Remember Me

by Jennifer Foor

  Chapter 33

  Shayne

  The sun was shining brightly through the bedroom window, forcing me to open my eyes. The baby monitor was quiet, so I knew I could sleep for a little while longer. That’s when it hit me. I wasn’t alone in my bed.

  Lying next to me was the bravest woman I’d ever known. I rolled over, still unwilling to believe that she was really there. Sure enough, when I’d turned I saw her there, sleeping soundly. When her hair was styled her scars were not noticeable, but since she’d been sleeping on her hair, I could see some of them in her scalp. I suppose I should have been used to them by now. Most certainly they reminded me of all that we’d both been through. I lifted my hand and let my index finger trace over where no hair grew. She turned, wide-eyed to face me. Just seeing those baby-blues made me smile. “Good morning, beautiful.”

  “Hi,” she replied.

  “I still can’t believe you’re here.”

  She nestled her body closer to mine and I took comfort in the warmth it offered. “Me either. I was starting to think that I’d have to live in that hospital for the rest of my life.”

  “Well, we’re real glad you came home to us.” A little pout sounded in the baby monitor and we both smiled. “I’ll be right back.”

  After putting on a pair of boxers, I walked into the hallway and peeked into Eli’s room. He was still fast asleep, so I knew who the early bird had to be. Beka was standing up with tears on her cheeks. She had that little pouty face that reminded me of her mother. “Hey, sunshine. You want to go see mama?”

  “Mama.” Beka had been saying words, but she’d just started repeating certain sounds. I didn’t know if she’d do it again, but I knew one person that would be overjoyed if she’d get to hear it.

  I walked into the master bedroom and sat our ten month old down on the bed then joined her on the opposite side. “Guess what Beka just said?”

  She was focused on her daughter when she answered, “What?”.

  “She said mama.”

  Beka said it again, loud and clear. I watched Ash start to sob, finally getting to experience something, after missing so much. It had been hard for me, experiencing firsts when I knew she’d never get them back. Beka probably had said the word before. She been saying things like baba, dada, and yaya for a while. Maybe she just liked the sound of it and didn’t really understand that it meant mother, but Ash didn’t see it that way. For her, she took it as her daughter remembering who she was.

  Sure, we’d visited her in the hospital, but having her home was different. Our family was complete, finally.

  While lying on my side watching the two of them interacting, I thought about what was next for us. In less than a year we had twins and a house. After all we’d been through, we were finally able to be a normal family, which was something that I never knew I wanted. Now I was certain that there was nothing that I could ever want more.

  While Ash was still recovering, I needed to assure her that I would be by her side for as long as she’d let me. I loved the old Ashley, but the new version of her owned me. She needed to know that, and I knew a way to make it all fall into place.

  My cell phone starting ringing, and since it was a Saturday morning I was a little annoyed. I checked the clocked before noticing it was Ford on the line.

  “This better be good, cuz.”

  “You need to turn on the news, man. Right now. Turn it on channel sixteen.”

  I shot out of bed, looking around for the remote that was sitting on the dresser. After walking over with the phone against my ear, I tuned into the channel and couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

  A picture of Ashley’s dad was in the top corner of the news screen. The reporter was already in mid explanation.

  “… a year long investigation involving some of Maryland’s high ranking officials. Councilman Tilly, along with several other government officials, including the Snow Hill Chief of Police, Wayne Hollerman, and Victor Halethorpe, the County Treasurer are charged in a two-year corruption and money-laundering investigation stretching from Ocean City to Baltimore. We will have more information after the press conference is held today at noon. In other news the highway was completely shut down earlier when a …” I turned the volume down and looked toward Ash, while listening to my cousin on the other end of line.

  “You believe that shit? Did Ash know?”

  “I need to call you back.” I hung up the phone without saying anything, after seeing the scared look in my girlfriend’s eyes. I didn’t know what to say to her. “Ash.”

  “I need to call my mother.”

  I handed her the phone and watched her dialing with tears running out of her eyes. We both had issues with her father, but deep down I knew she still loved him. This was going to be hard for her, whether we had a relationship with him or not.

  I watched as Ash desperately continued to try to reach her mother. It pained me to see her so worried, and a part of me felt scared that something like this could impact her health. Finally, after I’d seen more than I could handle, I grabbed the phone out of her hand. “Baby, let’s take a break. I’m sure that your mom will stop by or call when she can. She could be getting interrogated for all we know. Let’s just try to stay calm until we know the whole story. Remember what the doctor said?”

  She nodded, but continued to cry. “I know, I’m not supposed to stress myself out. How would you be feelin’?”

  I nestled my body beside her, picked up Beka and pulled Ash closer. “I would be actin’ the same way you are. We’re goin’ to get through this, like we always do.” She smiled and looked over at me. Beka was grabbing at her face and laughing, having no knowledge that something bad was going on. “I need to go change her.”

  “Shayne wait,” she said as I started to climb out of the bed. “Can you bring her a clean diaper and clothes in here, so I can do it?”

