Finding Erin

by America Leigh

  Finding Erin America Leigh.

  Finding Erin

  A true Identity Novel

  By

  America Leigh

  Copyright © 2014 America Leigh

  Synopsis.

  Have you ever been so lost, that’s there nowhere to turn?

  Nowhere to hide?

  Nowhere to run.

  How about not knowing anything. Waking up to find, you don’t even exist. That your memories are lost, forgotten or even insignificant that no one knows who you are?

  That’s me.

  The girl with no past, the girl with no future. They say to know where you’re going is to know where you came from. But what if that’s your biggest obstacle, that one tiny detail, to know who you truly are?

  I’m Erin, or so they tell me. That’s the name they gave me when they found me alone, unconscious with no name, no records and no family to take me in. I’m Erin Frost, the girl with no past and no future, until something changed and now I’m hiding from both, but to truly find myself I have to face the darkness of my past and the light of my future has both have the potential to destroy me. What would happen if you had no clues, no ties and no connections? That would be me.

  Edward Vance had everything, encrusted in a neat and pretty package of wealth and power combined with being the son of one of the most powerful men in the world. Eddie on the other hand couldn’t care about what people thought or even said about him. He’s spent the last ten years searching for his other half. Turning the once shy and withdrawn young man into the tyrant of the business world that he is today. Eddie’s world crumbled when his soul mate was snatched from him leaving him empty in side. Making him hard and determined in return, to find what was rightfully his. A cold trial finally leads him to Maggie, but she’s not Margaret Montgomery anymore. She’s Erin Frost now and a whole different kettle of fish to contend with, as Eddie battles with the past and trying to save their future. They have to learn to lean on each other once again and discover that the only person they can trust is each other.

  Prologue.

  Eddie. 2004

  “Rinnnnnng, Rinnnnnng, Rinnnnnng”

  I listened to that same tone for the last five minutes and panic was starting to set in. The echo of the rings were puncturing my heart like a sphere, slowly bleeding out. This was the second day she hadn’t answered my calls or the countless texts I’d sent her. This wasn’t like Maggie.

  My Maggie.

  She always answered, unless she was in class or her dad was around. She would have called me back. But two days, was so unlike her. I checked the phone again, making sure I was actually calling the right number. I swiped to end the call and slipped it back into my pocket. Looking around my dorm room, trying to figure out what the hell I was going to do next. I could call her mother and ask where Maggie is? But that would be a conversation I really didn’t want to torture myself with. I could call my mom instead, but every time I mentioned Maggie’s name. I got the safe sex talk and the ‘be careful, she’s only fifteen’ discussion. I wasn’t stupid, I’d been in love with Maggie before I could even remember, even before I really knew what love was? There’s only three years between Maggie and I, but because I’m eighteen and a lustful, unruly boy. My mother’s words not mine. I’m automatically going to corrupt my fifteen year old best friend into my best friend. Who by the way, I would die for. Please! None of them really understand that I could in fact, be one hundred percent in love with her and not just want in her pants. It’s not that I don’t want to, I’m only human after all, but she’s so much more than that. Her honey coloured hair drops in waves around her waist and those hazel eyes that call me from hundred miles away remind me of luscious chocolate that make my mouth water.

  I started to pace the room, there wasn’t much room in here but it was clean and mostly tidy. Unless you count Adam’s collection of clothes on the floor or the porn stuffed under his bed that you can blatantly see. He was secretly hoping his mother came by and shocked the shit out of her. Every step I took, my anxiety climbed. Ready to shoot through the roof like a rocket ready to combust. God, this is not like her to make me worry like this. I ran my sweaty palms down the front of my trousers. We had made a pact when I left for university. She would call me every day and text when she could and I’d sneak to see her every couple of weeks. Which was working out quite brilliantly, I might add. Well that was until I called about this coming weekend and the silence had began. Pacing the room was not helping at all, I had to stop myself. I stood in front of the mirror like a pansy berating myself to just pick up the fucking phone and call her mom and have done with it already. I really should have these pep talks with myself more often to kick myself up the backside. I smirked at myself in the mirror. Maybe that would work when I had papers due too.

