I Want Your Love

by E. L. Todd

“Well, my parents are fascinated by everything that you do.”

  “Even though I study sex?” Her voice was full of surprise. “My family has always been uncomfortable with it. They think it’s too weird.”

  “They’re dicks,” I blurted. “Who cares what they think.”

  A smile stretched her lips. “You’re so lucky, Conrad.”

  “They’re pretty cool,” I said with a shrug. “But I’m telling you, they aren’t that nice to everybody. My dad was a dick to Slade for a long time.”

  “Why?”

  “He didn’t think Slade was good enough for Trinity.”

  “Well, it seems like he really loves her,” she argued.

  “He does,” I said. “But I think my dad was expecting Trinity to end up with someone totally different—not a guy covered in sleeves and who inks for a living.”

  “I have a hard time picturing your dad that way. He’s so accepting of everyone.”

  “He is,” I said. “But Trinity is a whole different situation.”

  “That’s cute,” she said. “He’s protective of his little girl.”

  “Yeah, I feel bad for her,” I said with a laugh. “My dad pretty much lets me do whatever I want.”

  “Because you’re a good guy.”

  “Yeah, I’m not bad.” I gave her a smug grin.

  She crossed her arms over her chest and stepped toward me. “Well, I guess I better head back to the hotel.”

  “Let me walk you.” It wasn’t a question. I was doing this whether she liked it or not.

  Surprisingly, she didn’t argue. “Okay.”

  We walked back to the hotel, keeping a foot between us. I wanted to grab her hand and caress her knuckles with my thumb but I kept my hands to myself. When we reached the hotel we took the elevator to her floor then headed to the door.

  “Thanks for coming,” she said as she fingered the keycard. “It was very sweet of you.”

  “I’ll always be there for you.” When I stared at her my heart started to throb in pain. I wanted to hold her, to feel her against my chest. I wanted to get lost in her, feel the familiar throes of passion. I would even settle for a night of cuddling. Anything was good enough for me.

  “I know…”

  My hands ached from the restraint I put on them. I wanted to snatch her and never let go. I felt like a psychotic monster that wanted to hoard her in my basement where no one else could enjoy her.

  “Where are you staying?” she asked, nervously tucking her hair behind her ear.

  “I don’t know,” I said. “All the hotels around here are booked. But I have a rental car so I could crash in there.”

  “You have nowhere to stay?” she asked in surprise.

  “Well, if I’m really desperate I could crash with my parents. But…I’d rather sleep in a car.”

  “You can’t just stay at the same hotel?”

  “I can’t afford it,” I said honestly. “I’m still on salary.”

  She stared at me with pity.

  “I’ll be fine, Lexie. Don’t worry about me.” I wanted to hug her good night. I could do that at least, right? It was something friends did. I closed the gap between us then pulled her flush against my body. When I felt her breasts push into my chest and her face move into my shoulder, I released the breath I was holding. This felt right.

  She leaned against me and wrapped her arms around my waist. She hugged me with the same enthusiasm, like she never wanted to let me go. Her breaths came out deep and ragged.

  My hand became brave and fisted her hair. I gripped the strands tightly like that would keep her there forever. I missed the way her soft strands felt when I ran my fingers through them. I missed everything.

  She pulled away slightly, her face closeto mine. She stared at my lips with indecision in her eyes.

  I wanted nothing more than to kiss that delicious mouth. It was something I thought about every day. My hand moved to her chin and I slowly tilted it, exposing her mouth to mine. Then I looked into her eyes, seeing her reaction to me. The same desire burned back at me.

  I closed the gap between us. The moment we touched heat rushed through me. Fire burned my body as it circled my veins and finally my heart. My body came alive for her, melting from the frost that had kept it frozen for weeks. I couldn’t get enough air because I was breathing so hard, so excited that this moment was real.

