Astrosaurs 4

by Steve Cole

  “Please, listen!” the real Teggs begged them in his new, hissy voice. “We may look like mean carnivores, but I’m really your captain – and he is the real Iggy! Our minds have been put in the wrong bodies, that’s all!”

  “Ridiculous!” cried Dasta. “What a silly story.”

  And Arx believed him, of course, because he looked and sounded just like Teggs.

  “Now come on, Arx, get your beak moving on those ropes. Ahhh!” Dasta winked at the real Teggs. “Free at last!”

  “That is better!” cried Ardul, as Gipsy untied his ropes and he got to his feet. “Much better!”

  “You’re making a big mistake!” cried the real Teggs. “Arx, please—”

  But before he could say anything else, Dasta lashed out with his long stegosaur tail – and sent him flying into the real Iggy. Both the little dinosaurs ended up in a dazed heap in the corner.

  Dasta chuckled. He liked this new body – it was full of power!

  “Was that necessary, Captain?” Arx frowned.

  “Don’t feel sorry for him,” said the fake Teggs. “That’s Crool Dasta – the cleverest crook in the cosmos. I expect you’ve heard of me. Er . . . him. Haven’t you?”

  “No,” said Arx.

  Dasta sighed. “Well, anyway, he and his friend have been stuck on this space wreck for months, and it must have turned their brains funny. All this talk of swapping minds and bodies . . . Ha!”

  “What does this gadget do?” asked Gipsy, pointing to the mind-swapper.

  “It’s a terrible torture device,” Dasta lied. “First, they gassed us. Then they tied us up. If you hadn’t saved us, I don’t know what would have happened.” He reared up, eager to be off. “Now come on, we must be going!”

  Arx frowned. “Don’t you want to set up another beacon here?”

  “No time!” he cried. “We’re in a rush!”

  “Very well,” said Arx. “I suppose we’d better take these crooks with us. We can drop them off at DSS Headquarters on our way back from Diplos.”

  “This pair aren’t going anywhere,” said Dasta. “Deal with them, er . . . Iggy?”

  The fake Iggy marched over to the little dinosaurs and grabbed them by their tails. Then he shoved them both down the rubbish chute! A moment later, the mind-swap machine was stuffed down after them.

  “Iggy, what are you doing!” cried Gipsy. “Whatever they’ve done, we can’t just leave those dinosaurs here!”

  “Of course we can,” said Dasta.

  “Now, lead the way back to our ship. And that’s an order!”

  Arx nodded slowly. “Yes, Captain.”

  As Arx and Gipsy led the way, Dasta turned to Ardul. “I think I’m going to enjoy being a spaceship captain,” he hissed. “From now on, my mind is staying in this body.”

  “I is gonna enjoy being an iggu-nana, too,” said Ardul. “But I is not liking the thought of eating plants.”

  Dasta sniggered. “When these fools have taken us to the Geldos Cluster, they’ll be of no more use to us.” He licked his new, stegosaurus lips. “And then we’ll eat the lot of them!”

  Sprawled on a big heap of rubbish, the real Teggs opened his eyes. All around was dark and slimy and stank of rotten meat.

  “Iggy?” he hissed. “Are you there?”

  There was a clattering from the pile beside him. “Just about,” Iggy groaned.

  “I’ve never been hit by my own tail before,” said Teggs, ruefully. “That body of mine packs quite a punch, doesn’t it!”

  “What are we going to do, Captain?” Iggy whispered.

  Teggs reached out a claw and patted him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry,” he said. “We’ll find a way out of this.”

  But then, a deep rumbling sounded from the darkness. The rotten rubbish they were sitting on started to tremble and shake.

  Teggs stared around blindly. “What’s that?”

  “I’d know that noise anywhere,” said Iggy. “It’s engines. The Sauropod shuttle’s engines!”

  “Then . . .” Teggs swallowed, “then they’re leaving us behind!”

  “We’ll never see our friends again,” said Iggy, sadly. “And we’ll never get our bodies back!”

  Chapter Four

  NO ESCAPE

  DASTA ENJOYED THE walk from the Sauropod’s shuttle bay to the flight deck. Everyone he passed thought he was really Teggs, and they all smiled and saluted. Clearly, Teggs was a popular captain.

  “He won’t be for much longer,” chuckled Dasta.