  “Hey man, what’s up” Rafi asked, sweeping through the dorm room, running his fingers through his dishevelled black hair. He looked like he had been out for a run, but I knew better than that. Lucky Bastard. He hadn’t made it back last night, no doubt he was getting friendly with the female population on campus. He shot me a questioning look, knowing something was seriously up, he noticed me pacing the room. Rafi stood over me at six foot three, sizing me up. He stood back with his arms folded, waiting for an answer.

  “Maggie hasn’t called in two days”

  “So call her mamma, if you’re that worried” he quickly retorted back with a ‘just do it look’ on his face.

  “Alright, alright, I was just thinking of that”, I answered through gritted teeth. A feeling of uneasiness washed over me.

  “Sure you were” Rafi added in that sarcastic tone he was prone for, raising his eyebrows in response.

  I blew out a frustrated breath, here we go again. Ringing Marilyn Montgomery was never a chore I enjoyed. Apart from the mediocre tone of her voice and the pure contempt she has for me, she could make you feel like you’re not worthy to even hear her voice. Which is ironic, as her daughter is the complete opposite of both of her parents combined. Maggie’s kind, sweet and so caring that everything she does is never for herself, just the opposite in fact. Rafi just stood there, waiting for me to snap into action, I slipped out my iPhone from my jeans back pocket and dialled Marilyn.

  “Marilyn Montgomery speaking” she answered sharply after only one ring. She sounded nervous, on edge a little. Which wasn’t unheard of, but characteristically unusual for her, especially when speaking to me. The uncertainty in her voice couldn’t be denied. What the hell was going on? Something had happened, I could feel it deep down in the knot that had quickly formed in my stomach. I just needed to know where the hell my Maggie is?

  “Mrs Montgomery, it’s Edward Vance, I was…. Just wondering where Maggie was?” I asked, trying to keep my voice calm and smooth when dealing with Marilyn. The break in my voice made it clear I was practically losing it by this point.

  “I can’t seem to get hold of her” I added. I could hear a lot of sound in the background, people being hushed and asking questions around her. The Paddock was a closed house, only Maggie and her mother lived there full time now. Chris lived in London to manage the company, only travelling to Kent at the weekends to see Maggie. This is why our sneaking off to see each other, wasn’t always easy to do.

  “Mrs Montgomery” I asked again with a slight shrill in my tone. My patience had worn thin over the last couple of days and I couldn’t hold my tongue anymore as the line was still silent.

  “What the hell is going on? Where is Maggie” I blurted down the phone as anger took a hold of me like a glove squeezing me until there was nothing left. I needed some answers. I started to pace again as Rafi stood near me to offer his support. I was trying to grasp what Maggie’s mom was playing at. I really didn’t care about anythi
ng else. I just needed to know what was going on and why Maggie wasn’t answering my calls. We hadn’t had an argument or a tiff, unless her parents have tried to intervene again. That can’t be though, Maggie wants to be with me as much I want to be with her. That thought kept circling through my mind. She would never leave me. She loves me too. So why was I suddenly questioning myself now. I shook the thoughts away. Until I got some answers I couldn’t assume or predict Marilyn’s silence as anything, not yet anyways.

  A sob came loud down the line and echoed through the entire room. My heart sank. In all the years I had known Maggie’s mother, she had never once sobbed or even shown the slightest emotion of being upset. This was throwing me through a loop because if she was sobbing, it had something to do with Maggie.

  My Maggie.

  “I don’t know where she is,” she whispered, her voice sounding strained. As if she was on the verge of breaking down from all the emotions clogging her throat.

  “She’s gone” she added, when another sob ran through the line, I couldn’t even register what she was saying. I looked over at my bedside table where Maggie’s picture stood, smiling up at me. Maggie’s eyes held mine for a moment. How the hell could she be gone?

