Snotty Saves the Day

by Tod Davies

  Snotty ranted on like this for a good while. When he showed no sign of stopping, the giant Bear looked around to make sure there was nothing sharp on the floor. With a heavy tread she stood. And then with an enormous paw she felled Snotty one more time.

  This time, though, Snotty woke much faster, so it must have been a lighter blow than the first. The silly-looking Bear was back, standing next to Big Teddy. Both looked down at him in a worried way.

  “All right now?” Big Teddy said. But Snotty was too confused to reply. He stood up, then sat down and tried to get his bearings. Big Teddy and the silly-looking Bear looked at him with silent sympathy.

  “Sorry about that,” Big Teddy said. “But with the Fever it’s the only way.”

  “I understand,” Snotty said. And to his surprise, he did. He was sick and that was the cure. It was perfectly clear. And that wasn’t all. To his surprise, he understood many things now that he hadn’t before.

  It was like he had put on a pair of glasses and could see the world more plainly than before.

  For example, he saw right away that the silly-looking Bear had a name. “I must’ve heard it, but I wasn’t listening,” he thought. “Of course. His name is Tuxton—Tuxton Ted. And those other Bears: the Orange Bear, the Rose Pink Bear, the Robin’s Egg Blue Bear, the Lime Green Bear, and the Crimson Bear. They’re called Tia, Fia, Fion, Mion, and Lui. The Lemon Yellow Bear’s name, of course, is Melia. How could I have missed that before?”

  Snotty wondered at this—at all of it. He looked at the bowl on the table and at the Key shining from its bottom. With a look of mistrust he said, “What IS that?”

  Big Teddy and Tuxton Ted exchanged a look. “That’s the Key,” Big Teddy said. She paused as she considered how best to explain. “It’s connected to all the other Keys, on each and every world.” At Snotty’s confused look, she tried again. “It’s our connection to what Is.”

  “The height of Bear Technology,” Tuxton Ted squeaked in his silly-sounding voice. “It took us hundreds of years to develop.”

  “I don’t... I don’t understand,” Snotty said.

  Big Teddy looked around the tent, as if for some kind of example. One massive paw massaged her jaw. Then she took up a large blank piece of paper.

  On this paper she wrote the words: “TEDDY BEAR.”

  “Tuxton,” she said quietly. “Please stand over there.” Tuxton stood where Big Teddy pointed, across the table from Snotty.

  Big Teddy pointed at the words. “This is what Tuxton is. Do you understand that?”

  Snotty nodded. “Of course I do!” he said, vaguely irritated.

  The Bear gave him a worried look. Then she wrote on the paper, “TUXTON TED.” And she said, “This is Tuxton’s name.”

  Snotty nodded again. He was getting annoyed. “They’re treating me like a kid,” he thought.

  But Big Teddy wasn’t finished. Now she drew a sketch on the paper, and this was a picture of Tuxton—a very good likeness, in fact.

  “This is a picture of Tuxton,” she said.

  “Yes, I KNOW,” Snotty said. But then, without warning, something in him shifted. He sat up, more alert now. “Okay,” he said, intent. “I think I see.”

  Big Teddy, watching him, saw the shift. “Good,” she said, nodding. “Now. Let me ask you a question. Think it over before you answer. “These things—” She pointed at the words and at the picture. “Are they Tuxton himself?”

  “Of course not!” Snotty said. He moved uneasily in his seat. He sensed something important. But he didn’t know what.

  “Of course not,” Big Teddy agreed. “Good, good. These things SAY Tuxton. But they’re not Tuxton.”

  “No,” Snotty agreed in turn. He felt excited.

  “These things mean Tuxton, but they are not Tuxton. You can’t store the meaning of Tuxton in this word”—here Big Teddy pointed at the word ‘BEAR’—“or in this picture.” She pointed to the portrait she had drawn. “We puzzled over this problem for many hundreds of years.”

  “Puzzled over what?” Snotty said. He was puzzled himself.

  Big Teddy looked at Tuxton and rubbed her flat button eyes with her paws. Then she had an inspiration. She put her paw into the water of the bowl and pulled out the Key. She held this out to Snotty.