  Gipsy and Arx led him on to the flight deck. Ardul was right behind him. Unfortunately, he was finding it harder than Dasta to get used to his new body. He kept walking into doors and walls.

  “Iggy, mind out!” said Gipsy. “You’ll bring the whole place crashing down.”

  “I is just, um, a bit dizzy after breathing in the grass,” said Ardul.

  “Gas, you idiot!” cried Dasta. “They didn’t leave us on a lawn, did they?”

  “If you’re not feeling well, Iggy, maybe you should lie down in your room,” Arx suggested.

  “Sounds good,” said Ardul. “Where is my room?”

  Gipsy frowned. “I’ll get one of the dimorphodon to take you there. Try to get some sleep!”

  She whistled to a dimorphodon and it flapped off into the lift. Ardul followed, drooling.

  “Don’t eat it, you idiot,” whispered Dasta. “Or they’ll know for sure you aren’t the real Iggy!”

  “It is a juicy looking flapper,” sighed Ardul, as the lift doors closed behind him. “But I will try.”

  “Ready to go, Captain,” said Arx. “Full speed ahead to Diplos?”

  “Diplos? Get real!” Dasta snorted. He stumbled into Teggs’s control pit and tried to look natural. “Steer this ship to the Geldos Cluster.”

  “Geldos?” Arx blinked. “But that’s in meat-eater space!”

  “So?”

  “So, we’re plant-eaters!” Gipsy protested. “We can’t just enter the Carnivore Sector without permission! They might think we are invading!”

  “Well, we’ll worry about that when the time comes,” said Dasta. “Head for the Geldos Cluster – now!”

  “Why?” asked Arx. “What’s so important? What about all those poor dinosaurs starving on Diplos?”

  Dasta peered at him from the pit. “Who is your captain, Arx?” he said quietly.

  Arx stiffened. “You are, sir.”

  “Then do as I say, you tiresome triceratops!” he bellowed. “Now!”

  Gipsy felt her legs wobble as Arx changed the Sauropod’s course through space. She had never, ever heard Teggs shout at his first officer before. What was the matter with him? Could the gas have affected him more than they’d thought?

  Teggs was acting like a totally different dinosaur . . .

  *

  Back on the prison, the real Teggs and Iggy were trying to find their way out of the slippery, slimy rubbish heap, carefully carrying the mind-swapper. They moved slowly at first, not used to their new, unfamiliar bodies. But soon they were climbing nimbly through the rubbish pile towards a faint, ghostly light.

  “Where’s it coming from?” asked Iggy.

  “It’s coming from the end of this chute,” Teggs reported. He patted a filthy metal pipe. “If we can climb up this thing, we’ll reach that light.”

  “What does it matter?” sighed Iggy. “We’re trapped here for ever, inside these silly little bodies – while Dasta and Ardul lead the Sauropod off to find their secret treasure!”

  “We’ll get our bodies back,” said Teggs. “After all, we’ve still got the mind-swapper. There’s still hope!”

  After a lot of scrabbling about, they found themselves at the top of the rubbish chute. A glass lid blocked their way out but Teggs found he was able to use his claws to prise it open.

  Iggy crawled out after him, carrying the mind-swap machine. “Where are we now?” he asked.

  Teggs looked around. They were in a large, echoing chamber, which was dimly li
t by a single light bulb. It was empty except for one thing – a spaceship.

  “This must be the prison’s docking bay!” cried Teggs. “When everyone else evacuated, I guess that ship wasn’t needed – so it was left behind!”

  “Maybe it doesn’t work,” said Iggy, trying not to get too excited.

  “You’ll soon get it going again,” Teggs told him. “You’re brilliant with engines!”

  The two of them ran across the deserted shuttle bay to inspect the ship.

  “It looks all right,” said Iggy. “Tip-top, in fact. Which strikes me as strange.”

  “Why?” asked Teggs.

  “Well, Dasta’s clever with machines too,” he said. “So why didn’t he just get on this ship with Ardul and take off for the Geldos Cluster months ago?”

  “Maybe he didn’t know it was here,” Teggs argued, climbing up the steps to the spaceship. He threw open the door.

  And an ear-splitting alarm went off.

  “Maybe!” gasped Iggy. “Or maybe he knew that would happen!”

  “So what!” said Teggs. “It’s only an alarm. There’s no one left to hear it!”