  “What the hell do you mean? By. Gone” I shouted down the line. I was starting to get pissed and the anger was seeping into my veins. I just wanted a straight answer. Had she run away? Had she been hurt? Had someone taken her? Every scenario was running through my mind. My world was collapsing in front of my eyes. Without Maggie, there was just no point anymore. I felt sick. My breath was at the back of my throat trying to escape but trapped by my thoughts of Maggie.

  My Maggie.

  I tried to rain in my emotions, but that was proving to be difficult. I wanted to ask so many questions. I finally found my calm voice and asked what I feared most. Confirmation.

  “What do you mean by gone, Marilyn?” I asked as quietly and calmly as I could, trying to hide my contempt for her. Her sobbing finally subsided into quieter sobs as she took a few breaths and answered as calmly as she could.

  “She’s just gone, her stuff, some money, but there was blood in the drive way Edward……. they think she’s been kidnapped” choking on those final words that made her start to sob again.

  I had no words. I just stared into space. I didn’t know how to answer. Or how to feel. Maggie was everything to me. The way she smiled. The way she laughed and her little quirky ways of soothing me. I couldn’t lose her. I wouldn’t lose her. Not now. Not ever. I was stood by her picture now, running my fingers over the glass that held her face. I looked into her eyes dancing in the picture and promised her then and there, that I’d find her. I’d always find her. My emotions were all over the place, but Maggie is what drove me forward. I had known that since we met. She was light to a moth, I couldn’t stay away. She guided me, led me through the dark and made me want her, love her, need her. I wouldn’t stop until I had her back where she belonged. With me.

  “I’m on my way” I barked into the phone and flicked it off. Slamming my fist into the closest wall. Smashing my knuckles again and again until the pain registered. Anger, frustration coated my entire body like a new skin, one that I would need to face her parents and actually find out what the hell was going on. Rafi was waiting patiently for an explanation with a concerned look, that held sympathy, but more than anything else, concern for Maggie.

  “Let’s go, if I drive I can get us there in fifty minutes” he offered quickly, skirting through our room for his keys and wallet while he slipped on his trainers and jacket. I was glad he was here, when I made the call to Maggie’s mother and for the support he had just offered. Rafi was the only friend I trusted with knowing about me and Maggie. Other people just didn’t understand what our relationship meant. It was complicated for sure, but nothing worth doing is ever easy. That’s what my gramps always told me anyways. Rafi had decided to apply to Cambridge, the same as me. I didn’t get the choice but at least we could dorm together. He had gone against his mother’s wishes of him attending an American university. At least Cambridge fitted the criteria that Rafi’s mother had expected. Heritage. Prestige. Rafi didn’t fit in a gilded cage like the one is mom wanted him to fit into. I was thankful at this moment that he had gone against her. He had always had my back, but when it came to Maggie, he loved her just as much as me. We had grown up together. He understood why I would want to belong to her and her alone. We had this dynamic when growing up. Rafi was from the same town, even though mine and Maggie’s parent’s lived in ostentatious homes with numerous staff. Rafi came from good stock, money and prestige but as our families were all for show, his family were inseparable both at home and at business. Making Rafi feeling pressured and isolated. Rafi followed me through University and into business because he knew I wouldn’t force him to do anything he didn’t want to. Just like my parents, Rafi’s didn’t seem interested in what he wanted either.

