Starlight

by Alexandra Richland

  “Thank you for your comments,” Paul replied.

  Now it was Beth’s turn.

  “Miss Sutton, what’s your first name?” Mr. Kazan asked.

  “Elizabeth, sir.”

  Recognition crossed the instructors’ faces.

  “Well, Elizabeth, you conveyed your fear in your husband finding out you overspent your allowance for the week very well. I did feel, though, that you could’ve added a bit more punch to your performance. It was clear you love your husband. However, his reaction toward you was extreme for a five-dollar over expenditure. You should have showed more assertiveness.”

  Beth nodded, struggling to keep her knees from buckling under the weight of her nervousness.

  “During the scene, I believed you cared about what he had to say, regardless of your disapproval in how he went about presenting his feelings, even when you turned your back on him to compose yourself,” Mr. Kazan added. “You wanted to be taken seriously and I also believed you wanted to resolve the conflict, whereas all he wanted to do was get you to agree he was right. Overall, very well done.”

  Beth exhaled the deep breath she’d been holding. She had to work on a few things, but still felt proud of herself, considering she had no Method acting training whatsoever and Mr. Kazan put her in this situation unexpectedly. For the first time in her life, she felt like a real actress, though she knew she still had a long way to go in becoming as talented as most of the people in this room.

  Paul started to walk back to his seat. Beth followed.

  “Not so fast, Miss Sutton,” Mr. Strasberg said. She stopped walking while Paul continued on his way. “This is a revolving performance exercise. Therefore, you’ll stay up here for one more scene and perform with another actor.”

  Beth’s heart fluttered as her anxiety returned. Despite her moderate success, she didn’t feel confident enough to do another performance.

  Mr. Kazan stood and turned to the audience. “All right, who’s next?” He surveyed the room and grinned. “Well, if it isn’t everyone’s favorite rebel! Get on up here. Let’s see if all that Hollywood sunshine made you forget how to really act.”

  The audience erupted into laughter. Beth darted her eyes around the room, hoping it wasn’t who she thought it was. The blood drained from her face.

  It was.

  Aidan rose from his seat in the back row, removed his jacket, and draped it over the back of his chair. Beth’s cheeks warmed as she scanned his broad shoulders and lean torso accentuated by his navy blue T-shirt.

  As he made his journey toward her with long, confident strides, her nervousness returned tenfold. There was no way she could act in a scene with Aidan successfully. Not only did she think he was too talented, but it was difficult for her to think straight in his presence, which she felt would result in a disastrous performance on her part.

  Aidan stopped beside her and shoved his hands into his pockets, his mint and smoky scents sweeping into her lungs and electrifying her from the inside out. The air felt charged, as though every particle around her pulled her toward him, desperate to close the short distance between them.

  Beth locked her knees in hopes of keeping her feet planted in place and not giving in to the intense attraction that beset her. Aidan’s lips lifted into a slight smile as his familiar green eyes pierced hers. Their color was remarkable. Paul Newman had nothing on him.

  Beth smiled in return, her heart swelling so greatly she felt she might choke on it. At that moment, she felt the most comfortable since her arrival. Wherever Aidan was, she belonged.

  “Hey.” His greeting was low and husky.

  Beth’s cheeks felt like they were on fire as she responded with a soft, “Hello.”

  Aidan’s arm brushed against hers as they faced the audience, sending a pleasurable tremor down her spine. Although she felt nervous about their impending scene, she also felt grateful for their early reunion. She hoped they could talk more after their performance, perhaps ending on a more positive note than their last encounter.

  Mr. Strasberg cleared his throat. “All right, you two, let’s begin.”

  Beth exhaled a deep breath, anticipating her next instruction and feeling determined to give the scene her all. For months, the Actors Studio had intrigued her, but with Aidan as her surprise costar, Method acting had just become a lot more exciting.

  ***

  Aidan sat down in a chair in the back of the room where the Actors Studio’s workshops took place. Luckily, everyone, including Mr. Kazan and Mr. Strasberg, were too busy concentrating on the actors at the front to notice his late arrival.

