Where We Belong

by J. Daniels

  And him smiling right now is the only response he’s giving up. He isn’t going to tell me anything about this surprise of his.

  Well . . . two can play at this game.

  Sitting up a little taller, I steal my hand back and turn my head, looking out into the yard. “I have a surprise too. A kinky surprise. It’s epic to the nth degree. Probably illegal.” I smirk when I feel his eyes on me. “Not telling you anything about it either.”

  “When is this surprise going down?”

  “Tomorrow.”

  I pinch my eyes shut, clenching my teeth and growling, annoyed with myself for not holding to my previous statement. A little annoyed with Ben for getting information out of me so easily.

  Pathetic. I can never keep anything from my husband. Just being in his presence is like taking a shot of truth serum. And this is a good surprise! It should be kept secret.

  Come on, Mia. Play the game well or don’t put yourself in it.

  “That’s all you’re getting,” I promise. I actually sound convincing.

  Ben leans further into me. His nose brushes against my hair. “This surprise have anything to do with that sexy as fuck slip you were wearing today when I was pushing inside of you?” he asks quietly, even though there is no way the boys can hear us right now. They are too far away and being too noisy themselves.

  Still. Whispered words have a bit more indecency to them than things spoken at normal octaves. And Ben is all about the indecency.

  I tilt my chin. My cheeks burn.

  Damn it.

  “I have no memory of such thing,” I lie.

  He laughs darkly in my ear. “Which part, baby? Your ass in my hands while you fucking owned my mouth, my fingers stretching you until you begged me for more, or my cock filling that tight pussy. You telling me you’re forgetting some of that?” He grips my thigh. My entire body shudders. “‘Cause I’m betting you remember every second of it, pretty girl. I’m betting you’re getting wet right now just thinking about what we did.”

  Blushing, I turn my head and bring us nose to nose, expecting to see desire pooling in Ben’s eyes. Hunger, but only recognizing love. Strong and steady love. That warmth he has inside of him, pouring out onto me.

  His motive becomes clear.

  “Are you trying to distract me, Benjamin Kelly?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Why?”

  He reaches up and moves his knuckles over my cheek. “‘Cause I don’t like seeing my girl upset. If I can change that, make you smile somehow, I’m going to do it. I don’t want you worrying, Mia. Ever. This shit with Angie is going to be handled. I know me telling you that you have absolutely nothing to worry about with Nolan isn’t going to stop you from sitting out here and thinking the worst. I see you doing it, baby. I thought maybe I could take your mind off of it for a minute. Get you thinking about something else. Did it work?”

  Of course Ben plays dirty when it comes to distraction. I wouldn’t expect anything less.

  I couldn’t appreciate anything more.

  Nodding, I hold onto his wrist. “Yes. It did. Thank you.”

  “I don’t want you thinking you’re ever alone, Mia. What you feel, I feel. Anything that upsets you, tears me apart. It’s always been like that.”

  “Always? Even before?” I ask, fighting tears again, smiling at my own absurd question and the tender look he’s giving me.

  Even before . . . He knows what I mean—when we both hated each other. When Ben had nothing but mean things to say to me and I had nothing but awful thoughts filling my head about him. When I associated the name Benjamin Kelly with every curse word I could think of, and he barely spoke mine without tacking on a few of them.

  Did it tear him apart upsetting me back then?

  I know the answer. And I know the one he’s going to give me too.

  Because this is Ben. My Ben. The man who convinces me every day without realizing it that my life was always his.

  Even before.

  “Yeah, Angel,” he answers with nothing but honesty in his voice, trusting those words and breathing meaning into them, enough so that I’ll accept his certainty and forget the one I was sure of.

  We choose to believe what we want to believe. I choose Ben. He is my truth.

  Sighing, I press my lips to his, kissing him slowly and moving my fingers along his cheek.

  “I love you,” I breathe into his mouth.

  He drops his forehead against mine. “That’s all I need, Mia. All I’ll ever need.”

  I close my eyes.

  God, what did I do to deserve this man?