  I smiled and nodded as I walked out of the room to get the things. While walking back I peeked in the room to see Eli sitting up. He looked like he’d had a rough night from the disturbing look on his face. I caught a whiff of a very shitty diaper as soon as I walked into the room. He never smiled until he was in my arms. “What are you doin’? You stinkin’ up the place?”

  He smiled and said somethin’ in baby talk. “Mommy’s in here with sissy.” We arrived back in my room and I handed over our stinky son. Ash’s face looked shocked when she realized how bad the odor was.

  “Oh my. Eli, you’re a stinky boy.”

  He smiled for her while I climbed back into bed. At the same time we started changing the twins. It was probably weird or gross to some, but this moment was so special to me. Their mother was back home where she belonged. She was safe, and for the most part healthy. She’d get to see her children grow up and they’d never have to be without her.

  After I’d fumigated the bedroom, we headed downstairs and cuddled on the couch, watching the twins play on the floor in front of us. Ash seemed content being around them in any way and I appreciated that she was keeping what was going on with her father from ruining our morning.

  Her mother finally showed up around lunch time. She had another female with her and later explained that reporters had been camped out at their house since last night and she had to sneak out of the back to avoid them.

  She explained that she’d filed for divorce but wasn’t ready to tell anyone. The police had come to her months ago wanting to know her involvement, if any. When she learned about the horrible things he’d been involved in, she wanted nothing to do with him anymore. They asked her to gather them as much information as she could. She’d been feeding them information for their case, but never really knowing if it was going anywhere. Then, without warning, her husband was arrested. She said she didn’t know it was going to happen so fast and wished that she’d had time to prepare Ash. The woman cried, so much that it took her forever to explain.

  I think Ash had mixed feelings, but at the end of it all, she didn’t want her mother going to jail
for something she wasn’t involved in.

  I left the room, allowing them to have some time alone to deal it all. It wasn’t until I heard the front door shut that I knew she’d left. Ash was still sobbing when I came into the room, but she chippered up quite fast. “Sorry for spoilin’ our mornin’ together.”

  I kissed her on the side of her head. “It’s all good, Ash. That couldn’t have been avoided. Besides, you really needed to know.”

  “I still don’t know much. She wouldn’t tell me details and I’m surprised that I could understand her at all. She’s a mess. Now she said she doesn’t even know where to stay. I’m guessin’ she’s goin’ to hide out for a couple of weeks until those reporters go away. Hopefully they won’t come here.”

  “If they do, they’re goin’ to get a shot gun pointed towards them.” I wasn’t meaning to threaten anyone’s lives. I just wanted people to leave Ash alone. She’d been through enough already.

  She grabbed my hand and looked up at me. “I promise you that you don’t have to worry like I know you’re doin’. My dad’s a shady man and I’ve made it clear that I didn’t want to be a part of his life anymore. Sure, it hurts me that the man is crooked, or that he always cared about himself more than me, but I’m dealin’ with it. Shayne, I’ve got a second chance at life, and nothin’ is goin’ to stop me from celebratin’ with you and our children. The only place I need to be is here, with the three of you.”

  She kept that promise, too. Not only did Ash not ask about her father, but I never even saw her watching the news or being upset about it.

  Her first week home was chaotic. She wasn’t prepared for how active the twins got, and in no time at all they had her right where they wanted her. Both Eli and Beka knew how to cry when they wanted something, and Ash couldn’t stand to see them sad.

  Peyton helped out when I was at work, probably praying that she wasn’t losing her babysitting gig and free place to live. Since I’d increased her weekly pay to two-hundred dollars, she was making out pretty well. She paid her car insurance and cell phone bill then pocketed the rest, or maybe she just spent it on clothes or shoes. I never knew with her.

  She’d enrolled herself in two online classes and my parents were over the moon about it. I didn’t tell her this, but we needed her now more than ever before.

  My parents had finally come to terms with everything that had happened. Two weeks after Ash had been home, they took us out to dinner, just the four of us. Ash got dressed up nice and I’d even sent her to have her hair done. I could tell it brightened her spirits getting pampered and pretty. Things were only awkward when we first arrived. Neither of us wanted to say anything, in hopes that they weren’t going to make some plea for us about Parker. I was done dealing with him, and hoped that my father understood that.

  Instead, they asked something entirely different.

  “We asked you two here because we need to address somethin’,” my dad explained. “It seems as though we haven’t been too fair you, Ashley. Shayne’s mother and I felt like we needed to say some things, just so you don’t ever feel uncomfortable around us.”

  I grabbed Ash’s hand under the table and squeezed it, ready to defend her if necessary.

  “What my husband is tryin’ to say is that we’re sorry. We’ve all been young and made mistakes. You lost so much all at once, and that night with Parker was probably somethin’ that you regret but,” she reached over the table and grabbed Ash’s other hand. “you shouldn’t. You were brave, makin’ the decision to be a mother when he walked away. You stood your ground, and with the support of Shayne you were able to become a family.” My mother was starting to cry. It definitely pulled at my heartstrings hearing her. “We didn’t know the whole story, and only judged you from our past knowledge. Families are supposed to stick together, but we’ve done a terrible job for a while now in that department. Please forgive us for that. We love the twins and we’re so proud of what the two of you have accomplished together. You changed our son, and we’re very grateful for that.”

