Vicious Ambitions (BWWM Romance) (Wife Secrets Book 1)
Page 4
“Come here baby,” I said as he plopped down next to me on the bed. “Let me hold you.”
“Naw, I gotta get up and get in the shower,” he breathed heavily. “Got that big project today.”
“What big project? There’s always some big project going on. But you can’t make time for your own damn wife, Trent?”
My question fell on deaf ears as he rose from the bed huffing and puffing as if he had just ran the seven meter dash before entering the master bath. The screeching of the shower turning on followed by the gushing of water from the showerhead, let me know he was already inside and further yelling would only prove futile. But he wasn’t getting off as easily as he did a few minutes ago. I hopped from the bed as quick as ever headed for the shower. I pulled the curtain open and stepped inside admiring the way the soap rolled down his strapping carved back and down to his nicely firmed ass cheeks. I yearned for him even though he didn’t feel the same for me. I practically salivated just thinking about him.
“What are you doing, Kelly?”
“I’m trying to get round two started, baby.” I moved his arm to get around to his chest, licking his soapy nipples.
“I told you I couldn’t right now. I’ve gotta get dressed to go.” He gently shoved me away, forcing me to lick air as I struggled to push closer towards him.
“Baby, we used to do it two to three times a day with no problems. You weren’t worried about work then. They don’t need you right now, Trent, I do. They aren’t trying to save our marriage right now, I am.” I pulled him closer to me pressing my tits against his chest. “Don’t you wanna fix this marriage?”
“Look, I don’t have time for this shit right now. I’ve really gotta go, Kelly. You were the one that said business would always be a priority, right?” He maneuvered around me, continuing his lather.
“Oh don’t try to use my words against me, now. You’re just a fucking asshole. A cheating lying asshole.” I slapped his lathery back.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard what I said, Trent. You’re a liar and cheater on top of being an asshole. Yeah don’t think that I don’t know about her.” I exited the shower, soaking wet heading back into the bedroom and straight for the closet, picking an outfit out for work.
I was so distraught that I couldn’t even do it. I couldn’t even fathom the thought of me going into work disheveled and fucked up about this situation anymore. He didn’t even seem to care. He continued on with his shower for another few minutes before entering the room bare naked and dripping, finding me Indian style on the floor in front of our bed.
“Get up off the floor, Kelly. You’re delusional. There is no one else, alright.”
“Don’t pacify my feelings just cause you’re not man enough to own up to the shit. It’s okay I get it. Cowards never tell the truth.”
“Kel, you’re walking on very thin ice here. Now I’m trying to be nice.”
“Nice? You’re trying to be nice? I haven’t felt you be nice for over two months now and all of a sudden you want to be nice.” My hand gestures were erratic. “I…I don’t even know why I’m still here trying to fight for this marriage but I am. I’m here but you’re not. I’m here alone everyday trying to make things right with you and for what? For this?”
I took my phone and quickly whipped out the picture Portia had sent me and heaved it in his face. He couldn’t deny the proof that was put before him now. It was no longer an allegation. Nope, this time I had proof that he was a low down dirty bastard who was giving up on our vows. I continued to shove the evidence in his face until he snatched it out of my hand, concentrating on it as if he couldn’t believe his eyes.
“Yeah, motherfucka. That’s you. You look so happy, so in love with that bitch.” My feet started frantically dancing around the room like I was Tyson getting ready for a big fight.
“Where did you get this?”
“It doesn’t matter where I got it. Just know that you’ve been caught. I see you! I fucking see you.” My breathing became erratic. “And what’s worse is that you’re denying this when you didn’t deny that bitch you had lying in our bed weeks ago.”
“This is some Photoshopped shit somebody done sent you to get you all worked up, Kelly. Don’t believe every little piece of crap that comes to your phone.”
“Are you serious right now? Fool, that’s you Saturday at the Stained Glass Bistro with this tramp. You were all kissy face with the bitch. Yeah, you’ve been caught and you still can’t man up.”
“Slow down, woman. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
The anger built up so heavily in my throat that I was beginning to be out of breath from all the excitement. I stopped and sat down on the bed to calm down even though I didn’t really want to. I wanted to kick his ass from here to New York and back to get it through to his head that I loved him. Yet, I was not about to be a fool for him any longer. He continued to lie to my face even with the evidence before him and I just couldn’t take it anymore. Cheating is one thing but lying when you know you’re caught was the ultimate betrayal.
“I’m giving you one last chance, Trent—“
“Fine. That’s me, alright,” he was snarling like a pit bull waiting to attack. “That’s me and I fuck her, along with a few other bitches. But none of them have pussy sweeter than hers so I see her more often. I fuck them but I love you. I make love to you but I fuck other bitches when my dick gets the itch. You happy now?”
“You worthless son of a bitch. You keep fucking those hoes and your dick is going to have more than one itch and it just might be one you can’t get rid off.”
“Well, you wanted to know so badly, so now you do. And, since you know, there will be no more sneaking around or the so-called “lying” that you hate so much. I’m just going to politely say that I’m going out with such and such and you will be here when I get back. Deal? You ain’t going nowhere, so all of this charade was pointless of you to do.”
