Crossroads

by Stephen Kenson

  “Let me take care of that.” I said. I stood in front of the window and sent out the call across the depths of the astral plane. When I felt a response, I gathered power to me, holding it with my will like a tightly coiled spring, drawing it tighter and tighter. I narrowed my eyes and brought my hands down, thrusting them out at the ancient brick wall.

  “Shatter!” I yelled and released the power I held. It flowed through me like a lightning bolt, and an invisible wave of power struck the wall with the force of a speeding truck. The casement and brickwork exploded outward, raining in flaming shards down to the street below.

  I gazed out into the night air as it filled with dark smoke and I spoke my command. “Carry us from this place and bring us safely to earth.”

  The wisps of smoke swirled and danced in the cool autumn air and took on a vaguely human-like shape that bowed and spread its arms wide.

  “Jump.” I said to Boom.

  “What are you . .

  “Jump!” I said, and I stepped out into empty air. With only a second’s hesitation, Boom followed.

  Instead of falling, we hovered for a moment, embraced by a cooling breeze. Slowly it lowered us to the street, where a small crowd of people gathered. They backed away from us as we touched down lightly on the cracked and broken sidewalk.

  As soon as we touched the ground, I sent out the call again, feeling a different presence respond to it.

  What is your will, Master? spoke a voice in my mind, like a rushing stream.

  “Go into that dwelling.” I said. “Destroy the fire spirit there and quench the flames.” The invisible astral presence of the water elemental sent a flowing feeling of obedience and moved to obey. We stood and watched for a few minutes as the flames shooting from the windows and the hole in the wall above slowly flickered and died.

  Smoke continued to pour from the blackened ruins of the apartment as my water elemental returned.

  The fire spirit is gone, Master, it said, and the flames are quenched.

  “What about the human inside?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

  He is dead, Master, the spirit replied. His spirit has gone. Its words were without emotion or concern, simply relaying the facts.

  I closed my hand tightly around the sheets of paper in the pocket of my long coat, and Dr. Gordon’s words seemed to echo back to me.

  Protect everyone from the things that are coming. Keep them safe. Then I remembered his other words, when he’d touched my chest.

  “The real enemy is not out there.” Gordon had said. “It’s in here.”

  17

  As the first light of dawn poked through the cracks around the covered windows of the old church, Trouble came over, holding a steaming mug, which she held out to me. “No, thanks.” I said.

  “Talon, you should at least drink something.”

  I shook my head. “I’m fasting. It helps to clear the mind and spirit and I’m going to need it. Have you heard from the others?”

  She nodded, setting the plastic mug down on the nearby windowsill. “They’re making the arrangements.”

  “Good. Boom can handle it, especially with Hammer backing him up.”

  “You’re also going to need to be rested.” Trouble said. “You haven’t slept since yesterday.”

  “Sleep deprivation can help create the right state of consciousness, too.” I said. “I’m going to be in a trance for a while, and it’ll help facilitate..

  “Bulldrek.” she said. “You’re just saying that, Talon. What good is it if you’re exhausted?”

  I looked up from where I crouched. “We don’t have that kind of time. The elemental Garnoff sent after us means he’s playing hardball. Before, Garnoff and his people only tried to capture us—gel rounds, stun weapons.

  This last spirit wasn’t trying to knock anybody out, it meant business. Garnoff is scared, and that means we don’t have a lot of time.

  “Besides.” I said, standing up and brushing off my hands. “Today is Samhain, so it’s the best time to do this. It’s when the paths into the depths of the astral plane are the most open and accessible. If I’m going to do this, there’s no better time.”

  Trouble looked down at my handiwork.

  “Looks pretty elaborate.” she said.

  It was that. The old slate floor at the front of the church was just perfect for the kind of work I had in mind, once I pushed aside the remains of the old carpet. The pockets of my long coat were filled with the various tools I needed to do magic: chalk, bits of string, candle stubs, crystals, and fetishes like strands of my shorn hair woven into a cord.