  But Teggs was wrong.

  A hidden door in the wall slid open. And something truly terrifying came out.

  Clanking and steaming, a line of massive mechanical T. rexes trooped into the docking bay. Each one was the size of a Sauropod shuttle. Their red laser eyes swept all about the room.

  “Now we know why Dasta and Ardul didn’t take this ship,” gasped Iggy. “The prison officers must use these things as guards!”

  “Just as scary as real T. rexes,” Teggs agreed. “But much easier to train, and less likely to eat the crooks they’re guarding!”

  “Prisoners escaping,” said the robot T. rex leader in a jerky voice. “Prisoners identified as Dasta and Ardul.”

  “We’re not!” shouted Teggs. “We’re peaceful astrosaurs! We’re just trapped in their rotten bodies!”

  But the computerized carnivores weren’t listening. They started clanking towards the shuttle. “Escaping prisoners must be destroyed!” they roared. “Kill them! Kill them both!”

  Teggs and Iggy stared helplessly as the T. rex robots closed in.

  Chapter Five

  THE ENEMY WITHIN

  “LOOK OUT!” YELLED Teggs, as the nearest robot T. rex fired laser beams from its glowing eyes. He grabbed Iggy by the arm and dragged him out of the way. The blast struck the side of the ship, which went up in smoke.

  “Thanks, Teggs!” said Iggy. “That was close!”

  “We’ve got one tiny chance,” Teggs said. “Our new bodies are smaller and faster than our normal ones. That’ll make us harder to hit.”

  Another blast of ruby light burned into the ground beside them. Teggs and Iggy ran for their lives, zigzagging across the floor. But more and more laser beams came zapping from the metal creatures’ eyes.

  “We can’t dodge them for ever!” gasped Iggy.

  Teggs nodded, and felt the searing heat of a death ray sizzle past his head. “Change of plan. Follow me!”

  To Iggy’s amazement, Teggs sprinted towards the nearest killer robot! He ducked in and out of the monster’s massive metal feet. Terrified, Iggy ran after him and joined in the dangerous dance.

  “It can’t shoot us when we’re almost underneath it,” Teggs explained.

  “But its friends can!” cried Iggy. Even now, more robots were closing in.

  “Get ready to dodge when I do,” Teggs told him. “NOW!”

  He and Iggy ducked away from the robot’s legs just as four of the T. rexes opened fire. The blast blew up the creature’s ankles. With a great robotic roar, it crashed to the ground.

  “One down, seven to go!” gasped Teggs. “We have to stay ahead of them!”

  Suddenly, Iggy had an idea. “Or just stay on their heads!” he shouted. “What do you think? These little bodies of ours should be good for climbing.”

  “I’m game if you are,” said Teggs.

  Together, they darted over to the nearest robot. It tried to stamp on them, but they were too fast and jumped on its tail. It tried to shake them off, but they were already climbing up its mechanical backbone.

  “Why are we heading for the head?” asked Teggs.

  “I want to do some robot brain surgery!” Iggy smiled. “This mind swap has put me in the mood!” And he dug his coelophysis claws into the back of the robot’s head. A moment later he had ripped away a metal panel and pulled out the wires within.

  The robot bucked like a deranged donkey, trying to shake them off. Teggs and Iggy clung on for dear life.

  “What are you trying to do?” Teggs yelled.

  “Start a brainstorm,” Iggy explained, wiggling some wires. “With any luck, this thing won’t just be after us any more. It’ll be after anything that moves!”

  There was a flash from inside the robot’s metal head. Suddenly, it was firing its lasers at the other T. rexes! One burst into flames and crashed against its neighbour, bringing it burning to the ground. The other T. rexes fired back wildly, hitting each other as well as the rebel robot. Their metal bodies were soon scorched and smoking. One by one they exploded in a blaze of sparks and went crashing to the ground.

  When the chaos was over, Teggs and Iggy were still clinging to their rebel-robot’s scrambled circuits. It looked around for anything else to fight – but found nothing. Slowly, the lights in its eyes flickered out. Then, it began to sway from side to side.

  “Get ready to jump!” cried Teggs, as the robot finally toppled over.

  At the last possible moment, he and Iggy jumped clear. The robot smashed into the ground – and they skidded safely on their bottoms to the far side of the smoky shuttle bay.

  “We made it!” whooped Iggy. “We actually made it!”