“I’ll leave your ass, Trent. I’ll fucking leave—“
“And go where? Do what? Go back to your mother’s? You can’t stand that bitch as much as I can’t, so if you want to do that then be my guest. But we both know you won’t leave this dick for shit in the world. So why are we playing this little game, Kel?”
Apart of me felt like he was right. I hated living like a parasite off of other people. I barely liked to talk to my girls about my problems. Most of the time they gave bad advice since it was coming from an already torn spot in their hearts. Their relationships were all fucked up. So, how could I seek help from someone who was just as broken as I was? I was the only child since my brother was murdered twelve years ago. Trent was basically all I had.
“Fuck you, Trent. You have no right to treat me like that. You have no right to think you own me and can do what you want with me. We’re supposed to be a team. I thought we were a team.”
“We are a team, but I’m the motherfucking quarterback. You’re either going to run the same plays I’m running or get left on the sideline, benching it the whole season. Now what are you going to do?” The smug smirk on his face told me that he thought he had won.
I may have lost the battle but I was not going to lose this war. He had forgotten that I wasn’t the type of female to take defeat lying down so easily. I had one more trick up my sleeve to get my husband right back where he should be, up under me. If it didn’t work, I would gladly cut my losses and all ties to him. I just hated giving up without saying that I had at least tried. My heart burned inside for him. We had been together so long that it was hard to comprehend life without him. Tears streamed from my eyes as I thought about it. He walked off disappearing inside of his closet for a few minutes before walking back out dressed in a casual shirt and jeans. He never went to the office looking like that.
“Where are you going?” I asked reluctantly, already fearing the answer.
“I’m going out with one of my girls. You’re welcomed to come with if you want.” He stuffed hi
s wallet and phone into his jeans pockets. “No since in you sitting here since you know what I’m doing.”
“Why are you doing this? I have been nothing but a good woman to you. Just give me an answer as to why.”
“Because I can. That’s why. Because I feel like we rushed into this marriage and I want some damn freedom. Is that too much to ask?” He stood, hovering over my naked body.
“Well, maybe I should find someone to play with too,” I murmured, immediately feeling the weight of his body on top of me and his hands gripping the girth of my neck.
“I’d better not ever catch you fucking with somebody else, again. You got that?” He growled into my face as I trembled in pure unadulterated fear, squeezing tighter. “That shit you pulled the other night, fucking my buddies, is never going to happen again, either. Where the fuck do you get off giving my pussy away? Huh?”
“Why the fuck do you care? You’re giving my dick away.”
“Don’t test me, Kelly. I will fucking kill you. Do you understand me? I’ll end your fucking life.” He hopped up off of me, sending me flying onto the bed and walked towards the door, turning back to stare at me as I balled into the fetal position bursting into tears. “You can think what you want about me, Kel. But the truth is I really do love you girl. You wouldn’t still be here if I didn’t love you. But you brought this shit on yourself when I caught you with dude at the bar that night. You have no one to blame but yourself.”
The words he spat didn’t really mean shit to me. They did, but I was in too much shock to focus on the ones that were supposed to be warming my heart right then. I just couldn’t believe he had put his hands on me. Was I supposed to equate that with his love for me? My world was becoming more confusing by the day. I had no idea if I should stay or go, if I should call the cops or forgive him. I jumped up from the bed before he could walk out the door.
“Don’t you ever touch me like that again,” I barked feeling as though I should’ve slapped the dog shit out of him instead.
Chapter 6
Tuesday Morning
I couldn’t bring myself to leave the house yesterday, not after everything that happened that morning. Crawling in bed and staying under the covers all day without eating or drinking seemed like my best bet. But today, I was on a mission. Today would be the day that I took my life back from my husband and for myself. This man had me fucked up if he thought I was about to turn into one of those women whose husbands beat them and turn their self-esteems into mush. I couldn’t see that shit happening to me. I was dressed in one of my favorite gray business skirt suits and it was tighter than a virgin’s pussy. Nothing could stop my flow. I was a woman scorned ready to pull my life back together.
Carefully walking out the door to my truck, I hopped in and pulled off with the quickness. It was early, like 5:15am early and Trent was still asleep in bed. If it weren’t for the fact that I loved him so much, I would’ve burned him alive with a pot of hot grits a long damn time ago. Instead, I decided I wasn’t ready to give up on my man or this marriage just yet. In hindsight, he did come home to me every night no matter how late that was and as far as I could tell, I was the only one he was fucking raw.
I needed to clear my head for the day ahead. I couldn’t do that lying in bed next to a man that I was frustrated with. It didn’t matter to him that I had put a blanket and his pillow outside the bedroom door for him last night to go sleep on the couch. He didn’t take the hint or get the memo, since he picked the shit up and came right in the bedroom stretching out next to me in the damn bed. He thought I was asleep when he weaseled his way back in the bed, but I wasn’t. When I tried to get out of bed with my pillow and blanket to go sleep on the couch myself, he grabbed me by my white cotton panties and pulled me back in the bed asking where I was going. Then he wrapped his long arm around me as if to lock me in for the night. For the life of me, I couldn’t understand his logic one bit. He obviously wanted to be able to have his cake and eat it to and I was just supposed to sit back and accept that.