  I took chalk in several different colors and drew a double circle in red on the floor, three meters wide. Between the bands, I scribed magical runes and symbols of protection and travel. Outside the circle I drew eight red triangles, pointing outward like arrows toward the eight airts, the primal directions of the compass. In the center of each triangle was a different rune or symbol associated with that direction. At the point of each triangle was a small white candle, stuck to the floor with drops of hot wax.

  “It’s not perfect.” I said, “but it’s the best I could do with the space I have to work with in here.”

  “You’ve been working on it all night.”

  “Well, everything has to be just right, or else the circle won’t be able to protect my body while I’m journeying astrally.”

  “I’ll keep an eye on things.” she said, with a hint of reproach in her voice.

  I turned to look at her again. “I know you will. That’s not what I meant. The circle doesn’t offer any physical protection, really. It only creates an astral barrier to protect my body from spirits and magic. If Garnoff sends another magical attack, I want to be ready.”

  “Now that it’s ready, when are you going to go?”

  “Soon.” I said.

  “Look.” Trouble said, toying with the rim of the cup, “I wanted to say I’m sorry about what happened before. I shouldn’t have presumed . . .”

  “It’s okay.” I said. “I just wasn’t expecting it.”

  “I want you to know I’m not in the habit of throwing myself at every guy who comes into my life.”

  “I know, I know. It’s all right. I’m very flattered.”

  “Just not interested.” she concluded.

  “No, but I want you to know it’s not you. I don’t... I’m not good with relationships.”

  “Okay.” she said coolly. “I understand. We keep this strictly business.”

  “I don’t know about that. I consider you a friend. This isn’t business for me. It’s personal.”

  “For me too.” Trouble said. There was a long moment of silence before she spoke again. “Do you really think this plan is going to work?”

  “It’s the best shot we’ve got.” I said.

  Trouble swallowed hard and picked up the mug, her unbound hair hiding her face as she bowed her head to drink. “All right, then, you’d better get to it.” she said. “I’ll make sure everything else is taken care of.”

  I sat in the center of the circle in a lotus position, calming my mind with meditation, preparing myself for what was to come. I thought about what I’d told Trouble, that I wasn’t interested in a relationship. It wasn’t a lie exactly, but it wasn’t the whole truth, either. I wasn’t ready to explain all of it to her. Not until we took care of Garnoff and whatever he was involved in. We all had enough on our minds right now. I pushed those thoughts aside and focused, quietly chanting mantras to calm and center me, body, mind, and spirit. Breathing slowly, calmly, in and out, letting the breath flow, letting the energy flow.

  I opened my senses to an awareness of the astral plane, to the complex play of energies and life force all around me. Although the church was no longer consecrated, it had been the focus of worship and caring for many years, leaving a pleasant warmth lingering in the astral atmosphere of it. I let the gentle touch of it comfort me.

  When I was ready, I opened my eyes. The interior of the ch
urch was dim and silent. The pages I got from Dr. Gordon were spread out on the floor in front of me. I used the diagrams to help construct the hermetic circle, and I would use the imagery to help guide me along the journey to where I needed to go.

  I stood and drew Talonclaw from its sheath, facing north. Holding the dagger in front of me, point upward, I began to activate the circle.

  “Spirits of the North, Powers of Earth, I call you to be present in my circle. Fertile soil, unyielding rock, brilliant sand, and precious crystal, send forth your power, make my circle strong and let it stand against all things that might come to do me harm. Hail and welcome.”

  I lowered my mageblade to point at the northern candle, and a green flame sprang up from the wick, causing the rune in the triangle to shimmer with a faint greenish light. The scent of freshly turned soil and freshly cut grass seemed to fill the circle. I drew up the light with the power of my will and used it to draw a pentagram shimmering in the air on the edge of the circle.

  Then I turned toward the east, where the morning light shone through the gaps covering the windows. The remains of some stained glass turned the light into a cascade of jewel-tones on the floor.

