I try to suck it up and I grab some toilet paper and blow my nose. I flush the paper and try to speak again. “Mom, it’s really over. He knows about the baby and he spent the night with me and gave my ring back to me. But he was gone this morning and so was my ring. He bugged out on me again.”
“Oh, baby! I’m so sorry, sweetie.”
“I just want to come home and I can’t yet cause of stupid Thanksgiving travelers.”
“So, where are you?” she asks.
“In the bathroom at LAX.”
“Is it nice there?” she asks.
“In the bathroom?” I ask, confused. “I guess it’s pretty nice as far as bathrooms go.”
“No, in L.A. Is it nice in L.A. silly?” she laughs.
“I haven’t really noticed. We came in after dark and I couldn’t see much on the cab ride to the airport on account of I was crying the majority of the time.” I sniffle and grab some toilet paper and wipe my eyes.
Somehow just having Mom on the phone is making me feel a little bit better. At least the tears have stopped and I’m getting the sobbing under control.
“Okay, now tell me why Kip would come and find you just to dump you again.”
“I don’t know!” And the tears are back.
Crap!
“Okay, stop crying. It’s all going to be okay, Peyton. Sweetie, you’ll be home soon and I’ll hug you and make you some hot chocolate and everything will be fine, you’ll see,” her sweet voice tells me, but I’m having a hard time believing her.
“Fine? I don’t think I’ll ever be fine again, Mom. Why does this have to hurt so much?”
My phone makes a little sound and I know I have a text but I can’t look at it or I’ll go into a new round of tears and I don’t know how many I could possibly have left.
“Peyton, look, wipe your eyes and blow your nose then wash your face and go out and find you something to eat and drink. I bet you haven’t eaten at all if you’re this upset and that’s not good for you or the baby.”
“I tried to eat, but I can’t. All I want to do is curl up on the sofa next to you. I need my mommy!” And here I go again.
“Stop that crying, girl! Come on, it’s just a man for Heaven’s sakes. You can get through this.”
“What if Dad left you? Wouldn’t you cry?” I ask through bouts of sobs.
“Don’t even talk like that, Peyton! Now, listen here, young lady. You dry those tears up and do what I told you too. You’re a mother yourself now and we moms have to keep our shit together. Crying is not a thing that we mothers do. Now you have to pull it together and get yourself and that baby something to eat. Do you hear me?”
I sniffle and blow my nose some more. She’s right. I have to pull myself together. This is a minor setback. I already had my plan for this baby and it was only changed for a matter of hours. It’s just back to the original plan now. That’s all.
So what if I love Kip with every fiber of my being. So what if life looks bleak without him in it. So what if I feel more empty than I ever have in my entire life? Whoa, okay, going back off the deep in, let me reign it back in.
I take in a deep breath and let it all out. “I’m going to be okay, Mom. Whew! Thanks for setting me straight. I about lost it for a minute, or a few hours, whatever.”
“Now, you should give me that man’s number so I can give it to your brothers and they can give him a lot of shit for you. Doesn’t that sound nice, baby?” My mother’s angelic voice asks me.
“It does. But in all honesty, I just want no more to do with him. I can’t take thinking about him. It’s too hard. I need to put him way out of my mind, forever. I’m doing better now, Mom. Thanks.”
“Good, sweetie. Now do what I said and get yourself something to eat and we’ll see you later on tonight. I love you, baby girl.”
“I love you too, Mom. I’m turning my phone back off again so don’t freak if you call and I don’t answer. Just while I’ve been on the phone with you I can hear Kip has texted three times and tried to call twice. I don’t know what his angle is, but I don’t wish to discuss a thing with the man right now.”
“Maybe you should though. You are in the same town as he is right now. Maybe you two should decide if he’s going to take part in this child’s life or not.”
