Finding Erin

by America Leigh

  “I think I’ll just do that Alex” Nodding my agreement to his suggestion.

  “Great, give me two minutes and I will be back with your order”

  Alex returned with a large box offering to help me to my car with my takeaway. I thanked him and made my way to the car. I headed towards home. I had so much to tell Faith, Justice and Peace. Where was I going to start? The fact that he had seemed way to familiar to be an utter stranger or the fact that my body sang for the multi-billionaire. I went for the meeting worried that the deal was going to be rejected or postponed, but now I had so much more to worry about.

  Stupid hormones.

  Why couldn’t my body react more appropriately than to my gay boss?

  * * *

  “You’re shitting me right” Justice burst out in fits of laughter, with half her mouth still full of chocolate cake. When I got home, I had texted all the girls to meet me at the house, within fifteen minutes we were hovered around the full chocolate cake Alex had deviously suggested I take and I was telling them about my meeting with Edward Vance.

  “No” I whispered, embarrassment creeping into my cheeks.

  “Wait. Let me get this straight, not only did you get all hot and flirty with Mr I’m all hot and surly but you think you knew him from before. I thought the doctors said that was impossible?”

  “They did” I admitted, stumped at my own suggestion.

  “I’ve never known you to talk about a guy full stop, never mind have a full on lady boner after meeting one,” Justice chuckled out. Her face was has red as her hair.

  “Justice” we all admonished instinctively, filling the kitchen full of laughter. I never got old of Justice’s potty mouth. Sometimes she still could even surprise me. I held my sides. I don’t think I have ever laughed so hard.

  “Seriously though. Is this for real?” Peace asked warily. Out of all of us, Peace worried the most. She was the quiet and sensitive one that was always careful. It was one of the many things I loved her for.

  “Yeah, I think so. I really don’t understand my reaction to him, but I have this niggling feeling that he’s familiar wouldn’t leave me. I’ve never had that before. With you guys, I have this strong bond that became stronger over time, but my reaction to Edward was off the chart as soon as I saw him. When he asked me to call him Eddie, I nearly fainted.” Shaking my head “I just don’t get it” I admitted, my body sagging in defeat. I realised my rant had silent tears flowing down my face in full force. The forlorn looks on the girls’ faces made me cry harder. They huddled around me, giving me their strength and support.

  I wiped my tears and swallowed hard. The girls sat back, waiting for me to talk. Maybe I was being silly and exaggerating the feelings that Eddie brought out in me. His gentle touch had set my body alight and even though I was trying to talk myself out of what I had just told the girls, I stood by it. Eddie was different, absolutely, completely and dramatically different. But what did I do with that?

  “So what do I do?” I asked. All three of my best friends looked up in surprise. They looked at each other, scared to even suggest anything. This was major, feeling something beyond the reality of waking up with no memory was huge and all four of us were feeling the repercussions of it.

  Justice smile broadened and simply said “You embrace it, honey” As if it was that simple, cocking her eyebrow at me. Justice lived life to the full and everything was at full pelt. Her hair, her clothes, her attitude, that’s why we love her. She is the one who makes us live our life to the full, instead of hiding behind our pasts.

  “And wither in pleasure beneath him” Justice added, in a husky voice full of innuendo. “shppppfttt ughughugh” I heard Faith gasp as coffee spurted all over the place. I chuckled. Faith’s face had turned blotchy and red. My heart lifted. This was why I loved these girls so much, they made me smile when we didn’t have much to smile about.

  “Justice” I scolded. The smile on my face didn’t chastise her like I had intended it to. Instead I could feel my face flushed and hot with embarrassment. Justice winked and chuckled at my response. I couldn’t believe she just said that. Jesus. I wasn’t sure if I was more shocked at her suggestion or the fact that my slutty mind had already navigated down that route. I couldn’t help it. His broad shoulders and muscles that were hidden by his fitted shirt screamed for me to see what was underneath. I wondered if he tasted as good has he smelled.

  “Come on, we all know you were thinking it. It’s written all over your face honey. All the hot and glory details can be read in those innocent cheeks of yours” Justice mocked well naturedly. She was right, but I wasn’t about to admit it. The way I feel about Eddie was like a blast of cold water shocking me to my core. Whatever this was, I knew I wouldn’t walk away from this familiar feeling. I just had to find out what the hell that meant for my future and if that had a connection to my past. Justice gave me those fierce violet Eyes, challenging me to deny what she already knew. I frowned at her.

  “Fine” I said petulantly. I screwed my face up and sighed in defeat. “I may have thought of Eddie that way”

  “Pleassssse” Justice retorted. “Your body is still humming from your reaction to him, I can see it zipping off you like roles of electric ribbons” Her words held a sincerity that was new for Justice, her snarky humour cloaked by the size of her heart. There was longing in her tone. We all felt reluctant to let anyone anywhere near us, to form any kind of emotional connection with the baggage we each held. That was one of the reasons we became so close. We protected each other from what we each feared.