  My dad and I both looked down to avoid eye contact, while Ash and my mother came to terms with their new relationship. Though still skeptical, I felt like it was a step in the right direction.

  The weather had gotten warm again, and Ash was doing better every day. Since we had the perfect yard, we’d decided to have Sunday barbeques and invite the whole family over. Now, Ash, not really being the greatest cook, could make some great desserts. While she was in the kitchen whipping up some banana pudding, I was outside having a couple beers with the guys. It had taken her a while, but she was even up to having Sky and Lacey over. The family was big enough that they didn’t have to be in close proximity if they didn’t want to.

  It just so happened that this cookout I needed everyone there, because I had special plans of my own.

  Once everyone had arrived, and I made them all come out back, I called for Ash to bring me a plate for the meat. I’d made her a little sac to wear on her shoulder for when she had to walk around and needed an extra hand. She came walking out with the help of a four-legged cane and noticed that everyone was quietly standing around watching her.

  I approached and kissed her tenderly before stooping down on one knee. “Ash, we’ve been through a hell of a lot together. Please say you’ll marry me?”

  I opened the small box revealing a dainty diamond emerald-cut, white gold ring surrounded by a tiny row of smaller stones. She held out her hand and nodded, never taking her eyes off of mine.

  When I stood up and kissed her, my redneck family started whistling and hooting all sorts of sexual comments. We ignored them, still caught up in our little moment together. “I will marry you, Shayne,” she said in between our celebratory kisses.

  “I knew you’d say yes.”

  We both laughed, because we knew it was true.

  Chapter 34

  Ashley

  It had been six months since my father was arrested and one week since his trial ended. He was found guilty and sentenced to thirty years in jail. For months he’d been writing me, pleading with me to come visit him.

  I’d been busy planning a wedding, learning to be a mother again, and getting back to perfect health. Still, there was this part of me that needed closure. Unlike my mother, who’d written him off as if she’d never known the man, I felt a pull toward being able to look him in the eyes one last time and express how he’d made me feel.

  Maybe it was a shitty thing to do, but I felt as if I’d been through too much to let him make me feel bad about my life. I’d never been happier and for some reason, maybe just me being selfish, I wanted him to know it.

  On a Saturday, Shayne and I dropped off the kids with his parents and made the drive to Baltimore where he was being held. I’d like to say that I wasn’t nervous, but I’d never even been near a jail before and it petrified me.

  We arrived and got through all of the check points before being seated in the visitor’s area. I got chills when they brought him in, seeing him so disheveled. His hair hadn’t been cut and had started to curl on the ends. It was turning white and he hadn’t shaved his face in so long that he almost had a full beard. He stared at me as he sat down across from us, never acknowledging Shayne beside me. “I can’t believe you’re here.” He reached for my hand, but I pulled away.

  “Believe it, because it’s the only time I’m ever goin’ to come, dad.”

  He looked down, and I felt sorry for him immediately, but that’s what he would want. He’d want to play the sympathy card to get my attention, and I wasn’t going to let him.

  “I’m here because I need closure. I need to tell you once and for all that I deserved more from you.” Shayne pulled his hand away and put on my back. He started rubbing it as I spoke, coaxing me to have the strength to do it. “I deserve to be your daughter, not a pet that you bought a toy for. I needed guidance and love, but never got it from you. I needed a role model to show me how to be independent and honest, but you couldn’t have ever taught me
that, since you didn’t know how to be that person either.”

  “Ashley, please don’t say that. I do love you.”

  I put my hands up, begging for him to stop. “Please, just let me finish. I am sorry for one thing, dad. I’m sorry that my children will never get to know they have another grandfather. I wish that things could have been different, but you made your choice.”

  I stood up, and he began to beg. “Wait. Please don’t go. You don’t understand. I was all you had for so long. I was good to you. I did the best I could after –“

  He paused and I didn’t understand why. “After what?”

  My father put his hands up to his face. “It doesn’t even matter.”

  “This is why I’m walkin’ away.”

  “I see you’re engaged. Congratulations, I guess.”

  I rolled my eyes. “No thanks to you, dad.”

  “You’re right, Ashley. I did and said things that I shouldn’t have done. I was trying to protect you the best way I knew how. I wish you could see that.”

  “Protect me from what? From him?” I pointed to Shayne. “He’s the only person that never gave up on me. Do you know how that makes me feel?”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “Enlighten me.”

  He started to sob, even with a room full of inmates and visitors. I looked at Shayne who seemed completely baffled. “I can’t, Ashley. I can’t talk about it.”

  “Then I guess we’re done here. Take care of yourself, dad. If and when you get out in thirty years, maybe I’ll consider talkin’ to you again.”

  We’d gotten a few steps away from the table when I heard him say something that caused me to freeze in place. “She died, Ashley. Your mother didn’t leave us.”