel so much pleasure it became unbearable. Really, Jonathan knew exactly what to do.

  His hands moved down my body and found my thighs. He reached to the hem of my dress and slowly moved it upwards. The feeling of the soft fabric against my thighs felt like nothing else. It drove me crazy, and I moved my hips towards Jonathan without even noticing it.

  I wasn’t the only one of us getting turned on. I could feel Jonathan’s erection pressing against me through his pants, feeling it getting harder and hotter with every passing second.

  Wi
th a deftness of hand that I didn’t know existed, Jonathan reached behind me with a single quick movement and undid the zipper of my dress. He slipped it up and over my head, leaving me naked save for the thin panties covering my nether regions.

  I could feel my chest heaving up and down as Jonathan moved up onto his knees for a second and admired my nearly naked body. I felt so exposed, so open to him, and yet it felt right.

  “You’re so god damned sexy” he told me, moving his hand to my breast and cupping it slowly, tweaking my nipple as he’d done the night before, only this time there was nothing in between our bodies.

  His other hand slipped down towards my panties. I inhaled sharply, and Jonathan stopped.

  “Are you ok? Do you still want to do this?”

  “Yeah… yeah, of course. Sorry, I’m just a bit nervous. It’s been a… long time, since I’ve done this with… someone other than… well, you know…” I trailed off.

  “No problem. Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle” he told me as he continued to slip his fingers under my panties.

  “Oh you’re nice and wet down there” he teased, moving his mouth onto my nipple for a moment.

  “Oh yes” I exclaimed, leaning back into the couch and closing my eyes, savouring every little sensation of pleasure coursing through my body.

  Jonathan explored my folds, his fingers gently, ever so gently moving in between them, his other hand moving down and sliding off my panties, leaving me completely naked on the couch. I could feel the juices from my sex beginning to drip from me, my body begging for more.

  “Oh God. I want you to take me” I begged. “I want you right now. I’ve wanted this for ten years, I don’t want to wait any longer.”

  “Patience, my sweet. I’m going to do you, but I’m going to savour every second of it. You’re like a sweet desert, and I want to enjoy every bite” he told me, gently nibbling my nipple, making me let out a small mewl of pleasure.