  “Go on,” she said in a gentle voice. “Don’t grab it. Just touch one end. Now that it’s out of the water the current won’t be as strong.”

  Snotty looked doubtful. After what had happened, he was a little scared of the Key.

  “Touch the Key and think of Tuxton,” Big Teddy said. “And think: what does ‘Tuxton’ mean?”

  Snotty hesitated. Then he reached out with two fingers and touched the Key. As he did, Tuxton told him his story:

  “I am a very anxious bear [Tuxton said], and I have been that way my whole life. This is unusual for us Teddies; normally we’re more easygoing than that. But I was born frightened, and that fear has never left me to this day.

  “I don’t remember much about being born. My first memory is of being shut in a dark box. I shouted and shouted and shouted, and pounded at the lid, but no one came. My first memories are terrifying ones. I hate to think about them, really. But it’s always better to remember where you come from, because if you forget, you forget who you are, don’t you? And if you forget who you are, what can you remember?47

  “My next memory is of a blinding light. The lid of the box moved away, and I was in a bright white room. Later I learned this was a hospital, and I was brought there to do a job. My job was one I was well suited for, one in the medical profession. I was meant to comfort the small children in the wards, coax them to take their medicine, and keep them quiet at night.

  “Of all the stuffed animals and dolls in that hospital I was the best at my job. That’s something I’m proud of, but I can’t take the credit for it. No, I was good at my job because I was so anxious. And because I was so frightened. Because of these things, I knew exactly how the children on my ward felt. I was able to comfort them in the way they wanted to be comforted, because it was the way I wanted to be comforted, too.

  “It wasn’t enough, though. I worked at it, but I always knew there was some terror still there that wouldn’t go away no matter how hard I tried.

  “One day a rumor came through the hospital. We were going to close! All of us, Bears, Dolls, Clowns, plastic Horses, none of us could believe it would happen. We worked harder than ever to prove the worth of the place. But it was no use. One day I lay still, comforting a child whose tonsils would have been better left where they were, and who’d been given orange juice by mistake after they’d been taken out. His throat hurt him, and he cried. He laughed when he saw my silly face, and he was quiet when I lay under his arm. The nurse said to him, ‘Do you want to take that Bear home? We’ll be closing soon, and if you don’t he’ll just get thrown away.’

  “But the boy’s mother hissed, ‘Who knows what germs that thing’s carrying?’ And then she said to the boy, ‘I’ll buy you the biggest toy in the hospital shop if you give up that Bear.’

  “He wouldn’t, though. He held me tight. But he had to sleep, and then they took me away. They put me, with all the other toys on my ward, in an even bigger box, and then they threw us all far away.

  “Somehow, though, I could still hear that boy cry. He was crying for me, thinking it was his fault I was thrown away. I know he never forgot me, I know that for certain, for I’ve felt him since, with the Key. He is older now, with children of his own, but during the night he thinks of me, and all this time later, he still misses me. Of all the children I ever worked with, he is the child I think of most. He is why I’m here.

  “I was terrified in that box, Snotty. But I remembered that little boy, and I thought if ever I got free of it I would try to find him again.

  “A long time passed. Then the box we toys were in split open, on a smelly hillside, one day in the rain. I set out to find that little boy again. But I never did.”

  (Here Tuxton
smiled his silly smile.)

  “You look like that boy, Snotty, did you know that? I thought so the minute I saw you. And that makes me happy, somehow, and a little less frightened than before.”

  As Tuxton spoke, Snotty felt his story. He could feel Tuxton: where he came from, what it was like to be him. He could feel Tuxton’s valor, his softness, his kindness, and his anxiety. He felt Tuxton himself. He understood that what was stored there in the Key WAS Tuxton. He understood that, if he practiced enough and was strong enough to stand it, he could understand the meaning of Tuxton. And that once he understood this meaning, he would never be able to look at the Bear in the same way again.

  Snotty sat there. He frowned.

  “I came to ask you a question,” he said at last. Big Teddy nodded as if she’d known that all along.

  Snotty held out his maimed right hand.48 Even though it was starting to heal, his little finger’s stump throbbed with pain. Tuxton and Big Teddy looked at it gravely. Snotty told them about the Bazaar and Aladdin’s Cave, but they seemed to know the whole story already.

