by Marnie Cate
“I don't.”
“Then, let her die. Her will to leave this realm is strong.”
“I don't want her to die.”
Miselda's eyes tightened as she scrutinized my face. “You see yourself in this woman, Blanche.”
Eliza had endured what I feared most. My time away from my child had been short, but I still understood the terror she felt. Yes, I could see reflections of myself in the girl. However, I refused to verbally acknowledge it.
As Eliza laid sleeping, Miselda poured liquid from a vial into the corner of her mouth and watched. After seconds, Eliza began jerking and writhing in pain. Panic consumed me.
“What did you do to her?” I cried.
“The magic is fighting against the containment. She is filled with it. The Fire and Winter together are strong. I can weaken it, but each day she must take more.”
“Her mother bound her magic. She shouldn't have Fire.”
“Mae did bind her gift. However, when the Goddess filled her with the Winter, it released the Fire. A dark version of the element, anyway.” She turned to face me directly. “It might be best to let her go.”
“What do you mean `let her go'?”
“She has the will to die. It might be better to let her go now, before…”
“Before what?”
“Before she turns dark.”
“She won't,” I said, smoothing Eliza's hair.
Miselda scrutinized me suspiciously. “How can you promise this? How can you promise you won't turn?”
“I won't. I haven't yet, though I have had many reasons to accept it. Ask Raquel.”
“Another example of your dabbling in the dark,” Miselda snorted.
“She is of the Shadows, not the Darkness,” I protested.
“But you have danced in the arms of Darkness,” Miselda said, smiling cruelly. “You've desired it.”
“I never accepted what he offered.” Feeling angry and offended, I asked, “Are you claiming your magic is pure?”
“Of course not, but mine is a gift. A gift from…” she stopped short.
My eyes pinched as I glared at her. “Who gave you your magic?”
“That is no concern of yours.” Ignoring me, she dug into her garment again. “If you want her to live, give her this,” she said, holding another vial. “Give it to her within the hour. She will convulse again, so do not let your son be in the room when you administer it. If she does not wake in twelve hours, send for me.”
“And the baby?”
“I do not sense darkness in him. He is very wise. He bears the knowledge of a child much older, as if his ancestors live through him.”
“How so?” I asked in surprise. “Which ancestors?”
“You will see as he grows. Let the maid care for him. She will see his magic, but do not stop her. Let her think she is containing it.”
“What does she know about magic?” I scoffed.
“Not all of us are descendants of protectors and gifted by Danu. Still, there is magic all around us, and Starten is full of hidden secrets. There are many kind benefactors of the magic. Gods you do not know.”
“Why do they not stop Snowystra if there are so many around? Are they just as cruel?”
“They are not concerned with the mortal world. Many would rather it be sealed up, no longer accessible to the gods.”
“Others?”
“Long to be in this world,” she admitted. “They would do anything for one moment of humanity.”
“Is she fine? Will she live?” Jameson asked from the doorway
“Yes, I have explained everything to your…to Blanche,” Miselda said. Staring at him, she finally said, “So close to power, yet, so far away. Your desire to be Shah has never been quenched, nor shall it. You will never be her king.”
Jameson's mouth gaped open.
“It would do you well to close those dreams away and focus on what is in front of you. Protect your family from the Winter Goddess. Staying out of the Shadows is a way of containing her. It slows down the feeding of her power. As you weaken her, you will find more freedom.”
“How could I possibly weaken her?” Jameson asked.
“Stop filling the desert with her power. The Dorcha were not created by the Mother Goddess to fulfill her weakness. They have been corrupted and twisted, like your people. Free them.”
“How? There is no way I could do this,” Jameson said.
“You will step down at one point,” she said, pointing her aged finger at him. “You will watch as the butterfly rises, and you will accept your fate.”
Jameson glared at her. His patience with Miselda was growing thin. I worried he would lash out soon.
“Enough,” I said, trying to diffuse the brewing tension. “Cedric is probably racked with guilt and worry for Eliza. Can we send message to him that she will live?”
I glanced at Miselda willing her to confirm my words.
“She will heal, if you continue to give her the treatment I provided.”
“My grandson?”
“He will be fine. I have given him medication to help him, as well.” She glanced towards Jameson, and said, “You know your tunnels are full of —”
“Yes, I know what they are full of,” he said weakly, diverting his eyes.
“Please return me to my home. You may call upon me again if my assistance is needed. However, next time, I prefer you not rip me from my slumber. Instead, a knock on my door will do,” Miselda said with a wry smile.
“I am sorry for the way I brought you. Time was of the essence. You have given my family a great gift in healing Eliza,” he said, bowing.
Clutching her hand, I said, “Thank you, Miselda. Thank you for everything.”
“Unguard your heart, Blanche. Sealing it away will not stop her, it will only harm you.” With those words, Jameson began the process of transporting her home.
As they faded away, I saw hope in Jameson's eyes.
* * *
I sat by Eliza watching the clock slowly tick. When the hour was up, I gave her the last drop of the potion. Her body spasms were even more intense. As she thrashed and screamed, I worried I had made a mistake in giving it to her. I waited for Cedric to burst through the door at any moment, fearing his response.