  “Spirits of the East, Powers of Fire, I call you to be present in my circle. Light of knowledge, forge fire, heat of passion, spark of inspiration, send forth your power, make my circle blaze with light to fight back the darkness that may come to do me harm. Hail and welcome.”

  A wave of warmth washed over my face and hands as I lowered my blade, and the eastern candle burned with reddish fire that I drew up to make a pentagram of red flames in the east before turning to the south.

  “Spirits of the South, Powers of Air, I call you to be present in my circle. Gentle breeze, roaring gale, breath of life, wind of reason, send forth your power, make my circle resilient and blow away the mists that obscure the truth. Hail and welcome.” The southern candle flickered with a pure yellow flame that formed a pentacle in the southern quarter as a cooling breeze seemed to blow through the circle.

  Lastly, I turned to the west. “Spirits of the West, Powers of Water, I call you to be present in my circle. Gray twilight, ocean depths, cauldron of transformation, send forth your power, make my circle flow and change to protect me from harm. Let me drink of your depths and find the knowledge I seek.” The western candle held a watery blue fire that I used to put the final pentagram in place as I heard a sound like the roaring of waves against a rocky shore.

  I turned again to the north and held Talonclaw overhead, pointing up to the heavens. The remaining four candles ignited at the cross-quarters, all burning with a warm golden light that seemed to spread out all around me.

  “Earth, Fire, Air, and Water.” I intoned, “bind this circle and keep me from all forces that may come to do me harm. Watch over me as I travel on my journey to find the truth. I create a place between the worlds, a space beyond space and a time beyond time, standing on the border of the Otherworld, where the deepest paths are open on Samhain. I will journey along those secret roads until I find what I seek. So be it.”

  The pentacles of light flared and the circle was enclosed in a dome of opalescent light, mixing the colors of all the candles into one. I sheathed my mageblade and stretched out on the floor, placing my rolled-up jacket beneath my head as a pillow. I looked up into the light of the circle’s protection and began to slip into a trance. My spirit slipped the bonds of my body and I traveled into the depths of the astral plane.

  On the threshold, the twilight border between the metaplanes and the outside world, lives the Dweller on the Threshold. The Dweller takes many forms, and always tries to dissuade travelers from entering the metaplanes. Some believe it is a manifestation of subconscious resistance, the ego or id speaking to you through images in a deep trance, a kind of subconscious defense mechanism. Others believe the Dweller is a powerful spirit, guardian of the gateway into the metaplanes, with its own mysterious reasons for testing those who try to enter the domains beyond. If you ask me, it’s nothing more than a serious pain in the ass.

  As I passed through a long tunnel, I could see a dark figure ahead, silhouetted by a blood-red light coming from beyond.

  “You come because you must.” said the figure of Dr. Gordon. He was surrounded by the reddish glow from the wide tunnel behind him. The light made it impossible to see what lay beyond. Gordon was on my mind, so it was no surprise that the Dweller took on his form.

  “You won't keep your promise.” the image of Gordon said. “After all, what is a promise made in the heat of the moment? You won’t keep it. You’ll turn away, find some reason to go elsewhere, like you always do.”

  “What?” I said.

  “You always leave. When things become too difficult, you find yourself an out and you’re gone.”

  “That’s not true!” The Dweller always tries to rattle your cage, tries to create self-doubt to keep travelers from going any further. In this particular case, it was doing a pretty good job.

  “Of course it is.” the doctor’s image continued. He was considerably more calm and rational than when I saw him last, more like the old Dr. Gordon I knew from the Institute. “I gave you an opportunity to escape the attack of that fire elemental and you took it. You already had what you needed from me. Tell the old man whatever he wants to hear, eh? It doesn’t really matter whether or not you mean it.”

  “I tried to help you...” I started to say.