At the university it was like a desert, quiet and still. I went back to my office and lay back on the thinking couch enjoying the peace and serenity that surrounded me. It gave me the time and space to think about the confusion going on in my head. It didn’t clear much of it up but as I tried to drift back off to sleep, the queasiness returned in full force beckoning my attention. I jolted up from the couch and headed to the break room to quickly make some coffee that would ease the tension going on inside. Everyday was a struggle, but I was determined to fight the depression within.
The coffee and a bagel that I popped in the break room microwave hit the spot. I was equipped with enough strength to focus on something else other than my health. The time was moving as fast as the sun as it shone brightly through all of the available open windows. Colleagues began filing in one by one, all but the one I was looking for. The one day I’m here way before time and she was now the one running late. I went back into my office to fiddle around with some papers hoping time would escape me in doing so. It did. It had just turned 7:45am, when I heard the phone lines click and open up. It meant she was sitting at the front desk. Eagerly, I waltzed up to the front desk as she was sipping her Starbucks coffee and preparing for the day.
“Um, hi Tara. May I speak with you in my office for a moment please? Thank you.” I didn’t even wait for her to respond before I walked off headed straight back to my office.
“Yes, Mrs. Jamison.” She entered the room with her fingers interlocked.
“Please close the door, Tara and come have a seat.” I waited until she had done as I instructed before speaking again, keeping my eye on her the entire time. “So, how are you doing this morning?”
“I’m fine, Mrs. Jamison. May I ask what this is about?”
“Well, I kind of need your advice,” I began raising from my seat and walking around the desk taking a seat on the front end. “I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking what does a licensed trained psychologist need with the simple minded advice of a common secretary.”
“Excuse me?”
“But the truth is,” I continued, ignoring her attempt to act offended. “I need to talk to someone who won’t necessarily dissect my mind as another professional would. I want to speak to someone who might be able to relate to me better than some old coon who has been doing this job for decades.”
“Um, okay, I guess I could try my best to give you my best opinion. What’s up?” Tara tugged at her pencil skirt a bit before straightening her yellow tank blouse.
“Tara, let me ask you, do you have a man?”
“Uh, yes.”
“Good. So if you found out that your man was fucking some other little bitch and she was someone near and dear to you, what would you do?” I asked crossing my arms, intrigued by the response that she was about to release.
“Well, I—“
“Because if it were me, I don’t really know what I would do. I mean the ghetto bitch inside of me would tell me to snatch her ass right where she stood and drag his ass through the mud in divorce court.” I slowed my breathing, feeling myself becoming overexcited. “But is that just me? Am I wrong for feeling that way?”
“Well I don’t think you would be wrong. But you have to understand that you can’t just walk up on anybody with that mess though. Some people don’t come from the same side of the track as you. Some people come from a rougher side of the track and may play dirtier games. So I would suggest that if you did do something of that nature, that you not bring a knife to gun fight.” She licked her lips. “But that’s just me. You feel me?”
“Oh see, that bitch doesn’t know me like she thinks she does. She doesn’t know where I come from.”
“Hmm, you never know what other people know…Mrs. Jamison.”
The room filled with an eerie silence as we hawked each other down. Tara had a look in her eye like she was tired of sitting there. I didn’t give a shit about her mundane ass. She was fucking with the right one if
she wanted to leap. She knew not whom she was dealing with. Whether she knew it or not, I could make or break her tiny little career. I could make it so that she never worked another high level paying job in this city again. In its place, I smiled.
“So, it’s safe to say that you wouldn’t accept that kind of behavior from your cheating man or his skinny whore.” I kept the smile perched upon my face.
“Yes, I guess you could say that.” She batted her eyes my way. “But you know, if it were me, I would just be looking at what I had right in front of me rather than the bullshit I was going home to.”
“What’s the bullshit?”
“Oh, you know, loneliness, crying, heartache. All of that shit that I didn’t need, I wouldn’t be focused on that.” Tara rose from her seat slowly moving towards me.
"Well, some women aren't as nonchalant about those kinds of things as you are. Some of us aren't willing to give up so easily on what we've got going on at home. It's called not being a quitter," I replied as she moved even closer, invading my space.
"If I might be so bold, Mrs. Jamison, if you were my woman I would never leave you at home crying to yourself." Tara placed her hand on my inner thigh rubbing my skin smoothly.
"The fuck are you doing?" I batted her hand away forcefully. "Don't touch me like that, ever."
"Awe, don't be afraid of me. I won't bite unless you want me too.” The hungry expression on her face spoke differently.
“Tara, you are crossing the line between employer and employee. This is something that should never be traversed in the workplace. Now, I think you ought to back the hell up before I have you escorted up out of here.”
“Call ‘em. It won’t change the fact that I’ve been thinking about licking your sweet little pussy from the moment you hired me. All I can think about at my desk is making that brown kitty purr so hard it bursts.” Tara leaned on the desk, sticking her hand up my skirt.