  Leaning back, I study his face. His dark eyebrows and the freckle under his left eye. The day-old stubble coating his jaw.

  “Is there really a surprise?” I ask, poking the spot on his cheek where his right dimple appears.

  He nods. “You?”

  Nodding, I kiss him once more, smiling against his mouth, wanting so badly to tell him what I have planned for us tomorrow.

  But I don’t. And I’m not going to, as long as he doesn’t ask me anything else about it.

  Letting my hands fall away, I turn and look at the boys.

  Chase is flinging sand everywhere and Nolan is filling up a pail.

  “We should tell Nolan now, that way you aren’t springing this on him tomorrow. Give him a little time to think about it. You know?”

  I have no idea how Nolan is going to take hearing about Angie wanting to see him. I know he’s asked Ben about her in the past, wondering what happened to her and why she isn’t around anymore, but I haven’t heard of him bringing her up recently.

  Unless Ben isn’t telling me.

  “Yeah. Good idea.”

  Ben stretches his legs and stands from the step. He grabs my hand and tugs me to my feet, walking with me across the yard.

  The boys look up as we draw closer.

  Chase slowly climbs out of the sandbox, lifting one leg over the wooden ledge, then the other, teetering a bit on his feet before rushing to greet us.

  I pick him up and kiss his chubby cheek. “Baby,” I murmur against his skin, smelling the orange he ate an hour ago for a snack.

  “Nolan. Come here a minute.”

  Hearing Ben’s voice, Nolan hops out of the sandbox and hurries over.

  “Yeah?” he asks, tilting his head up, the front of his shorts and T-shirt covered in a light dusting of sand.

  Ben squats down and rests his hand on Nolan’s shoulder. “Buddy, you remember Angie, right? Your other Mommy? The one you used to live with before you moved in with Daddy and Princess Mia?”

  His big eyes flick to mine, then he looks back up at Ben, nodding his head.

  “She wants to see you. Would you like that? Would you like to go see her tomorrow?”

  Nolan stares at Ben for a moment. “Why does she want to see me?”

  “Because she misses you,” I tell him, smiling when he glances up at me, keeping all of my other emotions hidden and only giving Nolan what he needs to see—my happiness for him. “She hasn’t seen you in so long, baby. I bet she won’t believe how big and strong you’ve gotten.”

  My words don’t seem to reach Nolan. Or my happiness.

  Brow pinched together and his mouth pulling into a frown, his little nostrils flaring with his heavy breaths, he keeps his passive focus on Ben. “But I want to stay here. I don’t want to live somewhere else again.”

  “You aren’t living anywhere else, Buddy. You’re just visiting Angie. I’m not leaving you there.”

  “Does she want to see Chasey too?”

  I shift Chase to my other hip. “I’m going to keep him home while you and Daddy go see her, okay? That way you two can talk and your brother won’t interrupt you.”

  Nolan shakes his head. “I don’t wanna go if Chasey doesn’t go.”

  “Nolan.” Ben’s hand falls away when Nolan moves to stand in front of me.

  “Are you gonna stop being my mommy now?” he asks, genuine fear tightening his voice.


  My mouth goes slack. Any emotion I was trying to keep from Nolan comes bubbling to the surface, demanding to be acknowledged.

  Squatting down in front of him, with tears brimming my eyes and my chest compressing so much I can only take in shallow breaths, I set Chase down and reach for Nolan.

  “I will never stop being your mommy. Not ever. Okay?” I cup his face, wiping some sand off of his cheek. “You’re my little knight. And you and Chase, you will always be my two favorite boys. This doesn’t change that, Nolan. Your other mommy can love you too. We can both love you, and we can both be your mommy.”

  “I don’t want to call her Mommy.”

  Ben rubs Nolan’s back, briefly glancing at me while holding onto Chase with his other arm. “You can call her Angie, Buddy. You don’t have to call her Mommy.”

  I nod when Nolan looks at me, grabbing onto his hands. “Whatever you want to do.”

  “Can you come with us?” he asks quietly, pleading with his eyes. “Please, Mommy? And Chasey? I think she wants to see everybody.”