  “We did,” Teggs agreed. “But I’m not sure the ship was so lucky!”

  Iggy’s smile soon vanished as the smoke started to clear. Now he could see that the shuttle had been well and truly zapped. It had more holes in it than a Swiss cheese.

  “I hope you can fix that ship, Iggy,” said Teggs. “Because if you can’t, we’ll be stuck here for good!”

  Gipsy was worried. Her captain was acting very strangely. First, he ordered them to fly into the Carnivore Sector. Then he said he was going off to take a nap. Teggs never napped on duty.

  While Arx sat at his controls in a sulk, Gipsy decided to visit Iggy. She would ask him exactly what happened on board the space wreck. Perhaps he would remember something that might explain Teggs’s odd behaviour.

  But as she neared Iggy’s room, she stopped. She could hear voices. Teggs was in there, talking to Iggy. He wasn’t having a nap at all!

  Gipsy pressed her ear up against the door.

  “We’ll be coming up to the Carnivore Sector any time now,” Teggs was saying. “From there, it should only take a few hours to reach Geldos.”

  “I isn’t thinking I can last that long!” Iggy roared.

  Why was he talking so strangely? Gipsy wondered.

  “I is needing fresh meat! Let me eat just one of them flappers.”

  “No!” said Teggs.

  “There is lots of them about! No one will miss just one!”

  “I said no! You’re supposed to be an iguanodon. Eat some more ferns.”

  “Ferns taste of poo,” Iggy grumbled. “Can’t we just get one flapper? I will only nibble its beak, promise!”

  Gipsy gasped and jumped away from the door. Something was very wrong. Just what had happened to Teggs and Iggy on that space wreck?

  She rushed back to the flight deck. She would tell Arx. Maybe he would know what to do.

  But Arx had problems of his own.

  The Sauropod had been in the Carnivore Sector less than two minutes when a scary ship came whizzing into view. It was blood-red and shaped like a huge, jagged tooth, gleaming in the starlight.

  “A raptor death ship,” breathed Arx. It was the biggest he’d ever seen. He jabbed the red
alert button with his nose horn and the alarm pterosaur started squawking wildly. “Captain Teggs, Gipsy, this is Arx. Please report to the flight deck! Iggy, get to the engine room, quick!”

  Gipsy arrived seconds later. “I was just on my way to see you,” she said. “What’s up?” Then she saw the death ship on the scanner and her head-crest flushed bright blue. “Arx, they’re sending us a message!”

  “I suppose we’d better hear it then,” said Arx gravely.

  Gipsy flicked a switch. A sinister hissing voice sounded from the speakers. “Thisss is the Raptor Border Patrol,” it said. “You have entered the Carnivore Sssector without permission. Prepare to be destroyed!”

  Chapter Six

  CHASE THROUGH SPACE

  THE DIMORPHODON FLAPPED about in alarm. Arx swallowed hard. “This is the DSS Sauropod,” he said. “Please do not open fire. We are here on an urgent mission! At least, I think it’s urgent.”

  “What isss thisss mission?” demanded the raptors.

  Arx turned to Gipsy helplessly. “What do I tell them? I don’t know what we’re doing here!”

  Suddenly the lift doors opened and Teggs appeared – or rather, Dasta appeared in Teggs’s body. “Why the red alert?” he asked.

  “We’re about to be blown up by a raptor death ship, Captain,” said Arx. “They want to know what we’re doing here.”

  “Stupid raptors, sticking their snouts in,” said Dasta. “It’s none of their business!”

  “We would like to know too,” Gipsy said firmly.

  “How dare you question your own captain?” Dasta roared. “Now let’s just blast these raptors and get on with it!”

  Arx stared at him in horror. “We can’t just open fire on a raptor border patrol! That is an act of war!”

  “And disobeying me is mutiny, Arx!” said Dasta. “Fire cannons, torpedoes, everything. All at once!”

  Arx rushed over to the fake Teggs, still unaware that an evil carnivore had borrowed his captain’s body. “Please, Captain,” he said. “It’s not called a death ship for nothing! They could destroy us!”

  “Thisss isss your last chance,” hissed the raptors through the Sauropod’s speakers. “Explain yourselves or die!”

  “We have to fire first,” said Dasta. He gave Arx a crafty smile. “Trust me, Arx. Have I ever let you down before?”