“I can’t right now. I just can’t handle it. I’ll get myself straight then try to talk to him about it, but right now I can’t do it,” I say as I leave my bathroom stall to find a bathroom full of women who openly stare at me as I look in the mirror at the black streaks that are running down my cheeks. “Oh, Lord, I’m a mess Mom, gotta go. See you tonight.”
The girl washing her hands at the sink next to me asks, “You okay?”
I shake my head. “Not one tiny bit. But I guess I’ll get okay.”
She turns around and crosses her arms over her chest and smiles. “Does it have anything to do with that baby bump you’re sporting?”
“In a way it does, but not entirely. Its daddy doesn’t want us anymore. A typical story, but it’s a first for me,” I say as I take a make-up wipe out of my purse. “The damn man gave me hope then ran out on me again. I’ll survive.”
“What a dick!” she says. “Where are you headed?”
“Back to Texas. And you?” I ask as I run the wipe over my tear soaked cheeks that burn.
“Texas too. Austin to be exact.”
My eyebrows raise and I smile. “That’s where I’m headed too. Are you on the next flight out?”
She nods. “Yep, off to visit my grandparents for the rest of this week.”
“Are you traveling alone, or with a group?” I ask, trying to decide how I’m going to ask her to trade flights with me.
“Alone. Everyone else is already there.” She pulls a lipstick from her purse and puts it on.
“My flight doesn’t leave until eight tonight. That’s like seven hours or so from now.” I look over at her to see if she has any sympathy for me.
Her eyes twitch a little. “That’s a long time to be sitting here.”
“It is. I thought I’d be able to trade my flight easily, but the damn holiday is messing up my plan to get the hell out of L.A. quickly.”
She turns and looks at me. “Mine is leaving in an hour. How about I trade you?”
“Really?” I ask and nearly pull her into a hug. “That would be so nice of you. And you’ll be happy to trade with me, my ticket is a first class one.”
“Looks like I got my reward for helping out a fellow Texan right off the bat. Come on, let’s go get this ticket thing straightened out and get you on the way back home and away from the idiot of a man who knocked you up,” she says as she takes me by the arm and leads me out.
Finally, a little help!
Kip
Just my luck, we hit no traffic, and it seems Peyton had turned her phone back on for a few minutes then it went right back off again. I can’t believe she isn’t even reading any of my texts.
The bus has its blinker on and it seems the little group of new authors is about to go eat Chinese food. Finally, I’ll have my chance to get a hold of the stubborn woman. That’s all I need is to be able to touch her and she’ll come back around.
I have no idea what’s sent her off like this, but I’ll get to the bottom of it. Pulling in right behind the tour bus, I wait for her to get out. She may just keep her ass on the bus if she realizes I’m here.
One at a time I see the people leave the bus and then the driver and that’s it. No Peyton.
I jump out of the car. “Hey, can any of you tell me where Peyton is?”
A woman turns back and looks at me. “And you are?”
I jog up to her. “I’m her fiancé.”
Her eyebrows go up. “Didn’t realize she had one of those. She actually told me she was single. So who are you now?”
I grin. Another person trying to protect her. Does the girl have no end to her guardians? “We got back together last night. But something’s happened to her. I left this morning to go get so
me things set up and let her sleep. Things have gone awry since then. So if you know where she is, I really need to talk to her and see what has her being so crazy.”
The woman narrows her eyes at me as if trying to figure out if she should tell me anything about Peyton or not. “She was feeling sick and has gone home.”
“Sick? Home?” I ask feeling quite confused.
“Home, yes and sick. Okay, so there you go,” she says then turns to leave and calls back over her shoulder. “So if you do know her then you know where home is for her.”
I thought it was with me, but I guess I was wrong. With a quick turn I go back to my car and off to the airport. She must be flying home.
I hope I haven’t missed her!
Peyton
“Wow! So that’s Kip Dixon’s kid you have there?” the young woman who traded tickets with me asks. Her name’s Rachelle Stone, and I found out she’s originally from Round Rock, just outside of Austin and not too far from where I live.