  Kazan was more relaxed about lateness. If Strasberg caught Aidan, he would’ve chewed him out in front of the group and kicked him out. There were no egos allowed at the Actors Studio and punctuality was strictly enforced. They were all students here to learn––equals––regardless of how many hit films or plays they had under their belts. The idea was that the instructors treated the students with respect, so they were expected to do the same to them and their fellow performers.

  Normally, Aidan followed the Actors Studio’s rules. However, he hadn’t decided on coming here until after he found out Beth switched her hotel, and by then, it was already after four o’clock. He had no choice but to sneak in late.

  As he looked around the room, which felt more like home to him than any other place on the planet, he recognized many faces. He strongly believed there was more talent within these walls now than on the Starlight Studios lot at even the busiest times.

  Paul Newman stood up front with Marjorie Martin, and Kazan and Strasberg assessed their performances. Aidan thought Paul was a stand-up guy and solid actor. He didn’t know Marjorie well enough to form an opinion of her.

  Kazan told Paul to stay up front after the performance and Marjorie took her seat. Then he announced an actress was required to take Marjorie’s place, a clear indication that today’s workshop focused on revolving performance exercises.

  Kazan walked up the far aisle, calling out for more volunteers. The esteemed director was forty-four years old, and born in Istanbul, Turkey, to parents of Greek descent. He had sharp features and a no-nonsense stare, which intimidated those that didn’t know him, in spite of his short stature. Aidan thought he was a genius and respected him more than any other man he knew.

  Kazan stopped halfway up the aisle and asked a brown-haired woman to come up to the front. A few people laughed at something she said. Aidan couldn’t see her face or hear her response because of where he sat, but he did know she wasn’t a regular at the Actors Studio. Members always stood up right away whenever called upon by the instructors.

  After additional coaxing, the woman finally stood and walked toward Paul. Her slim figure looked all-too-familiar. Aidan was captivated beyond comprehension. He peered over the crowd, waiting for the actress to turn around. When she did, he thought for sure he was seeing things. Beth, his Beth, was at the Actors Studio, the last place in the city he ever would’ve looked for her.

  Aidan sat in stunned silence and scrutinized her face as she stood beside Paul, awaiting her instructions. He hadn’t slept in over twenty-four hours and didn’t want to get his hopes up, only to find out she wasn’t actually here and his mind was playing tricks on him.

  When her angelic voice filled the room, he knew he definitely wasn’t hallucinating. He couldn’t believe how his luck had turned around. He’d felt so disappointed when he left the hotel with his note, but seeing her here now made up for everything.

  Beth ran through the scene with Paul without any major issues. Actually, Aidan believed she deserved a standing ovation. Instead, the room remained silent as everyone obeyed Strasberg’s strict no clapping rule, which was established because he didn’t want one performer to get more acclaim than another. Kazan and Strasberg were the only people qualified to criticize a performance and they always made sure it was done tastefully.

  The two instructors agreed with Aidan that Beth’s acting was impressive, especially
for her first Actors Studio performance. She wasn’t a member, but judging from what Aidan saw today and on the Checkmate set, she definitely knew the basics of the Method.

  Paul walked back to his seat and Strasberg told Beth to remain at the front during the selection of her next costar.

  Kazan stood and faced the audience.

  “All right, who’s next?” A grin appeared on his face as his eyes landed on the back row.

  Aidan slumped down in his chair, cursing under his breath. His cover was blown.

  “Well, if it isn’t everyone’s favorite rebel!” Kazan laughed, well aware how much he hated the attention. “Get on up here. Let’s see if all that Hollywood sunshine made you forget how to really act.”

  Aidan rose from his seat and took off his jacket. Normally, he would’ve replied with a smartass remark and then accepted the challenge, but he was too busy looking at Beth to think of anything clever to say. She looked shocked to see him. It didn’t surprise him. The last time they spoke was on the other side of the country and they didn’t part on the best terms.