When she stopped convulsing, Eliza did not collapse into sleep. Instead, she sat up glaring at me. “Why did you not let me die?” she cried.
“It's not your time,” I said, smoothing her hair. “It's not your time.”
Chapter 29
Having a baby in our home brought a spark of life to it. I wanted to cuddle and spoil the boy. He was strong and smart. He watched everything around him so intently. He wanted to know how everything worked. Despite Miselda's warning to unblock my heart, I could not convince myself to show my love for Miles. Instead, I stood in the shadows and watched as this bright baby grew.
When he was three, I walked by his room to see Hazel huddled over him. “No, not today. You cannot use that now. Put it away.”
He clapped and patted out small flames of green. When he obeyed, she hugged him. “Good boy, very good boy.”
Stepping into the room, I surprised them. My entrance caused Hazel to shudder. I hid my delight as I asked with usual cold tone, “Has my grandson been taking his vitamins?”
“Yes, Mrs. Drygen. I was just going to give it to him now.”
“Yuck,” Miles said, wrinkling his small face.
“He does not care for milk anymore,” Hazel explained.
“Maybe he would prefer juice?” I suggested.
Miles' eyes lit up and he nodded in agreement.
“I will have some sent up. Does he like any particular kind?” I asked. Instantly, I felt ashamed that I didn't know my grandson's preferences.
“He is not particular, but he seems to like grape juice the best.”
Miles nodded emphatically.
“You will need to take your medicine every day,” I said, smoothing his hair.
“Yes, gra
ndmother,” he replied in his small voice.
“Hazel, may I see you alone for a moment?” I asked.
“Of course, ma'am.” She nodded, and followed me from the room.
When we stepped into the hallway, I cornered her. “I do not care how he takes it, but he must take the vitamins every day. If he won't drink it, put it in his food. He must have it, you understand. My family has a long history of a deadly disease. If you miss a dose, he could lose his life.”
“Of course, Mrs. Drygen.”
As I walked away, she called, “Mrs. Drygen.”
“Yes, Hazel.”
“I wanted to thank you for allowing me to work in your home. It has eased the pain of losing my own family.”
“You are welcome, but remember, he is my grandson, and I make all the decisions for his life. Has his mother been around?”
Hazel hesitated. “She stops by to whisper questions to him. He always says no to her inquiries, and she leaves angrily.”
“How does Miles react?”
She gestured noncommittally. “He knows his answers have not pleased her, but he always tries again when she returns.”
“And my son?”
“Mr. Drygen is very gruff with him, but I can tell he cares for Miles.”
“Very well,” I relented with a sigh. “My grandson must know manners and etiquette. He must know how to present himself as a strong representative of the Drygen name. As he continues to progress, I will allow you to care for him.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Drygen.”
“The juice will be sent up. Be sure to give him the medicine,” I said firmly, and walked away.
* * *
Months after Miles turned five years old, Eliza became convinced the only way to free our family was by regaining her power. She wrote in journals, over and over, as though obsessed. These were not like the ones of her younger days. These were full of ramblings.
Eliza had become manic in her desire to free herself from Snowystra. I did not realize how far she slipped until Cedric came to me with her current plan. The revelation was shocking.
“Snowystra has returned. She wants us to have more children. She is convinced this one will be the answer,” my son told me.
I inhaled deeply. “She is always convinced.”
“Mother, Snowystra said if we do not have more children, she will take one of Eliza's daughters.”
I looked up in alarm. “And what did Eliza say?”
“She is going to see her mother. She said she will demand her magic be returned,” Cedric explained. “I read her journals. She is convinced it is the only way.”
“When is she going?” I asked. I had to find a way to stop her. Eliza was too unstable to have access to her magic. What did she think she could so? She was not fit to care for her son let alone the girls. They needed to stay safe, where they were protected.
“I keep stopping her, but I won't be able to for much longer,” he said, pouring a drink.
“You must make her understand how dangerous this is,” I insisted.
Eliza entered the room. She was dressed as she had been in the tunnels. She was covered in hideous snake jewelry and her wild mane of red was streaked with even more white. Even her eyes held darkness. The green was gone. Now, they were a dark almost black color.
Eliza looked ready to battle, not to be a mother. I feared my attempts to contain the magic had just corrupted hers. Unless, she had stopped taking it.
“Has Eliza been taking the herbs?” I asked in a whisper.
Cedric looked away.
“Cedric, she must take them,” I insisted.
“I know, Mother, but she says they make her sick. She is convinced you are trying to poison her.”
“I give you the same vitamins. Do you think I would poison my son to hurt her?”
“Of course not. I have been taking them daily,” Cedric confirmed. “On the days I forget, I feel weak, so I quickly take them.”
“She must take them, too, Cedric.”
“I will not take your medicine,” Eliza barked. “I am sick of having my magic contained.”
“What are you talking about Eliza?” I asked. Did she know what I had done?
“I went to my mother. She will not release my magic, and worse, she won't give me back my daughters. She has poisoned them against me,” she snarled. ”She has convinced Marina that I want to hurt them. My own daughter said such hateful things to me."