  “You just can’t think of anyone other than yourself.” said the image of Ryan Mercury, the leader of Assets, Inc. “You have to grab all the glory. You can’t follow the plan because you don’t happen to agree with it.”

  “I did what I had to do. There wasn’t any time to go according to the plan.” I said.

  “So you take it on yourself to make life or death decisions for everyone else? Do you think that makes you worthy of being a part of our team? Are you the kind of person we can trust with our lives?”

  “Dammit, Ryan.” I said. “I nearly died for you and the team, to get the Dragon Heart into place!”

  “Maybe you should have died.” Ryan said, his words like cold razors. “Maybe it should have been you instead of all the other people who died. Maybe you should have died and Lucero should have been the one to get her life back. Do you really think you’re worthy of a second chance at life?”

  “And what have you done with it?” asked Jane-in-the-Box, a virtual vixen clad in tight red leather. “When things get tough and you decide you can’t handle it, what do you do? You run away again. You don’t turn to your friends for help, to people who care about you. You just leave.”

  “I don’t want anyone else involved.” I said. “This is my problem. It doesn’t involve anyone else.”

  “Don’t want anyone else involved?” Trouble asked me. “Who do you think I am? I came to you because this whole mess I’m in is your fault. I’m involved up to my neck, and you treat this like it’s your own personal vendetta, like nobody else matters. I reached out to you, and you won’t even tell me the truth. You’d rather let me think there’s something wrong with me.”

  “I am going to tell you, just not right now. It’s not the right time.” I said weakly.

  “Oh, really? When were you planning on getting to the truth? Waiting to see if I walk away from this run? If you’re lucky, maybe one of us will get killed and save you the trouble of talking to another person at all.”

  “It’s not like that...” I started to say.

  “No?” Boom said, his deep voice echoing strangely. “Isn’t it? How long did we run together, Talon? A few years? After I came back to Boston and took over the nightclub, did you try and get in touch with me? Did our friendship mean anything to you?”

  “Of course it did, but I was involved in so many runs after Dunkelzahn’s assassination, then Assets took me on and . . . there was never any time.”

  “But when you needed something from me, there was plenty of time, eh?”

  “It’s not like that!”
I protested. “I’ve been away from Boston for too long. I didn’t know the shadows here! I couldn’t operate on unfamiliar ground without help.”

  “I thought this didn’t involve anyone else.” Boom said. “I thought it was personal.”

  “It is.” I said.

  “Maybe it’s personal for more people than just you.”

  “I just don’t want anyone else to get hurt.” I said. “Why? Because you’re afraid of how it will hurt you?” said a familiar voice. The deep green eyes and freckled features were just as I remembered them. Damn the Dweller to hell.

  “Jase?” I said in a small voice.

  “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? So no one else is at risk, so you can do what needs to be done alone. Is that it?”

  “Yes.”

  “But you couldn’t have come this far without help.”

  “Yes.”

  “So, doesn’t your friends risking themselves for you make this personal for them, too?” Jase’s image said. “Don’t you care about them?”

  “Of course I do but. . .”

  “But not too much.” he said.

  “I don’t want anyone to get hurt.” I said weakly.

  “Like I did?” Jase said. “Like you did? Life is risk, Talon. Everyone gets hurt sooner or late. Everyone dies.”

  “Gods, Jase, I miss you so much.” The image began to fade from sight until there was nothing except the opening into the metaplanes, glowing dull red, like blood.

  “Go on, Tal.” Jase’s voice said from all around me. “Go and finish what you started.”

  18

  I stepped into the blood red light and it surrounded me. I was drifting alone in a sea of blood. The light was hot around me and I couldn’t see anything but red. Time seemed to slip away and I was floating, drifting. I felt a gentle tug pulling me upward and flowed along with it. It was like swimming through light, which grew brighter and brighter.

  My head broke the surface and I found myself swimming in some kind of sea. The waters were red like blood, and warm. I stepped onto shore and came onto a beach of golden sand, looking up at the wonder before me.