  He approached her cautiously, noting how her complexion turned from pale to red. Stopping at a distance he hoped was comfortable for her, he presented an amicable smile. Thankfully, she smiled back. He relaxed a little, saying the first thing that came to mind.

  “Hey.”

  “Hello,” she whispered.

  Aidan stared back at her, mesmerized by her rich, brown eyes. By far, she was the prettiest dame he had ever seen. And she always smelled so sweet. Like vanilla. He wondered if it was her shampoo or perfume––or maybe her natural scent. All he knew for sure was she was perfect in every way, and for the first time since their last encounter, he felt whole.

  Beth broke eye contact first and turned to the audience. As Aidan followed, their arms brushed together briefly, but long enough to make his heart pound so loudly he thought for sure she could hear it, too.

  “All right, you two, let’s begin,” Strasberg announced.

  “It’s nice to see you back here, Aidan,” Kazan said.

  Aidan stole a sideways glance at Beth. “It’s good to be back.”

  “Okay, hopefully you remember how this works.” Kazan’s comment earned him a few laughs. “What do ya say, Lee, should we see if Hollywood ruined everything we taught him over the last few years?”

  Strasberg winked. “I say we come up with something special for the boy and let him show us what he’s made of.”

  Kazan folded his hands on the table, a cunning glint present in his eyes. “I agree, Lee. So here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to give you two a scenario, but this time, there will be no script. Improvisation will be your best friend during this exercise.”

  Aidan crossed his arms over his chest, the corners of his mouth lifting into a sly smirk. “Hell, Gadg, give us all you got. We can handle it.”

  ***

  Beth was stunned by Aidan’s smug reply. It was bad enough she had to act on the spot with Paul with a script, but now the instructors expected her to improvise a scene and do a terrific job, all because Aidan insisted they could handle it.

  She had never improvised during her acting lessons at Starlight Studios and felt terrified she would make a fool out of herself in front of her talented audience, not to mention Aidan, whose opinion she valued very highly.

  “Elizabeth, I realize improvisation may be new to you,” Kazan said, “but Lee and I have the utmost confidence in you after watching your performance with Paul. Remember, this exercise is meant to be a learning experience. There are no winners or losers here.”

  Beth smiled weakly, feeling Aidan’s eyes on her. “Of course, Mr. Kazan. I’m very grateful for this opportunity. Thank you.”

  Kazan’s grin widened. “Okay, you two, your scenario is as follows: Elizabeth, you and Aidan are engaged. You just found out from friends that Aidan has been seeing another woman behind your back, but he broke it off with her last night. You’re upset but you still love him and want to salvage your relationship.”

  “All right, sir.” Beth wrung her hands nervously.

  Kazan looked at her costar. “Aidan, you’re asking her for forgiveness and understanding. We’ll give you one minute to chat before you begin. The scene will end at the three-minute mark.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest.

  Beth turned to Aidan, hoping he would offer her some guidance. The intensity of his stare sent her heart racing, this time not from nerves, but a feeling far more pleasurable.

  “What do you think we should do?” she asked, toying with the lower hem of her sweater.

  Aidan shrugged, looking not even the least bit concerned. “How about I start the scene and you reply with whatever comes to mind? Then we can go from there.”

  Beth stared at him in disbelief. That was his bright idea?

  “I usually find with these things it’s better to just rely on your instincts,” he added.

  She nodded, but fear still gnawed at her stomach.

  “Miss Sutton, Aidan, your one minute is up,” Mr. Strasberg said.

  Beth exhaled deeply.

  Aidan stepped toward her with his hands together as if he was praying, his expression twisted with grief. “You mean everything to me. Please, don’t leave me.”

  Right away, Beth made the distinction between acting opposite Aidan and Will. In Aidan’s case, his performance was so genuine, so instinctive that she was immediately sucked into the scene as if she truly was her character.