  “She’s right, Erin” Faith admitted. “Something has changed from when you left the house this morning to coming back in this afternoon. Whatever Eddie is doing to you, is a good thing in my book. Maybe he’s who you’ve been holding out for” Faith admitted and then wiggled her eyebrows suggestively at me. What the hell had gotten into these girls? I looked over at Peace, who was sat with a sullen look on her face. Peace’s quiet nature had scared me when we were younger. I couldn’t always read her moods back then, but ten years had done wonders for reading her expressions. Peace hated change more than the rest of us, she always reverted back into herself when things went south. Even if it wasn’t a bad change, it didn’t matter. I knew little about Peace’s past. I knew she had been neglected and left broken by something that had changed her life forever. I looked around at the girls that were closer than sisters could ever be. I would be lying if I said we knew every little secret we each possessed, but that didn’t matter. We stood side by side, just as families did, but this was by choice.

  I reached over to grasp Peace’s hand, squeezing it lightly. She gave me a tight smile. I knew words wouldn’t change any of her doubts or insecurities, so I didn’t give her any, I gave her my support instead. The silence was deafening. We each worried over what my reaction to Eddie meant exactly.

  “So what now” Faith asked quietly.

  “Nothing”

  “What do you mean nothing?” Faith asked looking bewildered.

  “I will not worry about something that may or may not happen” I admitted, shrugging my shoulders at Faith. I suddenly loss my appetite, looking down at the half eaten piece of chocolate heaven. All of this talk of things changing were setting my nerves on edge and I wasn’t the only one. I looked over at Peace who was staring down at her feet.

  Chapter Five.

  Eddie.

  The large black table creaked under the pressure, the indentation of ware and tare were apparent and becoming more noticeable every day. The additional two hundred and fifty pounds of hard muscle that held his six foot four frame made the table cry out in protest. Rhode’s large hands dug deeper into the oak with every passing minute. This current threat was becoming increasingly more frustrating for Rhodes. Just the week before we had cleared every possible threat and misdemeanour to fully protect Maggie from our past. The problem is, that we weren’t really sure if it was the past or the present threatening to attack her this time, but I w
asn’t going to take any more chances. I had already placed enough security on Maggie fit for the queen. The easier option would be to tell her and then remove her from this other life she had and lock her up in an ivory tower. I had to smart about this. Maggie would have never allowed me to do that before and I’m sure to hell that the Erin I met earlier wouldn’t let me either. I would probably get a couple of black eyes and a groin injury for my troubles. Erin was all spit and fire sizzling under the surface and the specs of caramel that ran through her eyes burned with passion, desire and unadulterated lust. The attraction between us was undeniable.

  “Quit breaking my fucking table Rhodes and clue me in. Is she in danger again?

  “Have I put her in danger?” I asked again. My voice cracking at the end. What if I caused this latest threat and endangered Maggie. I was supposed to be protecting her, not bringing the threat closer and potentially getting her killed. I couldn’t last another ten years without her in my arms, feeling the warmth and caress of her under my palms. I had to know she was safe in my arms.

  “Asshole” Rhodes mumbled under his breath. This was the worst part of being friends with the people you employed because there was a fine line between work and personal, especially being a Vance. Maggie was personal, this threat was personal. Me, Rhodes and Rafi had searched for the last five years for Maggie and now we couldn’t even decipher a simple threat to protect her. The feeling that I was powerless had followed me since Maggie had gone and now that Maggie was back, I felt even more powerless than before.

  “A computer virus was sent to Social Services database to corrupt and disable the protocols of the documentation held on previous charges of state. These files consist of all data prior to being released as an adult into society. The thing is, this file consists of their habits, blood type, state of entry into the system and other indicators that could enable social services to find a decent and stable home for a child, especially one at this late stage of adolescence. “

  “Has any files been leaked, can we confirm?” I asked cutting Rhodes off mid flow.

  “No sir, the firewall bounced the feedback through the virus it had already created and couldn’t fully implement any changes to the database. This is not saying that they didn’t receive any additional accompanied files that were essential to the assessment of these young girls. The slightest detail could lead anyone of them to Maggie and then we would be pissing in the dark” Rhodes admitted on a growl.

  “What exactly are you getting at Ellerson” I spat between gritted teeth. The uneasiness of the situation made me want to tear someone apart. The anger was pulsating off of Rhodes and my interference was making the situation more severe.

  “You know what the hell I’m saying Eddie. Surveillance. Wires and security and backup” Rhodes said in a sharp tone, standing up and folding his arms across his solid frame. His dark hair was dishevelled and his grey eyes held a darkness that I hadn’t seen since he came back from war. This breach of security had him on edge. We were in the dark and until we could figure out what the hell was going on we had to protect Maggie at all cost.

  “Do whatever needs to be done Rhodes. I mean anything to keep Maggie safe. I can’t lose her again”

  “I will.” Rhodes walked over and squeezed my shoulder before leaving my office. Rhodes wasn’t one to show emotion like most men, but I put that down to the marine in him.

  What the hell do I do now?

  I stared at my computer screen. I was waiting for Rafi to return from his meetings to tell him about seeing Maggie.

  “Mr Vance, I have your father on line one” Elaine’s concerned voice came through the intercom.

  “Put him through.”