  Erin - 2004

  My head hurt, pounding like a jack hammer was busy at work in there. I felt strange, dizzy in fact. A mist of fog settled over me like I was half between sleep and being awake. The light was beckoning me forward. I smelt an unfamiliar scent of sterile cream and a disinfectant smell strong like bleach. It infiltrated my nostrils and tugged them with force. It was unpleasant. I wanted to stay wrapped up in the warmth and peace that had me blanketed. I tried licking my lips, but my mouth was dry, too dry like I hadn’t drank water in a few weeks or months even. I kept my eyes tightly shut, but I was aware of the sounds around me and the constant beep of a machine that was in perfect rhythm. The soothing sound was familiar and a sense of calm and peace washed over me. My body ached and I was sore all over as if I’d been in a fight or something. I opened my eyes slowly as the light from the window was blinding. My eyes took a few seconds to come into focus as I glanced around the cream room and noticed the machine that was emitting the beeping noise I recognised. The wires were attached to my chest, a heart monitor I thought, reaching up and placing my hand over the monitor wires making the noise muffled. My thoughts were unclear though, out of focus.

  Where was I?

  It looked like a private room with cream blinds hanging along the large window to the right of my room. There was a table at the bottom of the bed with a jug of water on and a chart. My chart, I thought.

  “Look who’s awake” A slim women stated as she entered the room, surprising me. She wore a green smock with a name tag on positioned to the left, saying Molly in bold letters. She wore her blonde hair scraped back into a bun with a hint of brown underneath. She reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

  “Where am I?” I asked. My voice cracking at the end making my throat ache. I reached up and stroked my throat gently. It felt like I had swallowed shards of glass that cut every inch instinctively.

  “Here hunny” Molly offered me a glass of water that I quickly took. I gulped at the cold refreshment that soothed my throat but didn’t quench the thirst I seemed to have

  “More” I asked trying to catch my breath. I coughed hard as the water had trouble slipping down my throat.

  “Easy there, sweetie. Take it easy, you’ve been out for a couple of weeks. Your body won’t be able to take too much liquid, not just yet” Molly informed me softly, patting my shoulder.

  I’ve been out two weeks?

  What did she mean by out?

  I didn’t understand?

  I searched the room for something familiar, but couldn’t place anything. The room was very plain. I checked myself over. I didn’t seem to have any injuries. My dark blonde hair was tied at the back and hung around the side. Everything seemed to be in working order. I noticed a large round ring with a large brownish, orangish stone on my third finger of my left hand. I stared at the pretty colours that reflected the light around the room. It was beautiful, but where had it come from? I couldn’t remember anything. Remembering what the nurse said, I turned towards and asked.

  “I don�
��t understand, what do you mean out?”

  “You’ve been in a coma for two weeks. Your body was repairing itself. Sometimes the mind shuts itself down so it can repair the damage and recover before it allows you to become conscious again. This is a lot to take in, just rest for now and I’ll go find the doctor for you” Her voice held concern, setting my body on edge. What the hell happened to me if I had to recover for two weeks? The doctor better have some good answers because I sure as hell didn’t.

  “Don’t look so worried, everything’s fine sweetie” Molly added trying to reassure me. The concern was still etched on her elegant face. I could tell that she wasn’t telling me everything.

  I was a blank slate, whatever happened I couldn’t remember what it was or how it happened either. I looked over my body again. I looked ok under the thick blankets swaddled around me. Nothing felt broken at least, but my entire body ached and longed for rest. My eyes felt heavy and I relented to close them, as I drifted back to sleep again.

  Chapter One.

  Eddie - Ten years later.

  The room was still dark when I suddenly woke sweating and panting. This had been the first nightmare I’d had in over a month. The sheets were soaked and my body felt heavy with a thick blanket of sweat. I dreamt of Maggie's sweet face most nights, tugging me into her sweet body and telling me everything would be fine. This one had been so real and more intense than the last one. Chains and gags surrounding her tear stained face. Her dark blonde hair falling limp around her shoulders, with her shoulders slumped forward. Someone was standing behind her. I couldn't see their face, I never could. Only the smug smile that made me want to wrap my hands around their neck to squeeze every ounce of life out of their body. I reached for her. Holding out my hand every time, wanting to grasp onto something, anything. To make sure she was alive, but there was no reprieve from this. I woke up every time with damp sheets wrapped around my legs, grasping at some kind of outer reality, where my Maggie was back. In my arms and safe.