  With just two sentences and one look, he made the scene seem far more significant than any of her acting exercises at Starlight Studios. The technique he used was extraordinary, so much so she couldn’t peg exactly what it was he did. It just was.

  Following her instincts, she said the first thing that popped into her head. “I care deeply about you, but I’m not sure I can forget about your betrayal. You say you care about me, but if you did, you wouldn’t have seen her behind my back in the first place.” She pressed the back of her hand to her forehead to indicate her distress. “And if you’re truly remorseful, then I should’ve heard about the affair from you directly, not through our friends.”

  Aidan grazed his fingertips across her cheek. She inhaled sharply at the surge of desire that swept her body.

  “I don’t care about that woman at all.” His voice was low and full of promise. “I wasn’t thinking straight. I just went to her to try and escape an issue I’m too afraid to talk to you about because I don’t want you to think less of me as a man.”

  Beth shook her head and stepped back, hoping the distance would extinguish the sparks that danced across her skin from his touch.

  “That’s a poor excuse.” She was surprised her voice sounded so strong. “Infidelity makes lesser men, not divulging troubles to someone who cares about you.”

  Aidan hung his head. “I know I don’t deserve you, yet I want to be worthy of you. You make me a better person and I’m gonna do whatever it takes to regain your trust. Please, give me another chance. I can’t fight my demons without you.” He lifted his gaze and stepped closer.

  Beth used all of her might not to reach out to him. Although her first reaction was to say, “Yes, anything you say,” she knew that reply was unrealistic for the scene. She opted for another route.

  “It breaks my heart that you would withhold something so important from me. I would never judge you or look down on you, yet you still hesitate to open up to me. Whatever you’re going through, we can handle it together. You can trust me.”

  “I’ve felt so alone, so terribly alone.” His voice cracked. “I know I’m damaged and undeserving of you, but I need you.”

  Beth sensed a dual meaning behind his words and determined they weren’t discussing the fake scenario of an affair anymore. Whether or not it was intentional on his part, she wasn’t sure, but if this was his way of reaching out to her comfortably, then she would go along with it.

  She cradled Aidan’s cheek in her palm, em
bracing their undeniable connection and hoping it would lead him to open up to her more. “I want to help you, but you have to give me something to work with. I don’t want to be in the dark anymore. If it’s going to be just you and me from now on, then we can’t have any secrets between us.”

  He placed his hand over hers. “From now on, no more secrets, I promise.”

  Beth brushed her thumb across his cheek and watched the tension ease out of his expression. A tear trickled down her face. She pulled her hand away and averted her gaze.

  “I can’t lose you,” she whispered, knowing she, too, was no longer playing a role.

  Aidan pulled her into his arms, cradling her delicately, and brushed his lips to her ear. “I won’t let you lose me.”

  With a soft whimper, Beth returned the hug, pressing her damp face to his chest and closing her eyes. She had never felt so safe––so right––in her entire life, and desperately hoped he felt the same way.

  “Your time is up, thank you both.” Kazan’s quiet interruption stirred Beth from her seventh heaven.

  Aidan released her and looked toward the back of the room, his eyes unfocused and watery. Beth studied his despondent expression, hoping he wasn’t going to withdraw from her again. After a few painstaking moments, he emerged from his reflection. Exhaling deeply, he looked at Kazan and Strasberg, without glancing in her direction. Disappointed, she focused on the instructors as well.

  “Wonderful job,” Kazan said. “We don’t have much time left, so I’ll make this brief. Aidan, telling Elizabeth that the affair was the result of a deeper problem––an inner conflict you were battling––was brilliant. The situation became about trying to fix your personal demons and presenting you as the victim, which made it difficult for her to remain angry with you. You owned up to your mistake and vowed to change, which was very effective as well.”

  Strasberg’s critique followed. “Miss Sutton, I enjoyed how you let him know that if you two were going to continue your relationship, things needed to change. There was no you versus me in your declaration, only we and us. It was a powerful approach to the scene.”