  “Why did I do that?” he asked, troubled. “Why did I sell my little finger for a pile of trash?”

  Big Teddy took up her pen one more time. On the paper she wrote the words, “Snotty’s finger.” Then she drew a picture of the missing finger. She pointed to the word, then to the picture. “You mistook your finger,” she said, “for this... or for this.”

  “It’s the Fever, Snotty,” Tuxton squeaked. “The Fever makes it impossible to see what Is. You couldn’t see that Trash was Trash because of it. You were ill.”

  “Aladdin told you it was treasure. You mistook the word for the thing.”

  “You mistook a word—‘finger’—for your real finger,” Tuxton explained. “As long as you didn’t know what your finger was, it was a fair deal. A word traded for a word—that’s a reasonable trade!”

  “A thing traded for a thing,” Snotty corrected him.

  “But your finger isn’t a thing,” Big Teddy said. “Your finger is alive.”49

  At this Snotty was quiet.

  Without knowing he did it, Snotty picked up the pen. On the paper he wrote the word ‘Snowflake.’ Next to the word he drew an awkward sketch of the little horse. As Big Teddy and Tuxton watched, he pointed first to the word, then to the sketch, then into the air. His lips moved. But he said nothing.

  “I don’t understand,” he said after awhile. The two Bears looked at him in silence.

  Tuxton dug a paw into his plush pocket. “I brought you this,” he said in his silly voice. And he held out a rose gold Key.

  “My KEY!” Snotty said as he took it back. “Where did you find it?”

  “Under the trees,” Tuxton said. “I thought you’d want it.”

  Outside there was a sound. BOOM. BOOM. BOOM. Somewhere a siren began to wail. Snotty could hear Tia, Fia, Fion, Mion, and Lui shouting in the meadow outside. Melia appeared, breathless, in the door to the tent.

  “They’ve found the Path,” she said tersely. Big Teddy nodded, and Melia disappeared.

  “What is it?” Snotty said. “What’s that sound?”

  “They’re coming,” Tuxton Ted said.

  BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.

  “No,” Big Teddy said, and her voice was no longer gentle. “They’re here.”

  “Yes,” Tuxton said, as the rumbling grew louder. And Snotty saw he trembled. But the silly Bear steeled himself and went outside

  The rumbling came closer. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Snotty was scared.

  “Big Teddy,” Snotty said urgently. “What do I do? Tell me what to do!”

  But when he turned, Big Teddy was gone.

  Chapter XIV

  WAR

  Outside, it was chaos.

  Drums sounded with their dull thump from the Plains below. “Thurr-rrrump. Thurrr-rrrrump.” That sound made the hair on the back of Snotty’s neck stand on end.

  And there was that rumbling, even closer than before: BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

  “What’s happening?” Snotty shouted, running here and there. “What is it? What do I do now?” Melia, as she ran past with Tia, Fia, Fion, Mion, and Lui, said over her shoulder, “See you after the battle, Snotty.” Her mouth trembled as she smiled.

  “It’s my turn to tell the next story, Snotty!” Lui called, and she blew him a kiss from her crimson paw. But Snotty saw her paw shake, and saw her steady it as she disappeared with the others down the rocky Path he had flown up with his Idea.

  “Wait!” Snotty called after them. “Wait for me!” He ran after the Bears, but brought his foot down on the edge of a flat rock that skidded out from under him. His foot went one way, his ankle another, and a sharp pain made his teeth clench as he went over and down.

  Nevertheless he hobbled on.

  At the top of the Path the Dog stood, conferring with three figures. And Snotty saw these figures were the Monsters that he had refused to pardon in his glorious days as the Sun God.

  “Is it you?” Snotty said. The Monsters looked completely different to him now. The Monstrous Woman was a large, startled Doll. The Tusked Boar was a worried Piglet with a runny nose. And the Polar Bear was a white fluffy Teddy with a pink ribbon around his neck. He gave Snotty an anxious smile.

  “Yes,” the white Teddy said. “It’s us.”50

  Snotty saw that the group circled something that bounced heavily on the ground. Coming closer, he saw it was an Idea. Only this Idea was more garishly colored than the others.

