Love on the Free Side

by Mariah Ankenman

  Ironic, shameful, and sad, but there it was. Knowing better didn’t help. She still held onto the pain like a lifeline, to remind herself never to open her heart so freely again.

  Some psychologist she was.

  “Good, then if you’ll excuse me.”

  For a moment, she feared he wouldn’t move. A tormented expression came over his face, and for one heart-stopping moment, dread filled her at the thought of him trying to talk to her about what happened between them so many years ago. She couldn’t deal with that right now, and especially not in front of Maggie and Lizzy who she knew were avidly listening from their table a few feet away. But then he nodded, stepping to the side.

  She released a breath, hurrying past him and out the door—her heart and mind wondering if she’d made a huge mistake by coming back home.

  Chapter 4

  What the hell is Jamie doing back in Peak town?

  Tony turned back to the two women who weren’t trying at all to hide their eavesdropping.

  “Excuse me for a moment.”

  Unsure of what exactly he was doing, he hurried out the shop door after Jamie. The glimpse of pain that flashed in her eyes when she first saw him ripped through his chest, gutting him. She covered her emotions quickly, but he’d seen it. He also noticed how, in all the time they’d been apart, her beauty had only grown. Jamie had always been the most beautiful girl in the world to him, and the years had been very kind to her. Her dark brown hair hung shorter than she used to wear it, just below her chin. He wondered if the strands would still feel as silky if he ran his fingers through the locks like he used to do.

  “Jamie, wait,” he called to her retreating back.

  Much to his surprise she stopped. He came to a halt a foot away. Crowding her didn’t seem like a great idea at the moment, no matter how much he wanted to step closer, to feel the soft touch of her skin again, see if she still wore that subtle cherry blossom fragrance that captivated him. To this day, even the slightest smell of cherry blossom made his body tighten with need at the memory of her.

  Her shoulders tensed before she turned to face him, a polite, cold smile on her face. Damn. He hated seeing it there. She had always been such a happy, bubbly person. He had no idea who this cold, detached woman was, but it wasn’t Jamie.

  Dismay hit him hard as he realized her stony attitude might only be for his benefit. Couldn’t blame her; he hadn’t handled their parting in the best way.

  “Yes? What is it, Tony?”

  Cold, polite, indifference. Not the girl he remembered at all.

  “I really am sorry. I had no idea you’d be at the shop or even in town. I didn’t mean to surprise you…and upset you.”

  She huffed out a breath of annoyance. “You didn’t upset me. It was just…I didn’t realize you were home.”

  “I’m not.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets to keep himself from reaching out to her. “Not really. I’m only here for the summer to help my uncle.”

  Her eyes softened at the mention of his relative. “How is Juan? I hadn’t heard he’d been injured. Is it very bad?”

  There was the girl he knew. The kind, sweet woman who cared about the people around her and never wanted to see harm come to anyone.

  “A horse bucked him and messed up his knee. He’s in good spirits, but pissed as hell about missing work for the next few months.”

  She chuckled. God how he’d missed that sound.

  “Yes, that sounds like your uncle. Never did like to sit idle, did he?”

  Nope. No one in his family had ever done well with leisure time. They enjoyed themselves and their lives, but his abuela always told him nothing felt as good as a hard day’s work.

  “I’d love to catch up with you while we’re both in town. Maybe grab a bite to eat?”

  Small white teeth nibbled on her bottom lip. He knew what that meant. Years ago, Jamie had often bitten her lip when nervous. The sexy little move drove him crazy back then. Based on the tightening in his pants, it still did.

  “I…don’t think that’s such a good idea. I’m very busy at the moment with the camp and everything—”

  “Camp?”

  For a moment, it appeared as though she wasn’t going to answer his question, but then she straightened, throwing her shoulders back with a practiced smile. Sweet Jamie, always too polite to turn and walk away from a conversation, even if it was painfully clear she wanted to.

  “I’m opening an equine therapy ranch right here in Peak Town. We’re going to have summer camps for troubled youths and other services available year round for veterans and other people in need.”

  “Horse therapy?”

  She tilted her chin in the air, arms crossing. “Yes. Service animals are no longer relegated to dogs. I knew a man once who had a service Iguana.”

  A lizard? How the heck could a reptile help someone in need?

  “You’d be amazed at how well horses are at reading people’s emotions. They can connect on a very deep level, and the care required teaches valuable lessons as well as providing a bonding experience which can reach levels of emotional growth regular therapy can’t.”

  “I wasn’t doubting your mission.” He’d never doubted anything this woman did, ever. She was the most determined person he’d ever met. “In fact, I’m impressed.”

  “You are?” She raised a skeptical brow.

  He kicked up the corner of his lips in a half-smile. “I always knew you’d do amazing things to help others, Jamie. Sounds like you’ve accomplished quite a lot.”

  Round cheeks flushed pink, her freckles growing more pronounced with the blush. “Oh, I don’t know. It really wasn’t that hard once I had all the proper permits and licenses in place. It’s nothing like opening two of the most successful restaurants in New York City.”