  I kissed her more aggressively, my hand gripping the back of her neck. I pressed my body against hers, loving the heat between us. She gave me the same desire, the same intensity. Her hands dug into my hair and she pulled me close, like our closeness wasn’t quite enough. “Conrad…”

  Her voice made my spine shiver. My kiss became more passionate as I took her. I wanted more of her, all of her. This night couldn’t end with just a kiss. I wanted all of her—I needed her.

  I pulled the keycard out of her pocket then got the door opened. When it cracked, I pushed it back then migrated her inside, still kissing her. I kicked the door closed behind me then lifted her into the air, feeling her legs wrap around my waist.

  Looking into her eyes as our noses were pressed together, I carried her to the bed. Fire burned in her eyes as she stared at me, and her hands cupped my face like she adored me.

  I wanted her so much.

  I lay her on the bed then moved over her, our eyes still locked together. How could she look at me like that and not want me anymore? How could she feel this paramount connection and brush it off? There was something here.

  Her eyes looking into mine, she pushed my jacket over my shoulders then peeled it off. She never looked away, not even to watch what she was doing. Her breathing was deep and shaky, and her lips were parted slightly. Then she unbuttoned my shirt, slowly opening it until she reached the last one. When the shirt was gone, she sat up slightly then kissed my chest, giving extra attention to the area over my heart.

  I watched her while my hand continued to fist her hair. Feeling her lips on me was the greatest fantasy I’d ever known. Then she leaned back and moved for my slacks, taking the belt off and unzipping them. I helped her get them down my legs by kicking them off. Then she pulled my boxers down, letting my length come out.

  She took a deep breath and it almost sounded like a gasp. She stared at him in longing, like she missed him as much as I missed the area between her legs. Her eyes burned in blue fire, the desire and lust coming further to the surface.

  It was my turn to undress her, so I slipped her heels off then moved my hand under her back where I could undue the zipper. The dress came loose and I pulled off her legs before I tossed it on the floor.

  I looked at her nearly naked body and felt my heart skip a beat. I used to see her like this nearly every day and I took it for granted. Now she looked more beautiful than ever before.

  I pressed my lips to her stomach and kissed her everywhere, tasting the skin I knew so well. My tongue moved to her hip and I kissed the area with loving embraces. She moaned every few minutes, loving what I was doing to her.

  Then I gripped the back of her thong and pulled the material down her long legs. My face immediately went to the apex of her thighs and I took a deep breath, missing her smell. It was an odd thing to do, but it was what I wanted. I loved her smell. It made my cock twitch.

  I slowly kissed her sensitive area and moved my tongue over her folds. She tasted so damn good.

  She moaned louder and gripped my hair aggressively. Her legs were wide open for me and she couldn’t control just how amazing my mouth felt.

  I circled her clitoris—my clitoris—with my tongue then sucked on it.

  Her hand moved to my shoulder and she dug her nails into my skin. Her head rolled back as she released another pant.

  I wanted to be inside her and couldn’t wait any longer. There was nothing better than making love to her. I wouldn’t say I fucked her because that wasn’t a good description. I hadn’t fucked her in a really long time. What we had now was different and shouldn’t be disrespected with such a c
rude description.

  I moved over her and separated her legs with mine. She leaned back on her elbows, the pillow just behind her. My arms moved behind her knees and I kept her body pivoted toward me.

  Before I entered her, I rubbed my nose against hers. The action was tender, something we used to do before our relationship ended. My eyes burned into hers and my chest continued to expand with deep breaths. She returned my look with an identical one.

  There was something I wanted to say but the words wouldn’t form on my tongue. I couldn’t describe what I was feeling, but something was going on deep inside me. I cared about Lexie so much, and every moment without her was a moment wasted. Feeling her pressed against me like this felt right. I didn’t want to be with another woman.

  She was all I ever wanted.

  I pressed my forehead to hers then inserted myself slowly, feeling her tightness.

  Lexie released a loud moan as I entered her, her breathing turning into loud pants.