  Angie wants to see me and the son I have with her ex?

  Yeah, I’m sure.

  I breathe a laugh. Tears wet my cheeks. “You want me to go, baby?”

  Nolan nods his head.

  “Buddy . . .”

  “Okay. I’ll go,” I interrupt Ben, smiling at Nolan and running my finger down his nose. He reaches out and does the same to me. “You want me there, I’m there.”

  “Cool.” He looks between Ben and myself, the apprehension in his face vanishing. “Can I go play now? My castle is really coming together.”

  Smiling against my hand, I watch Ben rustle Nolan’s dark hair. Sand falls onto his shoulders.

  “Yeah, Buddy,” Ben chuckles. “Go play.”

  Nolan spins around and dashes across the yard toward the sandbox. Chase immediately starts fighting against Ben’s hold, grunting until he’s put on his feet. He takes off running after his brother.

  Ben looks over at me. “Are you sure you’re okay with going tomorrow? Baby, I can talk to Nolan. He’ll be fine with whatever. You don’t have to do this.”

  I move to stand in front of him, reaching for his arms and pulling them around my waist as we both face the boys. My head drops back against his chest.

  “He wants me there. I think it’ll make him feel more at ease about it if it’s all of us with him. He’s nervous.”

  Nolan thought he was leaving us. That we were sending him to live with Angie again. He looked so worried.

  I’ll do anything to avoid him feeling anxious about this.

  “I’ll be fine,” I say, determined to be there for Nolan. “Whatever he needs me to do, I’ll do. I just hope it doesn’t involve hugging that bitch.”

  I can play nice, but there’s a line even I am not willing to cross. She’ll be lucky to get a smile out of me.

  Ben laughs against my hair. His grip around my waist tightens.

  We stand in the middle of the yard, watching the boys play until the telling signs of tiredness shadow their faces. After baths and story time, I escort the boys into our bedroom, not theirs.

  I don’t want tonight to be the night they stay asleep in their own rooms. I want them with me.

  Ben gives me a questioning look as they climb up onto the bed and under the covers.

  I shrug.

  He smiles, nodding once, understanding my need to have them close tonight.

  Usually I’m praying for a moment alone with Ben, minutes where we can grasp at each other before the boys are waking up and crying out for us.

  Not tonight.

  Tonight I choose little elbows poking me in the ribs and feet kicking out. Tonight I choose a restless night’s sleep from a wiggling body beside me and hot breath against my neck.

  Right now, nothing sounds more comfortable.

  Ben

  HEAVY RAIN PELTS AGAINST THE windshield of the squad car as Luke drives us out of the precinct parking lot.

  It’s been coming down like this all day. Rain so thick the only discernible indication of approaching traffic being the weakened headlights slicing through the sheets of precipitation. Shit conditions to drive in. Standing water on a few main roads has caused some issues. Several vehicles have gotten stuck. According to my weather app, it’s supposed to keep up with this intensity and continue pouring the rest of the week.

  But what the fuck do I care about the weather in Ruxton over the next few days? I’m leaving soon. Taking my woman and getting some much needed time together.

  And the forecast for Sparrow’s Island? Sunny and warm.

  Perfect Mia bikini weather.

  Goddamn. I can not wait for this. Two days alone with my wife. No kids. No disruptions. I get her for forty-eight hours straight and I’m taking advantage of every minute.

  I’m tasting every part of Mia. Touching every inch. Taking . . .

  Stripping her of her clothes the second I get her in that room and burning the outfits I packed for her ‘cause she won’t need them. I want her in the flesh. On every surface of that villa. Skin to skin, her soft curves pressing up against me while I move inside that sweet perfection I’ll never deserve. While I devote every second of those forty-eight hours to her pleasure. To ours. Nothing between us but our panting breaths and the space I’ll allow myself to have just to fucking stare at her.

  I shift in my seat a little.

  Fuck, my balls are drawing up just thinking about it. I need her. This day can’t end soon enough.

  And before it ends, Mia will be giving me her own little surprise.