  “You’ve kept up with me?” Selfish bastard that he was, it pleased him to know she maintained tabs on him. These days, anything could be found with a quick web search, but you had to have the inclination to do it. The simple fact Jamie knew his business holdings meant she had looked him up. The interest still called to her. Years ago, he broke her heart, he should not be happy she still thought of him, but he was.

  I think of her often enough.

  Every single day to be precise.

  “Oh, um, I saw some article online or something.” The blush grew, spreading over her face to the tips of her ears.

  He loved how open she was, emotions out there for all to see. She never could hide things well. Her fair skin always gave her away.

  “Anyway, I really do have to get going, but please give your uncle my regards. I hope his recovery is swift.”

  “I will. Perhaps we can bump into each other again while I’m in town.”

  She didn’t respond, simply nodded, turned, and headed back down the street.

  “Goodbye, bonita.”

  He’d uttered the words softly, but judging from her stumble on the sidewalk, she heard them. Small hands clenched into tiny fists as she made her way down the street and away from him.

  There was the Jamie he remembered—quick to blush and also quick to anger. The woman wore her heart on her sleeve. Which was, perhaps, why it had been so easy for him to crush it.

  Dammit. He hated the memories of their past. He’d never, ever wanted to hurt her, but he’d known, even at the tender age of twenty, that he would have brought Jamie down. She wouldn’t be where she was today—an amazing woman opening up a place that would help many people who desperately needed it—if he had stayed in her life. He’d been a distraction she couldn’t afford, but had been unwilling to give up.

  So, he’d taken himself out of the equation.

  And it still stung like a sonofabitch.

  He turned, heading back to the cupcake shop. Even knowing it was a bad idea, deep inside, he eagerly anticipated the next encounter with this new, yet familiar, Jamie Thompson.

  ****

  “Tío, I’m back.” Tony shut the front door of his uncle’s apartment.
Box of cupcakes in hand, he made his way to the living room where his uncle sat on the couch, right where he’d left him. Scowl on his face, remote in hand. “I see you’re enjoying yourself.”

  “What the hell do people see in these stupid talk shows?” Smashing the power button with a large, wrinkled finger, he tossed the remote aside. “I can’t stand this crap. Selfish people who have probably never worked a hard day in their life going on and on about stupid crap. Makes my ass itch.”

  And with that lovely image embedded in his brain, Tony placed the box on the coffee table.

  His uncle leaned forward, wincing when the move pulled at his injured leg. Even so, a smile quickly creased the old man’s face as he glanced up. “Those Maggie’s?”

  “Yup. She sends her well wishes along with Lizzy and…”

  With a cupcake halfway to his lips, his curious relative raised one brow. “And?”

  He cleared his throat. “Jamie Thompson is back in town. I ran into her at the cupcake shop today.”

  “That so?” He shoved half a Lemon Drop Dreamcake into his mouth, chewed, and swallowed before continuing. “Always did like that girl. Smart as a whip and pretty to boot.”

  No arguments from him on those points.

  “She’s opening a horse therapy ranch to help troubled youths and veterans.”

  “Damn fine thing to be doing. Knew she’d do something great with her life.”

  So did he. Jamie’s cause was so benevolent it made him slightly shameful of his own monetary pursuits. Two upscale restaurants, which catered to the rich and famous. Sure, he gave to charity, but did he do anything in his life’s work to actually help anyone?

  A grunt sounded from the couch as the stubborn old man tried to rise.

  “Tío, what are you doing?”

  “Need a drink. These cupcakes are delicious, but I need something to wash them down.”

  He looked at the coffee table to see his uncle had gone through half the box already. Hiding a chuckle, he held up a hand.

  “Sit. I will get you something. Water? Milk?”

  “Beer.”

  A shudder ran though him. “Cupcakes and beer?”

  “Shut up and get me the damn drink.”

  He hated seeing his uncle so out of sorts. Being forced to rest and depend on others was not something the fiercely independent man was taking well. Ignoring the uncharacteristic harshness, he complied, hearing the other man say softly, “I hate being useless.”

  “You are not useless. The doctor told you to rest and recover. You’ll heal faster if you do.” He held out the beer.

  “I know what the doctor said, Tony.” A hand, roughened from years of ranch work, grabbed the outstretched longneck bottle. “I just hate being a burden.”

  “You’re not a burden. Family never is.” Taking a seat on the chair next to the sofa, he gazed into his uncle’s eyes. “You got me to where I am today. Without your help who knows where I’d be.”

  Thinning, dark hair ruffled as the man who’d been the only father figure he’d ever known shook his head.

  “You would have been fine. You are smart and a hard worker, like your madré.”

  A sharp stab of pain sliced though his heart as it always did when reminded of his mother, and his biggest regret—not being able to bring her to America before she passed.

  “She’d be proud of you.”

  He wasn’t too sure about that.

  His skepticism must have shown on his face because his uncle pressed. “She would have, Tony. Two successful restaurants in the heart of New York City? That is impressive.”

  “I used to think so, but lately, I’m not so sure.”

  His uncle said nothing, just waited, sipping his beer.

  “When I worked for Maggie, I knew the people enjoying my work. Even the tourists would stop and chat for a bit. I felt a connection there, a…sense of purpose.”