  I didn’t kiss her. Instead, I stared at her. Our bodies were combined and it felt amazing. I hadn’t had sex in weeks and I was going through withdrawals. Being inside her felt even better than I remembered.

  Once I was completely sheathed I didn’t move. I brushed my mouth against hers then kissed the corner of her mouth. Then I kissed the opposite corner. She breathed hard while she felt me. Then I cupped her face and deepened the kiss before I started to move.

  My body was on fire the second the lovemaking began. With every thrust I fell deeper into her, giving her more of my soul. My tongue danced with hers, and all the heat and passion was making me weak for release. I wanted this night to last forever. We were starting over and giving this arrangement another chance because we clearly couldn’t stay away from each other. But that didn’t mean I wanted to rush through this reunion.

  “God, Conrad…” She gasped into my mouth as she felt me slide inside her.

  I loved it when she said my name. My hand moved down her back to the area just above her ass. I gripped it then thrust into her harder, giving her more of me and at a greater pace.

  Her moans became louder and more regular. Then she gripped my neck and kissed me with the same vigor I gave her. When she tightened around me, I knew she was about to release. Her lips were immobile against mine and she just breathed into my mouth. Then she started to moan.

  “I missed you so much,” I whispered.

  A loud gasp escaped her lips and she constricted my shaft with her body. Her head rolled back in ecstasy and her nipples hardened.

  I loved it when she came, knowing I was responsible for it.

  The orgasm stretched on for seconds before it passed. She stared at me with satisfaction in her eyes but also longing. She gripped my shoulders then rolled me to my back, about to take the reins.

  I leaned back on the pillows and stared up at her, loving the confidence and sexuality she possessed. She balanced on the balls of her feet then gripped my hands for support. I held them so they were easy for her to reach. Then she bounced on my cock repeatedly, giving it to me hard and fast. Her tits shook with every movement she made.

  I’d never been with a more beautiful woman in my life.

  Sweat formed on her chest and she kept going. Her chest flushed pink and so did her face. But the exertion didn’t stop her. All she cared about was our mutual pleasure. She bit her bottom lip before her mouth fell open in deep pants. Then she tightened around my cock again as she came. Her body bent backwards slightly as the euphoria took over.

  Watching her come again made my body stiffen in preparation for my own release. She kept riding my dick like a pro and I wanted to fill her like I had a hundred times. My hands squeezed hers and I released a grunt deep in my throat as I came hard. Lexie continued to ride me until I completely finished, releasing everything I had.

  I caught my breath after the moment passed, and my hands left hers as they moved to her hips. The passionate moment was gone but I wanted her even more. My arm moved around her waist and I pulled her to the bed and pulled the covers over us.

  We hadn’t slept together in almost a month, and as a result I hadn’t been sleeping well. I constantly woke up during the night from the lack of her beside me. When she lay beside me, I turned off the lamp then held her close to me. I pulled her leg over my hip and kept us close together.

  I finally got my girl back and I wouldn’t let her go again.

  ***

  When Lexie woke me up the next morning by moving from the bed, my eyebrows shot up and I snatched her. “Whoa…where you going pretty lady?” I pulled her back into me and lathered her neck with kisses.

  She melted into me immediately and her arms moved around me. “I have to get ready.”

  “For what? You don’t need to impress me.” My lips moved into her hair and I inhaled her scent. “I think you’re beautiful when you’re buck naked.”

  She chuckled lightly in my ear. “I need to get to the conference, Conrad.”

  “You need to stay with me, baby.” I kissed her shoulder then ran my hand up her back, keeping her tight against my body.

  “I’m sorry I can’t stay.” She moved away from me again. “I didn’t spend eight hundred bucks on a plane ticket to miss the second day of the conference.”

  “You already said your speech,” I said. “Who cares about the rest?”

  “I do.” She stood up then searched her suitcase for a black dress.

  I sighed and decided to let it go. “Well, I’ll come with you.”

  “You really don’t need to do that. You should probably just head home. Doesn’t your flight leave today?”