“The small child?” I asked.
“She was kept from me, but I will get her back. I will get them both back.”
The look on Eliza's face frightened me. This was not the young woman I had known before. “What do you intend on doing?” I asked her.
“I will wait for the New Moon Festival,” she answered. “My mother will be busy with her business, and preparing Meg for the dance. She will not worry about me taking them in the night.” Her smile was maniacal. “I'll have all my children in my home.”
“Of course, your children will be in my home,” I said, correcting her.
“One day, we will rectify this my part,” Eliza threatened as she glared at me.
“Enough,” Cedric said, taking her arm. “Let's talk privately.”
“Of course, my sweet champion will assist me. He will always put my needs first,” she purred. Stroking his face, she began to kiss him as if I wasn't in the room.
Clearing my throat, Cedric gently pulled away and took her hand. As he guided her out of the room, he looked back at me. His eyes pleaded with me to ignore her comments.
He was correct, of course. She did not know what she was saying. She was mad.
* * *
As I prepared myself for the festival, there was a small knock on my door. Turning, I saw my grandson standing in the doorway. “Yes, Miles?” I asked.
“Grandmother, may I go to the Summer Moon Festival, too?” Miles asked politely.
“I think that would be fine,” I said. “You may come. I will have Hazel take you.”
“I cannot go with you?” he asked, his voice holding the same disappointment I felt.
“There are many people who will want to cause you harm because of your name. You will be safer to go as Hazel's ward,” I tried to explain. I knew Hazel waited in the hallway, so I called to her, “Dress him like a normal child. We will leave soon.”
In the car ride, Miles was a ball of energy. He was very excited, but he remembered my rules when I quizzed him. No one would know he was a Drygen. As extra protection, I had my driver pull into the alley to let them out. Once again, I reminded him of my rules.
“Stay far away from me, but make sure Miles enjoys everything at the Festival,” I ordered Hazel.
The driver delivered me to Main Street. As I walked down the busy road, people nodded at me. I did not receive the same welcome I had received as Roger's wife, but I didn't blame them for their distance. I had secluded myself for many years, and only presented myself in business situations. I was respect though, and possibly feared.
They feared I would take away their jobs. It was my good graces that kept them in their simple homes, supporting their simple lives. They knew it as well as I did. That was where my real power lied.
When I reached Mae's store, I couldn't help admire it. Most of the shops around her were simple wood stands. The typical seller had just a stand with a tabletop area for the goods to be presented, but Chester had added on to her a portable storefront. You could walk in to browse her wares.
Small twinkling lights and soft music invited me to enter. I could appreciate the care Chester put into it. The chestnut wood was carved with delicate vines of ivy and small flowers. Once again, I felt envious of everything Mae had.
I browsed the shelves filled with bottles of tonics and elixirs, deep bins for the breads and pastries and a rack for dried herbs. I had gone unnoticed at first. Then, she caught sight of me. Meeting her gaze, I headed towards her.
“Mae, it has been such a long time. What a nice surprise to see you
still running your little stand,” I said icily. I looked around her store, trying to appear disgusted by it.
“You know as well as I do, Blanche, that this is not a surprise. I am sure that if you are here, you are up to no good,” Mae snapped. “Why don't you crawl back up the mountain you came from?”
“I see time has not made you any smarter, Mae. I just came to see the lunar festivities. I was told one of my new granddaughters would be performing her first Lunar Dance. Since the girls will soon be coming to live with us, I thought it would be nice for me to show my support,” I said. I didn't have to force my expression. Mae had everything while I had nothing. She would not make me feel like an intruder on our town's activities.
I had prepared myself carefully for this moment. I had styled my short silver hair carefully. I even took the time to apply makeup to highlight my violet eyes. When I chose the long black dress, I had delighted in the fact I could still wear a tight dress with a deep slit up the right thigh. On most women our age, a dress like mine would seem desperate. However, I knew it looked stunning on me. My vanity would help me keep my confidence.
“You will have nothing to do with those girls. I suggest you leave, and take your machinations elsewhere,” Mae snarled at me. Small flames of fire began to spark from her hands. How interesting, I thought, she has Fire magic.
I looked at Mae with sadness. I twisted the snake ring on my pinky. Eliza had given it to me. She had insisted it would keep me safe.
Finally, I spoke. “You never seem to learn that you cannot insult my family and get away with it.”
I could see Eliza's daughters watching.
“What a joy it will be to take away another of yours.” Turning on my heels, I called back to them, “Goodbye, girls. I will see you soon.”
* * *
Sitting in the audience, I watched Meg Stone dance her solo. What a beautiful child she was. After the dance ended and the stage lights went out, I sat thinking about the small girl. There was something familiar about her. Yes, Eliza was her mother, but it was something more. She reminded me of my mother.
Suddenly, the spotlights began circling the stage. A soft mist covered the platform and the light stopped in the center. Out of the haze, a tall man appeared, carrying one of the dancers. As he moved forward, I recognized the child in his arms. It was Meg. She did not look scared, but instead, extremely happy.