  It had been a long time since he felt a true, driving resolve about anything in his life. Connections now pertained to business deals, not people. He missed cooking for those he cared about, not just critics

  “Your abuela always said, ‘The measure of one’s life isn’t in your bank account, but the amount of love you surround yourself with.’ ”

  His grandmother had been a smart woman.

  “When was the last time something brought you joy?”

  Tony raised a brow. “You injure your knee and now suddenly you’re a therapist?”

  Wrinkled face turning red, he coughed into his drink. “No. There’s…this nurse at the hospital who talked to me while I was getting fixed up. She likes to talk about feelings and shit like that, but she’s nice, and pretty…” The rest of the words trailed off into mumbles.

  Holy shit—was his uncle actually blushing? He didn’t think the old man could do that. Could the tough as nails ranch foreman have a crush on a nurse? Taking him to the hospital for therapy just got a whole lot more interesting.

  It’d be nice if his uncle had found someone to make him happy. The old guy deserved it more than anyone. He’d worked hard his whole life, sending money back home to his mother and sister. Without him, Tony’s life could have taken a very different path. If anyone deserved love, Uncle Juan did.

  Imagining the tough old guy cozying up to a pretty nurse made him think of another pretty face, one with cool brown eyes and a round little nose that stuck up in the air when she tried to get her point across. Something ached deep in his chest; he rubbed at the spot, but he knew the phantom pain wasn’t of the physical nature. What ailed him was pure emotion. A big, stinking, messy pile of it, and one he didn’t have time for at the moment. He was here to help his uncle. End of story.

  Still, as he grabbed the remote—picking a sports channel to avoid another rant—he wondered if something still burned between him and Jamie. Sure as hell seemed like it from the jolt of heat that ran through his body at the sight of her today.

  Doesn’t matter.

  Even if there was still some latent feelings there, he’d hurt her, badly. He doubted Jamie Thompson would ever give him a second chance. No matter how much he yearned for one.

  Chapter 5

  Jamie set her cell on the desk and let out a sigh of frustration. If one more thing went wrong she might just run off to the Bahamas.

  You knew opening this place wouldn’t be easy.

  She told her inner self to take a long hike off a short cliff. Yes, she knew going in this would be no simple task. Opening a business was difficult no matter what type of trade you were in, but she hadn’t expected to run into so many fires this late in the game. Her licenses were all secured, the property was procured, and the staff’s background checks all came out clean as a whistle. Every big item passed with flying colors.

  But the little things seemed to be falling through the cracks. The website kept crashing. Her IT gal was on it, but apparently, there was some new bug floating around the web, and it might take a week to get everything up and running again. A week in Internet time equated to years in real life. Without a web presence, you had no business. Sally assured she was working as fast as she could, but even the Ivy League computer geek could only do so much.

  In addition to her Internet woes, the wiring needed a serious going over by an electrician judging by the flickering lights throughout the house, and the property turned out to be…less move-in ready than she anticipated. In all fairness, Melissa had warned her the place would need some “elbow grease” when she handed over the key. She guessed that was loan officer talk for “hasn’t been cleaned in a decade.” No matter. The staff wouldn’t be arriving until next week, and with Sally on the website issue, Jamie had plenty of time to roll up her sleeves and muck up all the grime. Manual labor wasn’t her favorite chore in the world, but she wasn’t above picking up a broom and mop. If this place was going to work, she needed to put in her all.

  And she desperately wanted this place to work.

  In her second semester of college, she’d taken an intro to psych
class to fulfill a general education requirement. One of the class projects had been to research alternative therapy methods. In her research, she’d run across animal therapy, specifically equine. Being a country girl from a small mountain town, she grew up around the big, beautiful creatures. She’d never had one of her own, but she’d ridden a lot at the various ranches in town, and she knew how to care for them. Never in a million years had she imagined the possibility of using the animals for emotional support.

  Horses were amazing creatures. They were so large and strong. One well-placed kick could kill a man. Yet, they had such a gentle nature. They sensed things deeply. If a storm was brewing, everyone in town knew because the horses would all kick up a fuss. And she’d experienced firsthand how loving they could be. There’d been many a time growing up she’d visited the Denning ranch to ride after a particular hard day at school, and Buttercup, the beautiful Appaloosa she rode, always seemed to know she needed a pick me up. The horse would nuzzle, nibbling at her hair with its slobbery lips until she laughed.

  A light bulb had gone off in her brain after the school project, and she’d suddenly known what she wanted to do with her life. Helping people in need with the creatures she had been raised to love seemed like destiny.

  Life must not have gotten the memo, because at the moment, destiny looked more like doom.

  “Ugh, stop being so melodramatic,” she admonished herself. “It’s just a few hiccups. Nothing major. Now, put on your big girl panties and get to work.”

  Lecture firmly in place, she grabbed her to do list, vowing to get at least a third of it done today, just as her cell phone rang again. Hoping it would be Sally with some good news—unlikely since she just got off the phone with the woman, but hey, a little optimism never hurt anyone—she answered with a cheery greeting.

  “Jamie Thompson?” A deep male voice tinged with a faint British accent—definitely not Sally—carried over the line.