“Yep,” I answer as we sit in the waiting area. Only thirty more minutes then I’ll be out of here.
“You know you’ll be rich when he has to start paying child support.” She takes a bite of her sandwich. She brought some with her and gave me one. She’s going to college at UCLA to be a chef and rarely eats anyone else’s cooking so she takes her own food everywhere.
“Nah, I don’t want his money. I want him. If he doesn’t want us then I’ll just let him go,” I say and feel my heart filling up with heavy sorrow and hope I don’t go to crying again.
“Don’t short change the kid because of some misplaced pride, Peyton. I was a kid who grew up with no father. My mother was young when she had me and it was her parents who really raised me. Times were tough, and I even had to be placed in a children’s home once.” She stops and looks away, I suppose remembering the bad times.
“I’m, sorry, Rachelle. Don’t go back in your mind to a hard time for my sake. And don’t worry about this kid. It’ll never be sent away. If something was to happen to me, I have a slew of brothers who would make sure the kid was taken care of.”
She nods. “That’s good. My mother was an only child and so am I. My grandparents are all I have left. Mom has her own life. I don’t even know where she is right now.”
Her head drops and her dark, straight hair falls down around her face. Deep blue eyes, fringed with long dark lashes look sad. It makes me feel bad that my situation has stirred up bad memories.
“You know we should exchange numbers. We can visit each other when you go to your grandparents to visit. And if I have to bring the baby to visit its father then maybe I could hang out with you while he does that. I’m sure he won’t want me around anyway, not that I could stand that.” I pat her shoulder and she smiles.
“I’d like that, Peyton.”
I take my phone out and turn it back on so we can get each other’s numbers. A quick glance shows me that he’s stopped trying to get in touch with me. I should’ve known he’d stop. But I assume my heart had no idea as it feels like it’s been stabbed a few dozen times.
“Maybe after I have the baby, we could go out clubbing or something like that,” I say as I open my contacts.
“Not for another year. I’m only twenty,” she says and shows me her number. I type it in and send her a text.
“Do you like to ride horses? I have a few,” I say and put my phone back in my purse. I left it on as it seems Kip’s over trying to contact me.
“I haven’t in years, but I do like to. That sounds fun.”
“Now boarding seats one through fifteen,” the stewardess calls out.
“That’s you,” Rachelle says. “I guess I’ll see you around, Peyton. Maybe we can get together this weekend before I come back here on Monday.”
“Yeah, I’ll give you a call or you can call me. Thanks again for the earlier flight and the sandwich. You saved me.”
I get up and she does too and surprises me with a hug. “It’s all going to be okay, Peyton. And just think about keeping the father in this kid’s life, whether you and he have anything or not. Every kid needs both their parents if at all possible.”
“I’ll think about it. Not right now, because I don’t want to go on board and bawl like I have been, but later I will. I promise.” I walk away and get on the plane with a heavy heart.
The thought that maybe I should turn back around and see Kip or at least talk to him on the phone keeps going through my head. He may not be able to accept the feelings he and I have for each other, but he needs to come to terms with what he’s going to feel for this child, if anything.
I take my seat on the plane and turn my phone to airplane mode and lay my head back. I’m not going to call him, I’m not going to do that to myself again. Maybe once I get home, but not now.
Kip
The traffic got worse the minute I got back on the highway to get to the airport. Finally I made it, but now I can’t seem to find her or anyone who knows a damn thing about the flights to Austin. So I’m kind of running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to find the gate to any flight to Texas.
I see a small amount of people getting in line to get on a plane and as I come up I can see it’s going to Austin. But I don’t see Peyton. I walk up to the stewardess who’s taking the tickets.
“Excuse me, did a young woman with blonde curls and hazel eyes, a bit more green than brown and cute little rosebud lips, get on already?”
“Sorry, I can’t tell you anything about the passengers, sir,” she states without even glancing at me.