  “What do you want old man?” I said into the phone, not bothering with pleasantries. The laboured breathing on the other end of the line was the only indication that the line had connected.

  “Well? What do you want dad?”

  “Your mother wanted me to remind you of the gala next Friday. She wanted me to make sure you were still going to attend as planned.” He said in a non-committal tone.

  “Why didn’t Mom ring me then?” I asked, rolling my eyes into the phone. My father never made a call if he didn’t have a hidden agenda. One thing I have learnt about my father over the years is that he hated to lose control over his assets and I came under that distinction. I was a pawn to his power game. His communication company was one of the largest independently owned corporations worldwide. When my business started to take off, he tried to sabotage my client base and contact list. He just made me work that much harder. After losing Maggie, he was determined to mould me into him, trying to use my loss to bring me into the fold and keep me in line. The more he demanded control over me, the more I rebelled. His persistence was constantly biting him in the arse.

  “Well?” I was growing impatient of his bullshit.

  “I wanted to talk…”

  “No.” I cut him off.

  “My decision to your offer to buy the communications division is not up for discussion and will never be. Anyways, that’s Rafi’s department and you know how he is with his possessions. He’s worse than you and I combined.”

  “This your final word on that matter?” he asked, returning to the harsh businessman that I’ve always been subjected to. His motto was to be the best.

  As soon as I had uttered the word Yes, the line went dead. It’s funny how he only calls when he wants something in return. He can’t even have a normal conversation with his own son. Ridiculous but undeniably true.

  I quickly dialled my Mom’s number and waited.

  “Hello dear” she answered with a happy tone. My mother had several tones she reserved for phone calls. Her happy tone, as I called it, was when she was acting as if we were one big happy family. Her bullshit had become as patronizing as my father’s, consistently trying to reign me in. I suppose you could say my family was old fashioned. They believed if you were born into money then you should act that part and takeover the family business when necessary. As if we were born superior than other people, even though they never asked me if that’s the life that I wanted. They didn’t have the first clue about me. What I wanted or needed. After Maggie was taken from me, no one could use her as leverage anymore. My relationship with Maggie was Edmund’s constructive ploy to keep me loyal and pliable to his will, but when Maggie had disappeared I had nothing left to lose. They supported our relationship at the start, as long as it kept me in line with their plan for me. I wanted to show them all, I was so much more than just a Vance.

  “Don’t dear me, Mom. Why did I just receive a call about the gala, when I had already told you I would be attending? I won’t be a pawn in your game mother. I already told you I didn’t want him calling me again. He only calls me when he wants something from me. You do the same for one of your little social functions.”

  “Edward, don’t use that tone with me” Her light and airy tone turning into the stern tone I remember from my childhood. She was another pawn in my Edmund’s game. She had natural blonde hair and pure green eyes compared to my dark looks that matched my fathers. My dark eyes didn’t resemble either of my parents.

  “Don’t Mom. I’m sick of this pretence. Next time you want something just ring my assistant or send me a frigging email because I’m done with this bullshit. I will maintain my appearances for the Vance charities but apart from that. I’m done, do I make myself clear. I’m done. You and Edmund can go and toy with someone else’s fucking life.”

  I was breathing heavy by the time I hung up on her. I hated I had to play this game with them. My relationship with either of them was difficult. I have kept my distance from both of them for months and as soon as Maggie comes back into my life, so does my parents. This gala had come at the worst possible time. The gala was the biggest function for the elite of the business world that supported the Melody Foundation. It was the only function I was fully committed to. It supported children like Molly with a life threatening heart condition that ei
ther cut their life short or restricted their living. I sighed in frustration. I had thought things were turning a corner and then something reels me back in, keeping me in their invisible restraints.

  “Mr Vance, your two o’clock is here”

  “Send them in Elaine”

  The rest of the afternoon flew by, one meeting turned into another. I tried not to think about the gala or the ramifications of actually being in the same room as both my parents. I thought of Maggie and her long flowing hair and the curves she tried to hide under those skinny jeans and figure hugging tank. The shape of her perky breasts and the sliver of skin just above her jeans kept peeking out when she moved. Just thinking about her made me hard. Her supple lips were soft and screamed for me to kiss them, possess them, and take them over and over again.

  “You’re screwed you know that right” Rafi’s voice drifted from the doorframe. I looked up at the smirk on his face. His body was relaxed and he looked more in control than he had last week. His dark jeans and his favourite blue t-shirt clung to his still thin frame but fitted better, he was obviously eating better than before our break.

  “Hello to you to?”

  “Don’t give me that Eddie?” Rafi chuckled at me.

  “Give you what?” I asked innocently.

  “You know full well?” shooting me a sceptical look.

  “Do I?” I challenged.

  “Yes you do, so stop with the bullshit and dodging my fucking question?”

  Glancing over at Rafi’s frustrated face. I decided to take pity on him. “Yeah I am totally screwed, I do know that. But I knew that at fifteen so it doesn’t really matter, does it? I knew that I would only love her and only her forever. That hasn’t changed and I don’t think it ever will. She is the only one I have ever wanted. I looked at her today and my body hummed at her just being near. I need her to breath. I need her to live and I need her to give me my life back.”