  I rub at my jaw, thinking as I stare out the window. Beside us, a tractor trailer drives through a puddle. A rush of water sloshes on the hood.

  What is she planning? I can’t imagine it being anything related to fucking. Not with the kings of cock-block roaming the house.

  She knows it’s pointless.

  I get hard. She slides down on my dick. Five seconds later someone cries or screams or beats their tiny fists against the door, begging and bargaining for entry. Turning the locked knob and sobbing harder when they’re kept out.

  Mia tenses. I’m thrown off of my game. I can’t fuck my wife when my kid is crying ten feet away, when I can see his little fingers reaching underneath the door and tapping the carpet, his husky voice desperate and sad.

  I also can’t keep experiencing five seconds of Mia’s pussy. It’s torture. The worst kind.

  Here’s a taste of heaven. Oh, you love it here? Too fucking bad. Time’s up.

  For the sake of my balls and everyone’s sanity, we haven’t tried anything the past couple of nights. We were in agreement, both of us on the same page. Now she’s throwing a surprise at me?

  She said it’s epic. I’d classify every surprise Mia has ever given me involving her body as epic.

  The time she videoed herself masturbating and sent it to me while I was working a double. Or the time she woke me up taking half of my cock into her ass.

  Christ, I’ll never forget that anniversary. Filthy girl. She made me come so hard that night.

  She might be as sex starved as I am, but she isn’t a sadist. Mia wouldn’t try and pull something tonight knowing damn well whatever we start, we won’t be finishing. That eliminates anything sexual in nature. And if it doesn’t involve her tits and ass, I’m stumped. It could be anything.

  Maybe she’s pregnant.

  The idea shocks my awareness, spreading to every thought center of my brain and eliminating any and all other possibilities.

  It makes sense. Mia has surprised me before with news like that. And we did have that one day last month when she managed to get Chase asleep while Nolan was at school.

  I was out, dead to the world after my shift, but the second I felt her hot tongue on my cock the last thing on my mind was getting any rest.

  I pinned her down and fucked her hard and fast on the floor until she came with a scream muffled by my hand. My orgasm quickly followed. Afterward, we laughed tog
ether as we admired each other’s rug burns. I kissed the scarlet marks on her skin.

  Holy shit. Is that it? Am I going to get home tonight and hear my angel telling me she’s carrying another one of my kids?

  “Fuck,” I whisper, scrubbing my face.

  My head drops against the seat.

  “What?” Luke glances over at me. “You forget your wallet or something?”

  He notches up the speed of the wipers to the highest setting. It does little to improve visibility. I can barely see the lines on the road myself.

  I shake my head, ignoring the weird smirk he’s wearing.

  “Why are we going out to get lunch again?” I ask, gesturing at the weather. “We could’ve ordered in and avoided this shit. I can’t see anything.”

  “I can see.”

  “Is that why you keep leaning forward?”

  He glares through the windshield. “Fuck off.”

  I chuckle, staring ahead as he drives us into town.

  Luke insisted on running out to grab something today. Arguing some bullshit about how food always tastes better when you eat it inside the establishment.

  What the fuck does that matter?

  Asshole. He wouldn’t shut up about it. He also wasn’t hearing me when I said I wasn’t interested in spending any more time on the road in these conditions. We’ve been out in it all day. I was fine staying in, but he kept pressing.

  Naming different restaurants with quick service and stunning views. Like he gives a shit about scenery. Pulling up menus on his phone and reading to me the in-house specials. I couldn’t take it anymore. It was like being in the toy store with Nolan, only instead of the newest Lego kit, Luke was on the verge of begging me to go out on a fucking date with him.

  He paced in front of my desk until I launched out of my seat and shoved his ass outside. I’m sure if I didn’t have some muscle on him, Luke would’ve chosen that tactic himself.

  It would’ve saved him a fuckload of time.

  “Fucking Christ,” he mumbles, sitting up a little taller. The corner of his eye narrows.

  “You can’t see shit,” I snap. “Pull over. You’re going to get us killed.”

  “Anybody ever tell you you’re the worst passenger ever? How does Mia stand it?”