  I detected the dismissal in her voice. It was like she wanted to get rid of me. But why would she want that after the incredible night we had? “I can blow it off—for you.”

  “You should get back to reality, Conrad.” She walked into the bathroom and turned on the sink.

  I sat there, unsure what just happened. Now she was cold to me. It was like she hated me. I got out of bed then followed her. She faced the mirror and I stood behind her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  She pulled her hair up and started to do her make up. “It means what it means.”

  “Well, that meaning isn’t clear to me,” I snapped.

  She turned around and gave me a cold look. “We had a slip-up last night. Let’s just move on and forget about it.” Then she turned back around and applied her foundation.

  “What?” I blurted. “Last night meant nothing to you?”

  “It sure meant nothing to you.”

  What the fuck? “What the hell are you talking about? Lexie, I miss you so damn much. I flew all the way here because I wanted to support you. Would I do that if I didn’t—” I didn’t finish the sentence because the final words scared me.

  “If you didn’t what?” She watched my face in the mirror.

  I ignored the question. “So, we’re just back to what we were? Friends?”

  “What else would we be?”

  My face started to turn red in anger. “What we have is pretty damn incredible. Why would you want to end it? It doesn’t make any sense. You say you aren’t seeing anyone so why won’t you see me?”

  She suddenly turned violent and knocked everything off the counter and onto the floor. Her perfume bottle broke, and everything scattered as it stretched across the floor. The sound didn’t make me flinch but it put me on alert. She turned to me, her shoulders square and her jaw tense. “Because I don’t like liars.”

  Her words passed right through me. “Are you calling me a liar?”

  “I had a moment of weakness last night, and it never should have happened. Let’s just walk away with whatever anonymity we have left.”

  “Anonymity?” My voice dripped with venom and my arms shook. “When we made love last night it definitely didn’t feel meaningless and it’s insulting you’re considering it to be.”

  “Making love?” she said with disdain. “No, you fucked me, Conrad. Just like all
the other times.”

  What the hell was going on? Last night, we had a beautiful moment. And now it was a war zone. “I’m not a liar. What did I lie about?”

  “Just go, Conrad.” She pushed past me and walked out of the bathroom.

  I followed her, my arms swinging. “No, tell me.” I gripped her wrist and pulled her to me. “Now.”

  “I’ll ask you again.” She gave me a death threat with just her eyes. “Are you seeing anyone?”

  Why was she asking me this? I already said no. “I already gave you my answer and it hasn’t changed since. I haven’t been with anyone except you since I heard you moaning in that bathroom.”

  She pulled her wrist away then slapped me hard across the face. “Get out of my life and stay there.”

  My face turned with the force and I took a deep breath as the warmth spread through my cheek. The impact didn’t hurt, but the action burned my heart. “I’m not a liar, Lexie. If I were fucking someone I would tell you.”

  She grabbed my clothes off the ground then shoved them into my arms. “Get out before I slap you again.” She stormed into the bathroom and slammed the door, locking it behind her.

  I pulled my clothes on, feeling my chest rise and fall as I breathed through the anger. My body wanted to demolish the entire room and throw all the furniture out of the window. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs.

  I grabbed my wallet and keys as I headed to the door. Before I left, I turned toward the bathroom door. “Have a good life, Lexie.” Before I shut the door, I thought I heard the audible sound of a sniff. But I was too pissed off to care.

  Chapter Three

  Arsen

  I woke up then stared at Silke. She was sleeping peacefully beside me, her lips slightly parted and her hair scattered over the pillow. Her face was relaxed in repose, and she somehow looked more beautiful.

  Waking up to her every morning was a dream come true. She didn’t technically live with me yet, but she was at my place all the time. I loved sharing my bed with her. I’d never slept so well in my life.

  Like she could sense my alertness, she stretched slightly and moved her eyes to my face. When she looked into my eyes a slight smile formed on her lips. It looked like she woke up from a good dream to an even better one.