“But, she’s not just any passenger. She’s my fiancé and her friends told me she was sick and she won’t answer my calls and I’m worried to death about her and she’s having my baby….”
The lady holds her hand up, stopping my ramble. “Sounds like a personal issue. Sorry, sir. I cannot help you.”
I turn around and look down, defeated. She’s gone and I won’t be able to get to her until I get on a plane and get my own ass to Texas. Slow steps I take as I walk away.
“Hey,” a young woman says as I walk past her. “You looking for someone?”
I stop and look at her. “I am, my fiancé, Peyton Reed.”
She shakes her head. “You look really different without all that make-up and hair crap, Kip.”
My surprise must show all over my face as the girl laughs at me. “How do you know who I am?”
“She told me all about you and how you’re too afraid of how you two feel about each other and you ran off this morning and left her again. Taking the ring you just gave her back was such a dick thing to do, man.” She shakes her head and gives me a look that says she’s really disappointed in me.
“I didn’t leave her. If she would’ve answered my calls, she’d know that. The woman is so crazy, and it makes me nuts. Wait, is she on that plane?”
She nods and I take her by the shoulders. “I need to get her off of it.”
“Yes you do and I think I know how I can get to her and convince her to get off. You see, it’s my ticket she has. So if you’ll wait here, I’m going to go and take it back.” She walks away and I nearly jump up and down with joy.
Somehow she has more clout with the stewardess than I did and she’s allowed to go to the plane. I pace as I wait and pray Peyton doesn’t put up too much of a fight.
A few minutes later another stewardess escorts a rather hassled looking Peyton out and she’s so busy complaining she doesn’t even notice me. “I can’t believe she did that. I need to get my luggage off the plane.”
The lady gestures to the waiting area. “We’re getting that taken care of right now, Miss Reed. If I can get you to wait right here, someone will be bringing it to you shortly.”
“Can you believe what a bitch that girl turned out to be?” Peyton asks the lady.
The lady breaks into a smile. “Sorry about that. It was her ticket though, and she did say she had a good reason.”
“Yeah but…” Peyton says but the ste
wardess interrupts her as she points at me.
“Seems someone is very interested in you, miss.”
Peyton follows the lady’s finger and finally she lays her eyes on me. They open wide. “What the hell do you want?” she asks as she walks past me.
The stewardess calls out to her. “I need you to stay right here if you want your bags back, mam.”
Peyton turns back quickly and glares at me. “I have to stay, so you have to go.”
“What is it you’re thinking, love?” I ask as I walk slowly towards her as she seems about to take off running if I approach her too quickly.
“Do not, ‘love’ me, you jack ass!”
“Darling, really. What are you thinking? I thought we got back together last night. Isn’t that what happened? Or was I dreaming that?” I ask.
She holds up her left hand and wiggles her fingers at me. “You took my ring, and you left me alone. What do you mean asking me what I’m thinking? Obviously I’m thinking you got all freaked out again and decided I, no we, are too much for you.”
I laugh and quickly stop myself as her face goes red and I’m afraid she’s about to find something and hit me with it. “Look, you got everything wrong, baby. I took the ring to get it fitted. We’re going to pick it up in a few days and get our wedding rings. I wish you would’ve read some of my texts or took one of my phone calls.”
Her eyes go soft. “Really? You didn’t get freaked and leave me? You swear it?”
Slowly I move towards her and she stands still so I may be able to get a hold of her. I run my hands up her arms and pull her to me. “I swear it, love.”
She lets out a deep breath and lays her head against my chest. “Thank God! I thought it was over and I just wanted to die.”
I rock her back and forth as I hug her tight. “Never will it be over, Peyton. You and I are a family now. What we have will never be over. Not ever, love.”
Little sobs I hear as her body starts shaking and pull her back to find her crying. “I hated you so much. Like just a minute ago and now somehow I love you again. What’s wrong with me?”
Dirty Little Virgin: A Submissives’ Secrets Novel Page 102