  “What is it?” he said.

  “It’s a False Idea,” the Doll said with a tight smile.

  “How did it get here without an audience?” the Piglet squeaked. “A False Idea can’t travel far on its own.”

  There was a moment of silence while everyone thought about what that meant. The Dog’s expression said, “No. It hasn’t come here on its own. And there are more to follow.”

  A black shadow covered them. Looking up, Snotty saw a Dragon flying overhead.

  “Is that...?” he said. Then he stopped, ashamed. The Dog nodded grimly. Yes, it was the Dragon Snotty had pardoned. It had joined the Gnomes as their advance guard.

  “It’s not your fault,” the Piglet squeaked consolingly. “You couldn’t have known.”

  “Everything looks different when you have the Fever,” said the fluffy white Bear.

  They all looked at Snotty with sympathy as he hung his head. The fluffy Bear patted him on the arm.

  “The Dragon never could have joined us anyway,” the Doll said. “Dragons hate to look small. They can’t live without thinking they’re Big and Strong.”

  “But the Dragon IS Big and Strong,” Snotty said, astonished. The others looked back at him, just as surprised.

  “Nobody’s as Big and Strong as they look,” the Doll said matter of factly. “I thought everyone knew that. ”51

  “But... but...,” Snotty stammered, not knowing what to say. To cover his confusion, he kicked at the False Idea as it spun and sputtered on the ground. “What do we do with THAT?” he said.

  The Doll pulled him back. “Don’t touch it,” she said. “If it doesn’t get attention, it’ll die on its own.”

  The Dog agreed with this and turned to lead them all away.

  BOOM. BOOM. BOOM. The dull noise filled the air. But Snotty couldn’t see where it came from.

  He hurried after the others, but the pain in his ankle made it hard for him to keep up. “Wait!” he said, and the Piglet, who was just in front of him, turned around. “What Idea was that, anyway?”

  “That?” the Piglet said in its worried way. “That Idea is called Only the Strong Survive.”52

  “Oh,” Snotty said. The pain in his ankle got worse. He had to stop.

  BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.

  The sky turned red now, filling the air with an eerie light. Smoke from the Plains rose up and blotted out the sky. The creatures broke into a run, following the Teddy Bears heading in a grim stream down the mountain. Snotty sprinted to keep up, but came down a
gain on his hurt ankle. He fell with a little cry. He pulled himself up painfully, but it was no use. For now he couldn’t go on.

  As he watched, helpless, the Teddy Bear Brigade marched down the Mountain to War. A trio of stiff Brown Bears with matching tartan bows around their necks ran by, holding rifles at a diagonal against their plush brown chests. The Dog, leading a platoon of brightly colored Kites, disappeared down the mountain’s side. Melia marched behind the Girl Bear Cadre, shouting orders to Tia, Fia, Fion, Mion, and Lui as they went. And Tuxton, silly-looking as ever, but with a grim, determined expression on his silly face, brought up the rear.

  “Tuxton!” Snotty called. But in the hubbub, the Bear couldn’t hear. “Tuxton! Wait!”

  Snotty tried to run after his friend, limping past the marching groups as they formed and followed the others to the battlefield. Beads of perspiration appeared on his forehead and dripped down his face. He put up his hand to wipe these away. A fierce wind began to blow.

  Snotty lost sight of Tuxton in the crowd that streamed out of the Teddy Bear Camp. Then, just when he had given up hope, he spotted the Bear standing alone at the edge of the meadow. Tuxton’s head was bent. He murmured a few words to himself. Snotty struggled to get to him, but the Bear was too far away. And there was something more. Something pulled at Snotty’s ankle. Something that hurt.

  Looking down, Snotty saw it was the False Idea. It was caught on the edge of his purple plush boots. It was the Idea that slowed him down.

  Frustrated, Snotty tried to shake it off, but it clung to his bad ankle, and the movement only caused more pain. He jammed his hands in his pockets and gritted his teeth as the pain washed over him.

  To his surprise, he now heard Tuxton speak—as clear as if the Bear had spoken right in his ear.

  Snotty had forgotten the Key. But he touched it now with his damp hands. And he could feel again what Tuxton was and what Tuxton felt.